008 | Sherlock Holmes | [Accidental Video]

[couldbdangerous]

[The video starts with a clattering and a soft noise of frustration, as someone has clearly dropped and caught his mobile, hitting buttons in the process. Not terribly surprising given how much said individual's hand appears to be shaking, itself evident by the blurring in the video and the soft clattering of plastic on some hard surface when he

Comments

[occamschainsaw]

You'll never get a kick off anything in there, you know? Tried, no luck. Unless you mix everything and add vodka. Or scotch. Really, it depends what your poison is.

[couldbdangerous]

Had the kick, thanks. About... ten years ago.

[At the moment he's just trying to stop it stinging.]

[occamschainsaw]

Relapse? Ouch! You have a fun night ahead, withdrawals ahead too. I doubt they have anything to help with that either, it's a pretty useless store cupboard. The price you pay for being strung out of your eyeballs 10 years ago. Not that I'm judging.

Heroin or cocaine?

[couldbdangerous]

Yes, a relapse of being twenty-three. Give or take. Does funny things to your brain chemistry, turns out. Or maybe I'm just remembering. Bloody vivid memory, if so. Doesn't matter.

Cocaine. Seven percent solution via intravenous injection, generally.

[So... yes. Fun night. Or... years, really, off and on. Mostly on.]

You lot can't have used up all the benzodiazepines already.

[occamschainsaw]

Have you become obsessed with masturbating and terrible rock music? Cause that pretty much sums up an mans brain in their twenties. Then it changes to -- well, maybe a better taste in music.

[House likes his style, cocaine was not something he dabbled in personally but he wasn't opposed to ever trying, even if it was probably damaging... but who cared? Life was dull and any escape was a good escape, even dangerous drugs.]

I called dibs on it, just in case, I'm stocking up for a rainy day. If you're that absolutely desperate, I might be able to share.

[couldbdangerous]

I must not be a man. That does explain a lot. Mostly I'm thinking about how atrocious it is that we haven't had a nice murder in ages.

Well, and your opiate addiction. The leg? Slope of your shoulders; you use a cane, put too much weight on it, probably on the wrong side, so obviously it pains you.

[occamschainsaw]

You're either a violent psychopath who just really gets off on murders... or you're bored. We all know it's the second one. all but total idiots anyway. So, likely conclusion, you're either with the police or a private investigator.

[When House was bored, he wanted sick people. This guy wanted murder, it was clear what he did. And he didn't have the makings of a serial killer, that was unlikely and just waaaay too much fun to hope for.]

... Is that meant to be impressive? Cause I walk these halls a lot, everyone knows. The cane is always such a give away!

[couldbdangerous]

High-functioning sociopath who gets off on murders and is bored. Consulting detective. Close enough.

[Don't worry, he's not impressed either.]

I was merely observing. Though for the record, I have been asleep for... oh, a little over a month?

I'm afraid I have not seen you before. Shocking, I know, that I didn't rush out to gaze upon your glory the moment I awoke.

[occamschainsaw]

There's no such thing as a high function sociopath, it's not something that can be gauged like autisms. You're just a sociopath, which is unlikely. People love self diagnosis these days, everyone has to have something. Been online and just felt like a bitching new title to explain away being a total ass?

[He snorts in disbelief. Everybody lies.]

Pfft, you missed one hell of a show. I woke up and the light shone upon me as if I had been personally selected to protect and serve your medical needs. Seriously, people wept with joy and threw confetti, large elephants paraded around... it was magical.

[couldbdangerous]

Oh no, I have an official diagnosis. It's a bollocks diagnosis, but it is official. Occasionally shuts people up, too. Worth a try.

I've already got a doctor, I'm afraid. The elephants might have been of some momentary interest, though.

[occamschainsaw]

Yeah cause diagnosis's are just never wrong, just like I clearly have no leg pain what so ever.

[Doctor are looking for any excuse to label people to, several claimed he had aspergers. He didn't.]

You know sociopaths are inherently incapable of forming any sort of connection or friendship, so you'd have no friends if you were one, sound about right? And you'd also be unable to feel guilt or empathy. Why would someone with no empathy or feelings want to solve murders and help people? And yeah, you are helping people. Deal with it.

[couldbdangerous]

I did just say it was a crap diagnosis.

[SIGH.]

Though admittedly I'm not very good with guilt or empathy. Not very good with friends, either. Oh dear.

I like puzzles. That there are people involved with whom I must occasionally deal is an unfortunate fact but one I have learnt to accept.

[occamschainsaw]

...

[Was this kid reading his mind?]

Puzzles. Huh. This is weird. Your mom never visited America, right?

[Wilson was right, he seriously hated people like himself. It wasn't right.]

[couldbdangerous]

Not within the time range I assume you're suggesting. Unfortunately many men produce abnormal children.

[Well...]

Or fortunately, really, under the circumstances.

[occamschainsaw]

Everyone is abnormal, just some more than others. Everyone is screwed up, fact of life. Usually by their parents too. What did mommy and daddy do? Spoil you too much or not enough? You're an attention seeker but that so wasn't the reason for the drugs, that was boredom. I'm leaning towards spoilt personally. Daddy didn't buy you a yacht so you got super into murder?

[He was a determinist, everyone was a brat for a reason.]

And for the record, just because you like puzzles, avoid the person you're helping and find the whole act of social contracts stupid, doesn't mean you're a sociopath. It means you're pretty much any other guy with a brain that works properly who doesn't feel like playing along with the rest of the world. You're an ass, enjoy it. I do.

[couldbdangerous]

It. Is. A. Crap. Diagnosis. Of this I'm quite aware, as I have previously stated.

[Maybe if he says it slowly enough and enunciates carefully enough...]

I'm beginning to think you're a short-term amnesiac though. Or an idiot. More likely the latter; it's much more common.

As for what my parents did, they fucked, I assume, and birthed me. You could narrow your eyes and nod knowingly over the time my father ran off with the maid, never did bother to find out where to, and you'd have loved my brother. I'm afraid that the former incident had much to do with the fact that I was a very troublesome child and my brother's just naturally a prat with an eating disorder.

I am not, in fact, a sociopath, so well-spotted there, let me just reiterate that one more time, but I'm not neurotypical either. I dislike people and I have no empathy because I don't understand them. I learned to read people because I don't understand them, so, brain that works properly, no, sorry, odd assumption to make. You're wrong there, but that's alright, it works