i was driving home from work, crying my eyes out.. i ran a redlight by accident and almost drove off the road. i'm totally sick.. when i got inside my house i started crying because my body hurt so bad. i'm dizzy, i can't stop coughing, my head kills.. and i had a bloody nose. i never get bloody noses. when i pulled the tissue out of my nose, a ( Read more... )

[my daughter's] barbie can often be found lying among the other toys on the family-room foor, largely naked, her big hairdo going in all directions as though she has just been engaging in wild party activities with elmo and winnie the pooh, who lie nearby, looking happy but tired. i suspect that when i'm not looking, they smoke little toy ( Read more... )

( i'm vain.. wanna fuck? )

( your mother goes to college )

From : Trophy Scars Fans Sent : Sunday, January 2, 2005 10:02 PM ( Read more... )

a huge dog came after me. it was the kind of dog that chases automobiles..and brings them back ( Read more... )

funny story continued...

the boy forgot about her.

i have two ( Read more... )

happy new year! in new york as part of the annual tradition, they dropped a giant ball in times square. in los angeles, as part of tradition, Anna Nicole Smith fell off a couch.

-conan o'brien.

sucker<3

stole this from lainz0rz ( Read more... )