rough copy (t-ara, soyeon/eunjung)
rough copy
group: t-ara
pairing: soyeon/eunjung
length: ~1800w
“This will be for the best,” are the last words slipping past the lips she’s graced so many times in the past few months before the love of her existence steps out of the room - and with that, her life.
And for the millionth time since their relationship was ruined, she wonders where things went so wrong.
*
She arrives home from work three hours later than she’s supposed to due to some extra errands she had to run (as a newbie, she had to sacrifice a lot of things to keep her job; one crucial one being free time) and she immediately collapses on the couch, head buried in a pillow as she fights the urge to fall asleep right there, right in that second. She gets up, eventually, a deep sigh being the only evidence for her fatigue as she waddles over to the bathroom to wash her face with some cold water (it helps her wake up) and brush her teeth (she probably should stop drinking so much coffee) and she almost trips over a pile of dirty towels lying carelessly on the floor. She picks them up and opens the washing machine to throw them all inside when her eyes catch the glimpse of two syllables she’s been dreading to see if connected in one word and albeit so, she still reaches to pull the towel printed with the name “Soyeon” on it out of the bunch.
(“Eunjung! Jungie~ Yah, where are you? I got you something!”
Eunjung peeked her head from behind the wardrobe she’s been dusting so diligently only to find Soyeon standing in the middle of the room, holding a huge, fade yellow towel in her hand.
“What is that?”
“What do you mean? It’s a towel, dummy,” Soyeon rolled her eyes and approached the other, holding up the textile. “But it’s a special one. It has my name on it. So use this to shower from now on, and it’ll almost feel like you’re rubbing yourself against me,” she giggled and winked, eliciting an eyeroll from Eunjung.
“If a towel could replace you so easily, why would I still be with you?” she said but took the towel nonetheless, only to throw it aside and wrap her arms around Soyeon’s waist, quickly pulling her close.
“True, true. No one can replace me, am I right~~?” Soyeon blinked innocently, sticking out her tongue at her girlfriend who took advantage and pressed her lips against the girl’s hard, but slowly, tasting…)
Eunjung shakes her head, the towel falling out of her hands and she stands up, leaving the bathroom in an instant as memories rush her mind, mercilessly gnawing on her thoughts and nerves and she feels the pain no one ever should; it’s not even physical, but it damn feels like it was and her chest tightens, and with no one there to comfort her and lay her head on the paining spot, it keeps tightening.
Then again, if she was here for her, there wouldn’t be a need for any heartbreak to be healed.
*
Sometimes, it hurts less.
In times like this, when she realizes how wrong their relationship was ever since it started, it’s a little bit easier to accept its end. The twelve years big age-gap, the fact that she’s from a poor family and Soyeon’s not, or how different they’ve always been, all these things should’ve been hints for the two that they should never even think of this whole relationship to begin with.
But that was the point, the main reason that blinded them so they never considered how bad things could turn out to be, it was there and it overpowered every other factors that seemed like pitty-petty details no one should ever care for; the love they felt for each other.
Sometimes, Eunjung wonders if it’s still there, somewhere, hidden behind thousands of kilometers and childish doubts.
*
“What’s up with your ex-girlfriend?” Her friend asks, casually, but Eunjung hears the hesitance in her tone. Her friend knows exactly she doesn’t like talking about Soyeon, so why the hell does she still ask? “You know, the high schooler.”
“I know perfectly who you’re talking about,” Eunjung says, being a little bit harsher on Jiyeon than she meant to. She lets out a shaky breath and runs her fingers through her short, dark brown locks and shrugs. “I don’t know. Haven’t talked to her since.”
“Do you miss her?”
Eunjung looks up, shooting Jiyeon a glance. She wants to say something witty, or sarcastic, or both, something that would mask up how much she actually wishes Soyeon was there to prepare breakfast for her (even though she never succeeded in making anything else but cereal) or make a cup of coffee (her coffee was terrible, but Eunjung couldn’t care less) or as someone to cuddle when insomnia kicks in.
But instead, she just says, “Yes,” and Jiyeon doesn’t ask more.
*
When she glances at the name on the screen of her phone, at first, she doesn’t want to believe it.
So she ignores the call that’s supposed to be from someone who stopped being part of her life two months ago but she regrets as soon as the phone doesn’t ring anymore.
“Way to ruin your one chance, Eunjung,” she murmurs to herself as she stares at the name “Soyeon” under the “missed calls” tab.
*
Two days has passed and she still hasn’t found the courage to call Soyeon back; and she didn’t call again.
Of course she didn’t.
She probably needed just as much of guts to call in the first place, if not more, since she also had to be the first to call; and that was probably even more frightening than making the action itself.
But she loses it that night and she reaches for the phone, dialing without thinking and even though it’s past 2AM, she knows she has to let Soyeon know that at least, she tried.
It’s much to her surprise when the voice she missed so much murmurs a soft, somewhat tired “hello?” after two rings and Eunjung feels like her heart stops for a minute. Her lips part, bottom one trembling, her hands also shaking and she almost drops her phone, but she braces herself. It’s not like there’s anything to lose, is there?
“Soyeon?”
The line goes silent for a while and Eunjung hears nothing but the heavy and rapid thumps of her heart beating and she waits.
“Hi, Eunjung.”
Eunjung lets out the breath she didn’t even realize she was holding and smiles. It’s a genuine one, coming from the bottom of her heart and she has to suppress a chuckle.
“It’s been so long. How have you been doing?”
“Why are you up so late?” Soyeon asks instead of answering and Eunjung’s surprised.
“Could ask the same from you.”
“I wasn’t up until you woke me up.”
Eunjung is ready for an apologize when suddenly, she frowns.
“No, you were awake. You rarely ever wake up to anything, not even your alarm, and you answered my call just after two rings.”
She can’t see it, but she swears that Soyeon smiles on the other side of the line.
“You just know me too well, don’t you?”
And that’s all they need for the words to flow. Eunjung asks about college and Soyeon answers happily and they start talking and suddenly sleeping is forgotten and they talk so much it’s almost half past 4 in the morning when Soyeon calls it a night and although there’s nothing she wants less but to say goodbye, Eunjung agrees and they end the call.
*
They spend most of the following nights the same way and Eunjung almost thinks it feels the same as if Soyeon was right next to her. Of course, she’s in a country on a completely different continent, so it can’t be the same.
But one day, she accidentally lets a quiet “I miss you” fall from her lips and when it’s followed by an “I miss you, too” from the other side of the line, Eunjung becomes the happiest person on Earth.
*
When she finally sets up the last piece of Christmas decoration, she feels both relieved and accomplished.
Christmas had always been something she was waiting for so eagerly; it had been one of her favorite holidays where she would spend most time with her family and friends and eat a lot of delicious dishes, even get presents from people she treasures the most.
Not anymore. This is her first Christmas without Soyeon and she couldn’t feel less motivated for the entire holiday.
She wipes the back of her hand across her forehead to get rid of the imaginary sweatdrops when suddenly, the familiar clicking sound of an opening door and she turns around, wearing a way too obviously confused look on her face.
“Who…”
If there had been any decorations left in her hands, she would’ve probably dropped them on the floor by now.
“Surprise,” Soyeon allows a small, somewhat uncomfortable smile as she stands in the door, a huge suitcase lying next to her.
“What are you doing here?” Eunjung breathes, still completely stunned by the sudden appearance and she’s shaking, she’s shaking so hard she fears that Soyeon will notice.
She has already noticed.
“I just thought…” Soyeon starts, but it’s obvious that the reason she was about to come up with was no truth so she just shrugs. “I just hope you don’t mind…”
“How could I possibly mind it?” is all she says before Eunjung starts running and Soyeon does the same and they collide in a tight, secure hug, which none of them wants to end and they are out of breath but they don’t let go and Eunjung feels something burning in her eyes before she realizes she’s crying and when the same feeling is sensed at the nape of her neck, she knows Soyeon is crying, too.
“I’m sorry I left so suddenly, leaving you here with doubts,” Soyeon murmurs and pulls away, looking Eunjung in the eye. “It was silly of me, and I would love to blame it on my immaturity but we all know I’ve always been the mature one…”
Eunjung gently slaps Soyeon’s shoulder and they both giggle. “Shut up, Ms. Perfectly Imperfect.”
“I just…” Soyeon licks her bottom lip and Eunjung can’t help but stare. “I have to go back to college in three weeks, but… can we… maybe…”
“Yes,” Eunjung interrupts and shuts the younger up with a kiss. Soyeon kisses back immediately, her arms wrapping around the older before she breaks the moment and nudges her face in the crook of Eunjung’s neck.
“Let’s make it the best three weeks.”
Eunjung smiles lightly and nods, closing her eyes. “Let’s.”
group: t-ara
pairing: soyeon/eunjung
length: ~1800w
“This will be for the best,” are the last words slipping past the lips she’s graced so many times in the past few months before the love of her existence steps out of the room - and with that, her life.
And for the millionth time since their relationship was ruined, she wonders where things went so wrong.
*
She arrives home from work three hours later than she’s supposed to due to some extra errands she had to run (as a newbie, she had to sacrifice a lot of things to keep her job; one crucial one being free time) and she immediately collapses on the couch, head buried in a pillow as she fights the urge to fall asleep right there, right in that second. She gets up, eventually, a deep sigh being the only evidence for her fatigue as she waddles over to the bathroom to wash her face with some cold water (it helps her wake up) and brush her teeth (she probably should stop drinking so much coffee) and she almost trips over a pile of dirty towels lying carelessly on the floor. She picks them up and opens the washing machine to throw them all inside when her eyes catch the glimpse of two syllables she’s been dreading to see if connected in one word and albeit so, she still reaches to pull the towel printed with the name “Soyeon” on it out of the bunch.
(“Eunjung! Jungie~ Yah, where are you? I got you something!”
Eunjung peeked her head from behind the wardrobe she’s been dusting so diligently only to find Soyeon standing in the middle of the room, holding a huge, fade yellow towel in her hand.
“What is that?”
“What do you mean? It’s a towel, dummy,” Soyeon rolled her eyes and approached the other, holding up the textile. “But it’s a special one. It has my name on it. So use this to shower from now on, and it’ll almost feel like you’re rubbing yourself against me,” she giggled and winked, eliciting an eyeroll from Eunjung.
“If a towel could replace you so easily, why would I still be with you?” she said but took the towel nonetheless, only to throw it aside and wrap her arms around Soyeon’s waist, quickly pulling her close.
“True, true. No one can replace me, am I right~~?” Soyeon blinked innocently, sticking out her tongue at her girlfriend who took advantage and pressed her lips against the girl’s hard, but slowly, tasting…)
Eunjung shakes her head, the towel falling out of her hands and she stands up, leaving the bathroom in an instant as memories rush her mind, mercilessly gnawing on her thoughts and nerves and she feels the pain no one ever should; it’s not even physical, but it damn feels like it was and her chest tightens, and with no one there to comfort her and lay her head on the paining spot, it keeps tightening.
Then again, if she was here for her, there wouldn’t be a need for any heartbreak to be healed.
*
Sometimes, it hurts less.
In times like this, when she realizes how wrong their relationship was ever since it started, it’s a little bit easier to accept its end. The twelve years big age-gap, the fact that she’s from a poor family and Soyeon’s not, or how different they’ve always been, all these things should’ve been hints for the two that they should never even think of this whole relationship to begin with.
But that was the point, the main reason that blinded them so they never considered how bad things could turn out to be, it was there and it overpowered every other factors that seemed like pitty-petty details no one should ever care for; the love they felt for each other.
Sometimes, Eunjung wonders if it’s still there, somewhere, hidden behind thousands of kilometers and childish doubts.
*
“What’s up with your ex-girlfriend?” Her friend asks, casually, but Eunjung hears the hesitance in her tone. Her friend knows exactly she doesn’t like talking about Soyeon, so why the hell does she still ask? “You know, the high schooler.”
“I know perfectly who you’re talking about,” Eunjung says, being a little bit harsher on Jiyeon than she meant to. She lets out a shaky breath and runs her fingers through her short, dark brown locks and shrugs. “I don’t know. Haven’t talked to her since.”
“Do you miss her?”
Eunjung looks up, shooting Jiyeon a glance. She wants to say something witty, or sarcastic, or both, something that would mask up how much she actually wishes Soyeon was there to prepare breakfast for her (even though she never succeeded in making anything else but cereal) or make a cup of coffee (her coffee was terrible, but Eunjung couldn’t care less) or as someone to cuddle when insomnia kicks in.
But instead, she just says, “Yes,” and Jiyeon doesn’t ask more.
*
When she glances at the name on the screen of her phone, at first, she doesn’t want to believe it.
So she ignores the call that’s supposed to be from someone who stopped being part of her life two months ago but she regrets as soon as the phone doesn’t ring anymore.
“Way to ruin your one chance, Eunjung,” she murmurs to herself as she stares at the name “Soyeon” under the “missed calls” tab.
*
Two days has passed and she still hasn’t found the courage to call Soyeon back; and she didn’t call again.
Of course she didn’t.
She probably needed just as much of guts to call in the first place, if not more, since she also had to be the first to call; and that was probably even more frightening than making the action itself.
But she loses it that night and she reaches for the phone, dialing without thinking and even though it’s past 2AM, she knows she has to let Soyeon know that at least, she tried.
It’s much to her surprise when the voice she missed so much murmurs a soft, somewhat tired “hello?” after two rings and Eunjung feels like her heart stops for a minute. Her lips part, bottom one trembling, her hands also shaking and she almost drops her phone, but she braces herself. It’s not like there’s anything to lose, is there?
“Soyeon?”
The line goes silent for a while and Eunjung hears nothing but the heavy and rapid thumps of her heart beating and she waits.
“Hi, Eunjung.”
Eunjung lets out the breath she didn’t even realize she was holding and smiles. It’s a genuine one, coming from the bottom of her heart and she has to suppress a chuckle.
“It’s been so long. How have you been doing?”
“Why are you up so late?” Soyeon asks instead of answering and Eunjung’s surprised.
“Could ask the same from you.”
“I wasn’t up until you woke me up.”
Eunjung is ready for an apologize when suddenly, she frowns.
“No, you were awake. You rarely ever wake up to anything, not even your alarm, and you answered my call just after two rings.”
She can’t see it, but she swears that Soyeon smiles on the other side of the line.
“You just know me too well, don’t you?”
And that’s all they need for the words to flow. Eunjung asks about college and Soyeon answers happily and they start talking and suddenly sleeping is forgotten and they talk so much it’s almost half past 4 in the morning when Soyeon calls it a night and although there’s nothing she wants less but to say goodbye, Eunjung agrees and they end the call.
*
They spend most of the following nights the same way and Eunjung almost thinks it feels the same as if Soyeon was right next to her. Of course, she’s in a country on a completely different continent, so it can’t be the same.
But one day, she accidentally lets a quiet “I miss you” fall from her lips and when it’s followed by an “I miss you, too” from the other side of the line, Eunjung becomes the happiest person on Earth.
*
When she finally sets up the last piece of Christmas decoration, she feels both relieved and accomplished.
Christmas had always been something she was waiting for so eagerly; it had been one of her favorite holidays where she would spend most time with her family and friends and eat a lot of delicious dishes, even get presents from people she treasures the most.
Not anymore. This is her first Christmas without Soyeon and she couldn’t feel less motivated for the entire holiday.
She wipes the back of her hand across her forehead to get rid of the imaginary sweatdrops when suddenly, the familiar clicking sound of an opening door and she turns around, wearing a way too obviously confused look on her face.
“Who…”
If there had been any decorations left in her hands, she would’ve probably dropped them on the floor by now.
“Surprise,” Soyeon allows a small, somewhat uncomfortable smile as she stands in the door, a huge suitcase lying next to her.
“What are you doing here?” Eunjung breathes, still completely stunned by the sudden appearance and she’s shaking, she’s shaking so hard she fears that Soyeon will notice.
She has already noticed.
“I just thought…” Soyeon starts, but it’s obvious that the reason she was about to come up with was no truth so she just shrugs. “I just hope you don’t mind…”
“How could I possibly mind it?” is all she says before Eunjung starts running and Soyeon does the same and they collide in a tight, secure hug, which none of them wants to end and they are out of breath but they don’t let go and Eunjung feels something burning in her eyes before she realizes she’s crying and when the same feeling is sensed at the nape of her neck, she knows Soyeon is crying, too.
“I’m sorry I left so suddenly, leaving you here with doubts,” Soyeon murmurs and pulls away, looking Eunjung in the eye. “It was silly of me, and I would love to blame it on my immaturity but we all know I’ve always been the mature one…”
Eunjung gently slaps Soyeon’s shoulder and they both giggle. “Shut up, Ms. Perfectly Imperfect.”
“I just…” Soyeon licks her bottom lip and Eunjung can’t help but stare. “I have to go back to college in three weeks, but… can we… maybe…”
“Yes,” Eunjung interrupts and shuts the younger up with a kiss. Soyeon kisses back immediately, her arms wrapping around the older before she breaks the moment and nudges her face in the crook of Eunjung’s neck.
“Let’s make it the best three weeks.”
Eunjung smiles lightly and nods, closing her eyes. “Let’s.”