how to start again (ske48, matsui/matsui)
how to start again
group: ske48
pairing: wmatsui
length: ~5500w
It’s been exactly one year and she’s feeling better.
She can’t say that she’s fine, though; no, definitely not fine, but she no longer sleeps and wakes with wet cheeks and husky voice from the previous night’s screams. It doesn’t take her nearly an hour to comfort herself enough to get out of bed and she doesn’t have to keep that one photo frame on her nightstand with its picture facing the surface so she wouldn’t see it. She’s already able to go to that restaurant they’ve always used to go and which was her favorite without breaking out in an uncontrollable sob right at the entrance.
The pain is gradually becoming (more) bearable, but Rena knows that the wound Airi’s death had caused will never fully heal.
She wakes up knowing perfectly that it’s the same day on which a year ago Airi would whisper her last words to her. “Be happy,” she would say and Rena would cry, staring at her girlfriend with blurred vision. “Find someone else and be happy,” she would say and Rena would shake her head violently, refusing everything Airi would say.
Rena lifts her wrist and takes a look at the words tattooed on her skin. The cursive letters have now almost completely faded but it doesn’t matter because Rena remembers every one of them. “Are you going to eat that last gyouza?” is what the words said when they were still visible and is what had also left Airi’s lips when they had first met. She remembers clearly how she had thought all this soulmate-thingy was just pure bullshit, a marketing trick, nothing else.
But then this girl, this rather eccentric-looking girl with her half-shaved raven hair and strangely moving eyebrows said the same exact words that were tattooed on her wrist and three months later they were together. Rena’s reply to that question was a simple “No, you can have it”, but it was more than enough for the both of them to stare at each other with fallen jaws, quick glances stolen at each other’s wrists until the surprise turned into cheery happiness.
Soulmates were meant to be together. No one has told Rena that there would be a possibility of being separated. No one has told her that once it’s all said and done, a tragedy could come and break them apart.
But she decides that she can no longer spend her days with grieving; Airi wouldn’t want that, after all. She would want her to be happy, after all.
Besides, she’s having a job interview today.
There’s a somewhat morbid half-smile apparent on her face everytime she remembers that. A job interview… how silly. Having grown up as the heir to a millionaire with a well-faring company, Rena has never thought that once she would feel the need to find a job.
And, well, she doesn’t feel like that now, either; it’s just something she believes would help her go on. And also gain her some experience, which will definitely come in handy in the future, no?
She’s not particularly nervous when she steps into the office, nor does she feel like fainting or has tiny sweat drops decorating her forehead like people normally would. It would be a lie to say that she was perfectly calm, though; there’s some sort of mild anticipation mixed with excitement sparking up inside her and she welcomes the feeling, not having felt it for so long she almost forgot what effect it had.
There are only two others waiting in the same room as her, probably for the interview as well; one woman and one man. Rena mostly ignores them, trying with all she’s got to shut out the little bit masculine, rather irritating voice of the other woman who seems to be someone who just simply can’t keep quiet. She catches a few words, all of them which aim to convince the man sitting next to the woman that he would probably fail the audition and that she would be the one to get the job because she’s been in the field for approximately three years now and has all the experience while no one else here doesn’t (Rena believes she also belongs to the “no one else here” category but she can’t really argue because she really does not have any experience whatsoever. Scratch that, she’s not even interested in fashion.).
Minutes pass by, maybe an hour, even, when a secretary-looking woman opens the door to the main office and comes out, glancing around just for one second before humming (uncertainty? disappointment? content?) and going back. Rena has to heave a sigh because the waiting’s becoming a bit too long and although she’s known for her patience, she now thinks this is just a waste of time. She won’t get the job anyway and now she wonders why she thought that wanting to be a journalist for a fashion magazine was a good idea to begin with. Surely, she loves writing, it’s her passion, and she’s always wanted to try being a journalist, but a fashion magazine?
Then again, it would be exciting-and truth to be told, Rena would really need some thrill in her life.
They call them in one by one, Rena being called in second and the panic she proudly believed was nonexistent in her awakens the instant she enters the office and is faced with her (supposedly) boss, who looks a lot younger and less frightening than what she had first expected.
But looks can be deceiving.
And that sentence certainly proves to be true when the woman starts speaking and Rena’s surprised with an extremely high-pitched voice (it’s almost unbelievable) that albeit her boss is somewhat cute, does not suit her at all, especially someone in such a high rank. It’s so amusing that Rena almost has to deal with muffling a chuckle.
“…my name is Yamada Nana and I’m the editor-in-chief of Sapphire, as you probably already know.”
Rena almost spells a “No” but she keeps quiet.
“The basic idea of this interview would’ve been for me to choose two potential young journalists who would be adequate for the job but considering the low amount of applicants and the complete incompetence of the first applicant, I’ve already made my decision.”
Rena furrows her eyebrows ever-so-slightly as confusion arises, leaving her in doubts. So that means she’s one of the chosen ones?
Yamada tucks a small bundle of chestnut brown hair behind her ear and wastes a few seconds reading some sort of paper laid out on the table before looking up. “Taking everything into account, then, congratulations, you’re allowed for a one week trial at the magazine to prove your worth as a journalist.”
Rena has no idea how these things go with normal people, but there’s no overwhelming happiness or any huge waves of relief washing over her when she hears that. All she does is just a quick nod of her head and a small smile followed by a clumsy question regarding “what now”, and her potential boss tells her all the details. She stars at 6 am tomorrow, and she’d better be here in time or she’ll lose immediately. She should expect to get a few tasks to finish within different periods of time and also the privilege to write an article for one of the sections in the next month’s magazine.
She’s excused after she’s been told everything and Rena leaves the office just as if she was leaving the cinemas, casually, and with a small collection of doubts piling up. Then they call the other (very loud) woman in, and she realizes that she would have to compete with her in the following two weeks.
A tired sigh tears up from her throat.
*
Thankfully, the unsettling absence of positive emotions yesterday is soon replaced with nervousness and mild enthusiasm as Rena hurriedly gets ready for work in the following morning. She calms herself by saying that everything will go well and that she hasn’t stayed up until 1 am hiding behind fashion magazines for nothing.
She arrives in the company building two minutes early, thanks god, but of course, the other girl is already there, dressed in a perfectly white blouse and neat, black pantsuit and as Rena looks down on her faint yellow, peter pan collared shirt and black pencil skirt, she wonders if she has dressed appropriately for a job like this.
What she notices first, though, is that the other girl just simply can’t keep her eyes off of her, and it’s not the admiring type of look little girls would shoot at senpais but the scornful, “I’m-much-better-than-you” type that sends a shiver down Rena’s spine.
She almost attempts to initiate conversation, but the moment Rena’s lips part, she’s being shot another contemptuous look. So she ends up pouting instead.
A secretary arrives a few minutes after 6 and both girls are led into an empty office with two desks relatively close to each other but the computers facing away from each other so that both of them would be able to work peacefully. The secretary drops a huge pile of papers in the arms of both and then leaves them there without a word. Rena steals a glance at the other girl but she doesn’t look half as puzzled as she herself does so she doesn’t even bother.
The given tasks are pretty much a piece of cake; organizing past articles into the proper categories and listing them by issues and similar ones to that. Rena finishes them quite quickly so she soon has the time to look at which corner of the magazine she’s been given: “Do’s and Don’t’s” of fashion and Rena purses up her lips in thought, thinking that it’s one of the better sections she could get. It can’t be that hard to see what fashion trends look good and which are extremely taboo, right?
There’s a short coffee break at around noon so the other girl (whose name she still doesn’t know) emerges from behind her computer and leaves the office. Rena quirks an eyebrow because although she didn’t really expect her to out of her way and maybe ask her if she wanted some coffee, she still finds it a bit rude.
The girl returns soon with a cup of steaming wonder and its scent buries itself deep within Rena’s nostrils until she has to stand up and head for a cup as well-
That would be, if the other girl didn’t stop her.
“You’re doing this for nothing, you know,” she says, piercing her eyes into Rena’s own as she speaks. “You’re going to lose anyway. Even if you were better than me - something which I’m one-hundred percent sure is not the case -, I would still get the job. And I will. I worked hard for this-so don’t think some sort of wannabe “I’m-going-to-change-the-world” journalist can take this away from me.”
For long seconds, Rena doesn’t do anything but stare, trying to decipher and process the other’s words, to no avail.
Where the heck did that come from?
“Fuck you,” Rena suddenly blurts out, and the other girl’s face turns pale at once, an unreadable expression drawing itself upon her features. Surprise? Shock? Confusion?
“Oh…” the girl says and Rena notices the hidden glance the other tries to take at her wrist and she quickly hides her hands behind her back; she herself doesn’t quite know the reason for it.
“Yeah,” Rena nods, averting her gaze. “You’re not scaring me,” she murmurs and then turns around to get her well-deserved coffee, graced with a smug smile on her face and a newly found determination.
*
Actually, what Rena had thought would happen, doesn’t; Jurina (as the girl finally introduced herself) doesn’t treat her worse since that strange, rather unfriendly conversation they had the other day, but instead, better. Rena doesn’t know why Jurina suddenly started trying to befriend her (okay, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, though; let’s say, be nice to her), but she can certainly see her try and Rena doesn’t see why she should reject that. They don’t talk a lot, but Jurina sometimes asks Rena how she’s doing with her tasks and Rena would politely reply something then do the same a few hours later. Sometimes, Jurina goes out for coffee and brings a cup for Rena, even when she’s not asking for it and sometimes Rena would share the bento she herself had prepared with her (Jurina always praises her for them).
And work? It goes more or less smoothly, however, there are a few aspects Rena has overlooked and thought would be the easiest when they proved to be the exact opposite; it’s not a surprise anymore for her to stay up late with a bunch of fashion magazines on her bed and another bunch of fashion-related tabs opened in her browser, and yet, her knowledge is still not enough and just outright ridiculous compared to Jurina’s; she admires the composed, concentrated way she’s doing her job (as she sometimes sees it when she steals a glance at her side of the office) and wishes it was this easy for her as well. Then again, she always reminds herself, it was the path she took, knowing that she has no experience and yet she still decided to pursue it, so she might as well just keep going. It’s not like the ad ever mentioned the need of having previous experience, so she surely had a chance, didn’t she?
Sometimes, Rena wishes Airi would be here. She’s always been much more into fashion than Rena.
On the third day, just a few minutes after their working hours end, Jurina waits for her in front of the restroom’s door.
“Hey, wanna go somewhere?” she asks, eyes wrinkling at the corners and a small dimple framing her cheek.
But the question catches Rena off guard so instead of appreciating the other’s cheerfulness, she just furrows her brows.
“What?”
The smile on Jurina’s face fades a little bit and confusion takes over, followed by a sheepish chuckle and averted eyes. “I mean, go eat something or just take a walk or anything, really.”
“Oh,” Rena suddenly understands, and she nods, smiling a little. “Sure, why not. Where do you want to go?”
“Oh, I can choose?” Jurina’s eyes sparkle again as she taps her chin with a finger lightly. “Mhm, where to go, where to go… How about we go to the amusement park?”
Rena frowns a little. “I haven’t been to one in two years.”
Jurina claps her hands and raises an eyebrow. “See? One more reason to go!”
Rena hesitates a bit before shrugging. “Okay, I mean, why not.”
Jurina grins widely and nods. “Awesome! Where should we meet and when?”
“Uhm…” Rena takes a quick glance at her watch (damn, it flipped over again) and at the same time she looks up to reply, Jurina’s expression suddenly changes.
“Is there something wrong?” she asks and Jurina looks up, frowning.
“Actually, is it okay if we go on another day?”
What’s with the sudden change?
Rena frowns as well but shrugs. “Sure, no problem.”
“Okay,” Jurina says and flashes an apologetic (but obviously faked) smile. “I’m sorry. See you tomorrow!” And she turns around, disappearing from Rena’s vision faster than she can snap out of her surprise.
*
Even when she’s already at home and has locked the door, Rena is still wondering what the abrupt change in Jurina’s behavior originated from.
She puts down her shoulder bag on the coffee table seated in front of the couch and then plops down on the said piece of furniture, kicking her heels off of her feet and pulling her legs up, fingers reaching to fidget with her watch.
Her watch.
She realizes as she loosens up the strap so she could take it off and recalls how the change happened when she took a look at her watch to know what time would be best for them to meet up.
It wasn’t her watch, but the tattoo apparent on the same wrist.
That’s what she believes and as she tries to think back of the first time Jurina’s behavior changed rapidly (the infamous “fuck you” moment) and as she ponders, she feels the different pieces of the mystery gathering and gluing themselves to each other.
But the realization is not very pleasant. If she’s right-if her theory is indeed true, then she might has just fallen into one huge pile of mess.
Could it be possible that Jurina has the words “fuck you” tattooed on her wrist? That’s the only reasonable explanation for the way she’s been trying to be nice to Rena lately, because that would mean that Rena is her soulmate.
But Rena’s soulmate is Airi. It can’t be Jurina, not only because it’s been proven a thousand times that Airi is hers but also because the words that first left Jurina’s lips when she talked to Rena weren’t the same as the text she has on her wrist.
Even the mere thought gives her a mild headache and Rena closes her eyes, clenching her knuckles and then releasing.
But is that even possible? Rena has never thought that were would be people whose soulmate weren’t meant to be theirs as well. But then again, she would have also never thought that once her soulmate could be taken away.
Maybe that’s the reason? Maybe Airi was destined to die way before time and thus why Jurina’s soulmate is her? So that she could move on and forget Airi and be happy again?
That thought elicit a growl. That’s bullshit. There’s no such thing as predestination, we create our fate and we only.
But then again… why are there such things as soulmates if that statement is true?
“Damn it!” Rena cries out, punching the closest pillow. “Don’t you tell me that Airi’s fate was to die and leave me behind in misery from the beginning…” she hiccups, giving the pillow another punch. “Do not tell me that my fate was to fall in love with a girl who would die in mere a year and then suffer…”
A sob breaking out, Rena cuddles the pillow and squeezes it, close to her heart as if that could stop the pain that slowly overtakes her entire body and mind.
But it’s not the pillow that aids her in the end but she herself as a sudden idea drives her to reach for her phone and start texting, only to realize that she doesn’t have Jurina’s number.
Rena sighs.
*
“How about I take you out on dinner tonight?” Rena suggests in the first hour of work and manages to legit shock Jurina. That satisfies her, a little.
“You? And me?”
“And my wallet,” Rena tries to joke and although it’s an extremely cheap one, it makes Jurina laugh. So she smiles, too.
“Uhm, sure,” Jurina nods, the cheerfulness from the previous day returning. “But if you’re trying to take me off my feet just so you would get the job… forget it.”
Rena rolls her eyes. “I’m trying to be friends. Isn’t it more fun to compete when we don’t hate each other?”
“Did we ever?”
She has a point. Rena slowly shakes her head. “No. But I did find you very rude on the first day, you know.”
“Sorry,” Jurina giggles as she places another pile of papers in a yellow folder. “I can be a bitch when it comes to defending things what matter to me.”
Rena understands. Once, back in time, she had had her own moments of going out of her way just to protect something dear to her. That something - someone - often being Airi.
“That’s fine,” Rena says with as much empathy in her voice as possible.
“But,” Jurina speaks up again, running her tongue across her bottom lip, “if you ever need help, I’ll be glad to lend you a hand. Being a pro at all this, you know.”
Rena has to roll her eyes again, but she’s smiling. “Thank you.” She takes a quick look at her computer screen showing an almost completely blank document page with only the title “Biggest Do’s and Don’t’s of This Summer” written on the top. “Actually, there’s something…”
*
The dinner goes better than expected; Rena doesn’t spill wine all over her deep crimson dress (or Jurina’s sea blue shirt) and neither do the typical awkward silences occur during the whole evening. Rena finds Jurina especially easy to talk to; even though she’s not the most talkative type and most of the time, she doesn’t know what to say or what topic to bring up, it’s not a problem next to Jurina who always manages to keep the conversation going whether she’s talking about her family or the intimacy of the fruit flies (yes, really). She also makes Rena laugh, something not many people has achieved ever since that day - basically zero, to be exact.
But what’s probably the best thing about Jurina is that she makes her forget about Airi and even though she feels guilt everytime she realizes that, she knows that Airi would want this. So she doesn’t regret any minute she’s spending talking to the girl with the medium-length, raven hair and the dimples.
The first longer silence comes after they leave the restaurant (the only thing Rena regrets because now her wallet literally weighs nothing) and they go for a walk next to the river. But it’s still not an awkward one; Rena thinks that this moment is more precious spent quietly rather than with talking and apparently Jurina agrees (either that, or she’s in deep thought).
“What happened to your soulmate, Rena?” Jurina’s question is sudden, and Rena doesn’t expect it. She looks at the other with eyebrows raised and almost replies with a demanding how do you know? but she realizes that it’s probably pretty obvious, considering her behavior and the fact that she’s basically on a date with someone else right now.
“She died,” Rena decides to be honest, hoping that Jurina wouldn’t sit for too long on the topic.
“I see,” Jurina replies with a curt nod and for some reason, Rena believes that she sees relief flash across her face. But that’s too morbid for her to believe so she just shakes her head.
Jurina doesn’t ask anything else and Rena is truly grateful.
*
Something keeps her awake that night (it’s probably the rapidly racing heart of hers but she would not admit that), and she rolls over and back in her bed for countless of times before she accepts her inability to sleep. She rolls over one more time only to reach for her phone and she scrolls through the contacts in her phone, soon finding one named “Jurina” and she starts typing almost immediately.
But her fingers freeze after one word (“hey”) and Rena wonders what actually she should be sending her. Especially at 2am. Jurina’s probably sleeping already-she would only see the message in the morning. Perhaps she should send her a short greeting.
But wait.
Why exactly does she feel the need to send her anything?
This inquiry frightens her a little, and she puts her phone down.
But she soon takes it in her hands again and after typing down a quick “Good morning!” (attaching an emoji just so it wouldn’t seem so serious), she sends the text and hopes that this is the right thing.
What she doesn’t expect is the intense buzzing of her phone and Rena has to smile while reading the answer.
[ text; ] Do you usually wake up at 2am? You surely are weird.
Instead of telling her the truth, Rena decides to play along.
[ text; ] Yes. But you like that, don’t you?
By the time she hits send, she already regrets it, realizing just how flirty that one text might sound to Jurina and she wishes that she could revoke it.
[ text; ] Are you still trying to manipulate my feelings so that you could get the job instead of me?
Rena rolls her eyes. As if she was truly interested in the job anyway.
[ text; ] No, I’m trying to make you fall for me so then I could break your heart and take another trophy.
What was she doing? As she looks at the texts she had sent, Rena feels like they’re from a completely different person.
[ text; ] (/ﾟДﾟ)/ !!!!! Damn it. Why didn’t I notice it before. Now I’m certainly doomed for life!!!
[ text; ] What do you mean?
[ text; ] Nothing, princess. Go to sleep.
Rena looks confusedly at the replies, not understanding them. And why was she just called a ‘princess’?
She suddenly feels too tired to argue or question further, so she just sends a quick “good night” text before trying to sleep again.
And this time, sleep comes for her.
*
They spend the following days together. One time they go to the labyrinth that’s been built only two months ago somewhere in the outskirts of the city and of course, Rena manages to get lost rather quickly. Jurina doesn’t tell her that she’s been there before, but it becomes pretty obvious after the successfully finds Rena at least four times and also scares her to the point where she almost faints but instead of worrying, Jurina always just laughs at her.
The next time Jurina takes her to a fashion show to help her get more familiar with the current trends, but honestly, Rena doesn’t enjoy it for not even a bit. Jurina probably takes note of that because in the first break, she suggests leaving and going somewhere else instead and Rena doesn’t object.
They end up in the park where they lie in the grass (which is fake, by the way, but it feels as if it was real; just doesn’t smell that nice) and stare at the few stars left sparkling in the blackness, their arms touching as they try to find Venus - to no avail.
Jurina rolls on her side and looks at Rena, tracing one finger down the other’s arm and she lets her. “Do you think this could work?”
Rena tilts her head, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion. “What could?”
“This,” Jurina looks at the finger trailing down Rena’s skin. “Us.”
“What is us?” Rena asks and wonders the same herself, trying to figure out if the shivers Jurina’s each touch induce mean something.
“I mean…” Jurina bites down on her bottom lip and props up an elbow. “I guess you’ve already figured out that you’re my soulmate…?”
Rena just nods.
“But I’m not yours.”
The way Jurina’s voice cracks at the end of the sentence feels like a smaller knife - or tweezers, maybe - is digging into her skin. She sits up, lacing her eyes into the other girl’s.
“But my soulmate is… no longer here,” Rena says and Jurina sits up, too. “And she told me to be happy.”
Jurina frowns. “So does that mean…”
“Maybe?” Rena murmurs, a light smile appearing in the corner of her lips. “We could try, at least. But you have to know that I still love Airi, regardless everything that happened.”
“That’s fine,” Jurina shakes her head, suddenly reaching for Rena’s hands and she intertwines their fingers, placing their joined hands in her lap. “I can understand that. And I don’t expect you to just suddenly forget her or anything. I just want a chance for happiness, too.”
“And I’m the source of that happiness?” Rena asks, her voice having a sarcastic tint to it. Jurina makes a face.
“Obviously, no. I just thought your strategy on how to cloud my perception of the world so that you would get the job was awesome, so I decided to take it up.”
Rena giggles. “You’re dumb.”
“But you like that, don’t you?”
Rena remembers their texting from the other night but instead of answering, she leans in and pecks Jurina’s lips. It’s a short, uncertain kiss; but it feels right, and when Jurina pulls her close for another, she doesn’t object to it.
*
The next day is when the results are announced, and Rena’s not nervous at all. She knows that the job will be Jurina’s - and she’s perfectly okay with that. It’s not like she enjoyed this one week anyway (well, except for their hang-out sessions with her girlfriend), but it was certainly a good experience, not to mention that she probably would have never met Jurina if it hadn’t been for this opportunity.
The girls are called in to the office together and they let go of each other’s hand when the door opens. Jurina’s a bit nervous, even though she tries to hide it with a few smiles shot here and there; but it’s obvious and Rena finds it amusing.
“So, it’s the end of the week,” Yamada Nana starts with a pair of glasses sitting on her nose. “I’m not going to take up much of your time. You both did well - almost reached the level of my expectation. But there’s still much to grow, so don’t get cocky now.”
Jurina’s body stiffens next to Rena and she wants to reach over to squeeze her hand, but she can’t. So she just shoots her a reassuring smile.
“If I wasn’t the future boss of one of you now, I would be joking with the fact how both of you have the same surname, but let’s drop that right now,” Yamada continues and Rena looks at her strangely. “Anyway, congratulations Matsui Rena, you’re a journalist at Sapphire starting from today.”
Rena and Jurina both freeze at the same time. Rena believes that she heard it wrong.
“Excuse me?”
Yamada looks at her from behind her glasses. “You have a problem with it?”
“No, she doesn’t,” Jurina suddenly interferes, cutting off Rena’s opportunity to talk. She stands up and bows to her almost boss. “Thank you for the opportunity, Miss Yamada.”
“Wait, Jurina!” Rena shouts after she turns around and heads out and her girlfriend stops. Rena looks back at her boss. “I don’t want to work here anymore, Miss Yamada. I’ve never been into fashion, to be honest - I just needed to find a way to bind my time and distract myself. I’m sorry for wasting your time and although it’s an honor that you chose me, this job doesn’t suit me.”
Yamada looks confused. “But your article is one of a professional. How do you explain that?”
Rena suddenly realizes where things went wrong, and she can’t help the relieved smile that curves her lips. “Ah, yes. Actually, Jurina helped me write it. She was the one whom I asked advice from and she was nice enough to help me. I believe that’s another reason why I don’t deserve this job.”
“Rena, please…” Jurina murmurs but Rena lifts a hand to interrupt her.
“Again, I apologize and thank you for the opportunity. It’s been a great experience.”
Yamada looks at Jurina, who stiffens at the rather piercing stare. “So that’s how it is. That’s why it was so hard to choose between the two of you - because both works were basically by the same person. What a waste,” she sighs and glances over at the monitor. “In that case, welcome to the magazine, Matsui Jurina.”
The happy smile that spreads along her girlfriend’s lips mean so much more to Rena than a stupid job would ever, so when she leaves the office, probably forever, she does so with an even wider smile on her face.
*
“I’m still a bit offended, though,” Jurina groans against Rena’s skin before leaving a kiss on her lips. “That they believed you were better than me.”
“We all know why that happened,” Rena says and threads her fingers through Jurina’s hair. “I’m in no way better than you, of course. Never will.”
“Of course not,” Jurina giggles and rolls on top of Rena, leaning down to capture her lips in another kiss. “Not in this, at the very least. You’re probably better than me in everything else.”
“Mhm, for example?”
Jurina thinks for a moment. “Well, let’s see. First of all, you cook better.”
“Just because I made you omelet the other day doesn’t mean I’m a good chef.”
“But I can’t even make an omelet, so it’s at least something,” Jurina rolls her eyes, cupping Rena’s face with both of her hands and brushing her thumbs against the soft skin. “Secondly, you managed to make me fall for you within just a couple of days.”
“Mhm, I did?” Rena asks, leaning into her girlfriend’s touch. “But didn’t you do the same to me?”
“Well, did I?” Jurina looks expectantly at the girl underneath, and after a brief pause, Rena nods and brings her lips to the other’s, just once more.
“Yes. Yes, you did.”
group: ske48
pairing: wmatsui
length: ~5500w
It’s been exactly one year and she’s feeling better.
She can’t say that she’s fine, though; no, definitely not fine, but she no longer sleeps and wakes with wet cheeks and husky voice from the previous night’s screams. It doesn’t take her nearly an hour to comfort herself enough to get out of bed and she doesn’t have to keep that one photo frame on her nightstand with its picture facing the surface so she wouldn’t see it. She’s already able to go to that restaurant they’ve always used to go and which was her favorite without breaking out in an uncontrollable sob right at the entrance.
The pain is gradually becoming (more) bearable, but Rena knows that the wound Airi’s death had caused will never fully heal.
She wakes up knowing perfectly that it’s the same day on which a year ago Airi would whisper her last words to her. “Be happy,” she would say and Rena would cry, staring at her girlfriend with blurred vision. “Find someone else and be happy,” she would say and Rena would shake her head violently, refusing everything Airi would say.
Rena lifts her wrist and takes a look at the words tattooed on her skin. The cursive letters have now almost completely faded but it doesn’t matter because Rena remembers every one of them. “Are you going to eat that last gyouza?” is what the words said when they were still visible and is what had also left Airi’s lips when they had first met. She remembers clearly how she had thought all this soulmate-thingy was just pure bullshit, a marketing trick, nothing else.
But then this girl, this rather eccentric-looking girl with her half-shaved raven hair and strangely moving eyebrows said the same exact words that were tattooed on her wrist and three months later they were together. Rena’s reply to that question was a simple “No, you can have it”, but it was more than enough for the both of them to stare at each other with fallen jaws, quick glances stolen at each other’s wrists until the surprise turned into cheery happiness.
Soulmates were meant to be together. No one has told Rena that there would be a possibility of being separated. No one has told her that once it’s all said and done, a tragedy could come and break them apart.
But she decides that she can no longer spend her days with grieving; Airi wouldn’t want that, after all. She would want her to be happy, after all.
Besides, she’s having a job interview today.
There’s a somewhat morbid half-smile apparent on her face everytime she remembers that. A job interview… how silly. Having grown up as the heir to a millionaire with a well-faring company, Rena has never thought that once she would feel the need to find a job.
And, well, she doesn’t feel like that now, either; it’s just something she believes would help her go on. And also gain her some experience, which will definitely come in handy in the future, no?
She’s not particularly nervous when she steps into the office, nor does she feel like fainting or has tiny sweat drops decorating her forehead like people normally would. It would be a lie to say that she was perfectly calm, though; there’s some sort of mild anticipation mixed with excitement sparking up inside her and she welcomes the feeling, not having felt it for so long she almost forgot what effect it had.
There are only two others waiting in the same room as her, probably for the interview as well; one woman and one man. Rena mostly ignores them, trying with all she’s got to shut out the little bit masculine, rather irritating voice of the other woman who seems to be someone who just simply can’t keep quiet. She catches a few words, all of them which aim to convince the man sitting next to the woman that he would probably fail the audition and that she would be the one to get the job because she’s been in the field for approximately three years now and has all the experience while no one else here doesn’t (Rena believes she also belongs to the “no one else here” category but she can’t really argue because she really does not have any experience whatsoever. Scratch that, she’s not even interested in fashion.).
Minutes pass by, maybe an hour, even, when a secretary-looking woman opens the door to the main office and comes out, glancing around just for one second before humming (uncertainty? disappointment? content?) and going back. Rena has to heave a sigh because the waiting’s becoming a bit too long and although she’s known for her patience, she now thinks this is just a waste of time. She won’t get the job anyway and now she wonders why she thought that wanting to be a journalist for a fashion magazine was a good idea to begin with. Surely, she loves writing, it’s her passion, and she’s always wanted to try being a journalist, but a fashion magazine?
Then again, it would be exciting-and truth to be told, Rena would really need some thrill in her life.
They call them in one by one, Rena being called in second and the panic she proudly believed was nonexistent in her awakens the instant she enters the office and is faced with her (supposedly) boss, who looks a lot younger and less frightening than what she had first expected.
But looks can be deceiving.
And that sentence certainly proves to be true when the woman starts speaking and Rena’s surprised with an extremely high-pitched voice (it’s almost unbelievable) that albeit her boss is somewhat cute, does not suit her at all, especially someone in such a high rank. It’s so amusing that Rena almost has to deal with muffling a chuckle.
“…my name is Yamada Nana and I’m the editor-in-chief of Sapphire, as you probably already know.”
Rena almost spells a “No” but she keeps quiet.
“The basic idea of this interview would’ve been for me to choose two potential young journalists who would be adequate for the job but considering the low amount of applicants and the complete incompetence of the first applicant, I’ve already made my decision.”
Rena furrows her eyebrows ever-so-slightly as confusion arises, leaving her in doubts. So that means she’s one of the chosen ones?
Yamada tucks a small bundle of chestnut brown hair behind her ear and wastes a few seconds reading some sort of paper laid out on the table before looking up. “Taking everything into account, then, congratulations, you’re allowed for a one week trial at the magazine to prove your worth as a journalist.”
Rena has no idea how these things go with normal people, but there’s no overwhelming happiness or any huge waves of relief washing over her when she hears that. All she does is just a quick nod of her head and a small smile followed by a clumsy question regarding “what now”, and her potential boss tells her all the details. She stars at 6 am tomorrow, and she’d better be here in time or she’ll lose immediately. She should expect to get a few tasks to finish within different periods of time and also the privilege to write an article for one of the sections in the next month’s magazine.
She’s excused after she’s been told everything and Rena leaves the office just as if she was leaving the cinemas, casually, and with a small collection of doubts piling up. Then they call the other (very loud) woman in, and she realizes that she would have to compete with her in the following two weeks.
A tired sigh tears up from her throat.
*
Thankfully, the unsettling absence of positive emotions yesterday is soon replaced with nervousness and mild enthusiasm as Rena hurriedly gets ready for work in the following morning. She calms herself by saying that everything will go well and that she hasn’t stayed up until 1 am hiding behind fashion magazines for nothing.
She arrives in the company building two minutes early, thanks god, but of course, the other girl is already there, dressed in a perfectly white blouse and neat, black pantsuit and as Rena looks down on her faint yellow, peter pan collared shirt and black pencil skirt, she wonders if she has dressed appropriately for a job like this.
What she notices first, though, is that the other girl just simply can’t keep her eyes off of her, and it’s not the admiring type of look little girls would shoot at senpais but the scornful, “I’m-much-better-than-you” type that sends a shiver down Rena’s spine.
She almost attempts to initiate conversation, but the moment Rena’s lips part, she’s being shot another contemptuous look. So she ends up pouting instead.
A secretary arrives a few minutes after 6 and both girls are led into an empty office with two desks relatively close to each other but the computers facing away from each other so that both of them would be able to work peacefully. The secretary drops a huge pile of papers in the arms of both and then leaves them there without a word. Rena steals a glance at the other girl but she doesn’t look half as puzzled as she herself does so she doesn’t even bother.
The given tasks are pretty much a piece of cake; organizing past articles into the proper categories and listing them by issues and similar ones to that. Rena finishes them quite quickly so she soon has the time to look at which corner of the magazine she’s been given: “Do’s and Don’t’s” of fashion and Rena purses up her lips in thought, thinking that it’s one of the better sections she could get. It can’t be that hard to see what fashion trends look good and which are extremely taboo, right?
There’s a short coffee break at around noon so the other girl (whose name she still doesn’t know) emerges from behind her computer and leaves the office. Rena quirks an eyebrow because although she didn’t really expect her to out of her way and maybe ask her if she wanted some coffee, she still finds it a bit rude.
The girl returns soon with a cup of steaming wonder and its scent buries itself deep within Rena’s nostrils until she has to stand up and head for a cup as well-
That would be, if the other girl didn’t stop her.
“You’re doing this for nothing, you know,” she says, piercing her eyes into Rena’s own as she speaks. “You’re going to lose anyway. Even if you were better than me - something which I’m one-hundred percent sure is not the case -, I would still get the job. And I will. I worked hard for this-so don’t think some sort of wannabe “I’m-going-to-change-the-world” journalist can take this away from me.”
For long seconds, Rena doesn’t do anything but stare, trying to decipher and process the other’s words, to no avail.
Where the heck did that come from?
“Fuck you,” Rena suddenly blurts out, and the other girl’s face turns pale at once, an unreadable expression drawing itself upon her features. Surprise? Shock? Confusion?
“Oh…” the girl says and Rena notices the hidden glance the other tries to take at her wrist and she quickly hides her hands behind her back; she herself doesn’t quite know the reason for it.
“Yeah,” Rena nods, averting her gaze. “You’re not scaring me,” she murmurs and then turns around to get her well-deserved coffee, graced with a smug smile on her face and a newly found determination.
*
Actually, what Rena had thought would happen, doesn’t; Jurina (as the girl finally introduced herself) doesn’t treat her worse since that strange, rather unfriendly conversation they had the other day, but instead, better. Rena doesn’t know why Jurina suddenly started trying to befriend her (okay, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, though; let’s say, be nice to her), but she can certainly see her try and Rena doesn’t see why she should reject that. They don’t talk a lot, but Jurina sometimes asks Rena how she’s doing with her tasks and Rena would politely reply something then do the same a few hours later. Sometimes, Jurina goes out for coffee and brings a cup for Rena, even when she’s not asking for it and sometimes Rena would share the bento she herself had prepared with her (Jurina always praises her for them).
And work? It goes more or less smoothly, however, there are a few aspects Rena has overlooked and thought would be the easiest when they proved to be the exact opposite; it’s not a surprise anymore for her to stay up late with a bunch of fashion magazines on her bed and another bunch of fashion-related tabs opened in her browser, and yet, her knowledge is still not enough and just outright ridiculous compared to Jurina’s; she admires the composed, concentrated way she’s doing her job (as she sometimes sees it when she steals a glance at her side of the office) and wishes it was this easy for her as well. Then again, she always reminds herself, it was the path she took, knowing that she has no experience and yet she still decided to pursue it, so she might as well just keep going. It’s not like the ad ever mentioned the need of having previous experience, so she surely had a chance, didn’t she?
Sometimes, Rena wishes Airi would be here. She’s always been much more into fashion than Rena.
On the third day, just a few minutes after their working hours end, Jurina waits for her in front of the restroom’s door.
“Hey, wanna go somewhere?” she asks, eyes wrinkling at the corners and a small dimple framing her cheek.
But the question catches Rena off guard so instead of appreciating the other’s cheerfulness, she just furrows her brows.
“What?”
The smile on Jurina’s face fades a little bit and confusion takes over, followed by a sheepish chuckle and averted eyes. “I mean, go eat something or just take a walk or anything, really.”
“Oh,” Rena suddenly understands, and she nods, smiling a little. “Sure, why not. Where do you want to go?”
“Oh, I can choose?” Jurina’s eyes sparkle again as she taps her chin with a finger lightly. “Mhm, where to go, where to go… How about we go to the amusement park?”
Rena frowns a little. “I haven’t been to one in two years.”
Jurina claps her hands and raises an eyebrow. “See? One more reason to go!”
Rena hesitates a bit before shrugging. “Okay, I mean, why not.”
Jurina grins widely and nods. “Awesome! Where should we meet and when?”
“Uhm…” Rena takes a quick glance at her watch (damn, it flipped over again) and at the same time she looks up to reply, Jurina’s expression suddenly changes.
“Is there something wrong?” she asks and Jurina looks up, frowning.
“Actually, is it okay if we go on another day?”
What’s with the sudden change?
Rena frowns as well but shrugs. “Sure, no problem.”
“Okay,” Jurina says and flashes an apologetic (but obviously faked) smile. “I’m sorry. See you tomorrow!” And she turns around, disappearing from Rena’s vision faster than she can snap out of her surprise.
*
Even when she’s already at home and has locked the door, Rena is still wondering what the abrupt change in Jurina’s behavior originated from.
She puts down her shoulder bag on the coffee table seated in front of the couch and then plops down on the said piece of furniture, kicking her heels off of her feet and pulling her legs up, fingers reaching to fidget with her watch.
Her watch.
She realizes as she loosens up the strap so she could take it off and recalls how the change happened when she took a look at her watch to know what time would be best for them to meet up.
It wasn’t her watch, but the tattoo apparent on the same wrist.
That’s what she believes and as she tries to think back of the first time Jurina’s behavior changed rapidly (the infamous “fuck you” moment) and as she ponders, she feels the different pieces of the mystery gathering and gluing themselves to each other.
But the realization is not very pleasant. If she’s right-if her theory is indeed true, then she might has just fallen into one huge pile of mess.
Could it be possible that Jurina has the words “fuck you” tattooed on her wrist? That’s the only reasonable explanation for the way she’s been trying to be nice to Rena lately, because that would mean that Rena is her soulmate.
But Rena’s soulmate is Airi. It can’t be Jurina, not only because it’s been proven a thousand times that Airi is hers but also because the words that first left Jurina’s lips when she talked to Rena weren’t the same as the text she has on her wrist.
Even the mere thought gives her a mild headache and Rena closes her eyes, clenching her knuckles and then releasing.
But is that even possible? Rena has never thought that were would be people whose soulmate weren’t meant to be theirs as well. But then again, she would have also never thought that once her soulmate could be taken away.
Maybe that’s the reason? Maybe Airi was destined to die way before time and thus why Jurina’s soulmate is her? So that she could move on and forget Airi and be happy again?
That thought elicit a growl. That’s bullshit. There’s no such thing as predestination, we create our fate and we only.
But then again… why are there such things as soulmates if that statement is true?
“Damn it!” Rena cries out, punching the closest pillow. “Don’t you tell me that Airi’s fate was to die and leave me behind in misery from the beginning…” she hiccups, giving the pillow another punch. “Do not tell me that my fate was to fall in love with a girl who would die in mere a year and then suffer…”
A sob breaking out, Rena cuddles the pillow and squeezes it, close to her heart as if that could stop the pain that slowly overtakes her entire body and mind.
But it’s not the pillow that aids her in the end but she herself as a sudden idea drives her to reach for her phone and start texting, only to realize that she doesn’t have Jurina’s number.
Rena sighs.
*
“How about I take you out on dinner tonight?” Rena suggests in the first hour of work and manages to legit shock Jurina. That satisfies her, a little.
“You? And me?”
“And my wallet,” Rena tries to joke and although it’s an extremely cheap one, it makes Jurina laugh. So she smiles, too.
“Uhm, sure,” Jurina nods, the cheerfulness from the previous day returning. “But if you’re trying to take me off my feet just so you would get the job… forget it.”
Rena rolls her eyes. “I’m trying to be friends. Isn’t it more fun to compete when we don’t hate each other?”
“Did we ever?”
She has a point. Rena slowly shakes her head. “No. But I did find you very rude on the first day, you know.”
“Sorry,” Jurina giggles as she places another pile of papers in a yellow folder. “I can be a bitch when it comes to defending things what matter to me.”
Rena understands. Once, back in time, she had had her own moments of going out of her way just to protect something dear to her. That something - someone - often being Airi.
“That’s fine,” Rena says with as much empathy in her voice as possible.
“But,” Jurina speaks up again, running her tongue across her bottom lip, “if you ever need help, I’ll be glad to lend you a hand. Being a pro at all this, you know.”
Rena has to roll her eyes again, but she’s smiling. “Thank you.” She takes a quick look at her computer screen showing an almost completely blank document page with only the title “Biggest Do’s and Don’t’s of This Summer” written on the top. “Actually, there’s something…”
*
The dinner goes better than expected; Rena doesn’t spill wine all over her deep crimson dress (or Jurina’s sea blue shirt) and neither do the typical awkward silences occur during the whole evening. Rena finds Jurina especially easy to talk to; even though she’s not the most talkative type and most of the time, she doesn’t know what to say or what topic to bring up, it’s not a problem next to Jurina who always manages to keep the conversation going whether she’s talking about her family or the intimacy of the fruit flies (yes, really). She also makes Rena laugh, something not many people has achieved ever since that day - basically zero, to be exact.
But what’s probably the best thing about Jurina is that she makes her forget about Airi and even though she feels guilt everytime she realizes that, she knows that Airi would want this. So she doesn’t regret any minute she’s spending talking to the girl with the medium-length, raven hair and the dimples.
The first longer silence comes after they leave the restaurant (the only thing Rena regrets because now her wallet literally weighs nothing) and they go for a walk next to the river. But it’s still not an awkward one; Rena thinks that this moment is more precious spent quietly rather than with talking and apparently Jurina agrees (either that, or she’s in deep thought).
“What happened to your soulmate, Rena?” Jurina’s question is sudden, and Rena doesn’t expect it. She looks at the other with eyebrows raised and almost replies with a demanding how do you know? but she realizes that it’s probably pretty obvious, considering her behavior and the fact that she’s basically on a date with someone else right now.
“She died,” Rena decides to be honest, hoping that Jurina wouldn’t sit for too long on the topic.
“I see,” Jurina replies with a curt nod and for some reason, Rena believes that she sees relief flash across her face. But that’s too morbid for her to believe so she just shakes her head.
Jurina doesn’t ask anything else and Rena is truly grateful.
*
Something keeps her awake that night (it’s probably the rapidly racing heart of hers but she would not admit that), and she rolls over and back in her bed for countless of times before she accepts her inability to sleep. She rolls over one more time only to reach for her phone and she scrolls through the contacts in her phone, soon finding one named “Jurina” and she starts typing almost immediately.
But her fingers freeze after one word (“hey”) and Rena wonders what actually she should be sending her. Especially at 2am. Jurina’s probably sleeping already-she would only see the message in the morning. Perhaps she should send her a short greeting.
But wait.
Why exactly does she feel the need to send her anything?
This inquiry frightens her a little, and she puts her phone down.
But she soon takes it in her hands again and after typing down a quick “Good morning!” (attaching an emoji just so it wouldn’t seem so serious), she sends the text and hopes that this is the right thing.
What she doesn’t expect is the intense buzzing of her phone and Rena has to smile while reading the answer.
[ text; ] Do you usually wake up at 2am? You surely are weird.
Instead of telling her the truth, Rena decides to play along.
[ text; ] Yes. But you like that, don’t you?
By the time she hits send, she already regrets it, realizing just how flirty that one text might sound to Jurina and she wishes that she could revoke it.
[ text; ] Are you still trying to manipulate my feelings so that you could get the job instead of me?
Rena rolls her eyes. As if she was truly interested in the job anyway.
[ text; ] No, I’m trying to make you fall for me so then I could break your heart and take another trophy.
What was she doing? As she looks at the texts she had sent, Rena feels like they’re from a completely different person.
[ text; ] (/ﾟДﾟ)/ !!!!! Damn it. Why didn’t I notice it before. Now I’m certainly doomed for life!!!
[ text; ] What do you mean?
[ text; ] Nothing, princess. Go to sleep.
Rena looks confusedly at the replies, not understanding them. And why was she just called a ‘princess’?
She suddenly feels too tired to argue or question further, so she just sends a quick “good night” text before trying to sleep again.
And this time, sleep comes for her.
*
They spend the following days together. One time they go to the labyrinth that’s been built only two months ago somewhere in the outskirts of the city and of course, Rena manages to get lost rather quickly. Jurina doesn’t tell her that she’s been there before, but it becomes pretty obvious after the successfully finds Rena at least four times and also scares her to the point where she almost faints but instead of worrying, Jurina always just laughs at her.
The next time Jurina takes her to a fashion show to help her get more familiar with the current trends, but honestly, Rena doesn’t enjoy it for not even a bit. Jurina probably takes note of that because in the first break, she suggests leaving and going somewhere else instead and Rena doesn’t object.
They end up in the park where they lie in the grass (which is fake, by the way, but it feels as if it was real; just doesn’t smell that nice) and stare at the few stars left sparkling in the blackness, their arms touching as they try to find Venus - to no avail.
Jurina rolls on her side and looks at Rena, tracing one finger down the other’s arm and she lets her. “Do you think this could work?”
Rena tilts her head, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion. “What could?”
“This,” Jurina looks at the finger trailing down Rena’s skin. “Us.”
“What is us?” Rena asks and wonders the same herself, trying to figure out if the shivers Jurina’s each touch induce mean something.
“I mean…” Jurina bites down on her bottom lip and props up an elbow. “I guess you’ve already figured out that you’re my soulmate…?”
Rena just nods.
“But I’m not yours.”
The way Jurina’s voice cracks at the end of the sentence feels like a smaller knife - or tweezers, maybe - is digging into her skin. She sits up, lacing her eyes into the other girl’s.
“But my soulmate is… no longer here,” Rena says and Jurina sits up, too. “And she told me to be happy.”
Jurina frowns. “So does that mean…”
“Maybe?” Rena murmurs, a light smile appearing in the corner of her lips. “We could try, at least. But you have to know that I still love Airi, regardless everything that happened.”
“That’s fine,” Jurina shakes her head, suddenly reaching for Rena’s hands and she intertwines their fingers, placing their joined hands in her lap. “I can understand that. And I don’t expect you to just suddenly forget her or anything. I just want a chance for happiness, too.”
“And I’m the source of that happiness?” Rena asks, her voice having a sarcastic tint to it. Jurina makes a face.
“Obviously, no. I just thought your strategy on how to cloud my perception of the world so that you would get the job was awesome, so I decided to take it up.”
Rena giggles. “You’re dumb.”
“But you like that, don’t you?”
Rena remembers their texting from the other night but instead of answering, she leans in and pecks Jurina’s lips. It’s a short, uncertain kiss; but it feels right, and when Jurina pulls her close for another, she doesn’t object to it.
*
The next day is when the results are announced, and Rena’s not nervous at all. She knows that the job will be Jurina’s - and she’s perfectly okay with that. It’s not like she enjoyed this one week anyway (well, except for their hang-out sessions with her girlfriend), but it was certainly a good experience, not to mention that she probably would have never met Jurina if it hadn’t been for this opportunity.
The girls are called in to the office together and they let go of each other’s hand when the door opens. Jurina’s a bit nervous, even though she tries to hide it with a few smiles shot here and there; but it’s obvious and Rena finds it amusing.
“So, it’s the end of the week,” Yamada Nana starts with a pair of glasses sitting on her nose. “I’m not going to take up much of your time. You both did well - almost reached the level of my expectation. But there’s still much to grow, so don’t get cocky now.”
Jurina’s body stiffens next to Rena and she wants to reach over to squeeze her hand, but she can’t. So she just shoots her a reassuring smile.
“If I wasn’t the future boss of one of you now, I would be joking with the fact how both of you have the same surname, but let’s drop that right now,” Yamada continues and Rena looks at her strangely. “Anyway, congratulations Matsui Rena, you’re a journalist at Sapphire starting from today.”
Rena and Jurina both freeze at the same time. Rena believes that she heard it wrong.
“Excuse me?”
Yamada looks at her from behind her glasses. “You have a problem with it?”
“No, she doesn’t,” Jurina suddenly interferes, cutting off Rena’s opportunity to talk. She stands up and bows to her almost boss. “Thank you for the opportunity, Miss Yamada.”
“Wait, Jurina!” Rena shouts after she turns around and heads out and her girlfriend stops. Rena looks back at her boss. “I don’t want to work here anymore, Miss Yamada. I’ve never been into fashion, to be honest - I just needed to find a way to bind my time and distract myself. I’m sorry for wasting your time and although it’s an honor that you chose me, this job doesn’t suit me.”
Yamada looks confused. “But your article is one of a professional. How do you explain that?”
Rena suddenly realizes where things went wrong, and she can’t help the relieved smile that curves her lips. “Ah, yes. Actually, Jurina helped me write it. She was the one whom I asked advice from and she was nice enough to help me. I believe that’s another reason why I don’t deserve this job.”
“Rena, please…” Jurina murmurs but Rena lifts a hand to interrupt her.
“Again, I apologize and thank you for the opportunity. It’s been a great experience.”
Yamada looks at Jurina, who stiffens at the rather piercing stare. “So that’s how it is. That’s why it was so hard to choose between the two of you - because both works were basically by the same person. What a waste,” she sighs and glances over at the monitor. “In that case, welcome to the magazine, Matsui Jurina.”
The happy smile that spreads along her girlfriend’s lips mean so much more to Rena than a stupid job would ever, so when she leaves the office, probably forever, she does so with an even wider smile on her face.
*
“I’m still a bit offended, though,” Jurina groans against Rena’s skin before leaving a kiss on her lips. “That they believed you were better than me.”
“We all know why that happened,” Rena says and threads her fingers through Jurina’s hair. “I’m in no way better than you, of course. Never will.”
“Of course not,” Jurina giggles and rolls on top of Rena, leaning down to capture her lips in another kiss. “Not in this, at the very least. You’re probably better than me in everything else.”
“Mhm, for example?”
Jurina thinks for a moment. “Well, let’s see. First of all, you cook better.”
“Just because I made you omelet the other day doesn’t mean I’m a good chef.”
“But I can’t even make an omelet, so it’s at least something,” Jurina rolls her eyes, cupping Rena’s face with both of her hands and brushing her thumbs against the soft skin. “Secondly, you managed to make me fall for you within just a couple of days.”
“Mhm, I did?” Rena asks, leaning into her girlfriend’s touch. “But didn’t you do the same to me?”
“Well, did I?” Jurina looks expectantly at the girl underneath, and after a brief pause, Rena nods and brings her lips to the other’s, just once more.
“Yes. Yes, you did.”