PDA
Title: PDA
Author: himawarixxsandz
Pairing: JoonHo (Joon/Seungho)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Joon thinks that he and Seungho are a little lacking in the PDA department.
A/N: We're back into Joon's mind again, and it's not much smarter than the last time we were there, but if it was smarter, we probably wouldn't like being in it so much XD. Kind of inspired by the fact that I was watching some JongKey fancams and it's like they are literally about to do it on camera wherever I see them, and then DooSeob is so real it's ridiculous although nowadays BEAST just kind of all whores on each other and that's fine, too ^-^. But yeah. This little fic is kind of me justifying why Joon and Seungho aren't having sex on camera like JongKey are.
01: Arm Around the Shoulders
Joon is a romantic. He believes in using all of the clichés he’s ever seen in old, romantic comedies and now that he has someone to use them on, he’s not going to hesitate a single bit. He’s going to fly head-on into the storm because he is Lee Joon and fearless and romantic like that.
His favorite cliché has always been how the guy will pretend to yawn and stretch his arms around the girl’s tiny shoulders and then the girl will snuggle in and then they’ll forget about the movie they are watching and then they will kiss and then they’ll have amazing, mind-blowing sex underneath the theater chairs and it will be spectacular.
So as he, Seungho, G.O., and Cheondoong are watching Saw for the fifth time that week, he fakes a yawn like only the best Hollywood actors can do and stretches his arm around Seungho’s shoulders.
It would’ve went perfectly and Joon would’ve had amazingly mind-blowing sex if it had not been for the fact that Seungho hadn’t chosen to turn to Joon at the precise moment where his arm is about to land on the leader’s shoulders because now Seungho looks confused. “What are you doing?” he asks Joon.
“Um-“ Joon thinks. “Stretching my arm?” he offers.
Seungho’s eyebrows furrow. “Are they cramping? You do work out a lot.” Joon is about to say that they aren’t and that Seungho is a complete idiot for not noticing one of the classics when Seungho taps Cheondoong on the shoulder and goes, “Sanghyun-ah, Nadia-shii taught you how to stretch people for cramps, right? Stretch Changsun-ah, his arms are hurting.”
“I’ll pause the movie,” G.O. says helpfully and Joon wants to throw a pillow at him.
“No,” Joon huffs, “really, I’m fine-“
But yeah, that’s how he ends up with his face against the sofa, arms pointing in a direction they really should not be pointing in with Cheondoong apologizing profusely over and over again as they wait for Nadia to arrive to set the angle of Joon’s limbs straight.
02: Holding Hands
Hand-holding, Joon thinks, is like the standard form of PDA. It’s not even really PDA. Third-graders hold hands. Babies hold hands. Everyone held hands. If earthworms had hands, they’d probably hold them, too.
And since everyone held hands, Joon thinks that it will be as easy as breathing to hold hands with Seungho. He holds hands with him all the time. They hold hands when they do the guy-hand-clasp-hug thing even though usually nowadays Joon incorporates a kiss somewhere in there. They hold hands when they are stretching each other before dance practice. They hold hands when one of them thrusts in and out of the other.
So with this logic, slipping his hand into Seungho’s while they are waiting for their waiting room to be opened should be even easier than breathing-it’s going to be as easy as blinking.
Except only a few seconds after he slips his hand into Seungho’s, the leader looks at him with blank eyes. “What?” Seungho says.
Joon blinks. “My hands are cold,” he says with a grin to suggest that his hands aren’t cold at all.
Unfortunately, Seungho is denser than Key’s hair after it has been styled which means that Seungho just blinks back. “Oh, well-“
“Do you need hot packs?” G.O. cuts in suddenly from behind the leader.
Seungho smiles his eye-disappearing, Yang Sunshine smile at Joon and says, “Yeah. Take some of Byunghee’s hot packs. Manager-hyung bought him like an entire box.” And without further ado, he takes his hand out of Joon’s and slaps a hot pack into the younger man’s hand.
Joon is convinced that this is the rest of MBLAQ’s payback to every time any of them ever walked in on him and Seungho having sex.
03: One For You, One For Me
In any classic Korean drama that no one can bear to watch with their eyes open because of vomit-inducing cuteness, the main couple always feeds each other food at one point or another. It happens in those dramas, and it happens on variety shows where boy idols have to pair up with girl idols and Joon’s been part of that a decent amount of times. He supposes in a way that it’s supposed to show the world that you care for that person enough to want them well-fed all the time, and you want their dietary needs before your own.
He knows that Seungho worries about all four of his dongsaengs getting the proper meals even when there’s no time in the day to eat a proper meal because of their schedules, and he knows that Seungho especially worries about Joon because his schedule is the most hectic and thus he expends the most energy working. Therefore, in theory-because Joon is a man of theories and he gets better and better with each passing theory-it should be terribly romantic if Joon shows Seungho and those who eat with them that he cares about Seungho’s daily dietary needs right back.
Unfortunately, that theory doesn’t really pertain to real life because Joon forgot that no one needs to ever worry about Yang Seungho getting the right amount of nutritional intake per day.
He forgot until he is sitting across Seungho, having dinner with the leader, Junhyung, and Yonghwa. Joon’s arm is outstretched with a piece of meat and kimchi and an onion all neatly clamped together between his chopsticks and this would have been the best theory ever if Seungho wasn’t already inhaling everything on his plate at the speed of light-it also doesn’t help that his cheeks are stretched out so far that it makes his face look like two mutated bumblebees have just stung him on either side.
“I’m not paying,” Yonghwa says, looking accusingly at Joon.
“Neither am I,” Junhyung says.
Joon gapes in outrage as the food between his chopsticks falls to the table. “Well-I’m not-what-this-pay-not-why-you-so mean-he’s-idol-fat-why-urgh,” he explains incredulously. He looks to Seungho for help because he’s the oldest hyung and should therefore at least ask for the other two to contribute money because that’s the nice thing to do.
Except Seungho doesn’t have eyes for anything else other than his bowl and chopsticks and what’s going in and out of it. “Hyung,” Joon says in despair.
Seungho finally looks up, and blinks. “Oh-Changsun-ah,” he muffles through a mouthful of who-knows-what-at-this-point, “Do you still want your dumplings?”
Joon sighs. “No, hyung. You can have them.”
The owner-ahjumma is starting to give them worried looks because Junhyung and Yonghwa are laughing too hard.
04: Couple Outfits
This, Joon knows, is a foolproof plan. There is absolutely positively no way this plan can go wrong because not only is it classic and romantic, but it can’t possibly go wrong because the sweatshirt is on him and the only way for it to go wrong is if he consciously pulls it off and there is no way that’s going to happen because Joon isn’t going to let it happen.
Plus, Seungho doesn’t really seem to mind wearing the sweatshirt that Joon has given him-they might match, but it’s nothing that the fans will really notice. Fans like it when idols wear the same clothes and it’s not like Joon made Seungho wear a wedding dress or something-it’s just a black sweatshirt with the same design that Joon’s has. It’s also -13 degrees in the stage that they are rehearsing in and Seungho isn’t someone who likes freezing to death.
Joon is in such a great mood that he doesn’t even mind going over the routine for the eighth time because the PD wants to try a different camera angle for G.O.’s one-shot. He’s in that great of a mood because half the day is over and nothing has gone wrong and when the fancams and fan photos come out, everyone will ship them and it will be official-just like Jonghyun and Key because they have fancams of them practically molesting each other and Joon is determined to work up to that level of commitment.
They are given a few minutes for a water break and Joon throws his arms around Seungho. The leader laughs, his breath visible in the frigid air, and Joon doesn’t even care that Seungho’s icy fingers are holding onto his hand as the younger man lifts him off the ground and pulls him away backstage.
“What?” Seungho says, still laughing and breathless from the rehearsal.
Joon just grins against the corner of Seungho’s jaw, going up to his lips. They kiss once, twice, and then Joon pulls away, his mouth still lingering slightly against the leader’s. “C’mon, hyung,” he says in a low voice and feels Seungho’s hands grip his waist. “Why’d you even ask?”
He hears Seungho’s breath hitch a little and leans in, his eyes closing but not before he catches a glimpse of the leader’s smile as their lips meet again, tongues curling in mouths, hands grasping underneath clothes, bodies bumping roughly against the pillars of the backstage curtains. Joon throws his head back and thinks that this is definitely a foolproof plan-the most brilliant plan ever-when Seungho gets on his knees and he feels the leader’s hands sliding down his sides-
“Hyung.”
Joon’s eyes snap open and Seungho stands up.
“Hyung,” Mir says, his arms folded tightly around himself in his thin long-sleeved shirt. “I-am-freezing.”
This cannot be happening.
“Oh,” Seungho says. He blinks, and then pulls off his sweatshirt and hands it over to the maknae.
This really cannot be happening.
“Thanks, hyung,” Mir says. He waves his hand as he turns to leave. “You can blow Changsun-hyung now.”
Joon watches the maknae go and says faintly, “I can’t believe you just did that.”
“What?” Seungho gets back down and starts unbuttoning Joon’s jeans.
“I can’t believe you just gave him the sweatshirt that I just gave you this morning,” he says incredulously, eyes still fixed on Mir’s retreating figure. Seungho lowers the front of Joon’s waistband and reaches into the younger man’s boxers.
“Well,” Seungho says, his hand at the base of Joon’s cock, “I’d be taking it off in a few minutes anyway.”
Joon considers this for a moment. “True,” he admits, right before Seungho takes him in one go and after that he can’t really consider anything.
05: Goodbye Kiss
Joon is starting to think that if his and Seungho’s relationship was a person, that person would be a hermit. He thinks it’s terribly unfair considering that Jonghyun and Key are more or less doing free porn on fancams and he and Seungho, at the most, have a fancam of them hugging. Key and Jonghyun’s fancams are like five minutes long, and he and Seungho only get fourteen seconds. Doojoon and Yoseob more or less have movies about their couple-ship and they don’t even have to try. The fans will probably oversee the wedding themselves.
But just because life hates Joon doesn’t mean he lets it get the best of him. He’s a selfless person that doesn’t let petty strife overcome his daily attitude towards those around him. And just because he’s standing with crossed arms while manager-hyung goes to bring the car around to drive Joon to his next schedule from SBS to KBS doesn’t mean that he’s sulking.
“Changsun-ah,” Seungho says, “Stop sulking. It makes you look like you have a unibrow.”
“Oh,” Joon sniffs. “So now I’m ugly, right, hyung? You think I’m ugly, don’t you? You think Junhyung is hotter than me, is that it?”
“The way you think hurts my brain,” Seungho sighs.
“And now I’m stupid-I’m stupid now, aren’t I, hyung?” Joon says, looking adamantly in the other direction. He can almost hear Seungho rolling his eyes. “You aren’t even going to miss me,” he mutters.
A moment passes-
And then Seungho is kissing him.
Right in SBS’s lobby, Seungho is kissing him full on the mouth, arms around Joon’s neck. When he draws back, he doesn’t draw back entirely and settles his arms around Joon’s shoulders in a tight embrace. “That’s right,” he says, amused, into Joon’s ear, “I’m not going to miss you at all, so do your schedule and then come back fast so I’ll never have to.”
There’s absolutely no one around in the lobby except for the occasional staff member sprinting across from one side to another to get to a studio on time. There are no fans waiting outside because it’s too cold for that and because they are recording on an odd, unexpected day. There are no other idols in sight-absolutely no one to witness this. No one will ever know how Seungho just almost made-out with Joon in a public place.
But with the way Seungho is smiling at Joon right now, to be honest, he doesn’t really care. The fans can keep Jonghyun and Key and Doojoon and Yoseob on camera all they want. Joon would rather have his rainclouds to himself.