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[holy_cats]

if, by an act of omission, you could spare one's feelings, would you do so?

I haven't told an unnamed person something because I know it will only cause them distress and sadness and there is nothing to be done to change anything either way. So is it wrong of me to not want to tell them

Comments

[laurahonest]

that depends. Is the omission going to come back and bite them in the ass? for example is their spouse cheating on them? That I would tell them.

Speaking for myself personally I would rather know, even if it hurts me and I would appreciate you telling me even though it added to the grief.

[candiedheart]

If they do find out, though, and find out you knew all along, would it hurt them even more?

A lie by omission is still a lie.

[holy_cats]

well, I had a miscarriage. And I haven't told anyone that. What if I just keep it to myself? It won't hurt anyone if I don't tell.

[cherany]

I was going to say don't tell, because people are always spilling secrets as a self-serving way to ease their own guilt, but then I read this comment. If the miscarriage is is the thing your post was about, then I think you should tell. While you will add some grief to another person's life, you will also give them the gift of being able to comfort you, to know you more intimately, and to feel they are important enough for you to confide in.

I'm really sorry it happened to you. :(