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Enter the bearded protagonist of our story, slightly intoxicated, highly irritated from a previous conversation, and covered in a thin layer of sweat that is slowly turning cold against his skin as he enters the air conditioned bedroom of his lover. He nudges her slowly over, forcing her partially into the crack between the bed--which is too small ( Read more... )

I've got several questions I would like to ask our creator, should I ever encounter it (obviously it) before I perish from this plane of reality. Here they are, ranked in order predicated on my current shitty mood ( Read more... )

If we all sit quietly and close our eyes and hold our breath ( Read more... )

For those of you who don't already know, You Tube "Queen" and "Break Free" and you will not be dissappointed! Freddie Mercury where you at? Pay special attention to Freddie's mustache, because he elects to shave it only AFTER his first, vacuum wielding appearance. Fucking genious ( Read more... )

Hey Peeps ( Read more... )

Hello Friends!
Come see Secrets play at the Battle of the Bands!
Tomorrow, Tue. July 10th @ 10 PM. Blue Bird!
I believe it's $3. It's going to be a good show.
It's us, the Alarmists, the Delicious, and Mountain Lion! Puma.
Plus another band that I don't know the name of...
Competition is stiff!

Hello Lovers ( Read more... )

Oh hell yes son ( Read more... )

Man, I am such a fucking wreck today, it be ridiculous! Last night I just kept making poor decision after poor decision, and apparently I was hell bent on destroying my body. FUCK ( Read more... )