Still in search of Burning Man tickets...
STILL in search of Burning Man tickets... trying to find two for under $500... grahhh.
Found THIS though.....
Tickets for Barter - Burning Man - $1 (Seattle)
Date: 2009-08-09, 2:47PM PDT
Reply to: sale-7js8x-1314445812@craigslist.org
Since I saw the previous post asking for hot sex in this area in exchange for two tickets to Burning Man, I decided that it was completely okay for me to put this up, too. I have three tickets to Burning Man. And YOU, girl who will strip naked and come shake your little bootymaker for us in the kitchen while balancing a lobster on your forehead.
My girlfriend and I decided that we needed people in our house to do naked things with us and have a wild night playing bocce with flaming walnuts, and so we're going to give YOU, naked happy gullible chick who wants to come over and inject some life into our dying relationship a chance to not only get one authentic Burning Man ticket, but also possibly make some cash on the side by subjugating your morals and playing Real Doll for us for an evening.
You must be female and capable of interacting with other human beings. We're interested in having sex with you (okay, she's not so into it, I'm just really wanting to do something other than watch “Dance Your Ass Off” on a Friday night on Tivo, and since she said, “Fine, whatever” I'm thinking this is as close to “yeah, I'm into it, oh baby” as I'm gonna get, we might as well “gift” these tickets to someone who is okay with my Lobster Thermidor fetish while she drinks herself into a stupor and mutters that weird mantra that sounds like, “My mother was right about you.”)
Look, I'm totally serious. This is gifting. You fuck me roundly while my girlfriend watches on the living room floor wearing a lobster dinner and I'll give you three tickets to Burning Man. I may even tape it so I can regift it to your friends and coworkers.
Since we're trying to recreate the Burning Man environment, we've decided to turn the heat up to over 110 degrees and dump baby powder continually through a fan on the sexual relations area. We'll even add a miasma of sunblock, used baby wipes, sweaty underwear, glitter, and industrial lube to the floor. I'll make sure to grin like a maniac and she plans on having the thousand-yard stare of as many hallucinogens as possible.
Don't worry, we'll make sure to dose your drink too so you can experience our mad, mad little wild playa fun night.
TO ALL OF YOU ASSHOLES SAYING I'M JUST TRYING TO BUY A THREESOME WITH MY GF - you're wrong. Wrong! And since you don't agree with me and the previous poster that offering tickets valued well over $600 for a single night of threesome sex, drugs, and “playa loving” does not in fact constitute solicitation for sex, well then, you just aren't a Burner. We solicit all sorts of sex from chicks out there all the time. Well, I do, anyway. With drugs. You must just not understand the Tao of the Sexual Awesome Enlightenment Temple of The Burning Sensation (which is what I named my two testicles).
Look, we just want to “gift” you three tickets so you can “gift” us temporary use of your body, right? No harm no foul, right? It's the “Gift” economy! Just like those times in college when my bros had one or two too many roofied sorority chicks and had to “gift” one to me. Good times, good times, but I wish they would have given me fewer of the transvestites. Not that I was complaining, mind you! Buttsex is still sex, baby.
So yes, “donate” your sexual favors to me and my girlfriend, who apparently can only get in the mood when Steve Jobs does the caterpillar on “Dancing with the Stars” and we'll “donate” you services and goods worth over $750.
Must be slender, svelte, Asian, be able to perform gymnastics, possess no gag reflex, be into seafood play, rope play, fudge play, turkey leg sodomy, bondage, S&M, and Steve Jobs. No freaks. Please send photos, name, address, phone number, references and the name of your doctor so we can confirm your fertility.
Peace love and please stop kicking me.
In other newssss.... school sucks, my friends rule, and Nick is amazing.
Thinking about dressing up like Pikachu and going out for a few hours on Friday...
Found THIS though.....
Tickets for Barter - Burning Man - $1 (Seattle)
Date: 2009-08-09, 2:47PM PDT
Reply to: sale-7js8x-1314445812@craigslist.org
Since I saw the previous post asking for hot sex in this area in exchange for two tickets to Burning Man, I decided that it was completely okay for me to put this up, too. I have three tickets to Burning Man. And YOU, girl who will strip naked and come shake your little bootymaker for us in the kitchen while balancing a lobster on your forehead.
My girlfriend and I decided that we needed people in our house to do naked things with us and have a wild night playing bocce with flaming walnuts, and so we're going to give YOU, naked happy gullible chick who wants to come over and inject some life into our dying relationship a chance to not only get one authentic Burning Man ticket, but also possibly make some cash on the side by subjugating your morals and playing Real Doll for us for an evening.
You must be female and capable of interacting with other human beings. We're interested in having sex with you (okay, she's not so into it, I'm just really wanting to do something other than watch “Dance Your Ass Off” on a Friday night on Tivo, and since she said, “Fine, whatever” I'm thinking this is as close to “yeah, I'm into it, oh baby” as I'm gonna get, we might as well “gift” these tickets to someone who is okay with my Lobster Thermidor fetish while she drinks herself into a stupor and mutters that weird mantra that sounds like, “My mother was right about you.”)
Look, I'm totally serious. This is gifting. You fuck me roundly while my girlfriend watches on the living room floor wearing a lobster dinner and I'll give you three tickets to Burning Man. I may even tape it so I can regift it to your friends and coworkers.
Since we're trying to recreate the Burning Man environment, we've decided to turn the heat up to over 110 degrees and dump baby powder continually through a fan on the sexual relations area. We'll even add a miasma of sunblock, used baby wipes, sweaty underwear, glitter, and industrial lube to the floor. I'll make sure to grin like a maniac and she plans on having the thousand-yard stare of as many hallucinogens as possible.
Don't worry, we'll make sure to dose your drink too so you can experience our mad, mad little wild playa fun night.
TO ALL OF YOU ASSHOLES SAYING I'M JUST TRYING TO BUY A THREESOME WITH MY GF - you're wrong. Wrong! And since you don't agree with me and the previous poster that offering tickets valued well over $600 for a single night of threesome sex, drugs, and “playa loving” does not in fact constitute solicitation for sex, well then, you just aren't a Burner. We solicit all sorts of sex from chicks out there all the time. Well, I do, anyway. With drugs. You must just not understand the Tao of the Sexual Awesome Enlightenment Temple of The Burning Sensation (which is what I named my two testicles).
Look, we just want to “gift” you three tickets so you can “gift” us temporary use of your body, right? No harm no foul, right? It's the “Gift” economy! Just like those times in college when my bros had one or two too many roofied sorority chicks and had to “gift” one to me. Good times, good times, but I wish they would have given me fewer of the transvestites. Not that I was complaining, mind you! Buttsex is still sex, baby.
So yes, “donate” your sexual favors to me and my girlfriend, who apparently can only get in the mood when Steve Jobs does the caterpillar on “Dancing with the Stars” and we'll “donate” you services and goods worth over $750.
Must be slender, svelte, Asian, be able to perform gymnastics, possess no gag reflex, be into seafood play, rope play, fudge play, turkey leg sodomy, bondage, S&M, and Steve Jobs. No freaks. Please send photos, name, address, phone number, references and the name of your doctor so we can confirm your fertility.
Peace love and please stop kicking me.
In other newssss.... school sucks, my friends rule, and Nick is amazing.
Thinking about dressing up like Pikachu and going out for a few hours on Friday...