Hello again, why so old? Wasn't time your friend?
25. Beggers Can't Be Choosers
"So why me?"
"Huh? Dude, uh..if you're gonna have an epiphany or somethin' I'mma just pull up my pants and go. I don't want no part in that deep shit."
"Not that, you cumbucket. I mean why did you approach me that day? You said you hated me, ever since that bullshit in Peru. What changed?"
"Craig. Are we seriously gonna have a faggy heart to heart? Really?"
"Answer the goddamn question, slut."
"Siiiiigh. Fine. It was cuz...cuz...I wanted to see you smile."
"Homo."
"Says the bonerrangler who pounds butt."
"I don't accept that."
"What, that you don't pound butt? Dude, get rid of that denial. Its not that attractive. Matter of fact, I have some tapes here that'll clear that right up."
"Shut the fuck up, you gigantic moron. And answer the question honestly before I choke you with my fucking cock."
"Aww Craiggers, you know me so well. Death by cock isn't my favorite way to go, so I suppose I'll continue. I really just wanted to know what other kinds of tricks that middle finger of yours does. And boy-did I."
"Yup, that sounds about right. Now. About those tapes."
"Hehe, welcome to the dark side, Craiggers. We have Kenny porn."
26. Last This Day
"You're a fuckin retard, do you know that? You could have gotten yourself killed!"
"Don't get your panties in a bunch, blondie. I'm right here. Not dead."
"But you could have died! And just to protect me, some fucker who dies and comes back all the damn time."
"You're way off base, dude. I didn't do it to protect your scrawny ass....my body moved on its own."
"That car must've scrambled your fuckin brain harder than I thought to have you quoting Naruto."
"Look, I can't talk to your dumb ass when you're clear across the room and hysterical over my well being. Come over here, Kenny."
"No, fuck you! I'm goin' home, I don't give a shit about your stupid fuckin ass!"
"Yeah? Then why'd you stay until I woke up."
"Someone needed to make sure they didn't mistake your ugly face for a rotting corpses!"
"Ouch, that hurts my feelings. Now that you're done bitching, come over here."
"Ugly, crooked toothed, cave man-"
"Closer."
"Cum guzzling, dick gobbling-"
"Not close enough, bitch."
"Cuntwaffle, casper pale- HEY! Who the fuck gave you permission to put me in your lap?!"
"I did, so shut your goddamn mouth and settle down."
"You fu- mmph!"
"You were saying?"
"I hate you. Asshole. You almost- could have- died. And then what would I have done?"
"Is it your turn for a faggy confession or some shit."
"Fuck you!"
"Don't have to tell me twice."
"Wha- H-hey 'm not- nnngh- C-Craig you...fffffff..."
"Quit pussyfooting around. I'm not dead."
"But you- ahn- STOP DOING THAT WHEN I'M TRYIN TO MAKE A POINT!"
"Shit happens. You know that. Stop pitching a bitch over what ifs and spread your legs."
"Aha, you- mmm- a-always knew just what to say."
"I'm not going to be off-ed by something retarded like a car."
"So you admit you're stupid. Awe- gah! Don't sneak attack my butthole you dickweed!"
"I want to hear less lip and feel more tongue. Shut the fuck up. Kay, thanks."
27. Midnight Visitor
"What the fuck was that."
"Huh? Dude, I'm not fallin for that again, go back to sleep, I'll fuck you in the mornin."
"That noise, shithead. Didn't you hear it?"
"No, I was sleepin, like you should be doing. Dun call me a shithead...I don't hear nothin.."
"I know I heard it. I'm not deaf and retarded unlike some cuntrags I-"
"Kenny?"
"Whaaa? Craig, seriously, fo the fuck to sleep."
"That wasn't me. I don't have to voice of a goddamn little girl."
"I dunno bout that. Whenever I suck on your left nut I hear otherwise."
"K-Kenny?"
"Karen? The hell you doin still up?"
"Told you it was't me you fucking ass."
"Pipe down in front, Craiggers. Big brother business here. Karen, what's wrong? If this is about those magazines, you can borrow 'em in the mornin."
"No I...can I sleep in here tonight? I had a bad dream."
"No."
"Fuck you, Craig, you don't tell me what to do!"
"Hey, watch your mouth you little cunt, or I'll-"
"Or you'll what, flip me off? Ooh, I'm so scared of the middle finger of some pussy ass white boy."
"Thats it, I know this works on your dumbass brother, so I'm sure it'll work on your bitchass too."
"You're gonna stick your cock up my ass? Pedo alert! Real great idea, moron. Unlike him, I don't got a prostate. Kenny! Your boyfriend's tryin ta hurt me! ....Kenny?"
"He fell asleep. Awesome. Useless piece of shit..."
"Yeah well, whatever. Move your fat ass over, we can still get back to sleep before Ma and Pa start their bullshit next door."
"Fine. But I better not find your fucking hand on my junk when I wake up."
"Whatever you say, douche bag. You're not that attractive...dunno what he sees in you. Sigh. Brothers."
".....He's not my boyfriend. That's gay."
"Yes, because doing it in the butt isn't gay enough without adding the whole boyfriend tag."
"Your opinion means jack shit to me."
"Go the fuck to sleep you damn drama queen! Jesus. Kenny'll still be here to suck your balls in the mornin."
"You better be gone by then."
"Faster'n you can spell hot anal sex."
28. Grilled Cheese Caper
"Wow."
"SHIT! K-Kenny, man this...this isn't what it looks like. Seriously."
"Ahahaha, o-okay Stan...I'll let you try ta build me a bullshit excuse. This could be fun."
"I-I uhm. Well I was...taking a shower! yeah! You've got to get naked for that. And as I was drying off I got uh...hungry, and I just couldn't wait long enough to put clothes on. So I came down here, to the kitchen, in my towel, to make grilled cheese. The end."
"Plausible story, Stanley. But here's the real question: Where's your towlel?"
"......Goddammit Kenny. What do you want from me? To admit I religiously make grilled cheese sandwiches in the nude at midnight on saturday nights like clock work?"
"Pretty much. Also, I want half."
"...Half...?"
"Of your dick."
"W-What?! DUDE!"
"Hahahaha, calm the fuck down, Stan the man. I know your wang belongs to Princess Kylie. I meant I want half of that sandwich. I'm fuckin starvin."
"Kenny me...me and Kyle aren't even like that! Jeez, you get caught in the bathroom one time and-"
"Yeah, no, you've gotten caught at least four times. Oh and once behind the bleachers."
"Whatever, just sit down. This'll be done in a minute."
"Mmkay. Hey. You can stop sheilding your junk now. I've been starin' for the past ten minutes, and the sight ain't gettin' any less dick-filled."
"Shut up, Kenny."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yes troppi_desideri I was thinking of you and your Stan-the-man ways when I wrote that last one.
On a side note WHY THE FUCK IS THIS STILL BLUE?! I'M GETTING PISSED OFF.
Anyway, yes, yes fucka u.
Also, I think I enjoyed Craig and Karen's banter alot more than I should have.
Big brother!Kenny to the rescue! Woot.
So peace out, beetches <333
"So why me?"
"Huh? Dude, uh..if you're gonna have an epiphany or somethin' I'mma just pull up my pants and go. I don't want no part in that deep shit."
"Not that, you cumbucket. I mean why did you approach me that day? You said you hated me, ever since that bullshit in Peru. What changed?"
"Craig. Are we seriously gonna have a faggy heart to heart? Really?"
"Answer the goddamn question, slut."
"Siiiiigh. Fine. It was cuz...cuz...I wanted to see you smile."
"Homo."
"Says the bonerrangler who pounds butt."
"I don't accept that."
"What, that you don't pound butt? Dude, get rid of that denial. Its not that attractive. Matter of fact, I have some tapes here that'll clear that right up."
"Shut the fuck up, you gigantic moron. And answer the question honestly before I choke you with my fucking cock."
"Aww Craiggers, you know me so well. Death by cock isn't my favorite way to go, so I suppose I'll continue. I really just wanted to know what other kinds of tricks that middle finger of yours does. And boy-did I."
"Yup, that sounds about right. Now. About those tapes."
"Hehe, welcome to the dark side, Craiggers. We have Kenny porn."
26. Last This Day
"You're a fuckin retard, do you know that? You could have gotten yourself killed!"
"Don't get your panties in a bunch, blondie. I'm right here. Not dead."
"But you could have died! And just to protect me, some fucker who dies and comes back all the damn time."
"You're way off base, dude. I didn't do it to protect your scrawny ass....my body moved on its own."
"That car must've scrambled your fuckin brain harder than I thought to have you quoting Naruto."
"Look, I can't talk to your dumb ass when you're clear across the room and hysterical over my well being. Come over here, Kenny."
"No, fuck you! I'm goin' home, I don't give a shit about your stupid fuckin ass!"
"Yeah? Then why'd you stay until I woke up."
"Someone needed to make sure they didn't mistake your ugly face for a rotting corpses!"
"Ouch, that hurts my feelings. Now that you're done bitching, come over here."
"Ugly, crooked toothed, cave man-"
"Closer."
"Cum guzzling, dick gobbling-"
"Not close enough, bitch."
"Cuntwaffle, casper pale- HEY! Who the fuck gave you permission to put me in your lap?!"
"I did, so shut your goddamn mouth and settle down."
"You fu- mmph!"
"You were saying?"
"I hate you. Asshole. You almost- could have- died. And then what would I have done?"
"Is it your turn for a faggy confession or some shit."
"Fuck you!"
"Don't have to tell me twice."
"Wha- H-hey 'm not- nnngh- C-Craig you...fffffff..."
"Quit pussyfooting around. I'm not dead."
"But you- ahn- STOP DOING THAT WHEN I'M TRYIN TO MAKE A POINT!"
"Shit happens. You know that. Stop pitching a bitch over what ifs and spread your legs."
"Aha, you- mmm- a-always knew just what to say."
"I'm not going to be off-ed by something retarded like a car."
"So you admit you're stupid. Awe- gah! Don't sneak attack my butthole you dickweed!"
"I want to hear less lip and feel more tongue. Shut the fuck up. Kay, thanks."
27. Midnight Visitor
"What the fuck was that."
"Huh? Dude, I'm not fallin for that again, go back to sleep, I'll fuck you in the mornin."
"That noise, shithead. Didn't you hear it?"
"No, I was sleepin, like you should be doing. Dun call me a shithead...I don't hear nothin.."
"I know I heard it. I'm not deaf and retarded unlike some cuntrags I-"
"Kenny?"
"Whaaa? Craig, seriously, fo the fuck to sleep."
"That wasn't me. I don't have to voice of a goddamn little girl."
"I dunno bout that. Whenever I suck on your left nut I hear otherwise."
"K-Kenny?"
"Karen? The hell you doin still up?"
"Told you it was't me you fucking ass."
"Pipe down in front, Craiggers. Big brother business here. Karen, what's wrong? If this is about those magazines, you can borrow 'em in the mornin."
"No I...can I sleep in here tonight? I had a bad dream."
"No."
"Fuck you, Craig, you don't tell me what to do!"
"Hey, watch your mouth you little cunt, or I'll-"
"Or you'll what, flip me off? Ooh, I'm so scared of the middle finger of some pussy ass white boy."
"Thats it, I know this works on your dumbass brother, so I'm sure it'll work on your bitchass too."
"You're gonna stick your cock up my ass? Pedo alert! Real great idea, moron. Unlike him, I don't got a prostate. Kenny! Your boyfriend's tryin ta hurt me! ....Kenny?"
"He fell asleep. Awesome. Useless piece of shit..."
"Yeah well, whatever. Move your fat ass over, we can still get back to sleep before Ma and Pa start their bullshit next door."
"Fine. But I better not find your fucking hand on my junk when I wake up."
"Whatever you say, douche bag. You're not that attractive...dunno what he sees in you. Sigh. Brothers."
".....He's not my boyfriend. That's gay."
"Yes, because doing it in the butt isn't gay enough without adding the whole boyfriend tag."
"Your opinion means jack shit to me."
"Go the fuck to sleep you damn drama queen! Jesus. Kenny'll still be here to suck your balls in the mornin."
"You better be gone by then."
"Faster'n you can spell hot anal sex."
28. Grilled Cheese Caper
"Wow."
"SHIT! K-Kenny, man this...this isn't what it looks like. Seriously."
"Ahahaha, o-okay Stan...I'll let you try ta build me a bullshit excuse. This could be fun."
"I-I uhm. Well I was...taking a shower! yeah! You've got to get naked for that. And as I was drying off I got uh...hungry, and I just couldn't wait long enough to put clothes on. So I came down here, to the kitchen, in my towel, to make grilled cheese. The end."
"Plausible story, Stanley. But here's the real question: Where's your towlel?"
"......Goddammit Kenny. What do you want from me? To admit I religiously make grilled cheese sandwiches in the nude at midnight on saturday nights like clock work?"
"Pretty much. Also, I want half."
"...Half...?"
"Of your dick."
"W-What?! DUDE!"
"Hahahaha, calm the fuck down, Stan the man. I know your wang belongs to Princess Kylie. I meant I want half of that sandwich. I'm fuckin starvin."
"Kenny me...me and Kyle aren't even like that! Jeez, you get caught in the bathroom one time and-"
"Yeah, no, you've gotten caught at least four times. Oh and once behind the bleachers."
"Whatever, just sit down. This'll be done in a minute."
"Mmkay. Hey. You can stop sheilding your junk now. I've been starin' for the past ten minutes, and the sight ain't gettin' any less dick-filled."
"Shut up, Kenny."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yes troppi_desideri I was thinking of you and your Stan-the-man ways when I wrote that last one.
On a side note WHY THE FUCK IS THIS STILL BLUE?! I'M GETTING PISSED OFF.
Anyway, yes, yes fucka u.
Also, I think I enjoyed Craig and Karen's banter alot more than I should have.
Big brother!Kenny to the rescue! Woot.
So peace out, beetches <333