001 [VIDEO]

[house_onthehill]

[The video function of the device lights up and now you see a very haggard-looking man with a glare and a dangerous twirl to his cane.]

So, it's official...I relapsed back into psychosis. Thought I was done with that phase of my life but guess my good frenemy Vicodin has reared her ugly head again. Note to self, find equipment for a self-

Comments

[house_onthehill]

Great, now let's start this before whatever hallucinogen is affecting me wears off. Where the fuck am I?

[house_onthehill]

[WATCH HIM FACE PALM] Did I not make it clear that I wanted a rational explanation that did not involve outer space, because we're not.

[subshiki]

You wish it was psychosis.

[ forwarding! ]

[house_onthehill]

I'd rather think of all this as such. Who are you, where are we, and are you for real? I've had psychotic episodes before and this qualifies as much.

[subshiki]

I just sent you information on where you are.

As for who I am, I don't feel like sharing right now.

[house_onthehill]

I read the information, found it a good read, and dismissed it. [NOT REALLY.]

Ooh, girls love the mysterious bad boy. Too bad, I'm not 15 and sporting a pair of ovaries.

[fierybluebird]

A place full of monsters and mad scientists.

Strangely not on the Grand Line.

I'm Marco, nice to meet you Mr. House.

[house_onthehill]

Doctor and unless you have a proper explanation not only to this dank place, but this Grand Line, leave the discussion, would you kindly?

[fierybluebird]

Ah, my apologies. Dr. House then. [Actually respectful nod. Nurses terrify him, doctors get a lot of respect from him.]

All right, what explanation are you looking for? The Grand Line is my home ocean. I'm told most people who get pulled here are from another world than this, or even mine, but since that probably ranks up with "sci-fi" you mentioned, it doesn't seem like that something that will satisfy you, eh.

[house_onthehill]

By the looks of things...no explanation will satisfy my needs so I guess I'll accept the conditions for now.

Anything else to do besides survival and reduce myself into adoring a severed sow head? [/Lord of the Flies reference]

[insouciantmaybe]

If this were all figments of imagination I think perhaps I wouldn't be so helpless like the rest.

In my head I'm Super Man.

[house_onthehill]

Good for you, now find your imaginary Lois Clark and kindly leave the grown-ups to talk...though I'm not seeing any except you.

All right, I'll bite; what's going on.

[insouciantmaybe]

Who's Lois Lane?

[A beat, he looks at the screen thoughtfully.] You were kidnapped. You don't remember waking up on the operating table?

[house_onthehill]

...Goddamn, either I'm old or I'm REALLY psychotic.

Adding fuel to the fire, I thought that was a bad dream.

{Video}

[dontcallmegol]

{Sci-Fi Convention? That's a strange name for your solar system. :|a Huurrr durrr. Have a freckled pirate tilting his head at you. He's not really sure what half of what you said means but... he at least understood your question.}

Alright Mr. House... You were kidnapped by Scientists and left here to fend for yourself. {I may want to add that he's very straight-faced and serious about this. But we'll start off slow and let you ask the questions.}

Name's Ace, by the way. Portgas D. Ace. {And a tip of that bright orange hat for you sir.}

{Video}

[house_onthehill]

[At least this guy is polite...too bad House isn't likely to return the favor.]

So I head from the others but here's the thing: I'm a drug-addled cripple who clearly belongs on the other side of the experiment. Frankly, this actually looks like something I'd come up with after a round of amphetamines and a marathon of The Twilight Zone.

And I'll stick to Ace, even though you still like a Vegas conman.

{Video}

[dontcallmegol]

{His brow furrows some at this, eyes taking on a slightly critical stare as if he's trying to figure out if you were joking. To be honest, he didn't like the sound of you taking THEIR side of things. Let alone slight confusion at what an Amphetamine is or The Twilight Zone for that matter.}

... Are you one of them? A scientist I mean. Or are you a native to this world?

{Cause, looking back on it, you very well could be for all he knows. A lot of the others were just as confused or unamused by all of this as you were.}

There's not much to gain here so no worries about that, and Ace is just fine. {Totally not denying the conman bit, he'd weaseled his way out of trouble or into a free meal on several occasions. Hell he managed to steal quite a few things with his friendly charm too. Pirate after all. Not that House could tell considering he's not the stereotypical, run-o-the mill kind of pirate from Earth.}

{Video}

[house_onthehill]

[House smirks and shakes his head slightly]

If I was a 'scientist' [Airquotes] why would I rough it out with my subjects? Tarnishes the results value with personal bias. And do I look like I'm native?