yeah. after a long while of extensive chemical abuse i eventually realized that reality itself can be more fucked up than any chemical adventure.
sobriety can be scarier and a lot more fun. and the physical benifits are really cool.
its probably easy for me though. i seem to have destroyed my ability to be self-destructive. accept for smoking. i think "thats not going to do any good" and so dont do it. i only do what i REALLY want to do most of the time. wish i could be self-destructive again. i keep trying, but it just isnt working. stupid brain. I"LL GET YOU FOR THIS. I"LL GET YOU REEEAAALL GOOD <- brain.. not you..
uhh... yeah. anyway. uhh
your a lot cooler to hang out with when sober anyway. i'm not afraid your going to smash my head in with anything.. ;) <- SMILEY FACE WINKING ERRRR SOMETHINGG
ok enough preachy bullshit that only applies to me really i guess uhh..
i just talked to you on the phone isnt that fun woooooo WOOOOOO
Way to go Jeff! Doesn't it feel good to have control over yourself? Not many people have that. Most people are weak! I am on 3 months of being sober now:)
I knew it was you but with you and jeff being together and both on livejournal and me half asleep...well you know...a little confusion there! hehehe plus I am blond ya know:) Call me sometime I miss ya! You can come over for some chai tea and some tarot:)
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remind me to give you a high-five next time i'm around.
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i am amazed at your will power....
i thought of you when i was in vegas. i thought of drinking, to stop feeling like dying....but then i might have ran out in front of cars n shit.
i thought, if you can do it....so can i.
ill use you for my guide perhaps. :)
i miss you....i will write soon. soon as i get my self back.
thank you for writing me.
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ya, running in front of cars is not good.
hope we can snail mail soon.
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yeah. after a long while of extensive chemical abuse i eventually realized that reality itself can be more fucked up than any chemical adventure.
sobriety can be scarier and a lot more fun. and the physical benifits are really cool.
its probably easy for me though. i seem to have destroyed my ability to be self-destructive. accept for smoking. i think "thats not going to do any good" and so dont do it. i only do what i REALLY want to do most of the time. wish i could be self-destructive again. i keep trying, but it just isnt working. stupid brain. I"LL GET YOU FOR THIS. I"LL GET YOU REEEAAALL GOOD <- brain.. not you..
uhh... yeah. anyway. uhh
your a lot cooler to hang out with when sober anyway. i'm not afraid your going to smash my head in with anything.. ;) <- SMILEY FACE WINKING ERRRR SOMETHINGG
ok enough preachy bullshit that only applies to me really i guess uhh..
i just talked to you on the phone isnt that fun woooooo
WOOOOOO
ok i'll stop now
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(why would you think id have smashed yer head in?)
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unpredictability makes me fear that my head is going to be smashed
or something
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