you always hurt the ones you love

[otempora01]

Got kind of crazy at the end (what is it with me and the crazy endings), but James got sick of me writing about his brother's love life, held a wand to my head, and made me write this. Of course, Al snuck his love life in here, too, but, James is content since the spotlight is mostly on him. Anyway.

you always hurt the ones you love
otempora01, rated PG for kissing.
Harry Potter, Teddy/James, m/m post-series.
Just because James couldn’t have him didn’t mean that Victoire could.
Complete, 7,734 words.



James was five years old and it was his birthday. It was perfectly timed this year, falling during the week of Easter Break so Teddy was off from Hogwarts with stories to tell and presents to give him. James had sort of been neglecting all the other guests to sit in the living room with Teddy and listen to him talk about the classes and teachers at Hogwarts while his hair changed from turquoise to scarlet to pink.

James loved to watch and listen to Teddy. Even when he was doing boring big kid things, like reading and writing and homework, he was still the most fascinating person James had ever known. Besides, there were things about Teddy that you missed if you didn’t watch him, like the freckles he only had when he was asleep and wasn’t concentrating enough to metamorph them away or the amber flecks in his naturally brown eyes. James liked being the only one who knew those sorts of things about Teddy, like he was reading the unabridged Teddy Lupin biography while everybody else was puzzling over the manual.

Besides, Teddy never treated him like a kid, not like Uncle Ron whose conversations began and ended with, “Wait ‘til you get your letter from Hogwarts,” as though the entire eleven years James would live through before then didn’t mean anything. Teddy listened to him, even when he was talking about things like bogies and changing Lily’s nappies, and Teddy never talked down to him or made him feel like what he was saying didn’t matter.

James loved Albus and Rose and Lily and Hugo, but he wouldn’t have minded skipping back two years when Teddy was over all the time, playing hide and seek and gnome-flinging.

“I think they’re getting out your cake,” Teddy said, his hair changing to and then staying hot pink as he pushed himself out of the armchair. James scrambled up off the floor and tried not to look like he’d been hanging on Teddy’s every word. “We should probably get to the kitchen, yeah?”

“You haven’t given me my present yet!” James protested, screwing his face into the best pout he could manage. Al was better at working the cute angle than he was, but James could whine like no one else. “I want my present!”

Teddy grinned. “Who says I got you a present? My being here should be present enough for you.”

“You know it is, Teddy, but my present!” James insisted, now tugging on Teddy’s sweater. “You said in your owl that you’d gotten me something good.”

“I certainly did,” Teddy said, glancing at the door before withdrawing an Ever-Bashing Boomerang from his pocket.

James screeched. “You got it! I can’t believe you got it! How did you get it past Filch?” he asked, grabbing the boomerang and spinning about with it. He was half-tempted to try throwing it here and now, but that was how his last one had met its fiery end (via his Mum) and he didn’t want this one to suffer the same fate. “You’re the greatest, Teddy!”

“Put that away and let’s go have cake,” Teddy said with a warm smile. “And if you get this one blown up, too, I’m not smuggling another one in for you.”

“Right, right.”

James hid the boomerang under the armchair cushion, took Teddy’s hand, and together they walked into the kitchen.

Everybody was already inside. His Mum and Dad were lighting the candles on his cake while Professor Neville and Uncle Ron chatted amongst themselves. Aunt Hermione, Uncle Charlie, Uncle Percy, Uncle George, Uncle Bill and Aunt Fleur were standing around the table, watching the kids with smiles.

On one side of the table sat Al, Victoire, and Rose. Al was making faces at Lily across the table, making her clap and giggle in her high chair, and Rose had her nose buried in a book. Hugo, next to Lily, was trying to reach the cake without falling over but Victoire was catching his little hand each time he came close. Grandma Molly, Grandpa Arthur, and God-grandma Andromeda hadn’t been able to make it.

Still, it was a wonder all of them even fit into the room.

“I want Teddy to sit next to me,” James announced as he took his seat at the head of the table. “Get up, Al.”

“But I want to sit next to you,” Al said, pouting. “I’m your brother.”

James pouted right back. “But I like Teddy more than I like you and it’s my birthday.”

“Dad!” Al cried.

“Mum!” James cried louder.

“How about I sit in the empty seat next to Hugo, which would also put me next to you?” Teddy suggested with the wisdom that came with his age. “Is that alright?”

James considered making a fuss-he wanted Teddy on his right side because he wrote with his right hand and liked that side better-but Al looked every bit as ready to fuss as he was. It wasn’t worth it.

”Alright, sit there, then.”

His Mum and Dad finished lighting the candles and everybody launched into their own renditions of happy birthday. Teddy’s involved changing himself into a sort of pig-human hybrid, with pig ears atop his pink hair and a pig snout, and wailing off-key. Naturally, James liked his the best.

“-to you!” everybody finished enthusiastically. James leaned forward in his seat, closed his eyes, and blew out the candles.

He reopened them to pandemonium.

Teddy was shaking in his seat, eyes going gold and inhuman. He was also snarling, his nose and mouth beginning to jut out and his teeth getting longer and sharper.

“Bloody hell!” Uncle Ron shouted. “Hermione, Ginny, Fleur, get-”

“We’re on it, Ron,” Mum shouted back, grabbing Lily while Aunt Hermione grabbed Hugo and Aunt Fleur grabbed Victoire. “Rose, Albus, James, come with us now.”

James blinked, bewildered, as his Mum, Aunt Fleur, and Aunt Hermione practically ran from the room. Rose and Albus exchanged glances, but a particularly loud growl from Teddy had them scrambling out of their seats and dashing after their mothers.

“What’s the matter with everyone?” James asked aloud. “Teddy’s only meta-”

He finished on a scream as Teddy tackled him, his face completely distorted until it was more like a wolf’s, albeit a pink one, than like his Teddy’s. James’ heart thudded in his chest, but he couldn’t seem to do anything but lie there, stunned, as the wolf growled and snarled and got dribble all over his face.

It was over as quickly as it had begun. His Dad wrenched Teddy off of him and Professor Longbottom dragged him to his feet and picked him up.

“Get him outside!” Uncle Bill was screaming. “Get him out to the backyard before he eats somebody, and it looks like James is going to be his hors d’oeuvres!”

“No! That-Teddy’s not-what’s-” James babbled as Professor Longbottom carried him out of the kitchen. He saw the lower half of Teddy’s body transform entirely into that of a pink wolf just as Uncle Bill, Uncle Charlie, Uncle Percy, Dad, and Uncle Ron all pointed their wands at him before he could see no more. “Teddy’s not…”

“I’m sorry you had to see that,” Professor Longbottom said softly as they went up the stairs. “Teddy’s twelve now, almost a teenager, so we thought for sure his lycanthropy wouldn’t manifest itself. Otherwise…”

“What’s ly-can-poppy?” James asked, fighting back tears. “And what does it have to do with my Teddy or whatever that thing was?”

“Lycanthropy is a condition Teddy has,” Professor Longbottom was speaking slowly, as though considering every word before he said them. “That causes him to turn into a werewolf at the full moon, apparently a werewolf the same color as his hair was at the time of transformation.”

James sniffled. “Teddy’s a werewolf?”

“Yes, just like his father. We’d been hoping… well, I suppose it doesn’t matter now. What does matter is that Teddy should be back to normal in the morning and he’ll feel absolutely horrible about trying to eat you, so don’t be too rough on him, alright?”

James sniffled again, but didn’t reply.

Professor Longbottom carried him upstairs to his god-grandfather’s bedroom, where Aunt Hermione and Mum were cradling the shaking forms of Rose and Al while Aunt Fleur sang a French lullaby to Lily and Hugo. Professor Longbottom set him down and, with a grim look at the girls, went back downstairs. James walked mechanically over to the bed and sat down next to Aunt Hermione.

“I sent an owl to Professor Slughorn for some Wolfsbane Potion, but even if he does have some on hand, it won’t do Teddy much good now,” she said worriedly. “I feel like such a fool. I shouldn’t have thrown out our reserve supplies last year. This is entirely my fault.”

“Don’t be silly,” Mum snapped. “You couldn’t have known. None of us had any idea. We were sure he was clean. We’ll just have to be more careful with him, is all.”

“I owled Professor McGonagall, too, to let her know so she can make sure kids stay away from the Shrieking Shack again,” Aunt Hermione continued as if she hadn’t spoken. “At least he only has to deal with it alone for two months before he’ll be back here with us-and next year he’ll have Victoire.”

The girl in question was staring out the window. “I should go downstairs and help them. I’m sure I can calm him down. I’ve got some werewolf blood in me-”

“No, you do not,” Aunt Fleur said, sounding very testy. “And if you do, eet eez very weak. If you go down zere, you will be killed.”

“Teddy wouldn’t kill her,” James shouted unexpectedly, clenching his fists. “Teddy would never do that, no matter what’s happening to him! Don’t you tell lies about him!”

“James Sirius Potter,” his Mum said warningly. “Don’t you talk to your aunt like that.”

“She’s telling lies about Teddy,” James said, voice cracking as the tears he’d been fighting rolled down his cheeks. “Teddy’s turning into a werewolf and she’s up here telling lies about him when he’s probably downstairs scared and alone and wondering what’s happening to him and I can’t help him because I’m too little and I don’t know any magic and he tried to eat me.”

The last word was more of a sob, but James shook off Aunt Hermione’s attempt to comfort him. “I just want Teddy to be okay,” he whispered, pulling his knees up to his chest and hugging them tightly.

Victoire crossed over to him and rested a hand on his messy dark red hair. “That makes two of us, James.”

“Three,” Rose said, her body shaking although her voice did not.

“Four,” Al agreed, neither voice nor body shaking as he reached over and touched his brother’s shoulder.

“All of us want Teddy to be okay,” Aunt Hermione said gently. “There’s nothing more important to us than that.”

This time, James allowed her to hug him, not even protesting when Victoire hugged him from behind, Al from one side, Rose from the other, and Aunt Fleur and his Mum all moved in to turn it into one, big group hug. Normally James hated those things, but the warm contact made him feel less alone. He closed his eyes and wished that whatever magical creature dealt with wishes would disregard his previous wish for a racing broom and would make Teddy okay instead.

Later, after everyone had gone to sleep, James snuck down to the kitchen, removed all the raw meat from the fridge, and took it outside. Teddy was curled into a fuzzy pink ball by the garbage cans, his paw in his mouth. Every so often, he would bite viciously on it. James winced each time it happened, but worked quietly until every single last bit of meat was in a pile in front of Teddy. Hesitantly, he touched Teddy’s nose, then turned and hurried back into the house before the wolf could wake up.

The next morning, the meat was gone and so was Teddy.

James was ten, just a year short of Hogwarts, but Teddy was seventeen and just a year short of graduating. When he’d been younger, he’d sort of wished that Teddy would stop aging so that he could catch up and they could be at Hogwarts together, throwing dungbombs at people and transforming into teachers so they could send innocent first years dashing off to the Astronomy Tower for laughs. He’d realized the silliness in his wish sometime between seven and eight but now, realizing that he’d be going to Hogwarts the same year Teddy would leave it, he couldn’t help but wish that wishes came true.

Teddy looked up from his homework for the first time since he’d arrived, raising a boringly brown eyebrow. “You’ve been staring at me for thirty minutes now. What’s the matter?”

“Nothing,” James said, shifting uncomfortably in the armchair. “It’s just… your hair is brown.”

Teddy glanced up, then back at James. “Yes, it… does that sometimes. I think it happened when I was born with brown hair, but I can’t be sure.”

James ignored him. “Make it purple or something. Or gold. Remember when you made your hair red and gold?”

“Hoping you’ll get sorted into Gryffindor, then?” Teddy asked, ignoring him. “Not afraid you’ll be sorted into Slytherin?”

“Me? In Slytherin?” James scoffed. “Don’t be stupid, Teddy. I’m 100% Gryffindor on both sides.”

“Your parents have nothing to do with what House you get sorted into,” Teddy said with a smile. “I mean, my Mum was in Hufflepuff and I didn’t get sorted with the badgers.”

James frowned as Teddy went back to his homework. Teddy had been doing that a lot lately, making fleeting references to his parents before shifting the conversation topic or going on to something else. At first, James had thought he wanted to talk about them, but when James had tried, Teddy had become distant and reserved with him for almost a week. That had been the longest almost-week of James’ life. He’d never tried to talk about Teddy’s parents again.

Still, Teddy had been becoming more and more withdrawn. It seemed like every time James saw him, another bit of the light in Teddy’s eyes had gone out. He was afraid that he’d look at Teddy one day and see nothing but a hollow body for the wolf to possess once a month.

The only time Teddy ever seemed truly like himself was when, James scowled, he was with Victoire. He didn’t know what had happened between the time they’d all gone to wave her and Teddy off and when they’d gone to pick them up again, but Teddy and Victoire had become extremely close friends. Sometimes, when he was feeling truly down, James reckoned they were even closer than he and Teddy.

After all, Victoire had confirmed that her wolf blood, no matter how weak, calmed Teddy down during his “time of the month” (Rose’s words, not his). They’d probably bonded about how hard the life of a werewolf was in today’s day and age; even though it was now illegal to mistreat someone just because they were a werewolf, people still held on to their old prejudices. Teddy kept his lycanthropy a secret from everyone who hadn’t been there that night and refused to talk about it with anybody except Victoire. James’ Extendable Ears had proved that their private conversations sometimes consisted largely of Hogwarts and werewolf talk.

He’d never felt more left out in his life.

“Teddy,” he said, leaning forward and gathering his courage. “Tell me about your Mum and Dad.”

Teddy looked up sharply and, for one wild moment, James could have sworn he’d seen more of that light go out. Then, he looked down again and the moment was broken. “Where’re Al and Lily?”

“Al’s de-gnoming the garden and Lily’s at the Weasleys’,” James said impatiently. “Now tell me about your parents.”

“Why don’t you go help your brother de-gnome?”

“Why don’t you come help us both de-gnome. After you tell me about your parents.”

“Why are you pushing this, James?” Teddy asked, sounding desperate. “You know I don’t like to talk about them. They’re dead. Talking about them isn’t going to do anything but remind me that everything I know about them was told to me by other people.”

James got up out of the armchair, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from pointing out that he’d heard Teddy talk about his parents with Victoire because Teddy wasn’t supposed to know he’d been listening. Still, it hurt like nothing else.

“Just admit it, would you,” James said expressionlessly. “You think I’m just a kid, so I’m not worth talking to about your problems. You’ll listen to my problems all right, but you don’t take me seriously enough to think I’d be able to help you. Just because you’re older than me. I get it.”

“What?” Teddy blinked. “No, James, you don’t-”

“Stop lying to me,” James turned away. “I hate liars. You’re my best friend, Teddy, but obviously I was kidding myself into thinking you feel the same way about me. It’s Victoire, isn’t it? She’s your best friend because she’s closer to your age?”

“James, you don’t-”

“I said stop lying!” James shouted and ran from the room. It wasn’t the most mature reaction and certainly did nothing to prove his point, but he didn’t think he could stand to be in that room with Teddy anymore. Something inside him was breaking, he could feel it, but he just kept running through the house until he reached the backyard and was nearly beaned by a gnome.

“Oops, sorry, James!” Al said cheerfully, the smile falling as soon as he saw how wet James’ face was. “Bugger, what happened? Is Teddy okay?”

James wiped his face quickly. “Shut up, I’m fine. Watch where you’re throwing those gnomes.”

“It bit me,” Al said defensively. “Anyway, I’m not the one bawling-”

“I’m not bawling! I’m-I’m sweating! And I said shut up!”

Al flinched at the vicious glare James shot him, hurrying back to his gnomes. James sank down on the back step and held his face in his hands.

“…so, is Teddy okay?”

James’ shoulders slumped. “He’s fine. He’s so fine he’s probably owling Victoire right now to tell her how fine he is.”

“I doubt it,” Al snickered. “Since he’s right behind you and all.”

James sat up and turned. Teddy was, indeed, standing in the doorway and looking down at him. His hair, to James’ surprise, was turquoise with black polka dots, but before he could think about what that could mean, Al was shouting, “WHAT’S THAT, MUM? I’LL BE RIGHT THERE!” and pushing past him into the house.

James started to get up, but Teddy was sitting down before he could move and a warm arm was draped across his shoulders. James could feel his face heating up.

“Okay, you had your say in there, James, and now I’d like to talk, if you don’t mind?” Teddy said quietly, not waiting for James to stammer through a reply before he continued. “It’s not that I think you’re too young to understand. I just don’t want you to worry about me. Victoire, she sees me every day since we’re both in Gryffindor so it’s easy to talk to her, but you I only see on breaks and over the summer. I don’t want you to spend all your free time worried about whether or not I’m alright at Hogwarts.”

“I do that anyway,” James admitted, ducking his head sheepishly. “You never tell me how you are in your owls and I worry that you’re… that someone’s… I just worry. And I wish you’d…”

Teddy’s fingers were brushing idly against his shoulder, distracting him from whatever he was going to say until Teddy prompted, “Wish I’d what?”

“I wish you’d…” he murmured, looking up to meet Teddy’s gaze head on. “I wish you’d let me in more, like you do with Victoire. And I’m,” the blush returned and he looked away. “I’m afraid you’ll forget about me once you graduate and get a job.”

Teddy leaned over and hugged him fully now and, though the opportunity presented itself, James resisted the urge to crawl into his lap like he had in the past. He was ten now, for Merlin’s sake, too old to be crawling into people’s laps. He wasn’t above pressing his cheek against Teddy’s shirt and closing his eyes, however, soaking up the warmth and comfort and something else from this hug. He felt a little lightheaded as he pulled back just enough to look up into Teddy’s eyes and his breath caught at the fondness in them.

“I could never forget you, James Potter,” Teddy whispered. “In fact, I have a present for you.”

“Brilliant!” James said happily, never one to turn down a present, whether it was his birthday or not. His brow furrowed as Teddy let go of him and pulled a set of keys out of his pocket. “Um. I appreciate you wanting me to be able to get into Grimmauld, but I’m pretty sure Mum and Dad-”

Teddy laughed. “These aren’t the keys to Grimmauld. They’re the keys to my flat. I got a flat in London waiting for me after I graduate. The floo’s hooked up to yours and, soon as you hit seventeen, you’ll be able to Apparate in, but I reckoned you’d appreciate the symbolism. Not only are they the keys to my flat, they’re also the keys-”

“To your heart?”

“Um. I was going to say to my friendship,” Teddy was looking at him oddly now and James, blushing harder than ever, looked away. “Is there something we need to talk about?”

“Er, well, to be perfectly honest,” James said, clearing his throat and forcing himself to look at Teddy again. He was James Potter, daring prankster extraordinaire, not Albus Severus Potter, blushing crybaby. His cheeks may have been red, but his voice was steady when he continued, “I think I’m sporting what counts as a childhood crush. On you.”

Teddy’s eyebrows nearly disappeared into his hair without the use of his Metamorphmagus powers.

“It’s probably a phase I’ll grow out of,” James rushed to add. “But you asked...”

“Oh,” Teddy said, looking like he was caught somewhere between apprehension and amusement. “How… mature of you.”

“Mature enough to date?” James couldn’t help looking hopeful. “Because I wouldn’t object to-”

“No. Nice try, though.” Teddy patted his shoulder and stood. “Are we okay?”

James pocketed the keys and got up as well, watching the gnome Al hadn’t gotten to scurry around the bushes. “We’re okay.”

“Good. So,” Teddy smiled. “Come inside and I’ll tell you what I know about my parents.”

James was twelve and as soon as the Hogwarts Express had pulled away from the station, he found himself an empty compartment and stared at his feet.

“Oh, I’ve… I’ve just come to see Victoire off. Can we have a little privacy please? And don’t tell anybody!”

Teddy and Victoire. Teddy with Victoire. He should have seen it coming and the fact that he didn’t made it twice as hard to stand. He’d thought his eyes had been deceiving him when he’d seen the two of them snogging so heatedly that even the nervous firsties around them had been giggling. But then Teddy’s hair had turned turquoise and James would have been able to recognize him anywhere anyway.

He’d felt it was his job, nay, his duty to inform everybody about this convenient little arrangement. After all, it was obvious that Teddy was doing more than just “seeing her off” and the way he’d simply waved James away and gone back to his snogging had made James so angry he could hardly see straight. Of course, he’d been expecting a better reaction than Lily’s-sure, he wanted Teddy in the family, but not as Victoire’s husband-with some screaming and yelling and forbidding either one to see the other again, but when had James’ life ever been fair?

Now that he was done being angry, he just felt depressed. It’d only been two years ago that he’d told Teddy how he’d felt about him. He’d been young and convinced it was just a silly crush, but James had yet to grow out of anything but his clothes. If he had to be complete honest, his feelings for Teddy only seemed to increase with each passing year to the point where his completely disinterest in anyone but Teddy had made him worry that he was turning into a shirtlifter. He’d gone out with a few girls and liked it, but there was no one he fancied as much as Teddy.

And Teddy fancied Victoire.

As if in further proof that the universe hated him, the compartment door slid open and Victoire stepped in. She blinked in surprise, then bit her lip. “You told all of them, didn’t you?”

“Every one,” James said without lifting his head. “They didn’t care. Lily said it’d be cute if you got married.”

He heard her groan. “That’s why we didn’t want anyone knowing! Now we’re practically required to stay together.”

“Or you could just break up,” James suggested. “Right now.”

He could feel Victoire staring at him, but still didn’t lift his head. He was wearing sneakers, white ones with red stripes. He rather liked them.

“Are you… alright with Teddy and I dating?” Victoire asked after a long, hesitant moment. Even her tone was hesitant. “I know Teddy’s your best friend and I know he didn’t ask you, but I’m asking you now. James, may I please date Teddy?”

James felt very much like he was being placated. “I don’t care. Date him all you want. Marry him if you want, too. Then the both of you can have little part-Veela, part-werewolf, part-Metamorphmagus babies that turn into highly attractive purple werewolves every time the full moon rises.”

“I can’t believe this,” Victoire sounded exasperated. “He told me you might react like this, but I didn’t believe him about this silly little crush of yours-”

James’ head snapped up. “He told you?!”

“Well. Yes,” Victoire said, cheeks pink as she folded her arms and huffed. “He didn’t ask me out, you know. I asked him out. I was dropping all these hints every time I visited his flat and he just never seemed to get them, so finally I snogged him in the kitchen-”

“I don’t want to hear this!”

“-and he damn near threw me off him, he was so scared. I snog him and the first words out of his mouth are, ‘James is going to hate you.’ So, of course I ask him what he’s on about because, honestly, he shouldn’t be thinking about you when someone is snogging him-”

“I don’t see why not-”

“-and he said nothing and kept trying to push me in the fireplace, he was that eager to get rid of me, but I wheedled it out of him. He didn’t want you to hate him for dating me when he knows about your little crush on him-”

“It’s not a little-”

“-I kept telling him you’d be fine with it, but he wouldn’t agree to go out with me until I promised to keep things a secret and I’d been doing just fine with that for two years until you spilled the beans to the whole family!” Victoire finished with another huff, looking seconds away from tears. “Oh, James, how could you? I really fancy Teddy and if he dumps me because of something you did, I just don’t know what I’ll do.”

James, however, had only heard one integral part of her tirade. “…two years? You and Teddy have been-since I was ten?”

Victoire sighed and sank down in the seat opposite him. “Well, the kneazle’s out of the bag now. We’ve been going out since two months after he graduated. I’m sorry we didn’t tell you, James, but Teddy was so worried about losing you…”

“I told you I don’t care,” James said, forcing his tone to be flippant. “I’m going to go find Al. He’s probably shaking in his compartment and I wouldn’t be a good brother if I didn’t go make it worse.”

“James…”

“Bye, Victoire.”

He left the compartment and slid the door shut, jamming his hands into his pockets and heading down the hallway. Teddy and Victoire. The universe really did hate him.

James was seventeen and trying desperately not to let his distaste for the blonde sitting across from him show. He’d scared Al with the possibility of being sorted into Slytherin before Al’s first year Hogwarts and, as though out of spite, Al had not only been sorted into Slytherin, but had also gone out of his way to befriend the little pale-faced, pointy-headed blond kid their Uncle Ron had pointed out to them at the train station. His little brother seemed happy, and that was what really mattered, but James still wished every day that he’d kept his fat mouth shut so maybe Al would have been in Gryffindor with him and Lily and making friends with people who didn’t come from a long line of dark wizards.

Not that any of that was James’ problem anymore, except at times like this. He had graduated and was not affiliated with any House. But then, he was not affiliated with anything. He’d graduated with absolutely no idea of what he wanted to do with the rest of his life, much to his parents’ disappointment, and now he was wasting away at Grimmauld Place until he could figure something out.

This meant that he not only had to deal with his sixteen-year-old brother and his sixteen-year-old Malfoy friend, but he also had to deal with everybody trying to have a Talk with him about his Future. Many times, James had heard footsteps coming up the stairs and had dived out the window, hopped on a broom, and flown away with no particular destination in mind. The flights cleared his head in a way Apparation never could and, once that was done, he almost always found himself at Teddy’s.

Nine times out of ten, he got lucky and Victoire wasn’t there. That occasionally meant that Teddy wasn’t there either, but James would rather see no Teddy than a Teddy with Victoire attached to his side. Seven years and they were still going strong. It made him violently ill.

“Would you stop glaring at him like that?” Al hissed from across the table. “He’s not going to spontaneously combust.”

James blinked and came back to the present, looking around at everyone. His mother and father were deeply involved in their own private conversation, too involved to notice James’ glares in Scorpius Malfoy’s direction. Lily, sitting next to him, sighed.

“Tell the story again, Albus,” she said dreamily. “About Professor Longbottom and Professor Lovegood.”

James made a face. “Don’t you dare. I’m trying to eat.”

“There’s nothing wrong with professors in love! They’re human, too!”

“You need a boyfriend,” James told her. “And a hobby.”

“They have lives, James,” Lily snapped. “Professor Longbottom proves that every time we have him over.”

“As much as it pains me to admit it, I agree with your brother,” Scorpius said, sounding very much like it was paining him to speak. “That entire affair between Lovegood and Longbottom was and is disgusting.”

“You used to think library shelves were romantic,” James was unfortunate enough to hear Al whisper. He turned green about the same time Scorpius turned red.

“That’s more than what I can take,” he said, standing. “Mum, Dad, I’ll be at Teddy’s.”

He didn’t even wait for them to reply before he Apparated to Teddy’s flat, wanting to get as far away from his brother’s sickening display as possible in as little time as possible. It should have come as no surprise, then, that he Apparated right in the middle of a loud row.

“What about me?” Victoire was screaming, her face red and her eyes puffy as she whipped out her wand and pointed it at Teddy. He stopped short as he came out of the kitchen, staring at her wand angrily. “I’m your bloody girlfriend, Teddy, and we’ve been together for seven years!”

“I told you what to expect when you got into this!” Teddy screamed right back. James backed up until he was standing by the fireplace. He’d never heard Teddy scream before. He was flushed and sweaty and his hair was a flaming red mess and James kind of wanted him. “You said you were alright with that!”

“I thought things might be different now! It’s been-”

“Seven years, I know! Bloody hell, I know!”

He’d never heard Teddy curse before, either. It was equally hot.

“Fine!” Victoire fumed, not lowering her wand. “Then tell me this, Theodore Remus Lupin, why are we still together if this relationship isn’t going anywhere? Why don’t you just dump me while I’m still young and able to find someone else who actually fancies me and not my stupid cousin? He’s not underage anymore, is he, so why-”

Teddy suddenly looked very, very tired. “Victoire…”

“Since you won’t end it, I will. We’re done,” Victoire put her wand away at last, lowering her head, but James could see the shine of tears on her face. “Just go after him, Teddy. I bet he still fancies you and I’d bet even more that he’d love to hear you fancy him, too.”

“Victoire…” Teddy repeated, taking a step toward her, then seeming to think better of it. He smiled, albeit hesitantly. “Thank you. And you have no idea how sorry I am.”

“No, it’s my fault,” she sniffed. “I shouldn’t have fallen in love with you. I shouldn’t have hoped…” she paused, gave him a sideways glance. “There is no hope, right…?”

“No,” Teddy looked as though he were laughing to his own private joke. “Nice try, though.”

Victoire returned his smile, then took a deep, shaky breath and lifted her chin. “Right, then. I’m going to go drown my sorrows in pumpkin pasties and whatever tawdry soap opera I can find on the WWN. Don’t be surprised if, next time you see me, I am chubby and depressed.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if, next time I see you, you have another man eating out of the palm of your hands,” Teddy said honestly. “But I’ll go a couple of months without seeing you to give you the time to make it happen.”

Victoire stepped forward at the same time Teddy did and then they were hugging and James considered maybe leaving when Teddy’s eyes landed on him, narrowed, and widened. He let Victoire go and gaped. “How-how long-”

“Since she drew her wand,” James admitted meekly as Victoire whirled around to gape at him, too. “I’m sorry! Al was verbally shagging Malfoy right in front of me and I needed to get away, but then you two were fighting and you would have heard me Apparate out and-” he cut himself off before he said anything about how attractive Teddy was when angry. “Sorry!”

“I-I think I should go,” Victoire said, looking from Teddy to James uncertainly before heading for the floo. “Don’t you dare break his heart!”

Neither one had any idea which one of them she was talking to, but then she was throwing powder into the fireplace and screaming out the name of her family’s chateau in France and Teddy and James were noticeably alone.

“So,” James said helpfully. “I-”

“Hot chocolate and an explanation?” Teddy offered.

“Sounds good.”

They retired to the kitchen, where, with a wave of his wand, Teddy had the milk, hot chocolate instant mix, and already boiling kettle of water combining to form two steaming cups of hot chocolate. James Accioed the marshmallows and drowned his hot chocolate with them, grabbing a spoon and beginning the delicious task of fishing them all out again.

It should have been awkward, but it wasn’t. As easily as if they were talking about Quidditch matches or the latest product his Uncle George had put out, Teddy began to speak and James began to listen.

“I suppose Victoire more or less explained it all in our argument,” he said, sipping his hot chocolate gingerly. “I do fancy you, James, but you have to understand. I’m twenty-four. You’re seventeen and legal now, but before I could have gotten in a lot of trouble. Plus, you’re my godbrother-”

“We’re not blood related,” James said around a mouthful of marshmallows. “They wouldn’t have a case.”

Teddy grinned. “I was more worried about what Harry and Ginny would think, not to mention Al and Lily-and what Bill and Fleur are going to think about me dumping their daughter-”

“You shouldn’t have dated her to begin with. You should have just told me you fancied me. I would have waited.”

Teddy stared at him.

“Well,” James amended. “I would have been discreet.”

The stare intensified.

James sulked. “I hate it when you prove your point without saying anything.”

“This isn’t going to be easy,” Teddy said, solemn once again. “There are a lot of factors to consider. I’m seven years older than you-”

“I’m legal.”

“I’m a werewolf.”

“That hasn’t bothered me since I was five, if even then. I think I can handle it.”

“There’ll often be times when the color of the hair on top of my head doesn’t match the-”

“Now you’re just being ridiculous.”

“Yes,” Teddy said with a smile. “I am. I just… wasn’t expecting this to happen today. I was expecting Victoire to hex me and leave and to spend the night reading and imagining how this would go for the umpteenth time.”

“Let me help,” James pushed his cup of hot chocolate to the side and swung around to Teddy’s side of the table. “You get in a big fight and break up with my cousin, unaware that I’m watching the whole thing,” he straddled Teddy’s thighs, resting his hand’s on Teddy’s shoulders. “You take me to the kitchen and explain all about how hard it’s been for you to keep your forbidden love for me a secret,” Teddy’s eyes had fluttered closed in anticipation, but James merely breathed across his lips without touching them. “I tell you what an idiot you’ve been and then we snog until you forget anything your tongue remembers about any mouth that isn’t mine.”

Teddy suddenly leaned forward, closing the distance between their lips, and they were kissing. James tilted his head to the right, Teddy to the left, and the kiss deepened, lips parting, tongues moving against one another in a sensual stroke motions. James felt lightheaded and giddy, like seven years of wishing and hoping and dreaming and disappointment and frustration and jealousy and love, like every emotion that Teddy Lupin had ever evoked in him was concentrated into this single first kiss. His hands wandered across Teddy’s clothed chest and he felt Teddy’s hand sliding up under his shirt and he had to resist the urge to move on Teddy’s lap because the poor dear scared easily and James wanted this moment to be perfect.

They drew away slowly, almost reluctantly, and smiled simultaneously. James was breathing harder than was really necessary, but Teddy didn’t seem to notice or mind.

“This isn’t going to be easy,” he breathed, resting his forehead against Teddy’s and feeling his stomach flip as the boy’s smile widened. “I kick in my sleep.”

“There are spells for that.”

“I have no idea what I’m going to do with the rest of my life.”

“You’ve got plenty of time to figure it out.”

“I’m in love with you,” James closed his eyes so he wouldn’t have to see Teddy’s face, remembering quite well what had happened the last time he’d confessed his feelings.

Teddy kissed him for a very long time.

“I love you, too.”

James was nineteen and his cousin Victoire was a vindictive bint. It was her birthday dinner, being held at Grimmauld since she was there so often anyway, but, rather than having the entire family present, Victoire had insisted that only her mother and father, Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione, and James’ parents attend, in addition to, of course, their children, Scorpius and Teddy. James had found the request a little odd since Victoire loved Grandma Molly, but it was Victoire’s birthday, not his.

Then, just as everybody had begun to eat, she set down her fork and announced, “Teddy and James are dating.”

James choked on his pumpkin juice and Teddy accidentally cracked his plate cutting his chicken. “Victoire!” they said simultaneously, sealing their fates.

“YOU AND TEDDY ARE DATING?” his mother screamed first, glaring daggers at James.

“YOU’RE DATING MY SON?!” his father chimed in next, eyes on Teddy.

“Since James turned seventeen,” Victoire added helpfully. “Legality, you see.”

“Victoire!” James shouted. “What are you doing?”

She smiled placidly. “You told them all about me and Teddy. I think it’s only fair that I get to tell them about you and Teddy.”

His mother got to her feet, slamming her hands on the table. “YOU AND TEDDY HAVE BEEN DATING FOR TWO YEARS-”

His father followed suit on the other side of the table. “YOU WAITED FOR HIM TO TURN LEGAL BEFORE YOU-”

“OI, I CAN DATE WHOEVER I WANT-” James shouted over them, getting to his feet as well.

“Scorp and I are dating, too…” Al piped up in the middle of the melee.

“-DIDN’T EVEN BOTHER TO TELL US-”

“-VICTOIRE JUST A PLACEHOLDER-”

“…actually, we’ve been dating for awhile…”

“-NOT TEDDY’S FAULT I’M SO BLINDINGLY ATTRACTIVE-”

“-KNEW ABOUT THIS? I SWEAR IF YOU TOLD EVERYBODY BUT US-”

“-APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN FOR THE LAW BUT-”

“…I’m only telling you because we’re planning to move in together…”

“-AND I’M MOVING OUT OF GRIMMAULD TO LIVE WITH HIM!”

“WHAT?!” his parents shouted simultaneously.

Teddy paled. “James! Bad time, James!”

“And now we’re going to go up to my room to have hours of unsupervised shagging!” Al declared just as everybody fell silent. All eyes turned to him.

“Excuse me?” his mother blinked. “You’re going to what with who now?”

Scorpius cleared his throat, looking from the very red face of his boyfriend to the very pale faces of said boyfriend’s parents. “Er. We’re not really-um. Don’t tell my Dad, okay?”

“Al,” Teddy whispered. “When I said to wait for the right time to tell your parents, I didn’t mean a time when you thought they couldn’t hear you.”

Dad rubbed his face. “Okay, Teddy’s having it on with James and Al is apparently having it on with Malfoy Jr. Lily, please tell me we can at least expect some grandchildren from you.”

“I don’t know, Dad,” said Lily, trying hard not to laugh. “There’s this girl in Hufflepuff-”

Her parents groaned.

“Er, um,” Al’s voice was nothing more than a squeak. “Can Scorpius and I be excused?”

“Of course,” his mother said, exhausted. Al grabbed Scorpius’ hand and almost fell over himself in his haste to leave the room.

“LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN!” his father screamed after them. “IF I EVEN SUSPECT A SILENCING CHARM, YOU’LL BE GROUNDED!”

“I love this family,” Lily said happily, folding her hands and looking from her parents to Teddy and James and back again. “Let’s get on with the punishments, then, because I want to get to owl Rose before she turns in for bed.”

“Go to your room, Lily.”

“Awww, but Dad-” Lily’s protest died at the look her mother shot her. With a sour look on her face, she got up and left the room.

Sighing heavily, James’ parents fell back into their seats, exchanging glances. James sat down as well, feeling Teddy reach under the table to hold his hand and squeeze. He smiled.

“Do you love him?” his father asked Teddy.

“I do.”

“Do you love him?” his mother asked him.

“I do.”

“Then I now pronounce you man and-”

“GO TO YOUR ROOM, LILY!”

“Awww, Mom!”

They waited until the sound of footsteps faded up the stairs before James got up. “I should go and pack.”

“I’ll help,” Teddy volunteered, getting up as well. James looked to his parents for permission and they both smiled and nodded. He walked around the table and gave Teddy a chaste kiss on the cheek before leading him out of the room and toward the stairs. “Again, when I imagined this moment, this is not exactly the way it went.”

“It could have been worse,” James said, grinning. “Lily really could have turned out to prefer girls. I think Grandma Molly might cry. She’d love great-grandchildren.”

Teddy hummed innocently. “It’s not too late for me and Victoire to-”

“Don’t make me hurt you.”

They reached the top of the stairs and James was somehow unsurprised to see Lily sitting there trying desperately to hide a pair of Extendable Ears. He ruffled her hair. “You make me proud to be a Potter. Al not so much.”

Lily giggled nervously. “Don’t tell Mum and Dad.”

James laughed and let Teddy pull him up the stairs to his bedroom, close and lock the door, and cast a Silencing Charm. He grinned. “Why, Mr. Lupin, I do believe you’re-”

“Planning to shag you through the carpeting? Very perceptive of you,” Teddy said, grinning back as he backed James up against the door and leaned down to give him a kiss. “Blindingly attractive, huh?”

“I’m not blind,” James replied, meeting the second kiss head on. “And neither are you.”

Teddy seemed like he was about to retort, so James held his face and deepened the kiss until they both forgot what they were talking about. He’d have to remember to thank Victoire for getting the two hardest parts of their relationship out of the way for them. After he killed her, of course.

THE END

x-posted to teddyjames.