-i need you more than anything in my life-
I made this for Yoshii for when he got back from his 6week deploy...Which was like a week ago. But I showed it to him, and then forgot to post it public...So here you go...You should read it. It's awesome!
February 7th 2006
February 11th 2006
1st e-mail from him after he left for his deployment to Germany.
I like this one cuz at the end it says, "luv". Notice toward the end how much better it gets than just, "luv". Tehe. :o)
"Last night, I fell asleep listening to Paul Van Dyk: Politics in Dancing 2”, and amidst my dreaming, I could still hear the tunes. I dreamt we were laying in bed again but, instead of being at Walker’s, we were at my mother’s, in the fall season. Nobody was home except for me and you… it was nice. Cool breeze through the
window, soft sheet to cover us. Both of us cuddled up and half asleep, whispering back and forth to one another...
Thoughts of you have been keeping me going through this deployment, usually, I'd be down… real down. This time around, it’s more melancholy, sorta borderline
Between both, cuz I miss you, and the other cuz I know that I have an amazing woman waiting for my return"
February 13th 2006
"*chokes on water* Okay, so there’s a new picture of Ms. Kittie in my photobucket ._. No fair, you're only making lil Yosh over here even more anxious. :D"
"The memory of the weekend we got to spend together before my deployment replays through my mind... how your hand beckoned for mine, the moment of the first kiss, how when you fell asleep, you always moved back into my arms when one of us moved, how we seemed to make each other laughing about something (because of our perverted humor, and crazy behavior), your nails in my side, how you playfully bit my lip back, how we layed there for hours, whispering back and forth, cuddled together, scared for when that alarm clock were to go off...
The beach...
How you smiled when you gave me the heart sign with your hands as I walked away, and I shouted "I love you~", not knowing that my Lieutenant and Chief were standing right behind me... only to question me why I was late that morning as you both drove off... lol
Late night phone calls... usually ranging from 9pm till 4 or 5 am
You were so upset the night before I left, the tone in your voice bout sent me into tears.
I love her so."
February 14th 2006
"At last, when all the summer shine
that warmed life's early hours is past,
Your loving fingers seek for mine
and hold them close at last
Not oft the robin comes to build
its nest upon the leafless bough
By autumn robbed, by winter chilled,
but you, dear heart, you love me now.
Though there are shadows on my brow
and furrows on my cheek, in truth,
The marks where Time's remorseless plough
broke up the blooming sward of Youth,
Though fled is every girlish grace
might win or hold a lover's vow,
Despite my sad and faded face,
and darkened heart, you love me now!
I count no more my wasted tears;
they left no echo of their fall;
I mourn no more my lonesome years;
this blessed hour atones for all.
I fear not all that Time or Fate
may bring to burden heart or brow,
Strong in the love that came so late,
our souls shall keep it always now
Happy Valentine’s Day babe…
I love you so
*kisses*
-David"
"Sleeping has been hard
When I sleep, I dream of you.
When I'm awake, I think of you.
Another day has gone by, another day closer to coming home, to you. I wish I could say” don't be sad” but, then again, who am I to say when I too, am sad. Being away makes me this way… but, the thought of coming home to you brings me hope.
The thought makes me glow…"
February 15th 2006
February 18th 2006
"Sorry for the dorky, random email but, when I was on watch, I thought of what it'd be like coming home in April…
I'm all giddy… I can't wait to spend time with you.
See you smile
Kiss you
Cuddle you
Nuzzle you
Fall asleep with you in my arms
Wake up with you in my arms
Feel your love and affection
...amongst other things...
BAH! I'm all anxious *blush*
Okay, off to bed I go. Sweetest of dreams to you, love ya babe!
-David"
February 21st 2006
"Wincko: *looks at the wall of my rack (bed), spotting a picture of you* O.O *pokes Scheffel*
Meh: What’s up man?
Wincko: Is that your girl?
Meh: Yeah. *smile*
Wincko: Man! Your girlfriend’s hot dude!
Meh: I know, she’s gorgeous, and she’s the sweetest :D
Wincko: “Those are hard to find!
Meh: I know, right?"
February 22nd 2006
"To my Blue Eyed Baby Girl,
There’s no problem with wanting kids before 30, I'm just saying once my enlistment is up (which we'll be 23), it’s open season (lol, that’s one way to put it), because I want to be there for you and the child/children, not be stuck out somewhere because of some deployment, having the Navy run my life, when really, I should be there, it’s just something in me that wants it that way no matter what, I need to be there.
The 9 months of pregnancy, I've heard guys on the ship talking about getting their wives pregnant right before they go on deployment, so they won't have to deal with their wives being pregnant while they're gone, and for some reason, that just urked the shit outta me. Why wouldn't a man fulfill his role and be there for the one he loves? That 9 months is crucial, it’s not like you'll have it easy being pregnant (because no woman does), thus why I NEED to be there.
I hope all that made sense.
My love is unconditional, I love you for who you are Liz, and I want you in my life… need you in my life… I have needed you in my life, for what I've been searching for, finding that it is you after all that time… whether you believe me or not.
I love you so much… more than I can possibly ever explain.
Yours forever,
-David"
"Yosh: Sex: O.O;; I really don't know which angle to approach this one on… help me out here? ^.^;;
Liz: Any ways...I think it's cute you don't know what angle to approach it at. **giggles** Whatever angle you think it'll feel the best going in
Yosh: a few things come to mind… *pulls you closer*"
February 26th 2006
"Something really goofy happened today… I walked into the living quarters to grab something outta my rack, and this guy who was on the sound powered telephone next to me looked away from my rack and then looked at me, *grin* Is that your wife? being half awake, smiling, and without hesitation, I said "Yes" and walked out of the living quarters cuz I was kinda in a hurry, then it hit me… he said wife! *puts hands over face, rubs his eyes* wow. ^^;;"
February 27th 2006
"God, I'm nothing without you, you make me complete.
I love you… oh dear god, I love you so.
*tugs on your shirt, puppy eyed look; pulls you under the covers with him, cuddles you*"
February 28th 2006
"...especially when I have high levels of Oxytocin! :D lol
NOW LETS CUDDLE! XD
I love you babe! ^_^
High on Oxytocin,
-David"
"Liz: Ummm...No, seriously. I can't even explain to anyone how happy you make me. I've never felt this way about anyone. Not even Braden. That's why I don't fuckin get it...I never thought I'd be in-love again after Braden...I dunno. Wow...Grrrr!! ...Wow. Ummm...I'm getting choked up. This isn't suppose to happen to me.
Yosh: it’s kinda funny how ironic it is… cuz I've never felt so close to anyone, I feel this amazing, unbreakable, loving bond with you, as if it was meant to be. I'm so comfortable with you, so happy with you, so in love with you… and I was convinced before hand that I was destined alone. *shakes head* wow, I was so wrong."
March 1st 2006
"Liz: Thinking I could actually mean something to someone, for real. N forever. I won't have to die alone...
Yosh: I never thought I'd have that either, because everything in the past relationships were just obscured reflections of what I gave, none of which were actual feeling or meaning from the other, so 1 sided, and jaded. I was convinced after awhile that I was meant to be alone because how I am and the how the world around me is (thus, the discussion you had with Holly, I was being serious when I told her that). Then you came… and everything from then went out the window, because it had lost all meaning. All the past relationships didn't matter, you make me so happy that, I don't even think about any of it… that hopeless feeling of being alone forever disappeared, because my angel had finally been sent by God. I no longer have this nagging feeling that something’s wrong, or that it’s too good to be true… because it feels so right, and for once, I'm not afraid.
Liz: I'll never have to worry about being cheated on or left for someone better, cuz there's no one better than me in your eyes.
Yosh: AND the fact that there is no one better than you period. No one will treat me like you do, no one will love me like you do, no one is as gorgeous as you, no one is better to have around than you, no one lets me feel close like you do, it seems that our being is coexistent, that everything we do compliments one another.
As far as cheating goes, I wouldn't commit myself to someone if I didn't believe that they were significant in some way, shape, or form. I don't set myself up for cheating, it’s outside of what I believe in and naturally do."
March 2nd 2006
He'll never even know if I'm serious. **giggles**
March 5th 2006
March 7th 2006
"And then the ladies are all like “OMG%@$#% YO5H11, TocUh MEH wheR iT sMEElss funneh!” j/k"
March 11th 2006
March 13th 2006
"I just wanna call Liz, talk to her. Fuck man, screw these people, if they tell me to go with'em again, I'll fuck'em in the face. Cuz I'm not doin' anything else until I get to talk to babeh doll. period."
March 15th 2006
March 17th 2006
"To my blue eyed baby girl,
I miss the warmth of being close to you
I miss your hand in mine
I miss your tenderness of your touch, your embrace, your kiss
I miss seeing the glow you had when you came around me
I miss holding you
I miss being taped to a chair with you
I miss laying in bed, cuddling you, your head on my chest
I miss how every time we moved in bed, we'd shift back to each other… every time
I miss waking up late at night, us whispering back and forth to each other in the dark
I miss you waking up in my arms
I miss you being happy
I miss the late night phone calls
I miss hearing your voice
I miss hearing the sincerity in your voice when you said “I love you”
I miss that cute tone in your voice before I had to leave for this deployment
I miss the things we used to talk about
I miss how you always had me laughing with the randomness
I miss the IM’s
I miss the messages you'd leave on my IM while I was sleeping/working
I miss the text messages
I miss the emails
I miss you
When I on was on the train tonight, coming back from Bremen, and I couldn't help but stare out the window, thinking to myself. I'm coming home, I'll be able to see my Liz finally. I'll be able to hold her, I'll be able to kiss her, I'll be able to cuddle her at night, I'll be able to see her smile, I'll be able to. Just thinking of everything with us, what happened, and what lay ahead. I couldn't help but stare out the window, with a grin on my face. Since I left, that was the very first time I felt happy. I'm coming home to you you have no idea how happy I am at this moment in time. *sighs of relief* and for once, since I've left, I can breath without my chest feeling so heavy.
God… I've awaited this day, I thought it'd never come… I am this close to holding you once again.
It’s only a matter of time dear.
Forever yours… (sealed with a promise),
-David"
February 7th 2006
February 11th 2006
1st e-mail from him after he left for his deployment to Germany.
I like this one cuz at the end it says, "luv". Notice toward the end how much better it gets than just, "luv". Tehe. :o)
"Last night, I fell asleep listening to Paul Van Dyk: Politics in Dancing 2”, and amidst my dreaming, I could still hear the tunes. I dreamt we were laying in bed again but, instead of being at Walker’s, we were at my mother’s, in the fall season. Nobody was home except for me and you… it was nice. Cool breeze through the
window, soft sheet to cover us. Both of us cuddled up and half asleep, whispering back and forth to one another...
Thoughts of you have been keeping me going through this deployment, usually, I'd be down… real down. This time around, it’s more melancholy, sorta borderline
Between both, cuz I miss you, and the other cuz I know that I have an amazing woman waiting for my return"
February 13th 2006
"*chokes on water* Okay, so there’s a new picture of Ms. Kittie in my photobucket ._. No fair, you're only making lil Yosh over here even more anxious. :D"
"The memory of the weekend we got to spend together before my deployment replays through my mind... how your hand beckoned for mine, the moment of the first kiss, how when you fell asleep, you always moved back into my arms when one of us moved, how we seemed to make each other laughing about something (because of our perverted humor, and crazy behavior), your nails in my side, how you playfully bit my lip back, how we layed there for hours, whispering back and forth, cuddled together, scared for when that alarm clock were to go off...
The beach...
How you smiled when you gave me the heart sign with your hands as I walked away, and I shouted "I love you~", not knowing that my Lieutenant and Chief were standing right behind me... only to question me why I was late that morning as you both drove off... lol
Late night phone calls... usually ranging from 9pm till 4 or 5 am
You were so upset the night before I left, the tone in your voice bout sent me into tears.
I love her so."
February 14th 2006
"At last, when all the summer shine
that warmed life's early hours is past,
Your loving fingers seek for mine
and hold them close at last
Not oft the robin comes to build
its nest upon the leafless bough
By autumn robbed, by winter chilled,
but you, dear heart, you love me now.
Though there are shadows on my brow
and furrows on my cheek, in truth,
The marks where Time's remorseless plough
broke up the blooming sward of Youth,
Though fled is every girlish grace
might win or hold a lover's vow,
Despite my sad and faded face,
and darkened heart, you love me now!
I count no more my wasted tears;
they left no echo of their fall;
I mourn no more my lonesome years;
this blessed hour atones for all.
I fear not all that Time or Fate
may bring to burden heart or brow,
Strong in the love that came so late,
our souls shall keep it always now
Happy Valentine’s Day babe…
I love you so
*kisses*
-David"
"Sleeping has been hard
When I sleep, I dream of you.
When I'm awake, I think of you.
Another day has gone by, another day closer to coming home, to you. I wish I could say” don't be sad” but, then again, who am I to say when I too, am sad. Being away makes me this way… but, the thought of coming home to you brings me hope.
The thought makes me glow…"
February 15th 2006
February 18th 2006
"Sorry for the dorky, random email but, when I was on watch, I thought of what it'd be like coming home in April…
I'm all giddy… I can't wait to spend time with you.
See you smile
Kiss you
Cuddle you
Nuzzle you
Fall asleep with you in my arms
Wake up with you in my arms
Feel your love and affection
...amongst other things...
BAH! I'm all anxious *blush*
Okay, off to bed I go. Sweetest of dreams to you, love ya babe!
-David"
February 21st 2006
"Wincko: *looks at the wall of my rack (bed), spotting a picture of you* O.O *pokes Scheffel*
Meh: What’s up man?
Wincko: Is that your girl?
Meh: Yeah. *smile*
Wincko: Man! Your girlfriend’s hot dude!
Meh: I know, she’s gorgeous, and she’s the sweetest :D
Wincko: “Those are hard to find!
Meh: I know, right?"
February 22nd 2006
"To my Blue Eyed Baby Girl,
There’s no problem with wanting kids before 30, I'm just saying once my enlistment is up (which we'll be 23), it’s open season (lol, that’s one way to put it), because I want to be there for you and the child/children, not be stuck out somewhere because of some deployment, having the Navy run my life, when really, I should be there, it’s just something in me that wants it that way no matter what, I need to be there.
The 9 months of pregnancy, I've heard guys on the ship talking about getting their wives pregnant right before they go on deployment, so they won't have to deal with their wives being pregnant while they're gone, and for some reason, that just urked the shit outta me. Why wouldn't a man fulfill his role and be there for the one he loves? That 9 months is crucial, it’s not like you'll have it easy being pregnant (because no woman does), thus why I NEED to be there.
I hope all that made sense.
My love is unconditional, I love you for who you are Liz, and I want you in my life… need you in my life… I have needed you in my life, for what I've been searching for, finding that it is you after all that time… whether you believe me or not.
I love you so much… more than I can possibly ever explain.
Yours forever,
-David"
"Yosh: Sex: O.O;; I really don't know which angle to approach this one on… help me out here? ^.^;;
Liz: Any ways...I think it's cute you don't know what angle to approach it at. **giggles** Whatever angle you think it'll feel the best going in
Yosh: a few things come to mind… *pulls you closer*"
February 26th 2006
"Something really goofy happened today… I walked into the living quarters to grab something outta my rack, and this guy who was on the sound powered telephone next to me looked away from my rack and then looked at me, *grin* Is that your wife? being half awake, smiling, and without hesitation, I said "Yes" and walked out of the living quarters cuz I was kinda in a hurry, then it hit me… he said wife! *puts hands over face, rubs his eyes* wow. ^^;;"
February 27th 2006
"God, I'm nothing without you, you make me complete.
I love you… oh dear god, I love you so.
*tugs on your shirt, puppy eyed look; pulls you under the covers with him, cuddles you*"
February 28th 2006
"...especially when I have high levels of Oxytocin! :D lol
NOW LETS CUDDLE! XD
I love you babe! ^_^
High on Oxytocin,
-David"
"Liz: Ummm...No, seriously. I can't even explain to anyone how happy you make me. I've never felt this way about anyone. Not even Braden. That's why I don't fuckin get it...I never thought I'd be in-love again after Braden...I dunno. Wow...Grrrr!! ...Wow. Ummm...I'm getting choked up. This isn't suppose to happen to me.
Yosh: it’s kinda funny how ironic it is… cuz I've never felt so close to anyone, I feel this amazing, unbreakable, loving bond with you, as if it was meant to be. I'm so comfortable with you, so happy with you, so in love with you… and I was convinced before hand that I was destined alone. *shakes head* wow, I was so wrong."
March 1st 2006
"Liz: Thinking I could actually mean something to someone, for real. N forever. I won't have to die alone...
Yosh: I never thought I'd have that either, because everything in the past relationships were just obscured reflections of what I gave, none of which were actual feeling or meaning from the other, so 1 sided, and jaded. I was convinced after awhile that I was meant to be alone because how I am and the how the world around me is (thus, the discussion you had with Holly, I was being serious when I told her that). Then you came… and everything from then went out the window, because it had lost all meaning. All the past relationships didn't matter, you make me so happy that, I don't even think about any of it… that hopeless feeling of being alone forever disappeared, because my angel had finally been sent by God. I no longer have this nagging feeling that something’s wrong, or that it’s too good to be true… because it feels so right, and for once, I'm not afraid.
Liz: I'll never have to worry about being cheated on or left for someone better, cuz there's no one better than me in your eyes.
Yosh: AND the fact that there is no one better than you period. No one will treat me like you do, no one will love me like you do, no one is as gorgeous as you, no one is better to have around than you, no one lets me feel close like you do, it seems that our being is coexistent, that everything we do compliments one another.
As far as cheating goes, I wouldn't commit myself to someone if I didn't believe that they were significant in some way, shape, or form. I don't set myself up for cheating, it’s outside of what I believe in and naturally do."
March 2nd 2006
He'll never even know if I'm serious. **giggles**
March 5th 2006
March 7th 2006
"And then the ladies are all like “OMG%@$#% YO5H11, TocUh MEH wheR iT sMEElss funneh!” j/k"
March 11th 2006
March 13th 2006
"I just wanna call Liz, talk to her. Fuck man, screw these people, if they tell me to go with'em again, I'll fuck'em in the face. Cuz I'm not doin' anything else until I get to talk to babeh doll. period."
March 15th 2006
March 17th 2006
"To my blue eyed baby girl,
I miss the warmth of being close to you
I miss your hand in mine
I miss your tenderness of your touch, your embrace, your kiss
I miss seeing the glow you had when you came around me
I miss holding you
I miss being taped to a chair with you
I miss laying in bed, cuddling you, your head on my chest
I miss how every time we moved in bed, we'd shift back to each other… every time
I miss waking up late at night, us whispering back and forth to each other in the dark
I miss you waking up in my arms
I miss you being happy
I miss the late night phone calls
I miss hearing your voice
I miss hearing the sincerity in your voice when you said “I love you”
I miss that cute tone in your voice before I had to leave for this deployment
I miss the things we used to talk about
I miss how you always had me laughing with the randomness
I miss the IM’s
I miss the messages you'd leave on my IM while I was sleeping/working
I miss the text messages
I miss the emails
I miss you
When I on was on the train tonight, coming back from Bremen, and I couldn't help but stare out the window, thinking to myself. I'm coming home, I'll be able to see my Liz finally. I'll be able to hold her, I'll be able to kiss her, I'll be able to cuddle her at night, I'll be able to see her smile, I'll be able to. Just thinking of everything with us, what happened, and what lay ahead. I couldn't help but stare out the window, with a grin on my face. Since I left, that was the very first time I felt happy. I'm coming home to you you have no idea how happy I am at this moment in time. *sighs of relief* and for once, since I've left, I can breath without my chest feeling so heavy.
God… I've awaited this day, I thought it'd never come… I am this close to holding you once again.
It’s only a matter of time dear.
Forever yours… (sealed with a promise),
-David"