Rant: I'm Leaving / Ryutaro, how are you? :'(
So..I'm leaving the U.S. in a week. Yeah, bye bye Miami. I've known for a while, 2 months exactly. But we're been so busy getting ready to leave, and then I've been so busy dreading leaving that I haven't been able to work on my fanfic... :( but as soon as I have more time, I intend to finish it up. I really have no idea when that's gonna happen...When I go back to Trinidad, i think things are definitely DEFINITELY going to get worse. Mostly because schooling in the U.S. is much less difficult than it is in Trinidad, considering Trinidad has British education. So THAT'S gonna be absolutely positively no fun. I'm probably gonna have to go back a couple of grades too, because the biggest exam ever in Trinidad would be the one I would have to take if I went ahead with the others in my age group so... I'm going to end up staying in school longer than anybody else, meaning that i'll end up going to college and graduating later than anyone else. EFF MY FREAKING LIFE DUDE. I HATE THIS. but apparently i have to go back to deal with all this stuff, if i don't fail and drop out of school from it being too difficult for me to even handle.
So yeah, basically i'm screwed for the next couple of years. Yay me. Whoop dee frickin' doo.
I'm really gonna miss all my friends. I mean, i came here when I was eleven. And now i'm seventeen and i have to leave? My teenage years are the most important years of my life to make friends, right? Most of the people I care about live here. There are my family members who I really wanna see...but I'd rather go home just for vacation, not to actually LIVE. Not that Trinidad is like a bad country or anything ( of course it has its bad areas like every other country), but its a very wealthy Caribbean country, probably one of the wealthiest in the Caribbean. But the place that we're going to live isn't one of those great areas, and then I'm really not looking forward to having to be on the lookout for everything I own out of fear that the people I grew up with (well from birth till i was eleven) will steal it! JEEZ, this is the worst.
More than anything, i really hope my friends know that i love them very much, and I'm gonna miss them more than anything. And especially the chior i was in while being in high school. I mean, i have to leave not only right before i became a senior, but also I was supposed to become the President of the Chorus at my school, and be in the Board of Directors for Music Club. This SUCKS. Really. I was finally getting to claim something, something that would prove how hard I've worked in the things I care about, but can i have them? NO. I know life isn't fair but this is just some straight up bull. I hate my life so much right now, really.
AND my dad wants to stay here in the U.S., so I won't get to see him anymore. That is possibly the ABSOLUTE WORST PART of it all. My father, I won't get to see him everyday. I have one more week left until I won't get to see my dad anymore....
All i can say is :'(
I'm gonna miss my dad. I love him so so so so so so so so so so much. My dad is possibly the best father I could've ever asked for, and I wouldn't trade him for the whole world or anything in it. So you can imagine how much I'm gonna miss him. I know he has a good reason for staying here though. I know that he's staying for the sakes of my, my sister and my brother. Staying here means that he can support us better than he ever could if he came back to Trinidad with us, it's easier for us to come back here if need be, and there's more of a chance of our dreams coming true. He's doing it all for us. And i could tell he was telling the truth when he said that because when I got upset at the thought of him leaving and started crying, he started tearing up himself. I never realized how much I love my dad. He's the best.
So yeah. I've been trying to think positive, because as my dad says, you never know what to expect, so don't make yourself all worried before anything even happens.Worrying is what I do though, so its kind of tough being optimistic in such a pessimistic situation. The only good things i can think of are, seeing people i haven't seen in years, and finally getting to decorate my room however i want to. (Of course i still share my room with my sister so...it can't be COMPLETELY how i want it to be. Ah the troubles of sharing. Oh well, my sis is cool, as long as she tries to be cleaner cause she's really messy).
I definitely am going to focus on my dreams more than anything, more than school even, since school is gonna suck anyway. My dream is the biggest thing to look forward to. Wow, i must sound lame. oh well.
So I'm going to miss the U.S. A lot. Especially the fact that school is so much easier here :) so umm...yeah. my rant is done.
Okay, so on to my rant about Ryutaro. I miss him. A LOT. Um, I really want him to come back, but apparently we fans have another three months to wait And its KILLING ME. Really. It's funny. Actually no, not at all. It's not funny, i hate this. RYUU NEEDS TO COME BACK. Understand that he needs to be punished, he did do wrong but...why do the fans have to pay too? We miss him! All we did was love him and the other boys, we shouldn't be punished! Ryuu isn't even my ichiban and I miss him so much, so i can imagine how horrible it must be for those who actually do have him as their ichiban. it must be HORRIBLE. What i think that Mr. Johnny Kitagawa-san should at LEAST provide us with, is pictures. I mean, like just one every month or every two weeks or something. More than anything, I'm wondering, is Ryuu okay? Is he still smiling? Is he happy? Is he sick? How is he? I think the pictures and videos and interviews of the boys are also a reassurance that our Johnny's are doing well, and that they're not sick or anything. Recently, the papa pics that came up of the boys are of Yamada, Nakajima, Chinen and even Tanaka Juri, but not of Ryuu? Did he change schools or what??? Jeez, i'd like reassurance, just to know that he's okay.
So yea.This was my rant. :) Goodbye now, my mom keeps bugging me to go pack up books and stuff.
So yeah, basically i'm screwed for the next couple of years. Yay me. Whoop dee frickin' doo.
I'm really gonna miss all my friends. I mean, i came here when I was eleven. And now i'm seventeen and i have to leave? My teenage years are the most important years of my life to make friends, right? Most of the people I care about live here. There are my family members who I really wanna see...but I'd rather go home just for vacation, not to actually LIVE. Not that Trinidad is like a bad country or anything ( of course it has its bad areas like every other country), but its a very wealthy Caribbean country, probably one of the wealthiest in the Caribbean. But the place that we're going to live isn't one of those great areas, and then I'm really not looking forward to having to be on the lookout for everything I own out of fear that the people I grew up with (well from birth till i was eleven) will steal it! JEEZ, this is the worst.
More than anything, i really hope my friends know that i love them very much, and I'm gonna miss them more than anything. And especially the chior i was in while being in high school. I mean, i have to leave not only right before i became a senior, but also I was supposed to become the President of the Chorus at my school, and be in the Board of Directors for Music Club. This SUCKS. Really. I was finally getting to claim something, something that would prove how hard I've worked in the things I care about, but can i have them? NO. I know life isn't fair but this is just some straight up bull. I hate my life so much right now, really.
AND my dad wants to stay here in the U.S., so I won't get to see him anymore. That is possibly the ABSOLUTE WORST PART of it all. My father, I won't get to see him everyday. I have one more week left until I won't get to see my dad anymore....
All i can say is :'(
I'm gonna miss my dad. I love him so so so so so so so so so so much. My dad is possibly the best father I could've ever asked for, and I wouldn't trade him for the whole world or anything in it. So you can imagine how much I'm gonna miss him. I know he has a good reason for staying here though. I know that he's staying for the sakes of my, my sister and my brother. Staying here means that he can support us better than he ever could if he came back to Trinidad with us, it's easier for us to come back here if need be, and there's more of a chance of our dreams coming true. He's doing it all for us. And i could tell he was telling the truth when he said that because when I got upset at the thought of him leaving and started crying, he started tearing up himself. I never realized how much I love my dad. He's the best.
So yeah. I've been trying to think positive, because as my dad says, you never know what to expect, so don't make yourself all worried before anything even happens.Worrying is what I do though, so its kind of tough being optimistic in such a pessimistic situation. The only good things i can think of are, seeing people i haven't seen in years, and finally getting to decorate my room however i want to. (Of course i still share my room with my sister so...it can't be COMPLETELY how i want it to be. Ah the troubles of sharing. Oh well, my sis is cool, as long as she tries to be cleaner cause she's really messy).
I definitely am going to focus on my dreams more than anything, more than school even, since school is gonna suck anyway. My dream is the biggest thing to look forward to. Wow, i must sound lame. oh well.
So I'm going to miss the U.S. A lot. Especially the fact that school is so much easier here :) so umm...yeah. my rant is done.
Okay, so on to my rant about Ryutaro. I miss him. A LOT. Um, I really want him to come back, but apparently we fans have another three months to wait And its KILLING ME. Really. It's funny. Actually no, not at all. It's not funny, i hate this. RYUU NEEDS TO COME BACK. Understand that he needs to be punished, he did do wrong but...why do the fans have to pay too? We miss him! All we did was love him and the other boys, we shouldn't be punished! Ryuu isn't even my ichiban and I miss him so much, so i can imagine how horrible it must be for those who actually do have him as their ichiban. it must be HORRIBLE. What i think that Mr. Johnny Kitagawa-san should at LEAST provide us with, is pictures. I mean, like just one every month or every two weeks or something. More than anything, I'm wondering, is Ryuu okay? Is he still smiling? Is he happy? Is he sick? How is he? I think the pictures and videos and interviews of the boys are also a reassurance that our Johnny's are doing well, and that they're not sick or anything. Recently, the papa pics that came up of the boys are of Yamada, Nakajima, Chinen and even Tanaka Juri, but not of Ryuu? Did he change schools or what??? Jeez, i'd like reassurance, just to know that he's okay.
So yea.This was my rant. :) Goodbye now, my mom keeps bugging me to go pack up books and stuff.