A recipe for the easiest possible sauce Hollandaise (Am I doing this SEO thing right?) It's like Hollandaise only slightly debased, if possible, and a bit artificial---but very clean and efficient. We avoid both curdling and unnecessary washing up by using the microwave and eschewing fancy acid reductions.

Ingredients for one greedy and one ( Read more... )

A good spontaneous spoonerism is a hard-to-fake muck-up.

Come bomber, clad like slob in hood ( Read more... )

The epitaph of Martinus von Biberach (d. 1498):

Ich leb und waiss nit, wie lang,
Ich stirb und waiss nit, wann,
Ich far und waiss nit, wohin,
Mich wundert, dass ich froelich bin.

I live, but don't know for how long.
I'll die, whenever that may be;
I'll go to---where? Where I belong.
I'm happy. It's a mystery.

...And all should cry Beware! Beware!
His flashing eyes, his floating hair!
For he is wearing Van de Graaff's
Designer underwear.

This explains its own context, if you can bear to look carefully. I'm not sure I recommend it.

Your loves will last forever, like the greatest loves before 'em ( Read more... )

"I never reared a young Gazelle"

Tell me not, Sheep, I am unkind,
    That, from Montgomery
And thee, Chaste Beast---to try a Hind
    With Wellingtons I fly.

True, a new mistress now I chase,
    The first Doe in the Field;
Or with a stronger faith embrace
    A Sow, a Horse, a Seal.

Yet this in Scotland, see, is such
    As thou to me before:
( Read more... )

Which is the appropriate Hindu deity to call upon for help in adjusting cantilever brakes? Divine assistance is certainly needed and it would help if it came with a few extra arms.

The Buddhists revere a bodhisattva who embodies the willingness of all the Buddhas to step in with maintenance and repairs, Avalokatitforya.

First they came for the dumb, and I said nothing, because I was not dumb ( Read more... )

Replies to the poets: Robert Frost ( Read more... )