OPEN omg be gentle!!

[hometownjam]

[New Jersey is standing in the middle of the rec room holding a bundle of wires and taking off a thick, nerdy pair of glasses.]

Oh my gosh, you guys. You guys! Who set the TiVo to record Jersey Shore? If you 'fess up now I won't kill you and dump your body in the Pine Barrens, a unique and diverse habitat by the way!

I bet it was New York!

Comments

[hymeneals]

[attention perked. not by Jersey Shore, but by that there ruined TiVo. have a Belarus, seemingly out of nowhere. it's almost like she just sort of appeared out of the walls.]

...You destroyed the television? [peering at the wires.]

[hometownjam]

No way!

[waving the wires]

I totally just took out the connection. I'm not gonna destroy a perfectly good TiVo! What if HBO offers the Sopranos on demand? Then what would we do without a TiVo?

[hymeneals]

[so disappoint...] What is the point of TiVo? It's only a distraction for slovenly, disgusting, doglike Americans while they continue to avoid their work.

[hometownjam]

Don't hate! The little mascot they have is cute...

[is getting up in your face because she has no concept of personal space]

And I do tons of work! Way more than New York!

[sheroic]

It was me, obviously! I thought you would want to watch it, 'cause I'm sure it's your favorite show, right?

[hometownjam]

O M G

I am going to kill you and dump your body in the Pine Barrens!

[sheroic]

Is that what you guys say right before watching Jersey Shore? Cool! OK... wait, what happened to the TV?

[hometownjam]

[grimly holds up the wires]

I disconnected it from the TiVo. I'll put it back if you agree to watch the Sopranos!

[itsafreshfish]

Jersey Shore?

Who would want to watch a show about a beach where everyone dumps their sports jerseys after they're done with them?