Please Comment

[huntergatherer9]

Which hypothetical scenario would you choose and why?

1.  You are married by age 30 or 35 or whatever age feels optimal to you to a person that you think the world of.  A short time after this you have whatever your desired number of children is with said individual (even if its zero), and said children are wonderfully healthy, intelligent, and

Comments

[eckles]

It may be more helpful to talk about where we fall on a continuum between the two of these. I, for example, really do not want either, but fall somewhere between the two and perhaps three-quarters of the way toward (2). I want to be badass at my job, I really don't know if I want children, but I do want to be married, potentially to someone in the same kind of life position such that we understand each other and do not necessarily have a "house-together-with-2.5-children-and-a-dog" marriage. I'm not even sure if I ever want to own a house.

[eckles]

Fine, fine. If we really have to pick, I do have to go with (1), mostly because of this caveat in (2): "you never marry. Not only do you not marry, all of the relationships you ever enter into seem to fizzle by the time you hit the one year mark. You have plenty of friends of both genders, but romantically nothing ever seems to hold together for lots of different reasons."

Quite simply, no.

[snowscythe]

If i had to choose, I'd pick 1; it does sound rather bland but leaves time for things outside of my job. Ideally: 1 except that I am fairly badass at my job and have enough money or time to do some kind of philanthropy. I don't have to be the world's shining star though.

[jgranhill]

Although many people will probably be inclined to take #2, psychological studies tend to show that #1 will make a person happier. Of course, inter-personal utility comparison are generally futile, and there are differences enough in people, so there's not a right or wrong answer to this.

In brief, I would choose #1 if it really came down between it all. Unfortunately, I think much of what we are made to do is directed at accomplishing #2.

[asenseofwonder]

1, hands down. Money is only important because I don't want to live in a shack. If I can live comfortably and travel from time to time, I could care less about how much I make.

[zifnabxar]

If it's pre-determined that both would make me equally as happy, I'd pick 2 because then I'd be happy and help people.

However, if the hypothetical situation is such that one might not make me more happy and I have to choose the one I would prefer, I'm not sure which I'd pick. The best a person can ask for are love and work and this question seems to be asking me to pick between the two. I guess 1 gives love and some work, while 2 just gives work. I'd be much more inclined to pick 1 if the work was more than just "generally interests," most things generally interest me, but I'd hate to do them my whole life. 1 would be more likely to make me more happy, but I'm not sure what I'd do. Would it be possible to pass on the money from 2 and get the love from 1?

[eckles]

For me it's not even the money, it's the sense of accomplishment and the ability to help people. Maybe it's naive and idealistic, but I feel like after putting a lot of work into learning so much for so long, I'd like to put it to use for something.

Not that the money would be terrible though.

[asenseofwonder]

Yeah but it sounds like from what Nick put its based mostly on 1) money and 2) recognition.
The best things you will ever do for people in life probably won't ever get you either.

[huntergatherer9]

I actually totally foresaw Mary's point (and indeed that it would be Mary that would make it), so I'm not sure why I didn't further clarify