(no subject)
This is a letter Bette Midler (whom I adore) wrote to President Bush on gay marriage. A friend of mine posted it in her journal, and I agree with her when she says "it's too well written not to share."
Enjoy.
Dear President Bush,
Today you called upon Congress to move quickly to amend the US
Constitution, and set in Federal stone a legal definition of marriage.
I would like to know why.
In your speech, you stated that this Amendment would serve to protect
marriage in America, which I must confess confuses me. Like you, I
believe in the importance of marriage and I feel that we as a society
take the institution far too lightly. In my circle of family, friends
and acquaintances, the vast majority have married and divorced - some
more than once. Still, I believe in marriage. I believe that there is
something fundamental about finding another person on this planet with
whom you want to build a life and family, and make a positive
contribution to society. I believe that we need more positive role
models for successful marriage in this country - something to
counteract the images we get bombarded with in popular culture. When we
are assaulted with images of celebrities of varying genres, be it
actors, sports figures, socialites, or even politicians who shrug
marriage on and off like the latest fashion, it is vitally important to
the face of our nation, for our children and our future, that we have a
balance of commitment and fidelity with which to stave off the
negativity. I search for these examples to show my own daughter, so
that she can see that marriage is more than a disposable whim, despite
overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
As a father, I'm sure you have faced these same concerns and
difficulties in raising your own daughters. Therefore I can also
imagine that you must understand how thrilled I have been over the past
few weeks to come home and turn on the news with my family. To finally
have concrete examples of true commitment, honest love, and steadfast
fidelity was such a relief and a joy.
Instead of speaking in the hypothetical, I was finally able to point to
these men and women, standing together for hours in the pouring rain,
and tell my child that this is what its all about. Forget Britney.
Forget Kobe. Forget Strom. Forget about all the people that we know
who have taken so frivolously the pure and simple beauty of love and
tarnished it so consistently. Look instead at the joy in the beautiful
faces of Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon - 51 years together! I mean,
honestly Mr. President - how many couples do you know who are together
for 51 years? I'm sure you agree that this love story provides a
wonderful opportunity to teach our children about the true meaning and
value of marriage. On the steps of San Francisco City Hall, rose
petals and champagne, suits and veils, horns honking and elation in the
streets; a celebration of love the likes of which this society has
never seen.
This morning, however, my joy turned to sadness, my relief transformed
into outrage, and my peace became anger. This morning, I watched you
stand before this nation and belittle these women, the thousands who
stood with them, and the countless millions who wish to follow them.
How could you do that, Mr. President? How could you take something so
beautiful - a clear and defining example of the true nature of
commitment - and declare it to be anything less? What is it that
validates your marriage which somehow doesn't apply to Del Martin and
Phyllis Lyon? By what power, what authority are you so divinely imbued
that you can stand before me and this nation and hold their love to a
higher standard?
Don't speak to me about homosexuality, Mr. President. Don't tell me
that the difference lies in the bedroom. I would never presume to ask
you or your wife how it is you choose to physically express your love
for one another, and I defy you to stand before Del Martin and Phyllis
Lyon and ask them to do the same. It is none of my business, as it is
none of yours, and it has nothing to do with the "sanctity of
marriage". I'm sure you would agree that marriage is far more than
sexual expression, and its high time we all started focusing on all the
other aspects of a relationship which hold it together over the course
of a lifetime. Therefore, with the mechanics of sex set aside, I ask
you again - what makes a marriage? I firmly believe that whatever
definition you derive, there are thousands upon thousands of shining
examples for you to embrace.
You want to protect marriage. I admire and support that, Mr.
President. Together, as a nation, let us find and celebrate examples
of what a marriage should be. Together, let us take couples who embody
the principles of commitment, fidelity, sacrifice and love, and hold
them up before our children as role models for their own futures.
Together, let us reinforce the concept that love is about far more than
sex, despite what popular culture would like them to believe.
Please, for the sake of our children, for the sake of our society, for
the sake of our future, do not take us down this road. Under the guise
of protection, do not support divisiveness. Under the guise of unity,
do not endorse discrimination. Under the guise of sanctity, do not
devalue commitment. Under the guise of democracy, do not encourage
this amendment.
Bette Midler
Enjoy.
Dear President Bush,
Today you called upon Congress to move quickly to amend the US
Constitution, and set in Federal stone a legal definition of marriage.
I would like to know why.
In your speech, you stated that this Amendment would serve to protect
marriage in America, which I must confess confuses me. Like you, I
believe in the importance of marriage and I feel that we as a society
take the institution far too lightly. In my circle of family, friends
and acquaintances, the vast majority have married and divorced - some
more than once. Still, I believe in marriage. I believe that there is
something fundamental about finding another person on this planet with
whom you want to build a life and family, and make a positive
contribution to society. I believe that we need more positive role
models for successful marriage in this country - something to
counteract the images we get bombarded with in popular culture. When we
are assaulted with images of celebrities of varying genres, be it
actors, sports figures, socialites, or even politicians who shrug
marriage on and off like the latest fashion, it is vitally important to
the face of our nation, for our children and our future, that we have a
balance of commitment and fidelity with which to stave off the
negativity. I search for these examples to show my own daughter, so
that she can see that marriage is more than a disposable whim, despite
overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
As a father, I'm sure you have faced these same concerns and
difficulties in raising your own daughters. Therefore I can also
imagine that you must understand how thrilled I have been over the past
few weeks to come home and turn on the news with my family. To finally
have concrete examples of true commitment, honest love, and steadfast
fidelity was such a relief and a joy.
Instead of speaking in the hypothetical, I was finally able to point to
these men and women, standing together for hours in the pouring rain,
and tell my child that this is what its all about. Forget Britney.
Forget Kobe. Forget Strom. Forget about all the people that we know
who have taken so frivolously the pure and simple beauty of love and
tarnished it so consistently. Look instead at the joy in the beautiful
faces of Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon - 51 years together! I mean,
honestly Mr. President - how many couples do you know who are together
for 51 years? I'm sure you agree that this love story provides a
wonderful opportunity to teach our children about the true meaning and
value of marriage. On the steps of San Francisco City Hall, rose
petals and champagne, suits and veils, horns honking and elation in the
streets; a celebration of love the likes of which this society has
never seen.
This morning, however, my joy turned to sadness, my relief transformed
into outrage, and my peace became anger. This morning, I watched you
stand before this nation and belittle these women, the thousands who
stood with them, and the countless millions who wish to follow them.
How could you do that, Mr. President? How could you take something so
beautiful - a clear and defining example of the true nature of
commitment - and declare it to be anything less? What is it that
validates your marriage which somehow doesn't apply to Del Martin and
Phyllis Lyon? By what power, what authority are you so divinely imbued
that you can stand before me and this nation and hold their love to a
higher standard?
Don't speak to me about homosexuality, Mr. President. Don't tell me
that the difference lies in the bedroom. I would never presume to ask
you or your wife how it is you choose to physically express your love
for one another, and I defy you to stand before Del Martin and Phyllis
Lyon and ask them to do the same. It is none of my business, as it is
none of yours, and it has nothing to do with the "sanctity of
marriage". I'm sure you would agree that marriage is far more than
sexual expression, and its high time we all started focusing on all the
other aspects of a relationship which hold it together over the course
of a lifetime. Therefore, with the mechanics of sex set aside, I ask
you again - what makes a marriage? I firmly believe that whatever
definition you derive, there are thousands upon thousands of shining
examples for you to embrace.
You want to protect marriage. I admire and support that, Mr.
President. Together, as a nation, let us find and celebrate examples
of what a marriage should be. Together, let us take couples who embody
the principles of commitment, fidelity, sacrifice and love, and hold
them up before our children as role models for their own futures.
Together, let us reinforce the concept that love is about far more than
sex, despite what popular culture would like them to believe.
Please, for the sake of our children, for the sake of our society, for
the sake of our future, do not take us down this road. Under the guise
of protection, do not support divisiveness. Under the guise of unity,
do not endorse discrimination. Under the guise of sanctity, do not
devalue commitment. Under the guise of democracy, do not encourage
this amendment.
Bette Midler