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[voice] i_speak_softly July 21 2011, 18:42:17 UTC
[An idea occurs.]

Hey, Smoker. How would you feel about arresting a pirate by the name of Jack Sparrow, repossessing his ship, and giving it to me?

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[voice] justicereigns July 21 2011, 18:48:44 UTC
Thrilled.

Although you realize once he gets back or free, or Blackbeard breaks him free, he's not going to let that slide.

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[voice] i_speak_softly July 21 2011, 18:51:45 UTC
I really just want to borrow it. I'd return it in better condition, I promise.

[If "plus one diving bell" counts as "better condition".]

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[voice] justicereigns July 21 2011, 20:30:02 UTC
[Now he's trying to work out the moral dilemmas of stealing from pirates. Does it still count as stealing? Do they even count as pirates here? He'd say Sparrow still deserves it, but the pirate usually does get punished. Still. Smoker hates pirates and pissing them off just seems like it should be done.]

All right. I'll see what I can do.

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[voice] i_speak_softly July 21 2011, 20:48:38 UTC
You're the best, Smoker.

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[voice] justicereigns July 21 2011, 20:58:04 UTC
[Bright fucking red.]

Stop that.

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[voice] i_speak_softly July 21 2011, 23:37:09 UTC
[Hm. Usually phrases like that encourage people to do more nice things for him.]

I mean - thanks.

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[voice] justicereigns July 22 2011, 05:50:25 UTC
It's fine... no trouble really. Dealing with pirates is what I do.

[This is the man who blushed over being told he wasn't hated. He cannot handle people actually approving of his views and actions for justice.]

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