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halfshellvenus August 26 2014, 06:40:15 UTC
I truly love the characterization of fairytales here, and the ways in which ALL the characters are boring. Except the peasant girls. And I guess Helena never noticed that they won the only prize available in their time.

The four elements as invisible cities was a neat touch, too. Though I'd be interested to see anyone try to locate Atlantis to visit it. :D

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i_17bingo August 27 2014, 07:49:09 UTC
Well, if you know where to look...

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beeker121 August 26 2014, 17:10:57 UTC
I really like the mythology you're creating, and how it does (and doesn't) tie into the real world. Also, I want to visit Atlantis.

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i_17bingo August 27 2014, 07:49:25 UTC
How long can you hold your breath?

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roina_arwen August 26 2014, 20:07:02 UTC
I love the idea of the invisible cities and the places you tied them too! Also, I adore the adultness of the conversation between mom and daughter. I think the only thing I'm confused about is there are 5 merchants but only 4 cities?

In some traditions, the elements are represented as Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Spirit - so shouldn't there be an element/city for Spirit as well? It would tie in better to having 5 merchants...

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i_17bingo August 27 2014, 07:42:01 UTC
The specifics of the metaphor are hard to cram into a kids story and keep it light, so I will be expanding on it in the future... somehow.

Cliff Note's version: The theme is exploration; therefore the elements reflect the four points of the compass you'd use to navigate the world or cast a sacred circle, and the five merchants represent the five nations that initially settled the Americas (the Spanish, the Portuguese, the English, the French, and the Dutch).

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deidrewilliams August 26 2014, 23:23:54 UTC
This is pretty cool. I like the idea of travelling to the invisible cities.

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i_17bingo August 27 2014, 07:50:00 UTC
I've been to two of them so far (and I may be seeing a third next year), so it's pretty cool.

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uncawes August 26 2014, 23:47:29 UTC
Marvelous story telling again. My only question is where did the 5th merchant come from? Five merchants, four cities.

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i_17bingo August 27 2014, 07:42:35 UTC
The merchants found the cities; they came from Europe.

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