I Can Only Take So Much: OR: Sitting in an Angry Chair
If all my hope is bleeding out of me, so too is my patience, my ability to abide the things that piss me off, bring me down. Don't care? FUCK YOU. Click here to see
Heather's truck got stolen. Let's just start with that...people taking what doesn't belong to them, like SOMEONE'S VEHICLE. None of my shit even compares, but I'll just keep typing because...well, because I can. Because I need to get it out.
Today someone I don't even know brought back years of hostility with a simple offhand comment that I can't even remember. It turns out that the guy auditing our store was a Marine. I asked him what he did for the Corps (as I do most Marines I run across these days). He replied 0311, infantry. He asked me the same question, and I replied 5544, horn player. He said, "Oh" in a way that was clearly insulting, then said some other offhand comment that I must have been too pissed to take in. I spent a good deal of both enlistments listening to the ignorant comments of knuckleheads just like this guy...Comments like "Oh, you're a band fag. Did you go to bootcamp?" We ALL go through the same basic training. EVERY Marine is a rifleman. My first platoon, in fact, was a heavy weapons platoon. Band platoons perform a band mission IN ADDITION TO a combat mission. So if seems like I'm angry, I AM, because basically while I served, I did my job as well as his. He (and others like him) will never understand or accept this.
If you're not a Marine, you probably don't understand. I am fiercely proud of my service, and I love the Marine Corps, and to have someone INSULT me, someone who doesn't have the first clue as to what I did...suffice it to say I wanted to crack the guy over the head with my bat.
AND the fucker was sitting at MY DESK.
THEN a bonehead coworker says she hated Sin City because she didn't understand it. Actually, she said "It was stupid." I didn't know whether to punch her or just feel sorry for her. Why is it that idiots always dismiss something as "stupid" if they don't understand? I would have taken "confusing" over "stupid", but nooooooo...
AND MY LIFE IS SUCKING. SUCKING. All this anger will either turn inward or explode outward, so I need to find a better outlet than drinking, and a more effective outlet than writing. What's weird is that the circumstances of my life aren't necessarily worse than they were a week ago, a month ago, a year ago...maybe it's just getting harder to deal with the same bullshit.
Or maybe I'm just having a bad week.
One shining, saving grace: I'M GOING TO SEE NINE INCH NAILS LIVE ON THURSDAY.
Heather's truck got stolen. Let's just start with that...people taking what doesn't belong to them, like SOMEONE'S VEHICLE. None of my shit even compares, but I'll just keep typing because...well, because I can. Because I need to get it out.
Today someone I don't even know brought back years of hostility with a simple offhand comment that I can't even remember. It turns out that the guy auditing our store was a Marine. I asked him what he did for the Corps (as I do most Marines I run across these days). He replied 0311, infantry. He asked me the same question, and I replied 5544, horn player. He said, "Oh" in a way that was clearly insulting, then said some other offhand comment that I must have been too pissed to take in. I spent a good deal of both enlistments listening to the ignorant comments of knuckleheads just like this guy...Comments like "Oh, you're a band fag. Did you go to bootcamp?" We ALL go through the same basic training. EVERY Marine is a rifleman. My first platoon, in fact, was a heavy weapons platoon. Band platoons perform a band mission IN ADDITION TO a combat mission. So if seems like I'm angry, I AM, because basically while I served, I did my job as well as his. He (and others like him) will never understand or accept this.
If you're not a Marine, you probably don't understand. I am fiercely proud of my service, and I love the Marine Corps, and to have someone INSULT me, someone who doesn't have the first clue as to what I did...suffice it to say I wanted to crack the guy over the head with my bat.
AND the fucker was sitting at MY DESK.
THEN a bonehead coworker says she hated Sin City because she didn't understand it. Actually, she said "It was stupid." I didn't know whether to punch her or just feel sorry for her. Why is it that idiots always dismiss something as "stupid" if they don't understand? I would have taken "confusing" over "stupid", but nooooooo...
AND MY LIFE IS SUCKING. SUCKING. All this anger will either turn inward or explode outward, so I need to find a better outlet than drinking, and a more effective outlet than writing. What's weird is that the circumstances of my life aren't necessarily worse than they were a week ago, a month ago, a year ago...maybe it's just getting harder to deal with the same bullshit.
Or maybe I'm just having a bad week.
One shining, saving grace: I'M GOING TO SEE NINE INCH NAILS LIVE ON THURSDAY.