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Aug 26, 2009 00:17

So I'm having some trouble deciding what to do on this issue ( Read more... )

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suegypt August 26 2009, 11:15:09 UTC
You aren't being unreasonable. If you haven't seen his place in four months, after asking (nicely, I assume), that sounds strange to me. The phone thing sounds strange as well.

Secretive is not a good way to begin a relationship, but there can be excuses, everybody's been hurt or messed up before, etc. Secretive is an awful way to continue a relationship, and you should talk to him about it.

If he won't see that he's being creepy about things and won't let you come over, think about what that means to you. Don't let the situation go, do something about it. Chick flicks aside, if someone is using you to build a new infrastructure for his life, it may mean he doesn't know how to do it himself, and that is a problem, Fifi, that you do not need to take on yourself for anyone other than your own kids.

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i_love_dinos August 26 2009, 15:47:15 UTC
the phone things weirds me out too. like, the guy who i'm sort f with, told me aftr our third date "listen, i'm still sort of married, but that's only because the paper work hasn't gone through yet" but he was still super worried about what i would think, but also super truthful. that's what guys should do.

i don't know, the practicly paying for your house but not letting you visit his sounds too much like a "kept woman" for my liking

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suegypt August 26 2009, 23:49:32 UTC
I'm a lot older than you guys, which may give me wisdom, maybe NOT. But, Fifi, anything that makes you question where this guy is coming from, you should be able to ask him about. If he dodges, if he qualifies, if he smoozes you, ask your questions until you get the real answer. I think you will know what the truth is, if you think you are worth knowing it. And you definitely are. Find out for your own safety and, um happiness...

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tgies August 27 2009, 03:50:59 UTC
this is what I said; spendin a lot of money + not really being particularly Available otherwise automatically sets off alarm bells in my head. guys with weird ideas about women who think they can buy everything they need

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