Log: 2 January 2008 - Misplaced Soul
WHO: Lorne happybeinggreen, Connor ialwayshadasoul, Angel ihaveasoul, Spike ihaveasoultoo
WHAT: Bringing Connor Home, and Fighting His Demon Inside... trying to figure out why he lost it in the first place.
WHEN: This Morning, EARLY hours.
WHERE: Random Forest in Scotlandish, Caritas
WHY: Connor lost it, Lorne wasn't going to lose him, and there was PLOT TO BE HAD!!!!
Lorne sighed as he walked through the snow of the remote..somewhere Connor had hidden himself. He'd decided that, five minutes into walking into it, snow was something he didn't like. But still, things needed to be sorted, so he'd deal with the cold, horrible white stuff for now. He grimaced a little at apatch of blood trailing to a lump of what he didn't want to look at, passing it as he carried on. Well, at least Connor wasn't hard to find.
In the far distance, but close enough for someone with Lorne's senses to catch, there was a quiet scream.
Lorne turned his head to the small sound, before heading towards him. A small part of him knew he should have come armed, but the rest of him pointed out that one didn't weild weapons against family. Not on earth, anyway.
The cry was swiftly silenced, yet... as Lorne continued on, another sound was heard bare minutes later... Soft weeping.
Lorne winced inwardly as the scream was cut off, then followed the weeping, moving surprisingly silently.
Distant, visible through the leafeless trees, Connor was bent over the body of a young girl, no more than thirteen, weeping, apologising over and over again.
Lorne watched the scene with a sad frown for a moment, before sighing, walking slowly towards him. "Connor?", he asked quietly
At the sound, Connor's head shot up, and the sorry was immediately erased by something evil and feral. He dropped the girls body as though it were nothing to him, licking a bit of stray blood from his lips as he growled, sighting prey.
Lorne, to his credit, didn't so much as flinch. He merly stood still and watched Connor quietly. "Well, finally found you anyway, Kiddo"
He chuckled low, "He did warn you..." he said before making a slow 'easy going' approach. "Your heart's harder to hear... must be its location."
"Probably", Lorne shrugged, non-plussed, "This is a new thing for you, huh, Boogalah. Like father like son and all that?"
"I wonder what your breed tastes like," he said, tilting his head, smiling that evil, mad, fanged smile again.
"Couldn't say, not eating meat and all", said Lorne with a shrug, "You'd have to ask my dad".
"Would need a portal for that," he sneered. Once close enough his hand shot out to his throat, but he didn't squeeze. "You'll live decapitated... give me plenty of time to find your veins."
Lorne didn't move either offensively or defensively, just stood still and blinked at him.
"Yeah, we're kinda like cockroaches like that", he said, "I'm just going to wait for you to get this out of your system, then"
He scowled, sniffing and looking him over, "I can't find your pulse," he complained, hand dropping from Lorne's throat as he slowly walked around him. "Where the fuck do you keep your pulse?" he demanded.
Lorne arched a brow, turning his head to watch him walk. "That would be telling"
"Hm..." it was a non committal sound, born of frustration. "I could tear you apart and find it, it'll hurt more that way," he chuckled.
"You can try if you think it'll help", the demon shrugged, "Won't be the first time it's happened to me"
"I suppose not... but it'll devestate him," he chuckled.
"Probably", Lorne replied, "But I'll heal"
"Depends on how many pieces I put you in," he chuckled darkly.
"True", said Lorne with a nod, "Has to be doen just right, mind"
"Small enough pieces, won't matter anymore... why dont' you fight?" the demon asked, grasping Lorne's arm. "Wouldn't want to get to the heart of the matter immediately, that's no fun."
Lorne arched a brow at his captured arm, before looking at him. "I don't fight against my family"
"Pity," Connor said, pulling his arm right off and leaning in to drink the blood that fell from the wound before it reached the snow, even as that from his taken arm dripped heedlessly to stain it.
Lorne yelped in pain as his arm was torn off, even as the wound began to cauterise itself. "Won't get much of a meal from me, Kiddo", he said through gritted teeth, waiting for the pain to eb a little.
"Long's your heart beats where I can hear it, as long as I can smell your blood, he can't stop me doing whatever I want to get to it," he chuckled.
"If that's what you think, Kid", said Lorne simply, arching a brow.
"KNow why?" he asked, grasping Lorne's remaining wrist.
"Why what?", asked Lorne, his arm tensing, but still not fighting back.
"He can't stop me, because he's too weak," he whispered, this time bringing Lorne's arm up and twisting off his hand, sucking from the vein he found in the break.
"That's what you thiAGH!", Lorne cried out, before taking in a wracked breath, "He's stronger than either of you realise"
"Really?" the vampire asked once the wound had closed itself, "Then why am I having so much fun tearing you apart?"
"Because he hasn't realised yet", replied Lorne with a knowing smile, "I'm giving him time"
"Realised what?" he narrowed his yellow eyes.
"You'll see", Lorne smirked.
"Hm," he shrugged. "Wonder if those horns let more blood?" he asked, reaching up.
"Not really", replied Lorne tilting his head out of the way.
"I know they're sensitive, though," he chuckled, grasping one.
Lorne gave a soft hiss, red eye locked on him. "Not going to bother arguing what you already know"
"Gonna be kinda like tearing off your dick, if you've even got-" the manic expression blanked.
"Took you long enough", said Lorne conversationally.
It was another five minutes before Connor even moved, let alone blinked. Slowly, as though taking great effort, his hand released the horn and fell to his side.
"Thanks for that,. I was getting kinda uncomfortable", said Lorne, watching him calmly, "Don't let him think he can beat you, Boogalah"
Connor frowned, pressing Lorne's wrist back together with both hands, still saying nothing, trembling.
Lorne winced as his hand began to reattach itself, muscle and bone starting to knit together again.
The boy shook his head, to himself, then bent down to retrieve Lorne's arm, pressing it in as well.
"Thanks, Connor", said Lorne, watching him quietly as hi arm mended itself, flexing it experimentally once it had done, the movement being a little stiff and unco-ordinated at first.
Once Lorne was in one piece, Connor stumbled back away from him, shoving his hands deep in his pockets, keeping his eyes on the crimson snow.
"You ready to come home now?", the demon asked him quietly, watching him.
He shook his head quickly, dirty hair swinging in the now falling snow.
"Okay, that wasn't a request", said Lorne pointedly.
He shook his head again. "Can't." he said tightly.
"Again, Honey, it's not up for discussion", said Lorne, "You're coming home"
"No." He shook his head again, still not looking up. "Won't last...."
"So, what, you'll go back to eating people and I have to do this song and dance all over again?", asked Lorne, "You're going to the one place where you can get help"
"You can't help me! The best help you can get is bring a Slayer along," Connor said. "I'm barely hanging on as it is!"
"Yeah, that's not gonna happen", said Lorne simply, "You're coming home"
"What, so I can eat my family? Not everyone's as hardy as you are, Lorne!"
"No, so your family can help you deal with it", said Lorne, "I don't think you'll find anyone who can tell you more about having a demon inside them than us"
"Except you're a misfit good demon, Dad's got the soul of a fucking saint, and Spike's got the soul of a poet, that's plenty stronger than a scientist warrior can ever be. It'd be like... like being a librarian or something! And no, Giles can't be an example, he's a Watcher, and they're different," Connor said.
"Yeah, and you have a stronger soul than you think, or you wouldn't have stopped", pointed out Lorne, "And souls are overrated anyway. I don't have one, I'm all demon"
"You've got one, it just isn't a human one," Connor said. "Depends on how you look at it. And I stopped... I don't know how I stopped, but I don't know if I can again. I've been trying to stop for DAYS, and..." he motioned to the dead girl in the snow.
"But you DID stop", said Lorne, arching one brow, "Lemmie put it this way, you're not staying out here to be caught in a cycle, it needs to be broken"
Connor reached up and pulled off a branch, snapping it and handing a bit to Lorne. "Then break it."
Lorne didn't take it. "Breaking the cycle, not you", he said, "I'm not taking another life again"
Connor dropped the makeshift stake to the ground. "I'm a mass murderer, Lorne - I'd get injected for this, or a chair."
"So's your dad, and Spike", said Lorne pointedly, "It's wrong, yeah. but you are allowed to try and redeem yourself"
"They did it soulless, Lorne... it's different."
"And you having a demon in control of you isn't?", he asked.
Connor just looked at him. "What part of I did this with a soul isn't getting across to you?"
"You can do bad things with a soul, too", said Lorne quietly, "At least you didn't do it on purpose." He sighed, testing his arm for a second, before swiftly grabbing Connor's arm, a ring on his hand. "Sorry, Kiddo", he said, before adding, as the vanished, "Dinew"
"What've you done!" Connor shouted when they reappeared. Scents attacked his nostrils, life, blood... heartbeats coming from everywhere....
"Took you home", said Lorne simply, "I really suggest you hang on there, you know you can"
Connor looked around wildly, starting to hyperventilate. They were alone at the moment, but beyond the walls... outside... was humanity... food....
Lorne watched him quietly. "Just block it out, Kiddo", he said simply, "You're a stubborn little so-and-so, I'm sure you can fight one teensy tiny demon"
"It's too strong...." his breath came faster.
"Like hell it is", said Lorne, "You've beaten demons much stronger than this one"
"They weren't inside me... ohhh," he whined, "they smell so good," he half turned toward the door.
Lorne stepped to put himself between Connor and the door. "So, it's a different kind of demon, you can still fight it"
"So hungry... like this.. empty pit inside...."
"Then drink some of the blood in the fridge", said Lorne.
"Tastes dead."
"That's what the microwave is for", replied Lorne logically.
Connor wandered toward the door, longingly. "M... food..."
"No. Food in the the baggies", said Lorne, getting himself in the way again and looking at Connor pointedly, "C'mon, Kiddo. You can fight this, lord knows you fight everything else"
"So many to choose from...."
"You know you won't get a meal in Caritas unless it comes in a glass", said Lorne, moving to fold his arms, then wicning, thinking better of it, "Just take a deep breath and get yourself centred"
Connor whimpered a bit, like a kickedpuppy
Lorne remained standing in the way, arching one eyebrow.
Connor licked a fang.
"Yeah, seriously, not scary", said Lorne calmly.
"There was still a little left," Connor said, grinning.
"A little what?", asked Lorne.
"Blood." Connor looked over Lorne's shoulder at the door. "C'mon, please... nobody'll miss just one...."
"No, Connor", said Lorne, "You can have as much as the bagged supply as you like, but no more live food. Consider it a diet"
"But live food tastes so much better!"
"I don't care", replied Lorne, "YOu're not having it"
"Connor?", Angel stepped from his room, frowning, "I thought I heard you...£
His son's yellow eyes flashed as he darted around Lorne toward the door, sooo hungry.
Spike walked in scratching his jaw as he followed Angel before blinking at the runaway boy.
Lorne sighed, catching him with one arm, wincing slightly at the action. "Whoah, Kiddo, no more of the running"
Spike pulled a face staring at Lorne, "What the bloody hell happend?" He replied walking towards them.
"Connor here got a bit too in tune with his vampire nature and I brought him back", replied Lorne, "And if one of you could grab him, I'd really appreciate it, my arms aren't working properly"
Connor snarled, kicking out at Lorne to get away.
Spike sighed grabbing Connor twisting his arm behind his back. "C'mon fang calm down."
"So hungry....."Connor struggled against the older, and stronger, vampire. "Don't you miss it? Hot, pouring down your throat while they struggle, gurgling...."
"Thanks, Sparkles", said Lorne, rubbing his arm.
"Connor", Angel frowned, moving closer, watching him concerned, "What's gotten into you?"
"Yeah sure lad , but surprisningly weetabix does wonders." He replied holding him as his husband came closer.
Connor snarled, still struggling. "Nothing's gotten into me, I'm just Dandy Dad."
"You don't look it", said Angel, arching a brow at him, "You smell like you've been feeding. A lot"
"Mmmmyeah... sooooo good."
Spike raised a brow and looked at Angel, "Just sounds wrong coming from your son." The blond pointed out.
"I know", Angel frowned softly, worry in his features, "What happened to you, Connor?"
Connor licked his lips, then gave a cocky smile, stopping struggling for the moment. "Woke up."
"Woke up?", asked Angel confused.
"Think of it as you but without the soul-losing thing", offered Lorne from the doorway.
"No this hunger thing it's more like a newbie vamp or one thats not fed in a while." Spike mused. "They usually come out of it though...they don't last long otherwise.
"So hungry," Connor agreed, struggling again.
"You guys would be the experts", Lorne shrugged, "Ow. 'kay, not doing that again. So, I figured you two could, I don't know, snap him out of it? Before he goes on a killing spree again?"
Angel frowned, watching his son carefully. "Wouldn't be the first time we'd done something like this..I never thoguth Connor would need it, though"
Connor yelled, kicking back at Spike's leg, trying to get free. He could HEAR them, with their heartbeats and their sweet hot blood, just outside the walls. A whole CITY full of them. "There's plenty of 'em... nobody'll miss a few!"
Spike frowned,slamming COnnor against the wall, "Enough of that." He ordered.
Angel frowned worriedly. "Come on, Connor, you have to fight it or it'll consume you"
The boy cried out, momentarily stunned, then struggled again, "So empty, so hungry, please!!!"
SPike sighed, "Better get him something, he's not gonna think straight."
"On it", replied Lorne, waking off into the kitchen, coming back moments later with a warmed cup of blood.
Connor lifted his head, sniffing the air, smelling the blood. "Is that... ABneg?" Connor asked, licking his lips hungrily.
"Blood not being my normal diet, I wouldn't know", said Lorne, handing the mug to Angel, who walked over to his son.
The boy strained against Spike's hold.
Spike looked at Angel, "Get a bloody move on."
"Calm down, getting stressed out won't help anyone", said Angel calmly, before putting the mug to Connor's lips, "Here, drink up"
The boy leaned forward, drinking greedily.
Spike sighed, "Great so now we're gonna need to bring it in for three people."
"There's always plenty downstairs", said Lorne leaning against the doorway, casually in an attempt to hide the fact he needed to do so, watching Angel tip the mug, feeding his son.
When he finished, Connor actually tried to lick the traces from inside the mug, making small hungry noises...
Angel sighed, pulling it away. "Just that, for now, you have to learn to deal with the hunger"
Spike sighed letting him go temporarily.
Connor shrugged away. "Need more... There's... soo empty," he closed his eyes as though pained. "Took soooo long."
Spike sighed, "Oh just give him another one, he can cope with it when his heads a bit clearer."
Angel sighed handing the mug to Lorne, knowing there was no way he'd ever figure out that microwave. Lorne rolled his eyes, before shuffling off back into the kitchen, bringing back another mug for Angel to give to Connor.
Connor took it with both hands, drinking greedily once more, not letting a single drop go to waste.
Spike sighed watching him, "Damnit he's making me hungry now." He grumbled.
Lorne made a 'blech' sound. "I wish I knew what trigger....", Angel fell quiet, "Oh...damn"
Spike blinked at him, "What triggered what now?"
"When I was....him", Angel frowned, "He was bringing in people for Angelus to feed off. It must have done...something"
"OH well... not much we can do abotu it now cept manage it."
"I suppose", said Angel, his frown deepening as he watched his son.
Connor ignored them, getting the last drops up with his fingertips, licking them clean of the blood.
Or perhaps he wasn't ignoring them after all, "Been months... so long..."
Angel took the mug away, watching Connor in concern. "Better?"
Spike sighed, "Well so long as you keep drinking you'll be fine."
"Little... hole's smaller...."
Spike pulled a face, "Don't think I want to know."
"I think he means his hunger, Spike", pointed out Angel, then to his son, "You should sleep"
Connor frowned, slowly shifting back to a human face. "What if I forget...."
"Forget that you're hungry? It's a bit of a big thing to forget."
"It'll take a while to get used to", said Angel carefully.
"July..." Connor said, before getting the last bit of blood.
"July?", asked Angel.
"Haven't... maybe a glass or two.. since July - Then I was... and they tasted so good....."
"Oh", Angel frowned, looking over at Spike, then back at Connor.
Spike sighed, "WEll regular drinks mate thats what you need," he replied sighing, "Ok now that excitement is over with, Kermit you ok over there?"
"Mmm?", asked Lorne from where he was leaning on the doorway, "Oh yeah. I'll be fine, give me a few hours and a lie down and I'll be as good as new"
Right well you lie down then, I@m gettting a drink."
Connor glanced guiltily at Lorne. "Sorry."
"Nothing to forgive, Kiddo, you weren't in your right mind", said Lorne with a soft smile, shifting (with some barely concealed effort) from his leaning spot and heading over to his room.
Connor made a small sound and nodded, frowning at the floor.
Angel blinked, watching the demon go, noting his gait wasn't quite right, before looking at Connor. "What did you do to him?", he asked once Lorne's door had closed.
"Tore an arm and a wrist off to get at his blood," Connor answered quietly.
Spike returned with a mug of heatedblood mixed with weetabix, "Why not just go straight for the throat?"
"Couldn't find his blood, I.. it.. wanted to play with him first."
Angel shot Spike a look. "Spike, it's Lorne!", he said, angry, before looking at Connor, ".....oh"
Spike shrugged, "Simple question." He replied padding over to check on the demon.
Connor shifted his stance.
Lorne had got to his room and shirked off his suit jacket, checking out the nasty looking scar line that ran around one of his arms, he glanced up as Spike entred, rolling his eyes. "I'm fine, Sparkles, really"
Angel sighed, watching Connor. "Well, we'll just have to work on controling it"
"You sure? That gonna heal?" He asked
"I still think you should stake me," Connor said.
"I've had a lot worse than this", said Lorne, grabbing his arm with his free hand and giving it a sharp pull, a few splintered bones popping back into place, "Ow. Growing up in a hell dimension is good for teaching you to heal fast"
"That's not going to happen", said Angel pointedly, crossing his arms.
"I did it with a soul, and like as not will do it again... what happens when I see a human... I can't control it."
Spike nodded, "Alright, Well peaches is about if you want sommat."
"You'll just have to try harder", said Angel watching him, "There's no easy away out of this, Connor. You have to be strong"
"I think Angel's got enough on his plate", said Lorne, before smiling, "I can take care of myself. I'm a big demon"
"I'm not like you," he said, before looking up, "for the first time, I wish I was. But I'm not. I'm not that strong."
"Alright." He replied with a sip and a wave walking back to the other.
"You are that strong", said Angel, "You're as stubborn as your mother, and she was the most stubborn person in the existance of stubborn people"
Lorne watched him go and sighed, closing his door behind the vampire, going back to tending to his wounds.
"Must not have inherited it as well as you think."
"I disagree", said Angel simply.
"Wish I could believe you."
Angel folded his arms. "Get some sleep, Connor"
Spike frowned standing beside Angel watching Connor quietly.
Connor shoved his hands in his pockets (after setting the mug aside). "It'll get out again if I sleep...."
"You have to sleep", said Angel simply, "Or you won't be strong wnough to fight it"
Connor frowned, thinking. "I'll..try."
"Good", Angel nodded
Spike handed Angel the rest of his mug comfortingly.
Connor nodded, then turned to go.
Angel gave Spike a thankfull smile. "We'll keep you together, Son", he said to Connor, "I promise"
"If you can't, kill me... It's not worth it."
"Of course it's worth it, your my son", he said pointedly.
"Not just your son... I'm a monster, I'm His son, too..." Connor whispered as he slipped out.
Angel watched him go, concern crossing his face as he looked down at the floor.
Spike sighed wrapping his arm around his waist, "Come on love."
Angel sighed, leaning into him sadly. "What am I going to do with him?"
"WE'll figure summat out."
"It's my fault", he sighed, "Again"
"Oh don't you start getting into a sulk, youll not figure anything out that way>"
"Sorry", he said quietly, "Lorne ok?"
"Yeah, I think he'll be alright."
Angel nodded, glancing the way Connor had gone again. "I hope we can fix him....I can't.."
"I know, we will." He replied kissing his temple.
"Yeah", said Angel quietly, worriedly.
Spike rubbed his back, "Come on." He replied pulling him away
Angel cast one more worried look at the door, before nodding, following Spike silently away.
L
WHAT: Bringing Connor Home, and Fighting His Demon Inside... trying to figure out why he lost it in the first place.
WHEN: This Morning, EARLY hours.
WHERE: Random Forest in Scotlandish, Caritas
WHY: Connor lost it, Lorne wasn't going to lose him, and there was PLOT TO BE HAD!!!!
Lorne sighed as he walked through the snow of the remote..somewhere Connor had hidden himself. He'd decided that, five minutes into walking into it, snow was something he didn't like. But still, things needed to be sorted, so he'd deal with the cold, horrible white stuff for now. He grimaced a little at apatch of blood trailing to a lump of what he didn't want to look at, passing it as he carried on. Well, at least Connor wasn't hard to find.
In the far distance, but close enough for someone with Lorne's senses to catch, there was a quiet scream.
Lorne turned his head to the small sound, before heading towards him. A small part of him knew he should have come armed, but the rest of him pointed out that one didn't weild weapons against family. Not on earth, anyway.
The cry was swiftly silenced, yet... as Lorne continued on, another sound was heard bare minutes later... Soft weeping.
Lorne winced inwardly as the scream was cut off, then followed the weeping, moving surprisingly silently.
Distant, visible through the leafeless trees, Connor was bent over the body of a young girl, no more than thirteen, weeping, apologising over and over again.
Lorne watched the scene with a sad frown for a moment, before sighing, walking slowly towards him. "Connor?", he asked quietly
At the sound, Connor's head shot up, and the sorry was immediately erased by something evil and feral. He dropped the girls body as though it were nothing to him, licking a bit of stray blood from his lips as he growled, sighting prey.
Lorne, to his credit, didn't so much as flinch. He merly stood still and watched Connor quietly. "Well, finally found you anyway, Kiddo"
He chuckled low, "He did warn you..." he said before making a slow 'easy going' approach. "Your heart's harder to hear... must be its location."
"Probably", Lorne shrugged, non-plussed, "This is a new thing for you, huh, Boogalah. Like father like son and all that?"
"I wonder what your breed tastes like," he said, tilting his head, smiling that evil, mad, fanged smile again.
"Couldn't say, not eating meat and all", said Lorne with a shrug, "You'd have to ask my dad".
"Would need a portal for that," he sneered. Once close enough his hand shot out to his throat, but he didn't squeeze. "You'll live decapitated... give me plenty of time to find your veins."
Lorne didn't move either offensively or defensively, just stood still and blinked at him.
"Yeah, we're kinda like cockroaches like that", he said, "I'm just going to wait for you to get this out of your system, then"
He scowled, sniffing and looking him over, "I can't find your pulse," he complained, hand dropping from Lorne's throat as he slowly walked around him. "Where the fuck do you keep your pulse?" he demanded.
Lorne arched a brow, turning his head to watch him walk. "That would be telling"
"Hm..." it was a non committal sound, born of frustration. "I could tear you apart and find it, it'll hurt more that way," he chuckled.
"You can try if you think it'll help", the demon shrugged, "Won't be the first time it's happened to me"
"I suppose not... but it'll devestate him," he chuckled.
"Probably", Lorne replied, "But I'll heal"
"Depends on how many pieces I put you in," he chuckled darkly.
"True", said Lorne with a nod, "Has to be doen just right, mind"
"Small enough pieces, won't matter anymore... why dont' you fight?" the demon asked, grasping Lorne's arm. "Wouldn't want to get to the heart of the matter immediately, that's no fun."
Lorne arched a brow at his captured arm, before looking at him. "I don't fight against my family"
"Pity," Connor said, pulling his arm right off and leaning in to drink the blood that fell from the wound before it reached the snow, even as that from his taken arm dripped heedlessly to stain it.
Lorne yelped in pain as his arm was torn off, even as the wound began to cauterise itself. "Won't get much of a meal from me, Kiddo", he said through gritted teeth, waiting for the pain to eb a little.
"Long's your heart beats where I can hear it, as long as I can smell your blood, he can't stop me doing whatever I want to get to it," he chuckled.
"If that's what you think, Kid", said Lorne simply, arching a brow.
"KNow why?" he asked, grasping Lorne's remaining wrist.
"Why what?", asked Lorne, his arm tensing, but still not fighting back.
"He can't stop me, because he's too weak," he whispered, this time bringing Lorne's arm up and twisting off his hand, sucking from the vein he found in the break.
"That's what you thiAGH!", Lorne cried out, before taking in a wracked breath, "He's stronger than either of you realise"
"Really?" the vampire asked once the wound had closed itself, "Then why am I having so much fun tearing you apart?"
"Because he hasn't realised yet", replied Lorne with a knowing smile, "I'm giving him time"
"Realised what?" he narrowed his yellow eyes.
"You'll see", Lorne smirked.
"Hm," he shrugged. "Wonder if those horns let more blood?" he asked, reaching up.
"Not really", replied Lorne tilting his head out of the way.
"I know they're sensitive, though," he chuckled, grasping one.
Lorne gave a soft hiss, red eye locked on him. "Not going to bother arguing what you already know"
"Gonna be kinda like tearing off your dick, if you've even got-" the manic expression blanked.
"Took you long enough", said Lorne conversationally.
It was another five minutes before Connor even moved, let alone blinked. Slowly, as though taking great effort, his hand released the horn and fell to his side.
"Thanks for that,. I was getting kinda uncomfortable", said Lorne, watching him calmly, "Don't let him think he can beat you, Boogalah"
Connor frowned, pressing Lorne's wrist back together with both hands, still saying nothing, trembling.
Lorne winced as his hand began to reattach itself, muscle and bone starting to knit together again.
The boy shook his head, to himself, then bent down to retrieve Lorne's arm, pressing it in as well.
"Thanks, Connor", said Lorne, watching him quietly as hi arm mended itself, flexing it experimentally once it had done, the movement being a little stiff and unco-ordinated at first.
Once Lorne was in one piece, Connor stumbled back away from him, shoving his hands deep in his pockets, keeping his eyes on the crimson snow.
"You ready to come home now?", the demon asked him quietly, watching him.
He shook his head quickly, dirty hair swinging in the now falling snow.
"Okay, that wasn't a request", said Lorne pointedly.
He shook his head again. "Can't." he said tightly.
"Again, Honey, it's not up for discussion", said Lorne, "You're coming home"
"No." He shook his head again, still not looking up. "Won't last...."
"So, what, you'll go back to eating people and I have to do this song and dance all over again?", asked Lorne, "You're going to the one place where you can get help"
"You can't help me! The best help you can get is bring a Slayer along," Connor said. "I'm barely hanging on as it is!"
"Yeah, that's not gonna happen", said Lorne simply, "You're coming home"
"What, so I can eat my family? Not everyone's as hardy as you are, Lorne!"
"No, so your family can help you deal with it", said Lorne, "I don't think you'll find anyone who can tell you more about having a demon inside them than us"
"Except you're a misfit good demon, Dad's got the soul of a fucking saint, and Spike's got the soul of a poet, that's plenty stronger than a scientist warrior can ever be. It'd be like... like being a librarian or something! And no, Giles can't be an example, he's a Watcher, and they're different," Connor said.
"Yeah, and you have a stronger soul than you think, or you wouldn't have stopped", pointed out Lorne, "And souls are overrated anyway. I don't have one, I'm all demon"
"You've got one, it just isn't a human one," Connor said. "Depends on how you look at it. And I stopped... I don't know how I stopped, but I don't know if I can again. I've been trying to stop for DAYS, and..." he motioned to the dead girl in the snow.
"But you DID stop", said Lorne, arching one brow, "Lemmie put it this way, you're not staying out here to be caught in a cycle, it needs to be broken"
Connor reached up and pulled off a branch, snapping it and handing a bit to Lorne. "Then break it."
Lorne didn't take it. "Breaking the cycle, not you", he said, "I'm not taking another life again"
Connor dropped the makeshift stake to the ground. "I'm a mass murderer, Lorne - I'd get injected for this, or a chair."
"So's your dad, and Spike", said Lorne pointedly, "It's wrong, yeah. but you are allowed to try and redeem yourself"
"They did it soulless, Lorne... it's different."
"And you having a demon in control of you isn't?", he asked.
Connor just looked at him. "What part of I did this with a soul isn't getting across to you?"
"You can do bad things with a soul, too", said Lorne quietly, "At least you didn't do it on purpose." He sighed, testing his arm for a second, before swiftly grabbing Connor's arm, a ring on his hand. "Sorry, Kiddo", he said, before adding, as the vanished, "Dinew"
"What've you done!" Connor shouted when they reappeared. Scents attacked his nostrils, life, blood... heartbeats coming from everywhere....
"Took you home", said Lorne simply, "I really suggest you hang on there, you know you can"
Connor looked around wildly, starting to hyperventilate. They were alone at the moment, but beyond the walls... outside... was humanity... food....
Lorne watched him quietly. "Just block it out, Kiddo", he said simply, "You're a stubborn little so-and-so, I'm sure you can fight one teensy tiny demon"
"It's too strong...." his breath came faster.
"Like hell it is", said Lorne, "You've beaten demons much stronger than this one"
"They weren't inside me... ohhh," he whined, "they smell so good," he half turned toward the door.
Lorne stepped to put himself between Connor and the door. "So, it's a different kind of demon, you can still fight it"
"So hungry... like this.. empty pit inside...."
"Then drink some of the blood in the fridge", said Lorne.
"Tastes dead."
"That's what the microwave is for", replied Lorne logically.
Connor wandered toward the door, longingly. "M... food..."
"No. Food in the the baggies", said Lorne, getting himself in the way again and looking at Connor pointedly, "C'mon, Kiddo. You can fight this, lord knows you fight everything else"
"So many to choose from...."
"You know you won't get a meal in Caritas unless it comes in a glass", said Lorne, moving to fold his arms, then wicning, thinking better of it, "Just take a deep breath and get yourself centred"
Connor whimpered a bit, like a kickedpuppy
Lorne remained standing in the way, arching one eyebrow.
Connor licked a fang.
"Yeah, seriously, not scary", said Lorne calmly.
"There was still a little left," Connor said, grinning.
"A little what?", asked Lorne.
"Blood." Connor looked over Lorne's shoulder at the door. "C'mon, please... nobody'll miss just one...."
"No, Connor", said Lorne, "You can have as much as the bagged supply as you like, but no more live food. Consider it a diet"
"But live food tastes so much better!"
"I don't care", replied Lorne, "YOu're not having it"
"Connor?", Angel stepped from his room, frowning, "I thought I heard you...£
His son's yellow eyes flashed as he darted around Lorne toward the door, sooo hungry.
Spike walked in scratching his jaw as he followed Angel before blinking at the runaway boy.
Lorne sighed, catching him with one arm, wincing slightly at the action. "Whoah, Kiddo, no more of the running"
Spike pulled a face staring at Lorne, "What the bloody hell happend?" He replied walking towards them.
"Connor here got a bit too in tune with his vampire nature and I brought him back", replied Lorne, "And if one of you could grab him, I'd really appreciate it, my arms aren't working properly"
Connor snarled, kicking out at Lorne to get away.
Spike sighed grabbing Connor twisting his arm behind his back. "C'mon fang calm down."
"So hungry....."Connor struggled against the older, and stronger, vampire. "Don't you miss it? Hot, pouring down your throat while they struggle, gurgling...."
"Thanks, Sparkles", said Lorne, rubbing his arm.
"Connor", Angel frowned, moving closer, watching him concerned, "What's gotten into you?"
"Yeah sure lad , but surprisningly weetabix does wonders." He replied holding him as his husband came closer.
Connor snarled, still struggling. "Nothing's gotten into me, I'm just Dandy Dad."
"You don't look it", said Angel, arching a brow at him, "You smell like you've been feeding. A lot"
"Mmmmyeah... sooooo good."
Spike raised a brow and looked at Angel, "Just sounds wrong coming from your son." The blond pointed out.
"I know", Angel frowned softly, worry in his features, "What happened to you, Connor?"
Connor licked his lips, then gave a cocky smile, stopping struggling for the moment. "Woke up."
"Woke up?", asked Angel confused.
"Think of it as you but without the soul-losing thing", offered Lorne from the doorway.
"No this hunger thing it's more like a newbie vamp or one thats not fed in a while." Spike mused. "They usually come out of it though...they don't last long otherwise.
"So hungry," Connor agreed, struggling again.
"You guys would be the experts", Lorne shrugged, "Ow. 'kay, not doing that again. So, I figured you two could, I don't know, snap him out of it? Before he goes on a killing spree again?"
Angel frowned, watching his son carefully. "Wouldn't be the first time we'd done something like this..I never thoguth Connor would need it, though"
Connor yelled, kicking back at Spike's leg, trying to get free. He could HEAR them, with their heartbeats and their sweet hot blood, just outside the walls. A whole CITY full of them. "There's plenty of 'em... nobody'll miss a few!"
Spike frowned,slamming COnnor against the wall, "Enough of that." He ordered.
Angel frowned worriedly. "Come on, Connor, you have to fight it or it'll consume you"
The boy cried out, momentarily stunned, then struggled again, "So empty, so hungry, please!!!"
SPike sighed, "Better get him something, he's not gonna think straight."
"On it", replied Lorne, waking off into the kitchen, coming back moments later with a warmed cup of blood.
Connor lifted his head, sniffing the air, smelling the blood. "Is that... ABneg?" Connor asked, licking his lips hungrily.
"Blood not being my normal diet, I wouldn't know", said Lorne, handing the mug to Angel, who walked over to his son.
The boy strained against Spike's hold.
Spike looked at Angel, "Get a bloody move on."
"Calm down, getting stressed out won't help anyone", said Angel calmly, before putting the mug to Connor's lips, "Here, drink up"
The boy leaned forward, drinking greedily.
Spike sighed, "Great so now we're gonna need to bring it in for three people."
"There's always plenty downstairs", said Lorne leaning against the doorway, casually in an attempt to hide the fact he needed to do so, watching Angel tip the mug, feeding his son.
When he finished, Connor actually tried to lick the traces from inside the mug, making small hungry noises...
Angel sighed, pulling it away. "Just that, for now, you have to learn to deal with the hunger"
Spike sighed letting him go temporarily.
Connor shrugged away. "Need more... There's... soo empty," he closed his eyes as though pained. "Took soooo long."
Spike sighed, "Oh just give him another one, he can cope with it when his heads a bit clearer."
Angel sighed handing the mug to Lorne, knowing there was no way he'd ever figure out that microwave. Lorne rolled his eyes, before shuffling off back into the kitchen, bringing back another mug for Angel to give to Connor.
Connor took it with both hands, drinking greedily once more, not letting a single drop go to waste.
Spike sighed watching him, "Damnit he's making me hungry now." He grumbled.
Lorne made a 'blech' sound. "I wish I knew what trigger....", Angel fell quiet, "Oh...damn"
Spike blinked at him, "What triggered what now?"
"When I was....him", Angel frowned, "He was bringing in people for Angelus to feed off. It must have done...something"
"OH well... not much we can do abotu it now cept manage it."
"I suppose", said Angel, his frown deepening as he watched his son.
Connor ignored them, getting the last drops up with his fingertips, licking them clean of the blood.
Or perhaps he wasn't ignoring them after all, "Been months... so long..."
Angel took the mug away, watching Connor in concern. "Better?"
Spike sighed, "Well so long as you keep drinking you'll be fine."
"Little... hole's smaller...."
Spike pulled a face, "Don't think I want to know."
"I think he means his hunger, Spike", pointed out Angel, then to his son, "You should sleep"
Connor frowned, slowly shifting back to a human face. "What if I forget...."
"Forget that you're hungry? It's a bit of a big thing to forget."
"It'll take a while to get used to", said Angel carefully.
"July..." Connor said, before getting the last bit of blood.
"July?", asked Angel.
"Haven't... maybe a glass or two.. since July - Then I was... and they tasted so good....."
"Oh", Angel frowned, looking over at Spike, then back at Connor.
Spike sighed, "WEll regular drinks mate thats what you need," he replied sighing, "Ok now that excitement is over with, Kermit you ok over there?"
"Mmm?", asked Lorne from where he was leaning on the doorway, "Oh yeah. I'll be fine, give me a few hours and a lie down and I'll be as good as new"
Right well you lie down then, I@m gettting a drink."
Connor glanced guiltily at Lorne. "Sorry."
"Nothing to forgive, Kiddo, you weren't in your right mind", said Lorne with a soft smile, shifting (with some barely concealed effort) from his leaning spot and heading over to his room.
Connor made a small sound and nodded, frowning at the floor.
Angel blinked, watching the demon go, noting his gait wasn't quite right, before looking at Connor. "What did you do to him?", he asked once Lorne's door had closed.
"Tore an arm and a wrist off to get at his blood," Connor answered quietly.
Spike returned with a mug of heatedblood mixed with weetabix, "Why not just go straight for the throat?"
"Couldn't find his blood, I.. it.. wanted to play with him first."
Angel shot Spike a look. "Spike, it's Lorne!", he said, angry, before looking at Connor, ".....oh"
Spike shrugged, "Simple question." He replied padding over to check on the demon.
Connor shifted his stance.
Lorne had got to his room and shirked off his suit jacket, checking out the nasty looking scar line that ran around one of his arms, he glanced up as Spike entred, rolling his eyes. "I'm fine, Sparkles, really"
Angel sighed, watching Connor. "Well, we'll just have to work on controling it"
"You sure? That gonna heal?" He asked
"I still think you should stake me," Connor said.
"I've had a lot worse than this", said Lorne, grabbing his arm with his free hand and giving it a sharp pull, a few splintered bones popping back into place, "Ow. Growing up in a hell dimension is good for teaching you to heal fast"
"That's not going to happen", said Angel pointedly, crossing his arms.
"I did it with a soul, and like as not will do it again... what happens when I see a human... I can't control it."
Spike nodded, "Alright, Well peaches is about if you want sommat."
"You'll just have to try harder", said Angel watching him, "There's no easy away out of this, Connor. You have to be strong"
"I think Angel's got enough on his plate", said Lorne, before smiling, "I can take care of myself. I'm a big demon"
"I'm not like you," he said, before looking up, "for the first time, I wish I was. But I'm not. I'm not that strong."
"Alright." He replied with a sip and a wave walking back to the other.
"You are that strong", said Angel, "You're as stubborn as your mother, and she was the most stubborn person in the existance of stubborn people"
Lorne watched him go and sighed, closing his door behind the vampire, going back to tending to his wounds.
"Must not have inherited it as well as you think."
"I disagree", said Angel simply.
"Wish I could believe you."
Angel folded his arms. "Get some sleep, Connor"
Spike frowned standing beside Angel watching Connor quietly.
Connor shoved his hands in his pockets (after setting the mug aside). "It'll get out again if I sleep...."
"You have to sleep", said Angel simply, "Or you won't be strong wnough to fight it"
Connor frowned, thinking. "I'll..try."
"Good", Angel nodded
Spike handed Angel the rest of his mug comfortingly.
Connor nodded, then turned to go.
Angel gave Spike a thankfull smile. "We'll keep you together, Son", he said to Connor, "I promise"
"If you can't, kill me... It's not worth it."
"Of course it's worth it, your my son", he said pointedly.
"Not just your son... I'm a monster, I'm His son, too..." Connor whispered as he slipped out.
Angel watched him go, concern crossing his face as he looked down at the floor.
Spike sighed wrapping his arm around his waist, "Come on love."
Angel sighed, leaning into him sadly. "What am I going to do with him?"
"WE'll figure summat out."
"It's my fault", he sighed, "Again"
"Oh don't you start getting into a sulk, youll not figure anything out that way>"
"Sorry", he said quietly, "Lorne ok?"
"Yeah, I think he'll be alright."
Angel nodded, glancing the way Connor had gone again. "I hope we can fix him....I can't.."
"I know, we will." He replied kissing his temple.
"Yeah", said Angel quietly, worriedly.
Spike rubbed his back, "Come on." He replied pulling him away
Angel cast one more worried look at the door, before nodding, following Spike silently away.
L