Never Did Run Smooth, Ch. 26
Notes: This chapter should be rated A for angst. The first part is pure drama. The second half contains violence, non-con (implied), and the portrayal of a very unhealthy relationship… you know, typical fanfiction. (Seriously though folks, if you're easily triggered, stop when you get to the flashback.)
- - - - -
At times Primal wondered if he were in command of a kindergarten. Then he'd change his mind and decide it was a frat house. Then there were days it felt more like a circus, and occasionally he could swear he was on the set of a holodrama…
Today, when he heard Rhinox and Dinobot shouting at each other, the mystery was finally solved.
I'm in charge of the Pit.
He raced to find out what the matter was, only to come in on a scene straight out of his recurrent anxiety dreams. Rhinox was confronting Dinobot, who held the limp form of Rattrap in his powerful arms. The spy looked like he'd gone a round with Megatron. There was a lot of mech fluid, and obvious bite marks, and distinctive triple claw slashes that clearly pinpointed the culprit. The expression on Dinobot's face sealed that conclusion. The warrior was laden with guilt.
"Please, just let me take him to the CR chamber--"
"I don't think so. Haven't you done enough?" Rhinox reached out to yank the small burden from Dinobot's grasp. Clawed hands flexed emptily in midair, the warrior staring down at them as if dazed. His talons were stained.
"Dinobot, what happened?" Primal demanded. The Predacon looked up at him with an agitated expression.
"Optimus. I…" He shook his head. "It was an accident. We were… It got out of hand…"
"Some accident!" Rhinox was running a scanner over Rattrap hastily, his movements tense and angry. "He's ruptured two fairly major energon lines, and this shoulder's hanging on by wires. And what the hell happened to his face? Did he stick his head in your mouth?"
Dinobot flinched, and Optimus saw the guilt increase tenfold. "Rhinox, calm down. I'll handle this." In a lower voice he asked, "You were what, Dinobot? Was this a fight?"
His head jerked up sharply. "No! Nothing like that. Do you really think I would -- would --"
"What was it, then?" Primal had rarely if ever seen the warrior so panicked. He wasn't just being melodramatic, either; he was upset enough to be actually trembling. The question only seemed to agitate him further.
"I…" He bit his lip, which looked as if it had already been bitten. A thin trickle of fluid ran down his chin unheeded. "I can't tell you."
Optimus narrowed his optics. He considered questioning him further, but it probably wasn't the best time or place. He turned to watch Rhinox instead, as the engineer finished his brief examination and placed Rattrap in the CR chamber. "Is he going to be all right?"
The scowl did not leave Rhinox's face as he carefully positioned his friend. "There's no vital damage. It's mostly superficial, if extensive. The leaks are the only thing I'm worried about, and those will stop in no time." He stepped back, and the chamber hissed shut, indicator light winking on. "He'll be fine. He's seen a lot worse recently. Of course," he added nastily, "that was battlefield damage." He turned and strode towards Dinobot. "Now, would you mind telling me just what in the Pit happened?"
Dinobot bristled defensively. "That's none of your--"
Bad answer. Rhinox swung, sending the warrior sprawling to the floor. "When my friends turn up injured, you're damn right it's my business! Now if you don't explain yourself--"
"RHINOX!" Primal's voice brought him up short. The engineer fumed, fists clenched at his sides, but managed to gain control of himself. "You're not helping. I will speak with Dinobot -- you go and calm down. I know you're upset, but this isn't the way to handle it, understand?"
Rhinox heaved a sigh through his vents, and his shoulders sagged ever so slightly. "All right," he said. "All right. Sorry, Optimus. I'll leave it in your hands." He turned as if to leave, then turned back around. "But if it happens again--"
"You let me worry about that," said Optimus firmly. Rhinox thought about it, nodded reluctantly, and left, casting a backward glance at the CR chamber.
Primal reached down to help Dinobot to his feet. "Sorry. He's just upset."
"No, he's right." The warrior picked himself up without accepting the offered hand. "I deserved that, and more." He wiped a smear of mech fluid from his now profusely-bleeding mouth, glanced at it and then away, as if it were of no consequence. A slight indentation lingered on the left side of his jaw. "I suppose you have further punishment in mind."
"We'll see," said Optimus calmly. "For now, I just want to talk. Come on, there's better privacy in my quarters." (A tiny voice in the back of his mind informed him of how inappropriate that sounded. He instructed the tiny voice to shove it.)
Dinobot followed him to his room almost meekly, too wrapped up in worry and guilt to put up even a token resistance to command. That in itself was a bad sign. The raptor should be trying to defend his actions, or telling Primal to stay out of his affairs, or accusing him of not understanding Predacon ways, or… he could think of at least half a dozen things, really. Anything would have been more normal than wordless obedience. What the Pit had happened? Hopefully the raptor would feel comfortable telling him if they were alone.
Once in his quarters, Primal poured himself a drink and offered one to his guest, knowing it would probably be declined. It was. Dinobot stood tensely, arms at his sides, head lowered slightly without taking his optics off of Primal. Optimus knew that attitude. He'd seen it a lot in the first few weeks after Dinobot joined his crew. The warrior was expecting… something unpleasant to happen. Expecting it, and prepared to take it without a fight.
Primal really hadn't missed seeing him like this.
"Listen, Dinobot, I know you didn't mean to hurt Rattrap. If you'd wanted to damage him, he'd be a lot closer to offline than he is. We both know that. So why don't you tell me how he came by those injuries?"
The raptor shifted uncomfortably. "Is this discussion confidential?"
"Of course. Nothing you say here leaves this room, unless you want it to."
Now Dinobot did look away from him, apparently to compose his words. "We…" He cleared his vocalizer of static. "We were indulging in… recreational activities."
Optimus raised an eyebrow. "Recreational? Were you sparring? Or was this one of your 'friendly' arguments?" He tried not to sound accusing; he knew that for the most part the insults, bickering, and even occasional scuffles between the two were harmless and meant in good fun (even if neither of them liked to admit it). After all, Dinobot and Rattrap both had some strange ideas of recreation. But for all their squabbles, Dinobot had never actually injured Rattrap, certainly not to the point of him needing CR. In fact, now that he came to think of it… Primal could barely recall ever having seen the warrior actually strike the spy. They mostly restricted their ritual confrontations to name-calling. Childish and aggravating, but not really dangerous.
Then again, Dinobot could be a loose cannon. Optimus was well aware of what he could do if he lost control. Rattrap had provoked him into berserking at least once. If this had been another such case…
…Then Rattrap would be impaled, or sliced into fine bits. That couldn't have been it. Primal shook his head, realizing that Dinobot hadn't answered his question, that he was standing in uncertain silence. "Well? Out with it. It can't be too horrible; Rattrap's still in one piece."
"He's lucky." Dinobot scowled at the floor. "I knew it was a foolish idea. Maximals and Predacons make poor bedfellows. I should have listened to my better sense."
Optimus blinked. It took a second for the words to sink in, accompanied by a mental image that instantly made his processor ache. "Oh, Primus…" He dropped his head into his hand. "Tell me I'm not… Dinobot, did Rattrap get mauled during intimate activities?" He felt like an idiot -- either for asking, or for not thinking of it sooner.
"Of course." Without looking, he knew he was receiving Dinobot's patented How Do You Survive Being So Dense? stare. "What did you think I meant by recreation?"
"I told you! Bickering, sparring…"
"I thought you were being euphemistic."
Optimus groaned. "I don't believe this."
"I have no reason to lie!"
"I never said you were lying. This just makes no sense." He rubbed his forehead, trying not to focus on the pictures this revelation conjured. "I mean, I can understand things getting a little… out of hand, but swapping files shouldn't lead to one of you being in CR. For Prime's sake, Dinobot, does everything involve violence for you?"
For a second the warrior looked like he'd been struck. Then his expression darkened, and his optics burned brighter with anger. "Who are you to judge, Optimus? You Maximals bare your Sparks with hardly a thought. Among Predacons, a moment of vulnerability is seen as opportunity by others." He held up his bloodied claws. "To interface, you must overcome your partner's defenses, impress them with a show of strength, possibly even force them to submit. It is an act of domination, possession. Rattrap offered himself to me. He submitted, invited me to take my pleasure, and so I did. I regret harming him. I forgot his fragility in the… heat of the moment. But he is as responsible for that as I!"
Primal was taken aback. Not so much by the revelation that Rattrap had started it -- that was hardly surprising. But…
possibly even force them to submit
"Dinobot," he said very quietly, "did Rattrap say no at any point? Did he tell you to stop?"
"No." The raptor made a plosive noise of sheer frustration. "That was the problem. I tried to stop, once. He wouldn't have any of it." He held up his hand, and Primal could now see the lacerations on his fingers, some of the drying mech fluid not from Rattrap at all. "He kept goading me on, retaliating, encouraging the violence. He wanted… something. Not just interface. He took all the pain I gave him and asked for more." Dinobot let his hand drop and looked away, shaking his head. "What is wrong with that rodent?" he asked of no one in particular.
Optimus wondered the same, but that didn't stop him from sighing inwardly with relief. At least it had been consensual. If it hadn't… he honestly didn't know what he would've done. He was sure that Dinobot, with all his honor, would not force himself on another deliberately. But Primal had seen him berserk, and knew he was not always completely in control of his actions. If Rattrap pushed him to that point during 'intimate activities', he might not be able to stop. Primus, that would be a nightmare.
"Well, I suggest you be more careful next time," he told the warrior. "Assuming there is a next time."
Dinobot shrugged without looking at him. "That depends. Are you going to order me to keep away from him?"
Primal didn't miss the tone of his voice. "Do you want me to?"
The raptor lowered his head, staring at the floor. "It would make things… simpler. Spare me the burden of having to end it myself."
Optimus folded his arms. "I'm not going to do that, Dinobot, for two reasons. One, I know damn well neither of you listens to my orders unless you feel like it." Dinobot grunted in acknowledgement of the fact. "And two, I think it would do more harm than good if I did. You two are good for each other. Mostly. When Rattrap isn't getting mauled, anyway." He winced at how that sounded; he'd meant it lightheartedly, but he doubted Dinobot was in a joking mood. "Obviously you've got some issues to work out. It has to be the strangest relationship I've seen in a long time. But -- don't tell Rattrap I said this, please -- I'd much rather have you two together and have to deal with things like this, than deal with the fallout of separating you. I'm not going to make that call. I'm sure you can work this out between yourselves, like reasonable adults."
Dinobot finally looked at him, and his expression suggested that Optimus had probably been drinking. "How long have you known us, again?"
Surprised, Primal burst out laughing. The wry humor was a welcome sign. Dinobot must be getting over his angst. "Hey, at least things won't get boring. Just try to reel it in a little, all right? We can't have our saboteur in CR every other day. The peace and quiet would be refreshing, but I don't think I could get used to it."
A ghost of a smile pulled at Dinobot's lips. "One does become accustomed to the presence of vermin. The base is not the same without his pervasive stench."
"Funny, he says the same about you."
"I'm sure he says a great deal about me."
"You know he means it in the nicest possible way."
Dinobot laughed -- a short, sharp, slightly cynical sound, but still the first laugh Primal had heard from him in weeks. Optimus finally relaxed. He'd envisioned weeks of the two Maximals refusing to talk to each other, or even stand in the same room. It would have been awkward, stressful, and disrupted operations for Primus knew how long. Eventually they'd have come to their senses -- barring one of them dying or leaving the planet entirely, he didn't think anything could keep them away from each other indefinitely -- but in the meantime, he'd have another headache to deal with. If he had to step in and play relationship counselor to avert such drama, so be it. It wasn't really part of his official responsibilities, but that was true of many things he'd had to deal with since they were stranded here.
"I suppose I need to have a talk with him," said Dinobot resignedly. "I'll do it tomorrow. The day has been long enough for me."
"And me," said Optimus. "Alright, you're dismissed. Go get yourself patched up."
The warrior looked wryly at his hands. "Ahh, yes. Go to the engineer, who would probably love to have my head on a plate right now, and ask him to repair some minor wounds acquired while injuring his friend." He snorted. "You need rest more than I do, Optimus, if your grasp of logic is slipping so."
Right. Silly me. "I'll have a talk with Rhinox, see if I can get him to calm down. But in the meantime…" He sighed. "…staying away from him is probably not a bad idea. I guess you can manage without treatment."
"A few bitten fingers aren't going to kill me. They'll be healed by morning." Dinobot picked a shred of loose skin off his hand with an impassive expression, and Optimus tried not to wince. "I'll be taking my leave, then. Are you… certain there's nothing else?"
Primal knew what he was asking. The Predacon didn't understand forgiveness. He expected to pay for his transgressions, intentional or otherwise. "Do you think there should be?"
"I injured a teammate."
"By accident. Unless you're lying, which I highly doubt, Rattrap is as responsible as you. Should I punish you both?"
Dinobot considered that for a long moment. Finally his shoulders slumped, an almost imperceptible gesture of surrender. "It won't happen again," he assured his commander.
"I believe you."
"Should I make the same promise to Rhinox?"
Primal almost flinched at the mental image that invoked. "No. Leave that to me. For Prime's sake, go and get some rest. You were on death's door a few days ago, remember?"
"Oh, yes. I remember." The raptor turned wearily and headed for the door. He seemed drained, the perpetual fight gone out of him. Rarely did Optimus get a chance to see him like this. It always brought out his protective instincts. Ordinarily Dinobot struck him as the last person he had to protect -- in fact, not uncommonly he was the one defending his commander -- but on occasion his armor wore thin and one could see a tired, heavily scarred creature, barely half the age his lined face suggested, dragging his sword from one battle to the next as if there were no other path to take. It wrenched Primal to the core, and he wondered sometimes if the others who worked for Megatron were like that, if there was something just as sad in all of them. Then stopped himself from wondering, because that sort of sympathetic thinking would lose them the war in an instant.
"Dinobot," he said abruptly, and the warrior stopped without turning around, waiting. "I know how you think, and I can understand it given where you've come from, but… interfacing doesn't have to be a battle. It's supposed to be an act of trust, at least for us. I don't think Rattrap will hurt you."
"Nor do I." His shoulders sagged. "It wasn't a matter of trust this time, merely habit. I wasn't sure what to do, so I fell back on experience. I acted as I would have with-- with a Predacon. It was a mistake."
He must be tired. He almost slipped and said a name. Knowing that he was not likely to get the warrior in such an honest and revealing mood again anytime soon, Optimus went for broke. "If I might ask, what experience? I take it Rattrap wasn't the first, but…"
Dinobot turned, bringing his jagged profile into view, a single glowing red optic looking over his shoulder at Primal. "I am tired, Optimus. I'll be in my quarters if you need me." And with that he walked out, not waiting to be dismissed again, leaving the question unanswered.
- - - - -
His shoulder plating threatened to buckle under the merciless grip, but he refused to show the pain. To flinch or avert his optics from the mech in front of him would earn him much worse, and moreover, would be an admission of weakness. He was not weak. He would not disgrace himself before his leader.
"I should have you scrapped," said the other in his smooth, deceptive voice, a slight edge to his tone the only indicator of displeasure. "Were you any other servant of mine…"
"Your other servants would not dare question you. They are cowards." His head snapped abruptly to one side as he was struck, not particularly hard -- mostly as a reminder not to interrupt.
"They have more sense than you. As I was saying, another mech in your place would be dead." The hand which had delivered the blow now cupped his chin, turning his head back so they were once again optic-to-optic. "But you, my dear lieutenant, would be difficult to replace. So what am I to do?" The grip on his jaw tightened. "I can't tolerate insubordination. What will it take to remind you of your place?"
He knew better than to answer. Instead he glared, letting his optics do the speaking. The ones he was looking into narrowed in response.
Abruptly he was flung away, striking the floor with a loud clatter of metal on metal. He rolled to get his feet under him and started to rise, but a heavy blow across the back brought him down again. He felt a heel press down between his shoulders, pinning him in place. "Don't make this any harder than it is, Dinobot. Do you really want to fight me again?"
In response, he twisted sharply to one side. The foot slipped from his shoulder, and he grabbed it by the ankle and jerked, bringing his attacker to the floor with him. Then he sprang onto the larger mech. "We'll see what it takes to remind you -- I did not join you out of unquestioning obedience! I am a warrior, not a mindless drone!"
He landed several blows before a hand shot up and latched onto his throat. "If you follow me, you WILL obey without question! I think I've made clear by now what happens to those who don't!" The other hand caught his fist in mid-swing and squeezed. There was a creaking, followed by a popping as joints dislocated. "But if you need another demonstration, I will gladly provide it."
"Slag you!"
The other was on his feet in an instant, slamming Dinobot back against a wall. "Keep pushing. I may decide to destroy you yet."
The hand around his throat was leaving dents, and his feet were almost dangling off the floor. He reacted out of reflex, bringing his knee up sharply, pointed shinguard digging into the other's abdomen. The other stumbled back, not much, but enough to drop him. Dinobot staggered for a second, then recovered.
"Do it then, and get it over with!" he snapped. "It would be the first promise to me you've actually kept!"
"Ingrate."
"Megalomaniac!"
"COWARD."
Livid, he charged. He should have seen through the ploy, seen the weapon being drawn, but he didn't… until it was too late.
Just as he reached his target, drawing back his hand to strike, a bolt of searing pain shot through his hip and paralyzed half his body. Dinobot screeched in fury, pitching forward onto his face as the other mech moved aside. For several seconds he lay twitching in uncontrollable spasms, his entire sensornet tingling. When he finally lifted his head, he recognized what had brought him down.
"That was more effective than I'd hoped. No wonder Maximal enforcers are so fond of these." The larger mech held a stunner, a simple rod no longer than his forearm with a pair of electrical prongs at the end. Dinobot was well acquainted with such devices. "It's said they can bring down the most violent of mechs, if you apply them to the right parts of the body. I appreciate you giving me an opportunity to test that out."
Dinobot snarled. "That was a dishonorable trick."
"Which is why you keep losing to me. Hm. Now, where were we?"
White agony flared in his processor as the stunner was jabbed into the back his neck. Dinobot screamed something unintelligible into the floor. He writhed and thrashed, but couldn't get his limbs coordinated to reach up and grab the Pitspawned thing. When it withdrew, he simply went limp, too weak to move for the moment. He hated the feeling.
A hand grabbed his arm, rolled him onto his back. He lay still, feeling strength gradually returning to his limbs. The same hand ran over his face, and he resisted the urge to bite, pretending he was still in the grip of paralysis. He tried not to tense as it moved down his chestplate and along the seams that marked the borders of his armor panels.
The larger mech chuckled, bending close now, his weight pinning Dinobot to the floor. "You seem much more cooperative now. Are you ready to yield, or do you need further persuasion?"
The stunner was still in his other hand, carelessly close. Dinobot found that he could move his fingers again. He distracted the other by straining his vocalizer, apparently trying to form words.
"Take your time regaining the power of speech. I can be patient--"
The larger mech's gloating was cut off by a bellow of agony as Dinobot jabbed the spanner into a gap in his abdominal plating, sending several thousand volts through the sensitive circuitry. "Here is my answer," said the warrior. "Take it!" He managed to heave the spasming body off to the side. Then he fell back, still not recovered from his own ordeal, listening to the other's gasping and groaning.
He would pay for that. But at least he hadn't yielded without a fight.
A minute later, he felt the barrel of a fusion cannon against his cheek. "You… shouldn't… have done that," said the other through gritted teeth. "Now I am… MOST upset. Yesss."
…
Pain.
…
Shouting.
…
Impacts, and finally blackness.
Dinobot's optics brightened suddenly, the harsh hissing of his vents loud in the stillness. He sat up, pushing off a phantom weight, and drew his sword. The point trembled slightly, betraying the unsteadiness of his hand. He was alone… but the shadows seemed to whisper with malicious intent.
"Get out," he said aloud, disoriented.
A laugh echoed faintly in his mind. "And how do you intend to make me? I've ensured that I will always be with you."
"Not here," he said. "Get out."
"You can run from me out there, Dinobot, but you can't escape your own mind. You shouldn't have let me in. But then, I didn't leave you much choice, did I?"
Of course he hadn't. That was the Predacon way. But he no longer had such opportunities… and all things would fade with time. "You can't live in my head forever. I will forget you. I will forget all of it!"
"Go on back to sleep, then, and have another dream. See how easy it is to forget."
The warrior ground his teeth. He tried to lie back down, but his body wouldn't respond. His joints were locked rigid, cables tensed. His hands gripped the hilt of his sword. He sat staring into the darkness, knowing that he was alone, safe, and had nothing to fear. He cursed himself for weakness.
But he did not, could not, return to sleep. And the voice haunting his mind knew it, and laughed.
- - - - -
At times Primal wondered if he were in command of a kindergarten. Then he'd change his mind and decide it was a frat house. Then there were days it felt more like a circus, and occasionally he could swear he was on the set of a holodrama…
Today, when he heard Rhinox and Dinobot shouting at each other, the mystery was finally solved.
I'm in charge of the Pit.
He raced to find out what the matter was, only to come in on a scene straight out of his recurrent anxiety dreams. Rhinox was confronting Dinobot, who held the limp form of Rattrap in his powerful arms. The spy looked like he'd gone a round with Megatron. There was a lot of mech fluid, and obvious bite marks, and distinctive triple claw slashes that clearly pinpointed the culprit. The expression on Dinobot's face sealed that conclusion. The warrior was laden with guilt.
"Please, just let me take him to the CR chamber--"
"I don't think so. Haven't you done enough?" Rhinox reached out to yank the small burden from Dinobot's grasp. Clawed hands flexed emptily in midair, the warrior staring down at them as if dazed. His talons were stained.
"Dinobot, what happened?" Primal demanded. The Predacon looked up at him with an agitated expression.
"Optimus. I…" He shook his head. "It was an accident. We were… It got out of hand…"
"Some accident!" Rhinox was running a scanner over Rattrap hastily, his movements tense and angry. "He's ruptured two fairly major energon lines, and this shoulder's hanging on by wires. And what the hell happened to his face? Did he stick his head in your mouth?"
Dinobot flinched, and Optimus saw the guilt increase tenfold. "Rhinox, calm down. I'll handle this." In a lower voice he asked, "You were what, Dinobot? Was this a fight?"
His head jerked up sharply. "No! Nothing like that. Do you really think I would -- would --"
"What was it, then?" Primal had rarely if ever seen the warrior so panicked. He wasn't just being melodramatic, either; he was upset enough to be actually trembling. The question only seemed to agitate him further.
"I…" He bit his lip, which looked as if it had already been bitten. A thin trickle of fluid ran down his chin unheeded. "I can't tell you."
Optimus narrowed his optics. He considered questioning him further, but it probably wasn't the best time or place. He turned to watch Rhinox instead, as the engineer finished his brief examination and placed Rattrap in the CR chamber. "Is he going to be all right?"
The scowl did not leave Rhinox's face as he carefully positioned his friend. "There's no vital damage. It's mostly superficial, if extensive. The leaks are the only thing I'm worried about, and those will stop in no time." He stepped back, and the chamber hissed shut, indicator light winking on. "He'll be fine. He's seen a lot worse recently. Of course," he added nastily, "that was battlefield damage." He turned and strode towards Dinobot. "Now, would you mind telling me just what in the Pit happened?"
Dinobot bristled defensively. "That's none of your--"
Bad answer. Rhinox swung, sending the warrior sprawling to the floor. "When my friends turn up injured, you're damn right it's my business! Now if you don't explain yourself--"
"RHINOX!" Primal's voice brought him up short. The engineer fumed, fists clenched at his sides, but managed to gain control of himself. "You're not helping. I will speak with Dinobot -- you go and calm down. I know you're upset, but this isn't the way to handle it, understand?"
Rhinox heaved a sigh through his vents, and his shoulders sagged ever so slightly. "All right," he said. "All right. Sorry, Optimus. I'll leave it in your hands." He turned as if to leave, then turned back around. "But if it happens again--"
"You let me worry about that," said Optimus firmly. Rhinox thought about it, nodded reluctantly, and left, casting a backward glance at the CR chamber.
Primal reached down to help Dinobot to his feet. "Sorry. He's just upset."
"No, he's right." The warrior picked himself up without accepting the offered hand. "I deserved that, and more." He wiped a smear of mech fluid from his now profusely-bleeding mouth, glanced at it and then away, as if it were of no consequence. A slight indentation lingered on the left side of his jaw. "I suppose you have further punishment in mind."
"We'll see," said Optimus calmly. "For now, I just want to talk. Come on, there's better privacy in my quarters." (A tiny voice in the back of his mind informed him of how inappropriate that sounded. He instructed the tiny voice to shove it.)
Dinobot followed him to his room almost meekly, too wrapped up in worry and guilt to put up even a token resistance to command. That in itself was a bad sign. The raptor should be trying to defend his actions, or telling Primal to stay out of his affairs, or accusing him of not understanding Predacon ways, or… he could think of at least half a dozen things, really. Anything would have been more normal than wordless obedience. What the Pit had happened? Hopefully the raptor would feel comfortable telling him if they were alone.
Once in his quarters, Primal poured himself a drink and offered one to his guest, knowing it would probably be declined. It was. Dinobot stood tensely, arms at his sides, head lowered slightly without taking his optics off of Primal. Optimus knew that attitude. He'd seen it a lot in the first few weeks after Dinobot joined his crew. The warrior was expecting… something unpleasant to happen. Expecting it, and prepared to take it without a fight.
Primal really hadn't missed seeing him like this.
"Listen, Dinobot, I know you didn't mean to hurt Rattrap. If you'd wanted to damage him, he'd be a lot closer to offline than he is. We both know that. So why don't you tell me how he came by those injuries?"
The raptor shifted uncomfortably. "Is this discussion confidential?"
"Of course. Nothing you say here leaves this room, unless you want it to."
Now Dinobot did look away from him, apparently to compose his words. "We…" He cleared his vocalizer of static. "We were indulging in… recreational activities."
Optimus raised an eyebrow. "Recreational? Were you sparring? Or was this one of your 'friendly' arguments?" He tried not to sound accusing; he knew that for the most part the insults, bickering, and even occasional scuffles between the two were harmless and meant in good fun (even if neither of them liked to admit it). After all, Dinobot and Rattrap both had some strange ideas of recreation. But for all their squabbles, Dinobot had never actually injured Rattrap, certainly not to the point of him needing CR. In fact, now that he came to think of it… Primal could barely recall ever having seen the warrior actually strike the spy. They mostly restricted their ritual confrontations to name-calling. Childish and aggravating, but not really dangerous.
Then again, Dinobot could be a loose cannon. Optimus was well aware of what he could do if he lost control. Rattrap had provoked him into berserking at least once. If this had been another such case…
…Then Rattrap would be impaled, or sliced into fine bits. That couldn't have been it. Primal shook his head, realizing that Dinobot hadn't answered his question, that he was standing in uncertain silence. "Well? Out with it. It can't be too horrible; Rattrap's still in one piece."
"He's lucky." Dinobot scowled at the floor. "I knew it was a foolish idea. Maximals and Predacons make poor bedfellows. I should have listened to my better sense."
Optimus blinked. It took a second for the words to sink in, accompanied by a mental image that instantly made his processor ache. "Oh, Primus…" He dropped his head into his hand. "Tell me I'm not… Dinobot, did Rattrap get mauled during intimate activities?" He felt like an idiot -- either for asking, or for not thinking of it sooner.
"Of course." Without looking, he knew he was receiving Dinobot's patented How Do You Survive Being So Dense? stare. "What did you think I meant by recreation?"
"I told you! Bickering, sparring…"
"I thought you were being euphemistic."
Optimus groaned. "I don't believe this."
"I have no reason to lie!"
"I never said you were lying. This just makes no sense." He rubbed his forehead, trying not to focus on the pictures this revelation conjured. "I mean, I can understand things getting a little… out of hand, but swapping files shouldn't lead to one of you being in CR. For Prime's sake, Dinobot, does everything involve violence for you?"
For a second the warrior looked like he'd been struck. Then his expression darkened, and his optics burned brighter with anger. "Who are you to judge, Optimus? You Maximals bare your Sparks with hardly a thought. Among Predacons, a moment of vulnerability is seen as opportunity by others." He held up his bloodied claws. "To interface, you must overcome your partner's defenses, impress them with a show of strength, possibly even force them to submit. It is an act of domination, possession. Rattrap offered himself to me. He submitted, invited me to take my pleasure, and so I did. I regret harming him. I forgot his fragility in the… heat of the moment. But he is as responsible for that as I!"
Primal was taken aback. Not so much by the revelation that Rattrap had started it -- that was hardly surprising. But…
possibly even force them to submit
"Dinobot," he said very quietly, "did Rattrap say no at any point? Did he tell you to stop?"
"No." The raptor made a plosive noise of sheer frustration. "That was the problem. I tried to stop, once. He wouldn't have any of it." He held up his hand, and Primal could now see the lacerations on his fingers, some of the drying mech fluid not from Rattrap at all. "He kept goading me on, retaliating, encouraging the violence. He wanted… something. Not just interface. He took all the pain I gave him and asked for more." Dinobot let his hand drop and looked away, shaking his head. "What is wrong with that rodent?" he asked of no one in particular.
Optimus wondered the same, but that didn't stop him from sighing inwardly with relief. At least it had been consensual. If it hadn't… he honestly didn't know what he would've done. He was sure that Dinobot, with all his honor, would not force himself on another deliberately. But Primal had seen him berserk, and knew he was not always completely in control of his actions. If Rattrap pushed him to that point during 'intimate activities', he might not be able to stop. Primus, that would be a nightmare.
"Well, I suggest you be more careful next time," he told the warrior. "Assuming there is a next time."
Dinobot shrugged without looking at him. "That depends. Are you going to order me to keep away from him?"
Primal didn't miss the tone of his voice. "Do you want me to?"
The raptor lowered his head, staring at the floor. "It would make things… simpler. Spare me the burden of having to end it myself."
Optimus folded his arms. "I'm not going to do that, Dinobot, for two reasons. One, I know damn well neither of you listens to my orders unless you feel like it." Dinobot grunted in acknowledgement of the fact. "And two, I think it would do more harm than good if I did. You two are good for each other. Mostly. When Rattrap isn't getting mauled, anyway." He winced at how that sounded; he'd meant it lightheartedly, but he doubted Dinobot was in a joking mood. "Obviously you've got some issues to work out. It has to be the strangest relationship I've seen in a long time. But -- don't tell Rattrap I said this, please -- I'd much rather have you two together and have to deal with things like this, than deal with the fallout of separating you. I'm not going to make that call. I'm sure you can work this out between yourselves, like reasonable adults."
Dinobot finally looked at him, and his expression suggested that Optimus had probably been drinking. "How long have you known us, again?"
Surprised, Primal burst out laughing. The wry humor was a welcome sign. Dinobot must be getting over his angst. "Hey, at least things won't get boring. Just try to reel it in a little, all right? We can't have our saboteur in CR every other day. The peace and quiet would be refreshing, but I don't think I could get used to it."
A ghost of a smile pulled at Dinobot's lips. "One does become accustomed to the presence of vermin. The base is not the same without his pervasive stench."
"Funny, he says the same about you."
"I'm sure he says a great deal about me."
"You know he means it in the nicest possible way."
Dinobot laughed -- a short, sharp, slightly cynical sound, but still the first laugh Primal had heard from him in weeks. Optimus finally relaxed. He'd envisioned weeks of the two Maximals refusing to talk to each other, or even stand in the same room. It would have been awkward, stressful, and disrupted operations for Primus knew how long. Eventually they'd have come to their senses -- barring one of them dying or leaving the planet entirely, he didn't think anything could keep them away from each other indefinitely -- but in the meantime, he'd have another headache to deal with. If he had to step in and play relationship counselor to avert such drama, so be it. It wasn't really part of his official responsibilities, but that was true of many things he'd had to deal with since they were stranded here.
"I suppose I need to have a talk with him," said Dinobot resignedly. "I'll do it tomorrow. The day has been long enough for me."
"And me," said Optimus. "Alright, you're dismissed. Go get yourself patched up."
The warrior looked wryly at his hands. "Ahh, yes. Go to the engineer, who would probably love to have my head on a plate right now, and ask him to repair some minor wounds acquired while injuring his friend." He snorted. "You need rest more than I do, Optimus, if your grasp of logic is slipping so."
Right. Silly me. "I'll have a talk with Rhinox, see if I can get him to calm down. But in the meantime…" He sighed. "…staying away from him is probably not a bad idea. I guess you can manage without treatment."
"A few bitten fingers aren't going to kill me. They'll be healed by morning." Dinobot picked a shred of loose skin off his hand with an impassive expression, and Optimus tried not to wince. "I'll be taking my leave, then. Are you… certain there's nothing else?"
Primal knew what he was asking. The Predacon didn't understand forgiveness. He expected to pay for his transgressions, intentional or otherwise. "Do you think there should be?"
"I injured a teammate."
"By accident. Unless you're lying, which I highly doubt, Rattrap is as responsible as you. Should I punish you both?"
Dinobot considered that for a long moment. Finally his shoulders slumped, an almost imperceptible gesture of surrender. "It won't happen again," he assured his commander.
"I believe you."
"Should I make the same promise to Rhinox?"
Primal almost flinched at the mental image that invoked. "No. Leave that to me. For Prime's sake, go and get some rest. You were on death's door a few days ago, remember?"
"Oh, yes. I remember." The raptor turned wearily and headed for the door. He seemed drained, the perpetual fight gone out of him. Rarely did Optimus get a chance to see him like this. It always brought out his protective instincts. Ordinarily Dinobot struck him as the last person he had to protect -- in fact, not uncommonly he was the one defending his commander -- but on occasion his armor wore thin and one could see a tired, heavily scarred creature, barely half the age his lined face suggested, dragging his sword from one battle to the next as if there were no other path to take. It wrenched Primal to the core, and he wondered sometimes if the others who worked for Megatron were like that, if there was something just as sad in all of them. Then stopped himself from wondering, because that sort of sympathetic thinking would lose them the war in an instant.
"Dinobot," he said abruptly, and the warrior stopped without turning around, waiting. "I know how you think, and I can understand it given where you've come from, but… interfacing doesn't have to be a battle. It's supposed to be an act of trust, at least for us. I don't think Rattrap will hurt you."
"Nor do I." His shoulders sagged. "It wasn't a matter of trust this time, merely habit. I wasn't sure what to do, so I fell back on experience. I acted as I would have with-- with a Predacon. It was a mistake."
He must be tired. He almost slipped and said a name. Knowing that he was not likely to get the warrior in such an honest and revealing mood again anytime soon, Optimus went for broke. "If I might ask, what experience? I take it Rattrap wasn't the first, but…"
Dinobot turned, bringing his jagged profile into view, a single glowing red optic looking over his shoulder at Primal. "I am tired, Optimus. I'll be in my quarters if you need me." And with that he walked out, not waiting to be dismissed again, leaving the question unanswered.
- - - - -
His shoulder plating threatened to buckle under the merciless grip, but he refused to show the pain. To flinch or avert his optics from the mech in front of him would earn him much worse, and moreover, would be an admission of weakness. He was not weak. He would not disgrace himself before his leader.
"I should have you scrapped," said the other in his smooth, deceptive voice, a slight edge to his tone the only indicator of displeasure. "Were you any other servant of mine…"
"Your other servants would not dare question you. They are cowards." His head snapped abruptly to one side as he was struck, not particularly hard -- mostly as a reminder not to interrupt.
"They have more sense than you. As I was saying, another mech in your place would be dead." The hand which had delivered the blow now cupped his chin, turning his head back so they were once again optic-to-optic. "But you, my dear lieutenant, would be difficult to replace. So what am I to do?" The grip on his jaw tightened. "I can't tolerate insubordination. What will it take to remind you of your place?"
He knew better than to answer. Instead he glared, letting his optics do the speaking. The ones he was looking into narrowed in response.
Abruptly he was flung away, striking the floor with a loud clatter of metal on metal. He rolled to get his feet under him and started to rise, but a heavy blow across the back brought him down again. He felt a heel press down between his shoulders, pinning him in place. "Don't make this any harder than it is, Dinobot. Do you really want to fight me again?"
In response, he twisted sharply to one side. The foot slipped from his shoulder, and he grabbed it by the ankle and jerked, bringing his attacker to the floor with him. Then he sprang onto the larger mech. "We'll see what it takes to remind you -- I did not join you out of unquestioning obedience! I am a warrior, not a mindless drone!"
He landed several blows before a hand shot up and latched onto his throat. "If you follow me, you WILL obey without question! I think I've made clear by now what happens to those who don't!" The other hand caught his fist in mid-swing and squeezed. There was a creaking, followed by a popping as joints dislocated. "But if you need another demonstration, I will gladly provide it."
"Slag you!"
The other was on his feet in an instant, slamming Dinobot back against a wall. "Keep pushing. I may decide to destroy you yet."
The hand around his throat was leaving dents, and his feet were almost dangling off the floor. He reacted out of reflex, bringing his knee up sharply, pointed shinguard digging into the other's abdomen. The other stumbled back, not much, but enough to drop him. Dinobot staggered for a second, then recovered.
"Do it then, and get it over with!" he snapped. "It would be the first promise to me you've actually kept!"
"Ingrate."
"Megalomaniac!"
"COWARD."
Livid, he charged. He should have seen through the ploy, seen the weapon being drawn, but he didn't… until it was too late.
Just as he reached his target, drawing back his hand to strike, a bolt of searing pain shot through his hip and paralyzed half his body. Dinobot screeched in fury, pitching forward onto his face as the other mech moved aside. For several seconds he lay twitching in uncontrollable spasms, his entire sensornet tingling. When he finally lifted his head, he recognized what had brought him down.
"That was more effective than I'd hoped. No wonder Maximal enforcers are so fond of these." The larger mech held a stunner, a simple rod no longer than his forearm with a pair of electrical prongs at the end. Dinobot was well acquainted with such devices. "It's said they can bring down the most violent of mechs, if you apply them to the right parts of the body. I appreciate you giving me an opportunity to test that out."
Dinobot snarled. "That was a dishonorable trick."
"Which is why you keep losing to me. Hm. Now, where were we?"
White agony flared in his processor as the stunner was jabbed into the back his neck. Dinobot screamed something unintelligible into the floor. He writhed and thrashed, but couldn't get his limbs coordinated to reach up and grab the Pitspawned thing. When it withdrew, he simply went limp, too weak to move for the moment. He hated the feeling.
A hand grabbed his arm, rolled him onto his back. He lay still, feeling strength gradually returning to his limbs. The same hand ran over his face, and he resisted the urge to bite, pretending he was still in the grip of paralysis. He tried not to tense as it moved down his chestplate and along the seams that marked the borders of his armor panels.
The larger mech chuckled, bending close now, his weight pinning Dinobot to the floor. "You seem much more cooperative now. Are you ready to yield, or do you need further persuasion?"
The stunner was still in his other hand, carelessly close. Dinobot found that he could move his fingers again. He distracted the other by straining his vocalizer, apparently trying to form words.
"Take your time regaining the power of speech. I can be patient--"
The larger mech's gloating was cut off by a bellow of agony as Dinobot jabbed the spanner into a gap in his abdominal plating, sending several thousand volts through the sensitive circuitry. "Here is my answer," said the warrior. "Take it!" He managed to heave the spasming body off to the side. Then he fell back, still not recovered from his own ordeal, listening to the other's gasping and groaning.
He would pay for that. But at least he hadn't yielded without a fight.
A minute later, he felt the barrel of a fusion cannon against his cheek. "You… shouldn't… have done that," said the other through gritted teeth. "Now I am… MOST upset. Yesss."
…
Pain.
…
Shouting.
…
Impacts, and finally blackness.
Dinobot's optics brightened suddenly, the harsh hissing of his vents loud in the stillness. He sat up, pushing off a phantom weight, and drew his sword. The point trembled slightly, betraying the unsteadiness of his hand. He was alone… but the shadows seemed to whisper with malicious intent.
"Get out," he said aloud, disoriented.
A laugh echoed faintly in his mind. "And how do you intend to make me? I've ensured that I will always be with you."
"Not here," he said. "Get out."
"You can run from me out there, Dinobot, but you can't escape your own mind. You shouldn't have let me in. But then, I didn't leave you much choice, did I?"
Of course he hadn't. That was the Predacon way. But he no longer had such opportunities… and all things would fade with time. "You can't live in my head forever. I will forget you. I will forget all of it!"
"Go on back to sleep, then, and have another dream. See how easy it is to forget."
The warrior ground his teeth. He tried to lie back down, but his body wouldn't respond. His joints were locked rigid, cables tensed. His hands gripped the hilt of his sword. He sat staring into the darkness, knowing that he was alone, safe, and had nothing to fear. He cursed himself for weakness.
But he did not, could not, return to sleep. And the voice haunting his mind knew it, and laughed.