Never Did Run Smooth, Ch. 28
Megatron is a dick. Rattrap is trying to apologize for being a dick. Dinobot seems to be addicted to dicks.
- - - - -
Dinobot spun to face the threat, tail raised, claws spread wide, bloody fangs bared. "Get out," he growled. He moved, ever so subtly, to place himself in front of Rattrap. The spy wondered if it was subconscious or deliberate.
'Preciate the sentiment, Lizard Lips, but it ain't necessary. Transforming, Rattrap drew his pistol and stepped out from behind the raptor to stand flank-to-flank with him. A few meters of brush and a small stream were all that separated them from the tyrant. "How long you been eavesdroppin', Grapeface? Don't tell me you got nothin' better to do."
Megatron looked amused. "Oh, I was here before you, vermin. Dinobot should have sensed my presence some time ago, but it seems he was… preoccupied."
The warrior started violently. It was possible, of course, that Megatron was lying. But if he was telling the truth, and he really had been lurking here the whole time… Dinobot did not like the implications.
"Your time among the Maximals has softened you, Dinobot. In more ways than one." Megatron's glance flicked from the warrior to the spy. "Your standards have fallen, as well. I never would have guessed that you would settle for so little."
The raptor's eyes narrowed, his fists clenching. Then he lifted his lip in a sneer. "Hm. If you mean the vile, wretched pestilence who should be standing behind me…" He shot Rattrap a quick glare. "I assure you, I've had much worse."
Megatron's tail lashed once, tightly, from side to side. He didn't seem to like what Dinobot was implying. But he quickly masked his displeasure with a smooth smile. "Such ingratitude. On second thought, vermin, I believe you two deserve each other. One mech's trash is another mech's treasure… and you do have a taste for garbage."
The spy checked his angry outburst and gave the Predacon leader his smarmiest smirk instead. "What can I say? It's amazin' what some mechs throw away."
Dinobot snarled. "Let me fight my own battles, rodent!" He transformed hastily and drew his sword, pushing Rattrap aside. "Why waste time talking, Megatron? If it's a rematch you want, I will gladly oblige!"
The tyrant chuckled. "Oh, not at all, not at all. Do you see my weapon drawn? Am I not still in beastmode, standing here at a respectable distance? I only wish to talk, Dinobot. Can't we have a civil conversation, for old times' sake?"
"As I recall," the warrior said darkly, "our former conversations were anything but civil." Nevertheless, he reluctantly sheathed his sword. Megatron had played on his sense of honor with a skill born of practice. Dinobot couldn't justify attacking an unarmed opponent, now that he'd been called out on it.
Rattrap groaned. "Ahh, don't tell me you're fallin' for that! Weapon drawn or no, he's a threat, an' I only got one response to threats." His finger tightened slowly on the trigger. A clawed hand wrapped around the barrel of the pistol and jerked it downward.
"He's not making threats, he's trying to provoke us. Primus knows what he has up his sleeve." Dinobot didn't take his optics off of Megatron as he spoke. "The best thing to do would be to walk away. He won't follow."
A big, spine-chilling grin curved the tyrannosaur's jaws. "Walk away? That doesn't sound like the Dinobot I knew. And I knew him so very well, yess." He licked his lips, noting the change in the warrior's expression, the sudden rigid tension of his body. "Why, there was a time I trusted him more than any of my followers. Did he tell you about that, vermin? He was my staunchest supporter… weren't you, my pet? Loyal to his Core."
Rattrap felt the fur bristling on his back at the way Megatron spoke about Dinobot -- spoke to him. It felt like something nasty had slithered through his circuits. I don't care what Chopperface says, I'm puttin' a round between that bastard's eyes if he don't shut the frag up in about two seconds.
"He told me everything, Scaleface. You really think I care? He may've been loyal to you once, but he's one of us now." He raised the pistol again, waving it threateningly while keeping the barrel pointed in Megatron's general direction. "I really suggest you let it go already. 'Cause this jealousy o' yours? Is gettin' to be a real pain."
Megatron looked incredulous for a second, then laughed. "Jealous? Oh, Rattrap. Why would I be jealous? After all…" He smirked at Dinobot. "I had him first."
Something inside the spy lurched to a halt, like he'd been punched in the gut. Rattrap glanced at the warrior, and from the murder in Dinobot's optics he guessed that Megatron was telling the truth for once. Images he'd forcibly suppressed for months poured into his processor. It wasn't a huge surprise. He'd suspected it for a long time, really, but it was one thing to suspect and another to hear it said in that slick, oily voice, a voice that made his beastflesh want to crawl right off of his frame. He couldn't stop a visible shudder of revulsion from rattling every joint in his body.
"Hmm?" Megatron cocked his head. "Well, well. It seems he didn't tell you everything after all."
It was Dinobot who responded, as Rattrap's wits seemed to have temporarily failed him. "Are you finished? If so, then remove yourself from our presence before I do something dishonorable." His entire body was quivering like a high-tension wire, and his claws flexed angrily at his sides.
"Oh, yes. We wouldn't want that, would we?" The tyrant retreated a step. "Very well. The two of you obviously have some things to work out, in any case. Best of luck with that, yes." He turned to leave… and then turned back for a final jab. "If you need advice, Dinobot, you know where to find me. Don't forget who taught you how to please a partner. From the look of those dents, I'd say you learned quite well."
Dinobot roared so suddenly that Rattrap jumped. His optics flashed green, and Megatron ducked with a reflex that spoke of practice. The destructive beam grazed his back and annihilated a young tree behind him, showering him with charred leaves and bark.
"Tempt not too much the hatred of my spirit, for I am sick when I do look on thee!" The warrior's voice was hoarse, and thick with an accent Rattrap couldn't place. He fired again, and again, knocking branches off of the trees above Megatron's head. He wasn't even aiming at the tyrant now -- just trying to bring half the forest down on top of him, apparently. The spot where Megatron had been standing was swiftly buried in foliage. The noise was deafening, and Rattrap covered his audio receptors, taking cover instinctively behind a tree while Dinobot expended his rage.
When the rending, crackling and splintering sounds finally ceased, the spy peeked cautiously out. Dinobot stood with his feet planted apart in a fighting stance, shoulders heaving, sword hanging heavily at his side. For dozens of yards in front of him the trees lay shattered and smoking, and there was no sign of Megatron. The warrior didn't seem to realize the danger had passed, however; his optics still had a wild light in them, blazing at something Rattrap couldn't see. The spy approached him cautiously, ready to beat a hasty retreat if need be.
"Dinobot?" The figure didn't waver. "Dinobot!" He was still staring intently into the trees. "Yo, Chopperface! We should get outta here."
The warrior's optics flickered. He shook his head quickly as if to clear it, then looked around. Finding no trace of Megatron, his gaze fell on Rattrap. "Yes. We… should leave." He spoke mechanically, his mind still distracted. Without another word he transformed and started off in no particular direction, Rattrap scurrying to follow.
*****
They walked in silence for a while. The path was taking them closer to the Axalon, but not directly toward it; Rattrap guessed that neither of them wanted to run into the other Maximals just now. He wasn't sure where Dinobot was going, if anywhere, or how long he was planning to walk. Rattrap's beastmode wasn't built for long treks, but he didn't bother Dinobot with questions. He probably wouldn't have answered anyway. An almost tangible awkwardness had settled between them. Rattrap briefly considered leaving him and going back to the Axalon himself, to wait for the warrior to come back when he was ready, but quickly dismissed the idea. Dinobot was in no mental state for combat, and who knew if there were any other Predacons skulking around?
Eventually the trees thinned, and a cliffside loomed ahead. They kept going until they were in the shadow of the overhang, out of the forest completely; only thin grass grew around the base of the rock wall. Here Dinobot seemed to relax, ever so slightly. He found a niche behind a rocky protrusion that blocked the wind and the morning sun, and settled himself with his back to the cliffside. It was probably the most protected spot one could find out here -- impossible to be attacked from behind, and the ground ahead was open and visible enough to spot any approaching threat, while the rocks themselves afforded quite a bit of shelter. Even spotting them would be difficult here, as the brown-skinned raptor and gray-furred rat fit in rather well with the scenery.
Rattrap plunked himself down next to the warrior, with perhaps a foot of space between them. "You must come here a lot," he said. "Good tactical position."
Dinobot barely acknowledged him with a grunt. The spy sensed that he wanted to be left to his thoughts for a while, but frankly he wasn't sure that was a great idea, and besides, he wanted some answers. "Don't blame you for needin' to watch your back all the time. 'Specially not after what I just heard."
The raptor twitched -- almost flinched. "I'm not in the mood," he said slowly, "to talk about this right now."
"Course not. You didn't wanna talk about it before, neither. But it sorta came up anyway, so we'd better deal with it, 'cause otherwise it's just gonna follow us around an' bite us on the ass."
A low growl rumbled in Dinobot's throat. Rattrap's beast-mind shivered, but he held himself in place, outwardly unperturbed. "Look, if it's any consolation, I ain't really surprised. I figured you an' Megs had a history back when you first joined up. He always kinda talked to you like… well, like he knew you really well." So very well, yess. The fur on his back prickled slightly in memory. "An' you… heh. You had to have some reason for puttin' up with his slag for so long."
"That was not the only reason." Dinobot trained his eyes on the open terrain in front of them, as if not looking at Rattrap made it easier to speak. "At first it was as I told you. He recruited me to his cause. I was his most trusted subordinate."
"An' then?"
The raptor shrugged. "You heard Megatron. There's nothing more to tell."
"Chopperface, we both know Megatron lies like a power cord on the floor. I wanna hear the story from you."
There was no immediate answer, so after a moment he pressed on. "He was your first, wasn't he? Or was he lyin' about that?"
Scaly eyelids closed, almost as if in shame. "Regrettably, it's true. No one else had ever gotten close enough."
"So how'd he get that close?"
For a moment it seemed as if Dinobot wasn't going to answer. Then he opened his eyes and stared steadfastly at the horizon. "Predacons take what they want," he said. "I should have known, after he had given me so much, that he would demand something in return."
The fur prickled along Rattrap's shoulders, but he didn't speak. He had a feeling this wasn't a pleasant tale.
Dinobot sighed and continued. "It began with a look. I would catch it in his optics sometimes, when he thought I wasn't paying attention. He was usually careful with his expressions around me, but I had had many years to develop a suspicious mind. I'm not sure I can describe it… a look of hunger, greed. I never saw it directed at anything else, until the day we stole the Golden Disk." Rattrap shivered. He knew that look himself. "I knew he wanted something from me, but I assumed it had to do solely with my skills as a warrior. At the time I could think of no other possibility.
"Then… touch. Again, subtle at first, easy to overlook. A hand would brush my back or linger a little too long on my arm. It made me uneasy. I have never been fond of physical contact. But he did me no harm, and he was my commander, and my only friend. So I allowed it."
Rattrap ventured to ask, "Did you know what he was gettin' at? I mean, anyone ever tried that with you before?"
The raptor grunted. "None would have dared. No one touched me unless they wanted a fight. Perhaps there were verbal advances, but I never heeded them. It was nothing I was interested in."
"Maybe some o' those people you thought wanted a fight were really after somethin' else, though. Remember how you thought I was attackin' your face?"
Dinobot paused, a troubled look on his face. He hadn't considered that before. In light of what had happened, later, however… He quickly shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I had no need of such diversions, and no trust in those who offered them. I tried to convey this to Megatron once his intentions became clear."
Rattrap let out a low whistle. "I'll just bet he was thrilled to hear that."
The warrior curled his lips back from his teeth in memory. "He told me that my wishes were irrelevant. I was his. I challenged him to come and claim me, then. And that was my mistake."
"Why? Did he seriously expect you not to fight him?" Rattrap snorted. "He shoulda known better."
The raptor looked down at him sharply. "You don't understand. I issued a challenge. I gave Megatron a way to earn my submission. If he defeated me, I would have no choice but to acknowledge his victory."
"Y'mean… Oh. Oh, slag." Rattrap went silent for a long moment. "Did he?"
Dinobot looked away from him, toward the horizon. "Yes."
A chill breeze slithered out of nowhere into their retreat. Rattrap shivered violently and huddled closer to the tense, crouching raptor. "So then you let him…"
"I didn't let him win, I assure you. I knew what the consequence of losing would be." He shook his head. "I simply wasn't strong enough. And among Predacons, strength is everything. You lose what you cannot defend."
The spy stared up at him for a moment in horrified silence. Then he laid a paw against Dinobot's shoulder. "Slag, Chopperface, I'm sorry. If I'da known… I mean, he's a black-Sparked bastard an' a connivin' snake, but even I wouldn't've thought he'd do something like that to his own--"
Dinobot turned his head sharply to glare at the rodent. "Save your sympathy. I was no innocent victim. I made a foolish mistake, and I paid for it. I am not to be pitied for putting myself in that situation, do you understand?"
Rattrap blinked. "But… you just told me he…"
"Claimed what was his. He is not the first Predacon commander to do so. As a means of asserting authority and control, it is undeniably effective, I can attest to that." He grimaced slightly before he caught himself. "Unpleasant, but effective. In any case, it would not have happened if I had won the battle. Defeat carries a steep price."
Rattrap couldn't believe what he was hearing. "A steep price, huh? Assertin' authority? That's the Pred slang terminology for rape?"
That single word had all the impact of a five-megaton warhead. Dinobot's nostrils flared, his eyes narrowed, and he tensed so violently that Rattrap jumped back, expecting him to lash out. Instead the raptor stood, shook the dust from his scales, and took several agitated steps away before turning back, snarling at him. "What do you know about it? You can only judge us by your own moral standards. Our loyalty, our respect, can only be earned through displays of power! Megatron is a fool and a dishonorable villain, but even he understands that much!"
"I seem to recall Optimus earnin' your respect without throwin' you over a desk!" the spy snapped, too angry to hold back, and saw another missile strike its target, Dinobot physically recoiling from his words.
"Optimus defeated me in battle, in case you've forgotten!" the warrior retorted, recovering quickly.
"Glad you don't write the history books. Nobody won that fight, pal -- Megs called the game early. No, you decided to follow Optimus 'cause he saved your scaly tail on that bridge, without expectin' anything in return -- Megatron woulda never done nothin' like that for you in a million years!"
Dinobot didn't have a comeback for that. He glanced away, and Rattrap could almost hear his gears turning -- trying to come up with a rationalization, a defense, or even just an insult to throw the rat off his track. The spy didn't hesitate, but plowed on while he had the advantage. "Look, I don't care what you call it, you can't justify it. Not to me. What do I know about it? You really wanna know?" He drew himself up on his hind legs. "I'll tell you. I don't like bein' honest about myself, but it's the least you deserve in return."
The warrior still didn't look at him. "That isn't necessary, rodent."
"Shut up an' listen, Chopperface! Don't make me lose my nerve." Rattrap drew a deep breath, then began talking fast, not giving himself time to edit the tale. "There was this fembot I knew once, name o' Surge. She was a lot older'n me, but we hung out a lot when I was still gamma-stage. I had a lotta friends that were older'n me -- I thought it was cool, an' I liked learnin' stuff from 'em. 'Course, some o' the things I learned were of a questionable nature. I think they liked corruptin' me… but then I was pretty corruptible. Never really was what you'd call innocent."
"Imagine that."
Rattrap ignored the spiteful interruption. "So I was one o' them, or so I thought. An' Surge, she took a shine to me. Mind you, she'd been with just about everyone in the gang, so it weren't real surprisin' when she made a pass at me too. Still, she got sorta fond o' me, an' used to say, half-joking, that we were boyfriend an' girlfriend. The others always found that real funny. Thinkin' back, I guess they had a pretty good idea what was bound to happen."
He paused to gather his nerve, and this time Dinobot didn't say anything. "So my twelfth cycle rolled around, an' the gang took me out to celebrate my comin' of age. They took me to this bar I'd never been in -- some o' the roughest-lookin' local elements I'd ever seen together in one place. Surge bought me a drink. First one I'd ever had legally, though they'd shared some o' their high-grade with me before." Rattrap stared down at the dirt. "This was more'n just high-grade. Whatever they put in it took me on a trip I'll never forget. Felt like my CPU'd sprouted wings and was flyin' all over the place. I kinda lost control o' my limbs, an' my sensors… oh, boy. Color, sound, smell, none of it made any sense. Guess it would've been fun for most bots, least once they were used to it. The others took the stuff just for fun. But for me… well, my sensornet didn't handle it too well."
"I imagine not, from what I experienced of your sensors." Dinobot was looking at him now, but Rattrap didn't want to know what expression his face might hold. The spy kept his own gaze lowered.
"So anyway, I was trippin' big-time, somewhere between excitement an' sheer panic. Whole world looked different, an' I couldn't hardly move. Then Surge, she's leanin' real close to me… she says she's gonna give me a birthday present." One corner of his mouth twitched wryly. "Heh, nowadays if a nice-lookin' fembot drags me onto her lap, I usually got no objections. But just then it shook me up. Somethin' didn't feel right. Maybe it was the drugs makin' everythin' weird. Maybe it was Surge -- she always did come on a little strong. Maybe…" He sighed. "Maybe I just wasn't ready. I dunno. Anyway, jacked as I was, I knew I didn't like this, an' I started resistin'. Wasn't much of a coherent resistance, mind you -- I was pretty far gone by then. It was all I could do to mumble 'Stop' an' push away from her a little. Still, it shoulda got the message across."
"Did it?"
Dinobot's voice sounded closer, and Rattrap looked up to find the velociraptor's muzzle nearly brushing the top of his head. He sighed and dropped down to all fours, curling his tail around his body. "Y'know, for the longest time I tried to convince myself she didn't hear, or didn't understand me. But I know better. I can remember clear as day, her laughin' an' tellin' me, Just relax, it'll feel real good soon." He shuddered. "Worst part is, she was right. After a little while it did start to feel pretty good. Physically, anyway…"
He trailed off as Dinobot settled down beside him, long tail curling around both of them. The spy pressed himself into a warm, scaly flank without looking up. He supposed he'd told enough, but couldn't quite seem to bring himself to stop. "Everybody said I must've enjoyed it. So I decided they were right. No sense arguin' -- after all, I'd let her do it to me." There was a sharp intake of breath from the warrior, but he didn't say anything. "Surge said I was the easiest bot she'd ever been with, an' trust me, that was sayin' a lot. Everybody thought I was a real mech-whore after that." Rattrap shrugged. "So, that's what I became. I musta been the plaything for half o' Simfur over the next decade or so. Never said 'stop' again… I'd do whatever they wanted, be whatever they wanted. I even learned to like it."
He finally managed to check his babbling, realizing he might've said too much. Dinobot was silent -- an ominous sign. The spy drew back and huddled in on himself, unable to look up. "You got no idea what a used piece o' rat-tail you picked up. I ain't even worth sharpenin' your claws on. But the truth is, I mighta never turned out that way if-- I mean, can you imagine what it was like goin' through that the day I became a mech? Any chance I had o' developin' self-respect, bang! Gone. She might as well've rewired me into a pleasure-bot."
A three-clawed hand rested lightly on his back, and he finally fell silent as Dinobot's muzzle brushed his ear. "Such honesty takes courage," the warrior said quietly. "I respect that, despite what you say. I certainly don't think any less of you."
"Tch, that'd be quite an achievement."
Dinobot sighed, ruffling his fur. "Rattrap, I'm serious. I don't see how you can compare your situation to mine. You were not at fault."
The spy jerked his head up, finally. "Neither were you! Don't you get it? We were both used, Dinobot. I was drugged, you were forced, but it comes down to the same thing. We were both--"
"No," said the warrior firmly. "You were young, and incapacitated through trickery. You could not defend yourself. I had no such excuse."
"So it ain't my fault I was tricked, but it's somehow your fault that you tried to fight him off and lost?"
"I am a Predacon warrior!" Dinobot snapped. "I don't deserve anything I can't fight to keep. I had lost to him, and so I belonged to him. To the victor go the spoils -- THAT is our way!"
"Your way or Megatron's? 'Cause that sounds like his sorta reasoning. Matter o' fact, I don't even get why you're defendin' it. After what happened to you--"
"That is exactly why."
Rattrap wasn't sure he'd heard right. "Pardon?"
Once again Dinobot rose to his feet. He made no attempt to walk away this time, just stood staring off into the distance. "I had to believe it, vermin. If submitting to the victor in battle was a Predacon custom, then there was no shame in it. I had not lost my honor. If not…" The warrior lowered his head. "If not, then my honor had been taken from me. I could not live with being a victim. I would have thrown myself on my sword… I nearly did."
The spy stared at him in silence, and Dinobot turned to look down at him again. "You have little use for honor, vermin, and I doubt you have ever been burdened with an overabundance of pride. But for me, pride and honor were all I had left to cling to. Would you rather I had lost them? Because we would not be here talking then, I assure you of that."
Rattrap didn't answer. What could he possibly say to that? He knew what it was like to have to cling to delusions to keep his sanity. It wasn't something he could condemn in others.
After a moment of utterly depressing silence, the spy sighed and sat up. "You win. I ain't arguin' no more. Not like I'm in a position to talk." He rested a paw on a scaly shoulder. "I'm glad you got out when you did, though."
Dinobot nodded agreement. "I should have told you sooner. Had you known what you were getting into before we attempted to interface, you might not have been so badly injured."
"Attempted? I'd say we did a little more than that." Rattrap patted his shoulder. "Anyway, don't worry about it. After what you just told me, I ain't surprised you went at it like it was an act o' war. 'S what you're used to." He shrugged. "Sides, I wasn't exactly complainin' at the time."
The warrior growled. "I'm glad you enjoyed it, because it won't happen again. I gave Optimus my word."
Rattrap concealed a flash of disappointment. "That's too bad. I was gonna offer to show you how to have a good time without needin' a CR bath afterwards. I mean, I got plenty of experience to draw from. I bet we could make it work better the second time." He withdrew his paw. "Course, if you ain't interested… well, last thing I wanna do is push. Wouldn't blame you if you never wanted me in your berth again, to be honest. Totally your call."
What am I doing? Am I insane? This is no time to try an' score again, for Primus' sake! The guy just got through tellin' me 'bout Megatron takin' him by force!
On the other hand, countered another voice in Rattrap's CPU, ain't it about time somebody gave him somethin' better to remember?
Dinobot started to walk away, pulling him from his thoughts. "Hey, wait! Don't run off! I didn't mean--"
The raptor glanced over his shoulder. "Who's running off, rodent? I'm headed back to the Axalon. I assume you didn't plan on making a second attempt out here. Secluded though it is among these rocks, I'm sure the energon surges would present a problem."
It took a second for the rat to register what he was saying. Then he smiled, really smiled for the first time that day.
Together they left the shadow of the cliff, taking the least conspicuous possible route back to the base. They weren't about to be interrupted twice.
- - - - -
Dinobot spun to face the threat, tail raised, claws spread wide, bloody fangs bared. "Get out," he growled. He moved, ever so subtly, to place himself in front of Rattrap. The spy wondered if it was subconscious or deliberate.
'Preciate the sentiment, Lizard Lips, but it ain't necessary. Transforming, Rattrap drew his pistol and stepped out from behind the raptor to stand flank-to-flank with him. A few meters of brush and a small stream were all that separated them from the tyrant. "How long you been eavesdroppin', Grapeface? Don't tell me you got nothin' better to do."
Megatron looked amused. "Oh, I was here before you, vermin. Dinobot should have sensed my presence some time ago, but it seems he was… preoccupied."
The warrior started violently. It was possible, of course, that Megatron was lying. But if he was telling the truth, and he really had been lurking here the whole time… Dinobot did not like the implications.
"Your time among the Maximals has softened you, Dinobot. In more ways than one." Megatron's glance flicked from the warrior to the spy. "Your standards have fallen, as well. I never would have guessed that you would settle for so little."
The raptor's eyes narrowed, his fists clenching. Then he lifted his lip in a sneer. "Hm. If you mean the vile, wretched pestilence who should be standing behind me…" He shot Rattrap a quick glare. "I assure you, I've had much worse."
Megatron's tail lashed once, tightly, from side to side. He didn't seem to like what Dinobot was implying. But he quickly masked his displeasure with a smooth smile. "Such ingratitude. On second thought, vermin, I believe you two deserve each other. One mech's trash is another mech's treasure… and you do have a taste for garbage."
The spy checked his angry outburst and gave the Predacon leader his smarmiest smirk instead. "What can I say? It's amazin' what some mechs throw away."
Dinobot snarled. "Let me fight my own battles, rodent!" He transformed hastily and drew his sword, pushing Rattrap aside. "Why waste time talking, Megatron? If it's a rematch you want, I will gladly oblige!"
The tyrant chuckled. "Oh, not at all, not at all. Do you see my weapon drawn? Am I not still in beastmode, standing here at a respectable distance? I only wish to talk, Dinobot. Can't we have a civil conversation, for old times' sake?"
"As I recall," the warrior said darkly, "our former conversations were anything but civil." Nevertheless, he reluctantly sheathed his sword. Megatron had played on his sense of honor with a skill born of practice. Dinobot couldn't justify attacking an unarmed opponent, now that he'd been called out on it.
Rattrap groaned. "Ahh, don't tell me you're fallin' for that! Weapon drawn or no, he's a threat, an' I only got one response to threats." His finger tightened slowly on the trigger. A clawed hand wrapped around the barrel of the pistol and jerked it downward.
"He's not making threats, he's trying to provoke us. Primus knows what he has up his sleeve." Dinobot didn't take his optics off of Megatron as he spoke. "The best thing to do would be to walk away. He won't follow."
A big, spine-chilling grin curved the tyrannosaur's jaws. "Walk away? That doesn't sound like the Dinobot I knew. And I knew him so very well, yess." He licked his lips, noting the change in the warrior's expression, the sudden rigid tension of his body. "Why, there was a time I trusted him more than any of my followers. Did he tell you about that, vermin? He was my staunchest supporter… weren't you, my pet? Loyal to his Core."
Rattrap felt the fur bristling on his back at the way Megatron spoke about Dinobot -- spoke to him. It felt like something nasty had slithered through his circuits. I don't care what Chopperface says, I'm puttin' a round between that bastard's eyes if he don't shut the frag up in about two seconds.
"He told me everything, Scaleface. You really think I care? He may've been loyal to you once, but he's one of us now." He raised the pistol again, waving it threateningly while keeping the barrel pointed in Megatron's general direction. "I really suggest you let it go already. 'Cause this jealousy o' yours? Is gettin' to be a real pain."
Megatron looked incredulous for a second, then laughed. "Jealous? Oh, Rattrap. Why would I be jealous? After all…" He smirked at Dinobot. "I had him first."
Something inside the spy lurched to a halt, like he'd been punched in the gut. Rattrap glanced at the warrior, and from the murder in Dinobot's optics he guessed that Megatron was telling the truth for once. Images he'd forcibly suppressed for months poured into his processor. It wasn't a huge surprise. He'd suspected it for a long time, really, but it was one thing to suspect and another to hear it said in that slick, oily voice, a voice that made his beastflesh want to crawl right off of his frame. He couldn't stop a visible shudder of revulsion from rattling every joint in his body.
"Hmm?" Megatron cocked his head. "Well, well. It seems he didn't tell you everything after all."
It was Dinobot who responded, as Rattrap's wits seemed to have temporarily failed him. "Are you finished? If so, then remove yourself from our presence before I do something dishonorable." His entire body was quivering like a high-tension wire, and his claws flexed angrily at his sides.
"Oh, yes. We wouldn't want that, would we?" The tyrant retreated a step. "Very well. The two of you obviously have some things to work out, in any case. Best of luck with that, yes." He turned to leave… and then turned back for a final jab. "If you need advice, Dinobot, you know where to find me. Don't forget who taught you how to please a partner. From the look of those dents, I'd say you learned quite well."
Dinobot roared so suddenly that Rattrap jumped. His optics flashed green, and Megatron ducked with a reflex that spoke of practice. The destructive beam grazed his back and annihilated a young tree behind him, showering him with charred leaves and bark.
"Tempt not too much the hatred of my spirit, for I am sick when I do look on thee!" The warrior's voice was hoarse, and thick with an accent Rattrap couldn't place. He fired again, and again, knocking branches off of the trees above Megatron's head. He wasn't even aiming at the tyrant now -- just trying to bring half the forest down on top of him, apparently. The spot where Megatron had been standing was swiftly buried in foliage. The noise was deafening, and Rattrap covered his audio receptors, taking cover instinctively behind a tree while Dinobot expended his rage.
When the rending, crackling and splintering sounds finally ceased, the spy peeked cautiously out. Dinobot stood with his feet planted apart in a fighting stance, shoulders heaving, sword hanging heavily at his side. For dozens of yards in front of him the trees lay shattered and smoking, and there was no sign of Megatron. The warrior didn't seem to realize the danger had passed, however; his optics still had a wild light in them, blazing at something Rattrap couldn't see. The spy approached him cautiously, ready to beat a hasty retreat if need be.
"Dinobot?" The figure didn't waver. "Dinobot!" He was still staring intently into the trees. "Yo, Chopperface! We should get outta here."
The warrior's optics flickered. He shook his head quickly as if to clear it, then looked around. Finding no trace of Megatron, his gaze fell on Rattrap. "Yes. We… should leave." He spoke mechanically, his mind still distracted. Without another word he transformed and started off in no particular direction, Rattrap scurrying to follow.
*****
They walked in silence for a while. The path was taking them closer to the Axalon, but not directly toward it; Rattrap guessed that neither of them wanted to run into the other Maximals just now. He wasn't sure where Dinobot was going, if anywhere, or how long he was planning to walk. Rattrap's beastmode wasn't built for long treks, but he didn't bother Dinobot with questions. He probably wouldn't have answered anyway. An almost tangible awkwardness had settled between them. Rattrap briefly considered leaving him and going back to the Axalon himself, to wait for the warrior to come back when he was ready, but quickly dismissed the idea. Dinobot was in no mental state for combat, and who knew if there were any other Predacons skulking around?
Eventually the trees thinned, and a cliffside loomed ahead. They kept going until they were in the shadow of the overhang, out of the forest completely; only thin grass grew around the base of the rock wall. Here Dinobot seemed to relax, ever so slightly. He found a niche behind a rocky protrusion that blocked the wind and the morning sun, and settled himself with his back to the cliffside. It was probably the most protected spot one could find out here -- impossible to be attacked from behind, and the ground ahead was open and visible enough to spot any approaching threat, while the rocks themselves afforded quite a bit of shelter. Even spotting them would be difficult here, as the brown-skinned raptor and gray-furred rat fit in rather well with the scenery.
Rattrap plunked himself down next to the warrior, with perhaps a foot of space between them. "You must come here a lot," he said. "Good tactical position."
Dinobot barely acknowledged him with a grunt. The spy sensed that he wanted to be left to his thoughts for a while, but frankly he wasn't sure that was a great idea, and besides, he wanted some answers. "Don't blame you for needin' to watch your back all the time. 'Specially not after what I just heard."
The raptor twitched -- almost flinched. "I'm not in the mood," he said slowly, "to talk about this right now."
"Course not. You didn't wanna talk about it before, neither. But it sorta came up anyway, so we'd better deal with it, 'cause otherwise it's just gonna follow us around an' bite us on the ass."
A low growl rumbled in Dinobot's throat. Rattrap's beast-mind shivered, but he held himself in place, outwardly unperturbed. "Look, if it's any consolation, I ain't really surprised. I figured you an' Megs had a history back when you first joined up. He always kinda talked to you like… well, like he knew you really well." So very well, yess. The fur on his back prickled slightly in memory. "An' you… heh. You had to have some reason for puttin' up with his slag for so long."
"That was not the only reason." Dinobot trained his eyes on the open terrain in front of them, as if not looking at Rattrap made it easier to speak. "At first it was as I told you. He recruited me to his cause. I was his most trusted subordinate."
"An' then?"
The raptor shrugged. "You heard Megatron. There's nothing more to tell."
"Chopperface, we both know Megatron lies like a power cord on the floor. I wanna hear the story from you."
There was no immediate answer, so after a moment he pressed on. "He was your first, wasn't he? Or was he lyin' about that?"
Scaly eyelids closed, almost as if in shame. "Regrettably, it's true. No one else had ever gotten close enough."
"So how'd he get that close?"
For a moment it seemed as if Dinobot wasn't going to answer. Then he opened his eyes and stared steadfastly at the horizon. "Predacons take what they want," he said. "I should have known, after he had given me so much, that he would demand something in return."
The fur prickled along Rattrap's shoulders, but he didn't speak. He had a feeling this wasn't a pleasant tale.
Dinobot sighed and continued. "It began with a look. I would catch it in his optics sometimes, when he thought I wasn't paying attention. He was usually careful with his expressions around me, but I had had many years to develop a suspicious mind. I'm not sure I can describe it… a look of hunger, greed. I never saw it directed at anything else, until the day we stole the Golden Disk." Rattrap shivered. He knew that look himself. "I knew he wanted something from me, but I assumed it had to do solely with my skills as a warrior. At the time I could think of no other possibility.
"Then… touch. Again, subtle at first, easy to overlook. A hand would brush my back or linger a little too long on my arm. It made me uneasy. I have never been fond of physical contact. But he did me no harm, and he was my commander, and my only friend. So I allowed it."
Rattrap ventured to ask, "Did you know what he was gettin' at? I mean, anyone ever tried that with you before?"
The raptor grunted. "None would have dared. No one touched me unless they wanted a fight. Perhaps there were verbal advances, but I never heeded them. It was nothing I was interested in."
"Maybe some o' those people you thought wanted a fight were really after somethin' else, though. Remember how you thought I was attackin' your face?"
Dinobot paused, a troubled look on his face. He hadn't considered that before. In light of what had happened, later, however… He quickly shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I had no need of such diversions, and no trust in those who offered them. I tried to convey this to Megatron once his intentions became clear."
Rattrap let out a low whistle. "I'll just bet he was thrilled to hear that."
The warrior curled his lips back from his teeth in memory. "He told me that my wishes were irrelevant. I was his. I challenged him to come and claim me, then. And that was my mistake."
"Why? Did he seriously expect you not to fight him?" Rattrap snorted. "He shoulda known better."
The raptor looked down at him sharply. "You don't understand. I issued a challenge. I gave Megatron a way to earn my submission. If he defeated me, I would have no choice but to acknowledge his victory."
"Y'mean… Oh. Oh, slag." Rattrap went silent for a long moment. "Did he?"
Dinobot looked away from him, toward the horizon. "Yes."
A chill breeze slithered out of nowhere into their retreat. Rattrap shivered violently and huddled closer to the tense, crouching raptor. "So then you let him…"
"I didn't let him win, I assure you. I knew what the consequence of losing would be." He shook his head. "I simply wasn't strong enough. And among Predacons, strength is everything. You lose what you cannot defend."
The spy stared up at him for a moment in horrified silence. Then he laid a paw against Dinobot's shoulder. "Slag, Chopperface, I'm sorry. If I'da known… I mean, he's a black-Sparked bastard an' a connivin' snake, but even I wouldn't've thought he'd do something like that to his own--"
Dinobot turned his head sharply to glare at the rodent. "Save your sympathy. I was no innocent victim. I made a foolish mistake, and I paid for it. I am not to be pitied for putting myself in that situation, do you understand?"
Rattrap blinked. "But… you just told me he…"
"Claimed what was his. He is not the first Predacon commander to do so. As a means of asserting authority and control, it is undeniably effective, I can attest to that." He grimaced slightly before he caught himself. "Unpleasant, but effective. In any case, it would not have happened if I had won the battle. Defeat carries a steep price."
Rattrap couldn't believe what he was hearing. "A steep price, huh? Assertin' authority? That's the Pred slang terminology for rape?"
That single word had all the impact of a five-megaton warhead. Dinobot's nostrils flared, his eyes narrowed, and he tensed so violently that Rattrap jumped back, expecting him to lash out. Instead the raptor stood, shook the dust from his scales, and took several agitated steps away before turning back, snarling at him. "What do you know about it? You can only judge us by your own moral standards. Our loyalty, our respect, can only be earned through displays of power! Megatron is a fool and a dishonorable villain, but even he understands that much!"
"I seem to recall Optimus earnin' your respect without throwin' you over a desk!" the spy snapped, too angry to hold back, and saw another missile strike its target, Dinobot physically recoiling from his words.
"Optimus defeated me in battle, in case you've forgotten!" the warrior retorted, recovering quickly.
"Glad you don't write the history books. Nobody won that fight, pal -- Megs called the game early. No, you decided to follow Optimus 'cause he saved your scaly tail on that bridge, without expectin' anything in return -- Megatron woulda never done nothin' like that for you in a million years!"
Dinobot didn't have a comeback for that. He glanced away, and Rattrap could almost hear his gears turning -- trying to come up with a rationalization, a defense, or even just an insult to throw the rat off his track. The spy didn't hesitate, but plowed on while he had the advantage. "Look, I don't care what you call it, you can't justify it. Not to me. What do I know about it? You really wanna know?" He drew himself up on his hind legs. "I'll tell you. I don't like bein' honest about myself, but it's the least you deserve in return."
The warrior still didn't look at him. "That isn't necessary, rodent."
"Shut up an' listen, Chopperface! Don't make me lose my nerve." Rattrap drew a deep breath, then began talking fast, not giving himself time to edit the tale. "There was this fembot I knew once, name o' Surge. She was a lot older'n me, but we hung out a lot when I was still gamma-stage. I had a lotta friends that were older'n me -- I thought it was cool, an' I liked learnin' stuff from 'em. 'Course, some o' the things I learned were of a questionable nature. I think they liked corruptin' me… but then I was pretty corruptible. Never really was what you'd call innocent."
"Imagine that."
Rattrap ignored the spiteful interruption. "So I was one o' them, or so I thought. An' Surge, she took a shine to me. Mind you, she'd been with just about everyone in the gang, so it weren't real surprisin' when she made a pass at me too. Still, she got sorta fond o' me, an' used to say, half-joking, that we were boyfriend an' girlfriend. The others always found that real funny. Thinkin' back, I guess they had a pretty good idea what was bound to happen."
He paused to gather his nerve, and this time Dinobot didn't say anything. "So my twelfth cycle rolled around, an' the gang took me out to celebrate my comin' of age. They took me to this bar I'd never been in -- some o' the roughest-lookin' local elements I'd ever seen together in one place. Surge bought me a drink. First one I'd ever had legally, though they'd shared some o' their high-grade with me before." Rattrap stared down at the dirt. "This was more'n just high-grade. Whatever they put in it took me on a trip I'll never forget. Felt like my CPU'd sprouted wings and was flyin' all over the place. I kinda lost control o' my limbs, an' my sensors… oh, boy. Color, sound, smell, none of it made any sense. Guess it would've been fun for most bots, least once they were used to it. The others took the stuff just for fun. But for me… well, my sensornet didn't handle it too well."
"I imagine not, from what I experienced of your sensors." Dinobot was looking at him now, but Rattrap didn't want to know what expression his face might hold. The spy kept his own gaze lowered.
"So anyway, I was trippin' big-time, somewhere between excitement an' sheer panic. Whole world looked different, an' I couldn't hardly move. Then Surge, she's leanin' real close to me… she says she's gonna give me a birthday present." One corner of his mouth twitched wryly. "Heh, nowadays if a nice-lookin' fembot drags me onto her lap, I usually got no objections. But just then it shook me up. Somethin' didn't feel right. Maybe it was the drugs makin' everythin' weird. Maybe it was Surge -- she always did come on a little strong. Maybe…" He sighed. "Maybe I just wasn't ready. I dunno. Anyway, jacked as I was, I knew I didn't like this, an' I started resistin'. Wasn't much of a coherent resistance, mind you -- I was pretty far gone by then. It was all I could do to mumble 'Stop' an' push away from her a little. Still, it shoulda got the message across."
"Did it?"
Dinobot's voice sounded closer, and Rattrap looked up to find the velociraptor's muzzle nearly brushing the top of his head. He sighed and dropped down to all fours, curling his tail around his body. "Y'know, for the longest time I tried to convince myself she didn't hear, or didn't understand me. But I know better. I can remember clear as day, her laughin' an' tellin' me, Just relax, it'll feel real good soon." He shuddered. "Worst part is, she was right. After a little while it did start to feel pretty good. Physically, anyway…"
He trailed off as Dinobot settled down beside him, long tail curling around both of them. The spy pressed himself into a warm, scaly flank without looking up. He supposed he'd told enough, but couldn't quite seem to bring himself to stop. "Everybody said I must've enjoyed it. So I decided they were right. No sense arguin' -- after all, I'd let her do it to me." There was a sharp intake of breath from the warrior, but he didn't say anything. "Surge said I was the easiest bot she'd ever been with, an' trust me, that was sayin' a lot. Everybody thought I was a real mech-whore after that." Rattrap shrugged. "So, that's what I became. I musta been the plaything for half o' Simfur over the next decade or so. Never said 'stop' again… I'd do whatever they wanted, be whatever they wanted. I even learned to like it."
He finally managed to check his babbling, realizing he might've said too much. Dinobot was silent -- an ominous sign. The spy drew back and huddled in on himself, unable to look up. "You got no idea what a used piece o' rat-tail you picked up. I ain't even worth sharpenin' your claws on. But the truth is, I mighta never turned out that way if-- I mean, can you imagine what it was like goin' through that the day I became a mech? Any chance I had o' developin' self-respect, bang! Gone. She might as well've rewired me into a pleasure-bot."
A three-clawed hand rested lightly on his back, and he finally fell silent as Dinobot's muzzle brushed his ear. "Such honesty takes courage," the warrior said quietly. "I respect that, despite what you say. I certainly don't think any less of you."
"Tch, that'd be quite an achievement."
Dinobot sighed, ruffling his fur. "Rattrap, I'm serious. I don't see how you can compare your situation to mine. You were not at fault."
The spy jerked his head up, finally. "Neither were you! Don't you get it? We were both used, Dinobot. I was drugged, you were forced, but it comes down to the same thing. We were both--"
"No," said the warrior firmly. "You were young, and incapacitated through trickery. You could not defend yourself. I had no such excuse."
"So it ain't my fault I was tricked, but it's somehow your fault that you tried to fight him off and lost?"
"I am a Predacon warrior!" Dinobot snapped. "I don't deserve anything I can't fight to keep. I had lost to him, and so I belonged to him. To the victor go the spoils -- THAT is our way!"
"Your way or Megatron's? 'Cause that sounds like his sorta reasoning. Matter o' fact, I don't even get why you're defendin' it. After what happened to you--"
"That is exactly why."
Rattrap wasn't sure he'd heard right. "Pardon?"
Once again Dinobot rose to his feet. He made no attempt to walk away this time, just stood staring off into the distance. "I had to believe it, vermin. If submitting to the victor in battle was a Predacon custom, then there was no shame in it. I had not lost my honor. If not…" The warrior lowered his head. "If not, then my honor had been taken from me. I could not live with being a victim. I would have thrown myself on my sword… I nearly did."
The spy stared at him in silence, and Dinobot turned to look down at him again. "You have little use for honor, vermin, and I doubt you have ever been burdened with an overabundance of pride. But for me, pride and honor were all I had left to cling to. Would you rather I had lost them? Because we would not be here talking then, I assure you of that."
Rattrap didn't answer. What could he possibly say to that? He knew what it was like to have to cling to delusions to keep his sanity. It wasn't something he could condemn in others.
After a moment of utterly depressing silence, the spy sighed and sat up. "You win. I ain't arguin' no more. Not like I'm in a position to talk." He rested a paw on a scaly shoulder. "I'm glad you got out when you did, though."
Dinobot nodded agreement. "I should have told you sooner. Had you known what you were getting into before we attempted to interface, you might not have been so badly injured."
"Attempted? I'd say we did a little more than that." Rattrap patted his shoulder. "Anyway, don't worry about it. After what you just told me, I ain't surprised you went at it like it was an act o' war. 'S what you're used to." He shrugged. "Sides, I wasn't exactly complainin' at the time."
The warrior growled. "I'm glad you enjoyed it, because it won't happen again. I gave Optimus my word."
Rattrap concealed a flash of disappointment. "That's too bad. I was gonna offer to show you how to have a good time without needin' a CR bath afterwards. I mean, I got plenty of experience to draw from. I bet we could make it work better the second time." He withdrew his paw. "Course, if you ain't interested… well, last thing I wanna do is push. Wouldn't blame you if you never wanted me in your berth again, to be honest. Totally your call."
What am I doing? Am I insane? This is no time to try an' score again, for Primus' sake! The guy just got through tellin' me 'bout Megatron takin' him by force!
On the other hand, countered another voice in Rattrap's CPU, ain't it about time somebody gave him somethin' better to remember?
Dinobot started to walk away, pulling him from his thoughts. "Hey, wait! Don't run off! I didn't mean--"
The raptor glanced over his shoulder. "Who's running off, rodent? I'm headed back to the Axalon. I assume you didn't plan on making a second attempt out here. Secluded though it is among these rocks, I'm sure the energon surges would present a problem."
It took a second for the rat to register what he was saying. Then he smiled, really smiled for the first time that day.
Together they left the shadow of the cliff, taking the least conspicuous possible route back to the base. They weren't about to be interrupted twice.