Last night I was with friends at an Eat N Park, and a male friend made a statement that was against anti-gay bigotry. He then added, "I mean, I'm not gay, but
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Thank you so much for your thoughtful and thorough response!
You're right, it's definitely a minor thing, but I'm a firm believer in it being the little things that create the environment for the big things. Especially since it's the little things that often go unexamined because, as you say, it's really not so bad.
Again thanks for your response. It's giving me a bit more to think on and cleared a bit up for me too.
Hmm, I've noticed that too. Somebody (usually male*) expresses a positive sentiment towards homosexuality, but then immediately assures the listener that they are not gay. It does seem to have an undertone - if slight and probably subconscious - that they do not completely accept homosexuality, because the idea of being perceived as homosexual is so unsettling (or abhorrent) to them.
I've seen this too - but I've also seen the reactions of other heterosexual males when one of their number expresses an opinion that could be perceived as either pro-gay or one found in gay stereotypes (for example, a fondness for Broadway musicals). Guys are quick to jump on each other for perceived "gay" behavior, so your friend has probably internalized that "I'm not gay" auto-response to the point where not only does he not think about it before saying it, he doesn't perceive that there could be anything wrong with it.
Eerily I find myself agreeing with you. I find statements like that to show that while the person has rationally accepted something that viscerally they still abhor it. Its definitely a step and the world would be better if everyone could at least get to this level, but allowing it to stay at this level is bad, people need to be called on their unthought out gut instincts.
If a sarcastic statement was all you said to bring your disagreement to the fore, it could be very possible that those around you didn't pick up on your disdain. Not being their obviously, but from past experience you sometimes get drowned out enough that quick comments like that don't always get enough attention to realize what was being said.
Also, we need to hang out, I miss arguing...er...discussing stuff with you :)
The other day I was driving back home from dropping off Ruth at Penn State and as I was coming down W. road this car stopped to turn left. And I realized it was turning into your driveway and it was a pizza man :P I hope you had delicious pizza.
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You're right, it's definitely a minor thing, but I'm a firm believer in it being the little things that create the environment for the big things. Especially since it's the little things that often go unexamined because, as you say, it's really not so bad.
Again thanks for your response. It's giving me a bit more to think on and cleared a bit up for me too.
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I've seen this too - but I've also seen the reactions of other heterosexual males when one of their number expresses an opinion that could be perceived as either pro-gay or one found in gay stereotypes (for example, a fondness for Broadway musicals). Guys are quick to jump on each other for perceived "gay" behavior, so your friend has probably internalized that "I'm not gay" auto-response to the point where not only does he not think about it before saying it, he doesn't perceive that there could be anything wrong with it.
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If a sarcastic statement was all you said to bring your disagreement to the fore, it could be very possible that those around you didn't pick up on your disdain. Not being their obviously, but from past experience you sometimes get drowned out enough that quick comments like that don't always get enough attention to realize what was being said.
Also, we need to hang out, I miss arguing...er...discussing stuff with you :)
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The other day I was driving back home from dropping off Ruth at Penn State and as I was coming down W. road this car stopped to turn left. And I realized it was turning into your driveway and it was a pizza man :P I hope you had delicious pizza.
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(The ham was an accident and it was one stray piece of ham on an otherwise delicious pizza! ;_; )
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