Stone-Clad Girl on the Greyed out Rainbow

Sep 03, 2005 14:00

Stone-Clad Girl on the Greyed out Rainbow ( Read more... )

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Comments 4

ice_ukz_40 September 4 2005, 04:10:33 UTC
hmmm, i guess asking for opinions is too much. Something that took me months to write goes un-noticed...

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suchis_life September 4 2005, 13:52:24 UTC
i've been offline over my birthday and the weekend. i'm going to read it now i've seen it.

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suchis_life September 4 2005, 14:01:01 UTC
i really like the chorus and last verse paticularly, it's all very good. nice concept. well not nice but you know. some of the lines could have others inbetween to break up the rhyming, i try and do that.

this bit's really cool:
As she sits on the top of the clouds she's screaming
Why can't the stone hearts stop me bleeding
Living the life i could be leading
My stone cold surface is receding

i feel like i need a greyed out rainbow now.

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ice_ukz_40 September 4 2005, 14:32:39 UTC
i appreciate the comments :)
Hang on, i'll talk to you on msn instead, its easier

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