Hot Hair Frak

Sep 20, 2010 09:14

Originally written and posted at bsg_kink for the FailFrak Challenge.

Title: Hot Hair Frak
Author: icedteainthebag
Pairing: Laura/Bill
Rating: MA
Word Count: 31,595
Summary: Admrial Bill wants to frak Laura's hair.
Authors Notes: For bsg_kink's FailFrak Challenge. This is an intentional mess of a fic... somadanne, don't kill me.



HOT HAIR FRAK
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One time on New Caprica it seemed like every other day Bill visited Laura, which he did quite often. He has been down so many times--about one hundred twenty nine times in the past one hundred thirty-three days. Four days of which he did not come down because of a practical joke his best friend and XO Saul Tigh had pulled on him involving his boxer shorts and finely ground cayenne pepper, which Saul had comandeered from the Cooking School Ship, Deliciosa.

When Bill was layed up with the embarassing cayenne pepper problem, during which his normally standard-length but above-average girth-member had swollen to about twice its normal size--something he and Saul jokingly compared to a can of Red Taurus, and yes he had shown Saul his dick, but only in the name of good friends sharing something that was pretty cool and not in a gay way--during this time, all Bill could think about was his girlfriend, Laura Roslin the ex-President of the Twelve Colonies and now, SchoolTeacher of New Caprica. But more specially, all he could think about was her gorgeous, flowing, deep red silky locks of hair that cascaded over her shoulders and repeatedly got into his face when she was hovering over him, riding his striating cock. This happened often.

He missed Laura Roslin, but he missed her hair more. He missed the way it felt on his skin but didn't really miss the way it blocked his view of her as she worked her mouth over his length between his tight and toned thighs, sparse with hair.

But he loved that hair.

Her hair. Not his thigh hair.

And suddenly he realized with a twinge of mindblowing arousal deep within his groinal area that he wanted to love her hair.

He hoped she'd be okay with that.

Like, he knew that she was pretty into some kinky stuff back when she was working with Rich Adar but still.

Finally, many ice packs grudgingly administered by Doc Sherman "Jack" Cottle later, the little Admiral, as he jokingly called his dick (Little when it was limp of course but Big when it was bigger) had recovered fully and without unnecessary complications.

After ordering Helo to release an army of fire ants into Saul's underwear drawer, Bill got on the wireless in the CIC and called down to the surface of that godsforsaken mudball New Caprica, where he'd left his girlfriend to live the life of the commoner and hoped she avoided the many diseases and parasitic infestations that were rampant on that inhabitual planet. One of the things he liked about ex-President Laura Roslin was that she was clean.

"What's goin' on?" he asked into the wireless comm.

"Bill!" Laura Roslin exclaimed, her excitement evident in her voice. He could practically hear her smiling softly.

"That's right," he said, his voice smooth and not as gravely as normal.

"Where have you been?" She sounded just as sad as she did when she lost the election. She had sounded so sad then, and looked so sad when he not only told her she couldn't steal the election but also implied that she was dead inside and reminded her of the cancer lurking within her body, ready to kill her at any instant.

Bill felt his eyes well up with heavily restrained emotions and tears. "Saul put pepper in my pants."

"Well, Admiral," Laura purred, "You're lucky I like my meat spicy."

That was all Admiral William J. Adama needed to hear in order for him to get into his Raptor and jet right down to the surface as fast as he could, and when jetting wasn't fast enough, he FML-jumped one click from Laura's tent and too bad if he landed on Gaeta's tent, which he did.

"William!" he heard from inside Laura's tent. She knew the sound of his Raptor anywhere. It was the biggest Raptor after all.

"Oh Miss Rossssssliiiiiiiin," Bill called, grabbing some blossoming dandeylions to make a harried bouquet. "Your prince is here!"

Laura whipped open her flaps, spreading them wide. "Get in here, buster," she growled, dragging him in by the neck. She was an incourigible wild cat, a sly jungle beast, a wanton and sleek animal on the prowl, a cougary feline with an insatiable carniverous appetite. The lack of available razors on the planet only encouraged these wild metaphors rampantly trampling through Bill's mind.

Bill slowly and painstakingly undressed his beautiful goddess and praised all the Gods he suddenly believed in, because Laura made him believe in them, that he was lucky enough, despite his admittedly whethered appearance and emotional standofficeness, that Laura would consider him an acceptable mate.

Then he got naked.

"I'm so lucky," he gruffly stated, looking upon her body, limbs askew and chest heaving with anticipatory breaths.

"I know," she admitted.

It was then he noticed her hair, haplessly haphazard on her pillow, a mass of velvety love strands that made him grow harder upon his observation. He couldn't stop staring. He honestly tried. His eyes would not listen to his silent pleas to stop gawking at this woman he did not deserve.

"What is it Bill?" she asked. "What's troubling my boo?"

Bill was silent. He usually hard a hard time expressing these deeper things but this time he made a resolution. He was going to tell her how he felt. He was going to let her know what was truly in his heart, the depth of his deep feelings for her. He had never done this before with a woman but Laura Roslin was no woman.

"I want to frak your hair," he said.

He fluffed his hand through his own unruly name, though more grey than her ruddy one, and ran his tongue across his stache, remembering it was there, unfortunately.

"Oh, my Gods," she gasped.

"I'm sorry I'm such a moral degenerate," he said, lowering his chin to his barrel chest with the scar down it.

He felt shameful.

"No, Bill, no one has ever asked me to frak my hair before, not even President Adar, not even in the throws of the wildest, hottest passion with Sean Allison," she breathed breathlessly. "That's so hot."

"Who's Sean Allison?" he inquired, confused.

"Some guy," she answered. "Whatever. Yes, Bill, yes, of course you are so much better than him." She ran her hands through her hair, spreading it more across the pillow, and Bill was jealous for a split second. "So how do you suggest we do this hair frak, lover?"

"Well," Bill said pensively, "Maybe I should just lie next to your head and thrust into it."

"My head?" Laura laughed.

"No, your hair, mi preciosa," he grumbled.

She shivered, so close to orgasm at the thought of this extremely intimate experience. He knew that was why she was shivering. Meh, she could wait.

Bill positioned himself next to her head and his stiffened, engorged protrudance graced across her hair. It felt so good. It felt amazing. Soft and sweet. He grabbed fistfuls of it--there was so much he could have grabbed seven fistfuls if he had seven fists. Then he slid himself into his fists full of her hair and looked down at the most heavenly expression on Laura's face.

"Is it good?" he asked, concerned, but quickly losing all concern, unlike him.

"Of course it is," she moaned, "You're William Frakkin' Adama."

"Right on," he then answered, thrusting and groaning at this exquisite pleasure. He tried to think of words to describe it but couldn't think of any.

Her hair swirled, twirled and curled around his girthy rod as he thrust faster, encouraged by Laura's writhing and keening. He never thought he would ever frak somebody's hair. Laura Roslin made him do things he never thought he could or would. It was like she set him free as a bird, if there were still birds.

"Laura," he panted, "Laura, Laura Roslin, Oh Madam President, Oh, Miss Roslin."

He thrust hard and bumped against her cheek. It kinda hurt. She seethed. "Watch it, Gods, you're going to take an eye out with that thing."

"Sorry," he apologized, huffing as he was so close to the orgasm he felt stirring deeply within the warm depths of his deepest areas which so happened to be his ballsac. He had to cum, he just had to. His fingers tightened around her hair and she grunted when he grunted.

"Ouch!" she said angrily. "Bill, no hair pulling."

"But I'm..."

"I don't care."

These words uttered so softly upon his ears made him shudder with the expellation of his love fluid and he squeezed his eyes shut to feel fourteen jolts of pleasure down his spine and up his back to his neck and down his arms, it was just that good. The best ever. Better than the last one hundred twenty-nine times, that's for sure.

"Laura I would tell you that I love you but I'm not sure you want to hear it," Bill groaned as he fell, spent, across her body. "I fear your compartmentalizing. Open your heart."

"Bill, you're gonna have to speak up," she sighed. "You came in my ear and I don't have a q-tip."

"So tired and spent," he said. "I'll take care of you later."

He knew she would understand if he fell asleep, so he did, despite his cock being tangled in hair and sticky emissions on the side of Laura's gorgeous, beautiful well-rounded head.

He was so lucky she loved him so much and he knew it.

THE END

laura/bill, total crack, anne: beta everything

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