Comments | icehealer: "I like my movies like I like my women: wide... screen."

icehealer

"I like my movies like I like my women: wide... screen."

Nov 10, 2007 13:28

Some things really make a lot more sense in your head and the moment they manifest as verbal words you suddenly find yourself on the wrong end of a "come again?" discussion ( Read more... )

Comments 10

mixmaster_mo November 11 2007, 00:54:32 UTC

Please tell me you did NOT say that to a chick?

Here's a conversation I had with my friend (she's a lesbian) yesterday:

Becca-I'm going to this girl's house today
Me-So you've taken in a lover? Does she have her own place?
Becca-(laughing) Nah.
Me-Oooh. Somebody's making a trip to Daddy's House.

And because that sounded weird to me the first thing that popped into my head was....

And by "Daddy's House" I mean "her vagina"

And then I turned RED. Not because I said vagina, mind you. But because I somehow managed to make it sound like some incest lovin, backyard effing, Deliverance inspired family affair.

And everybody just laughed and laughed and laughed at me. Meanwhile, my armpits were itching and sweating. There's no recovery for that.

icehealer November 12 2007, 03:03:33 UTC

This is one of the greatest things I've ever heard in my life.

You're my heroine.

etherrant November 11 2007, 19:58:53 UTC

"I don't need you to teach my boyfriend how to poke me."

You can ask Maggie for the details on that one.

10minutes2far November 12 2007, 01:04:18 UTC

here's a random thing I said that people took seriously... "I like my men like I like my coffee... cold and a little bitter."

icehealer November 12 2007, 03:03:03 UTC

Wait... you were joking?

10minutes2far November 12 2007, 04:29:38 UTC

Well, no, but I wanted them to think I was. Something about not wanting to show off my extensive collection of designer emotional baggage to colleagues or something.

10minutes2far November 12 2007, 04:30:30 UTC

Oh, but I was joking about that being how I like my coffee.

Thread 6

halieee November 12 2007, 19:26:52 UTC

All the time, lately. Everything I say comes out wrong. Funny in my head, not so funny out loud. Mostly just bitter and/or confusing out loud. Like when I tried to comment on how it really is quite amazing that Jason Schwartzmann has made such a career, since most main actors are at least 6', and he's like, 5'5, but really I just came off insulting all men under 6'. Including my boyfriend.

I need to take a vow of silence.