Drunk
Genre: I don’t even know
Rating: PG15 [Language and suggestive themes]
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the storyline.
Length: One Shot
Warnings: This is a slightly pointless little story.
Forewords: It’s probably not a good idea to confess to your band-mate in public over the phone when you’re over two hours away from him, in a bar. Especially when you’re part of a famous, blossoming idol group but for now…
A smile spread across Kim Kibum’s lips as he laid his head on the cold table of the mostly unoccupied bar. He liked that feeling; cold. Or at least, he felt like he should get used to the feeling of coldness by now. He heard a glass being set in front of him, and so sat up straight. The place was nearly empty, and why wouldn’t it be when it was 2am in the morning? Old American music softly played in the background, adding to the ‘vintage’ feeling of the bar. Besides the music by artists like Elton John and Journey, the only other noise within the small building were from the two old men playing pool and the middle-aged man wiping down the long table of the bar with a scruffy towel that smelled like strong Pine-Sol. It took Key a long time to find this place, and since he found it he’s been visiting often. The bartender was always the same middle-aged man, who did know Kim Key of SHINee, but had the manners to leave him alone since Key was obviously bothered. Why else would he be in a small, unknown bar in the outskirts of Seoul?
Key would usually just slowly drink a large cup or two of beer, staying in the bar for over a few hours to just think, but this evening, he treated himself to a few small servings of stronger drinks. He drank his second serving of melon vodka in one shot and laid his head on the cold table again. He almost laughed at the strange feeling. His face was cold, but everything else was burning.
“Another one, ajusshi, please,” he said lazily, not exactly slurring his words just yet. The ajusshi served him another glass without a word, but his usually expressionless face looked the slightest bit displeased. By this time, Key knew all the stories of the regulars in this bar. There were the two insomniacs who played pool every single night, then there was only other man sitting at the bar, who just drank flavored coffee drinks while reading magazines, and finally there was the lady with messy hair who sat at a table near the windows and just blankly stared at nothing, never finishing the one glass of flavored alcohol she ordered every night. And then there was Kibum; the gay idol that had too many problems in his life. They all had a different story.
The insomniac men were close to one another because their stories were similar. The shorter man was a construction worker who couldn’t sleep, because he constantly worried about providing for his family. The taller, fuller-figured man was the day-janitor of a supermarket who couldn’t sleep because his only daughter was very ill and he and his wife constantly fought since neither of them make enough money to pay for the hospital bills. The man all the way on the other end of the long table of the bar that Key sat at was a kind old man who lived alone and always came around for some company. He and Kibum talked a few times. The old man’s wife had died and both of his kids had grown up and moved to the U.S. Lastly, there was the woman with the messy hair. Kibum didn’t know much about her, but he knew that she was heartbroken like he himself, since every action they made was similar. Sometimes she’d happily leave, drunk after finishing her alcoholic beverage, but more often, she’d be distraught, barely even getting through half of her drink. Key considered talking with her many times, but he’s sure it wouldn’t be a very terrific idea to share his own heartbreak which involved another man who just happened to be in the same famous idol group as him. He wanted to talk about it, but doing so is dangerous no matter how you put it.
It was only three more hours until his next schedule. He hasn’t slept in three days and the drive back was two and a half hours long. But Key was buzzed so he didn’t care.
Key almost fell asleep on the spot when his phone began to vibrate. The caller I.D read “Jjong” and Key sighed since Jonghyun was the last person he wanted to talk to right now. Key just really didn’t feel like having a conversation with the source of his problems; the man who was dating a beautiful actress for the publicity of their company. Key felt stupid for even caring about it so much; he was happy for Jonghyun somewhere deep, deep inside, kind of. Jonghyun was dating Shin Sekyung, the girl who loved SHINee and who Jonghyun has been lusting over for a year now. He got the girl of his dreams, and their company didn’t just allow it, which was already a rare occasion itself, the company pretty much handed her to Jonghyun on a golden platter. Key drank the glass of strong alcohol placed in front of him; its bitter taste matched the bitter chuckle that escaped his lips. His phone had stopped vibrating by now and Key didn’t know what got into him when he ordered three more glasses, promising that these were going to be his last. The amount of alcohol he was consuming couldn’t be healthy, but he was getting closer to the drunkenness he aimed for so he didn’t mind. Why’d he have to be such a strong drinker anyways? He just wanted to be numb for a while, so that he wouldn’t have to feel himself being torn apart once he had to face Jonghyun again for their next schedule.
Why did it even matter anyways? So what, if he and Jonghyun shared a kiss or two when nobody was looking? So what, if he and Jonghyun snuck out once in a while when they wanted some time alone? So what, if he and Jonghyun sometimes became intimate at the times when they felt lonely? So what, if they genuinely enjoyed spending time together? So what, if they loved each other? These things certainly didn’t mean that they were in love, and Jonghyun proved it many times by calling Key his best friend, and never once looking at him with the same amount of admiration as he had when he looked at his beautiful girlfriend. Should Key be blamed if he sometimes misunderstood Jonghyun’s actions? The slow, passionate kisses, the way that Jonghyun firmly held Kibum close and buried his face into the younger member’s neck after they finished a moment of intimacy, the way that Jonghyun always treated Key with such care as if Key himself weren’t a man but was instead a rare, precious, and fragile jewel. But Jonghyun is Jonghyun and he seems to treat everyone this way, minus the kisses and the sex. Jonghyun knew how to make everyone feel special. The kisses and cuddling was previously just Kibum’s and Jonghyun’s “thing” though, so it was painful having to accept that Sekyung will eventually or had already gotten this treatment from her new boyfriend. Key couldn’t be blamed for thinking that he and Jonghyun may have actually had something between them. But come to think of it, neither of them had ever said those three words. If Key had said it once, would things be different? Yeah, Jonghyun would have probably run away and never talked to him again; but that would have been better than Kibum suffering by himself for something that Jonghyun didn’t even know he was doing.
Key was in the middle of drinking his last glass when his phone began ringing again; “Jjong,” flashed on his screen. Kibum usually wouldn’t answer these calls for various reasons. First of all, he didn’t want to embarrass himself by telling Jonghyun why he wasn’t at the dorm. Secondly, he didn’t want to lie about why he wasn’t at the dorm. And lastly, he didn’t want to flat out insult the innocent Sekyung, which was something that he’d definitely do if provoked. Sekyung was nice, and pretty and most of all, she had nothing to do with the whole conflict between Key and Jonghyun since she doesn’t even know that Key her boyfriend used to fuck; she just didn’t deserve to be dragged into this situation. Not to mention that Key knows that he’d cause a commotion upon answering the phone call, and it wasn’t a very good idea to make such a fuss in public since he still didn’t know whether or not anybody in this bar were actually silently paying attention to him. (Paranoia is part of the price of fame.)
But Key was drunk as hell so being nice and reasonable just wasn’t an option right now. Key pushed the big green button to answer Jonghyun’s call.
“Hey,” He answered casually. Key was good at pretending he was sober.
“Key,” Jonghyun’s voice sounded both stressed and relieved through the receiver of Key’s Nexus, “Oh my…Key, where are you right now, don’t you know what time it is?”
“Yeah, my phone has a digital clock, for your information,”
“Key, where are you?” Jonghyun asked calmly.
“That’s a secret, this is my secret place. I’m happy here, I don’t-I don’t want you to go here,” Key blew his cover by uncharacteristically stuttering. Jonghyun sighed. He knew that his band mate was, drunk, but was confused since the lack of noise made it obvious that Key wasn’t in any club or bar in Seoul.
“Who are you with?”
“None of your damn business, that’s who. Anyways, go do something else and stop-stop calling me, alright? Go call Sekyung, maybe she wants to talk to you,”
“Sekyung? What does she have to do with anything? Key, seriously, where are you? I’m worried sick about you!”
“Don’t worry,” Key replied with a long, high pitched chuckle, “I’ve been doing this for at least two weeks now. I haven’t gotten hurt yet. I got here, I know my way back,”
“You’re drunk Key,”
“Your mother’s drunk, Jonghyun,” Key said, with wheezing laughter.
“Key,” Jonghyun became frustrated, “Kibum, please. Just tell me where you are, and I’ll come pick you up, hm?”
“Did you ever notice how long Sekyung’s nose is? It’s not fitting to her face,”
“What?”
“I don’t like her smile, too. Her teeth bug me, they really do,” Key was lying at this point. He was picking on every stupid thing because he couldn’t find a single flaw in the girl, “Her eyebrows are helllllla bushy too. And I think she’s getting kind of fat,”
“Key, shut up. Where are you?”
“Are you sure you want to know?”
“Yes, I do. What the fuck Key, it’s way too early in the morning to play these games,”
“What if, fuck you and your girlfriend, I think I might love you,” Key said before he could stop himself. He was horrified at the words that he just let slip but grew surprised when Jonghyun replied by laughing.
“You love me?” Jonghyun asked, amused. Key couldn’t believe Jonghyun’s insensitivity.
“Why are you laughing? Are you making fun of me?” Key slurred in anger.
“Key, please tell me where you are. You love me right? If you really loved me, you’d tell me where I can pick you up. Please?”
“No, fuck you,” Key replied.
“Do you really want to?”
“Shut your mouth, you cocky bastard,”
“Okay Key, let’s just talk then. What’s on your mind?”
“You are,” Key answered thoughtlessly, “And your girlfriend,”
“Oh? Why is that?”
“I already told you,”
“You love me?”
“Yes,” Key replied, dragging out the ‘S’. He was now resting his head in his palm and closing his eyes, “Fuck her. Why do you even like her so much?”
“Key, you already know this. The company wants publicity for both sides and allowing us to date will cause a scandal that will catch everyone’s attention,”
“But you like her,” Key stated.
“Yeah, well, she’s my girlfriend after all,”
“Whatever. Have you guys fucked yet?”
“No, Key, what’s wrong with you, we haven’t even dated that long yet,”
“Exactly. We never dated Jonghyun, but in any case you could never resist me could you? I know when you guys get to that point in your relationship; I’ll be the one you’ll be thinking of. You know that I know you better than anybody else does. I know the way your body works better than she ever will, too,”
“Key, where are you? Seriously? Who is around you? Are you seriously just going to talk about is with me in public?”
“Why the fuck not?” Key laughed.
“Key-”
“All you have to do is admit it, Jonghyun. What are you trying to hide? I’m right aren’t I?”
“Kibum,” Jonghyun was exasperated, “I promise we can talk about this once you get home, just please tell me-”
“I’m just saying, you can do better,” And with that, Key hit end. Key sighed and laid his head down. He knew he’d regret everything he said in the morning and that he’ll have to make up some excuse as to why he was saying all these things. He’d probably have to say something along the lines of, “I was drunk and lonely and jealous that you were allowed to date.” But for now, Key’s head was pounding and he couldn’t find a single fuck to give. So he laid his head down again on the cold surface of the table again and dozed off for a few minutes. In the background, an American song that was a bit more modern began to play.
“But I’ve been drinking so much
That I’ma call him anyway and say
Fuck that new girl that you like so bad
She’s not crazy like me, I bet you like that
I said fuck that new girl that’s been in your bed
And when you’re in her I know I’m in your head
I’m just saying you can't do better
Always turned you out every time we were together
Once you had the best boy you can’t do better
Baby I’m the best so you can’t do better”
Key smirked, half asleep.
Baby, I’m the best so you can’t do better.
Sequel: Sober
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A/N: Hey gais. I'm currently suffering writer's block on Higher Society (BUT I WILL FINISH IT, I PROMISE), so I present you with a random little story inspired by CL's cover of "Marvin's Room" By Jojo/Drake. Sorry I suck. Baiii.