All I can say is that I didn't think that I could do this again to myself. Except I realize now, that particular case was so much different. I was trying so hard to please and gradual let myself into their lives in a different way. I felt that I could love them but it just didn't work. They treated me like a child. I realized I would always be a ( Read more... )

I wish I didn't have to be quiet. I wish I could say everything I need to when I need to say it. Oh fear. That's silly.

It's almost two and I cannot fall asleep. I wasn't even tired yesterday at 3 in the morning. I waited until 4 to fall asleep. It's cold in here and outside but more so out there. I've been listening to Miss Spektor lately. Her songs are so great and get me thinking about stuff. Like her songs fidelity, better, samson, on the radio, and field below ( Read more... )

Each player of this game starts off with 10 weird things/habits about yourself. People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 10 weird habits/things as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you need to choose about 6 people to be tagged and list their names ( Read more... )

***A song called Fidelity ( Read more... )

I had the best weekend. It was liberating. I did something totally for me and not anyone else. I was selfish and I enjoyed every moment of it. I really did. I felt like this was my fall break. I was upset because I felt like I had been robbed of my real fall break. Not because of the work I did...no I GLADLY did that. Let me repeat, GLADLY!!!! ( Read more... )

HA HA!!! I will not apologize for who I am. I love me...for the first time in a very long time I can say that I love myself. I might not love other people *giggles to myself* but it's okay they don't love me either. As long as I can look at myself and say, "YOU ROCK!! I LOVE YOU!" I really don't mind if other people don't care about me. I mean it's ( Read more... )

Oooooh my goodness! So handsome....I WANT! I think he caught me staring at him ha ha! I'm so not smooth. Meh. *shrugs*

On another note...I love working with Sidney she's awesome, today was so much fun! WEE!

Sometimes I miss this person. Then sometimes I wish I had never met them and that they would get out of my life forever. I don't know what that means. But I always have the urge to tell them a truth I'm afraid of.

Yes I have not written in this journal for a long time. I actually have the old school leather journal with actual paper in it! *Gasp* Ha ha. So I've been writing my random thoughts in that. But I felt like writing in this one today. I've been feeling odd lately. I wish I could better explain these things. My former self is itching to break free... ( Read more... )