spun pink glass: very nice joe sky scorched red: if you have a comment, you should leave one spun pink glass: the "i pick it up. roll it around in my hands." is a little cliche spun pink glass: but overall i like it a lot spun pink glass: yea the sentences are a little almost... broken. i dont know they kind of start & stop abruptly, i think there should be more commas? but i dont know much about writing. sky scorched red: well i meant comment on LJ, but yea sky scorched red: i wanted it to be like that spun pink glass: okay sky scorched red: thats kind of the point spun pink glass: well then you succeeded spun pink glass: i mean it goes with the feeling of the piece spun pink glass: i just didnt know if thats what you wanted
Comments 5
sky scorched red: if you have a comment, you should leave one
spun pink glass: the "i pick it up. roll it around in my hands." is a little cliche
spun pink glass: but overall i like it a lot
spun pink glass: yea the sentences are a little almost... broken. i dont know they kind of start & stop abruptly, i think there should be more commas? but i dont know much about writing.
sky scorched red: well i meant comment on LJ, but yea
sky scorched red: i wanted it to be like that
spun pink glass: okay
sky scorched red: thats kind of the point
spun pink glass: well then you succeeded
spun pink glass: i mean it goes with the feeling of the piece
spun pink glass: i just didnt know if thats what you wanted
<3
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