APPLICATION
OOC Information:
Name: Kit
Age: 23
AIM: joyful poison
MSN: N/A
Y!M: N/A
E-MAIL: madscientific@gmail.com
IC Information:
Name: Spades Slick
Fandom: Homestuck
Timeline: Near the end of the Intermission, after he sort of fucks up time and tries prying Lord English's safe open with Crowbar's crowbar.
Age: N/A and not important. He's centuries old at the very least and apparently doesn't age over time, so.
Appearance: Normal Dersite: actually pretty short (sprite-wise, he is about as tall as 13-year-old human kids and 6-year-old troll), pitch-black carapace, incredibly sharp teeth, pure white eyes that are always narrowed and seem to be glaring ALL THE TIME, and some sort of constant default scowl. He wears an equally pitch-black trenchcoat, (plain and serviceable) fedora, and shoes, and presumably shirt and pants as well. He has a white barcode on his left (right-left?) wrist, that seems to be useful for getting deep into a universe-ending demon's vault. He recently got one eye stabbed out by Snowman (his left-right eye!) and patched up (reluctantly) by Stitch, so he has a scar there.
Here is a reference picture.
Abilities: Spades Slick is the leader of the Midnight Crew, and like all the other members, he may or may not have some powerful "shadow-based magic" that only ever showed up in a non-canon AU of an entirely different MSPA comic, but that's okay because outside of making some kingpin a member of the Midnight Crew in said non-canon AU he never actually uses it anyway. Instead, he prefers to use bladed weapons. Occasionally guns, but mostly bladed weapons of any kind, which he has a lot of skill with, to the point of being able to behead three people with one swing of his Rapier Wit. Despite his skill with blades, his weapon of choice seems to be a Cast Iron Horse Hitcher that he uses to beat people's heads in manually, and occasionally chooses to ride around like a mechanical horse. Hitcher.
Through his hammerspace inventory, he can access a deck of cards that also happens to be a War Chest, or maybe a War Chest that also happens to be a deck of cards, because it has that incredibly stupid object duality glitch. All of his weapons are (or were) specific cards in his deck. He also currently has Snowman's Cigarette Holder/Lance, which has the same object duality and so will presumably be stuck as a cigarette holder forever, and Crowbar's crowbar, which doesn't, and so which will probably just be gone.
Uniquely, Slick also has the ability to flip his sprite, changing what damage is on which side of his body; for example, if he does this, his right eye (or left-right eye) will "stop" being scarred, and his left eye (or right-left eye) will be scarred instead. It's like those old video-game characters where they just flip images instead of having multiple sprites. Exactly like that, in fact.
And, again like the rest of his crew, Slick is a pretty awesome jazz pianist. He can apparently use this as an attack against his enemies, to Fill'em With Midnight, playing the piano epically enough that it's able to be ridden like a mechanical bull, though I doubt he wants you to.
Personality: What most people would probably notice first and foremost is that Spades has a temper that's even shorter than himself, which when triggered sends him into a deep rage in which he quickly turns to his "unnecessarily elaborate assortment of fancy blades" (and Horse Hitcher), and this is definitely true. He is, according to Karkat (who would probably know by the time he says this), the kind of person who stabs you as a form of "hello."
But he is also very straightforward, as black and white as his character design (though, as with his character design, probably quite a bit more black). He's impulsive and while he can plan heists and vendettas and various criminal activities, he tends to act without forethought and solve any problems that crop up as a result without hesitation or much more forethought. Mixed with the fact that he seems to want to play around with anything he gets his hand on, including enemies (despite knowing what they do and what bullshit will result, he both stabs Sawbuck and messes with Die's voodoo doll, both of which send him hopping through timelines for a while before he manages to get himself back), he still somehow manages to get himself out of trouble with his impulsive planning just as often as into it. He also apparently has enough determination to build an entire city out of desert, so there's that; as well, he has some sort of idea of fair play and honor to him, at least in certain situations, and can occasionally be "reassuring" as long as your definition of reassuring includes him slapping the shit out of you to get you to stop being a blubbering pansy.
He tends to be surly, vulgar, and violent, albeit fairly quiet when not fighting; he tends to stab things or just not get involved with them. Despite this, he seems really concerned with how other people see him and even his crew, trying to utter cold-blooded one-liners during fights (and failing horribly at them, though that doesn't seem to bother him too much in the end), getting disgusted when Snowman catches him doing something embarrassing (and throwing his hat down in said disgust), and berating Boxcars for leaving his smut out in the open where anyone can see it while internally reassuring himself (and the audience) that no one will EVER see his, and even if anyone does, they totally can't prove its his. Even being conscious about how other people see him won't keep him from being a complete dork, though; against all probable expectations, Slick has an apparent habit of playing make-believe at entirely inappropriate times, both sitting in his War Chest and pretending it's an awesome car and pretending to ride around on his Cast Iron Horse Hitcher and joust with Snowman's Lance. Though as mentioned he still doesn't like getting caught at that shit.
Like the rest of his crew, Slick has a fondness for candy, particularly licorice Scottie dogs, two of which he keeps in his hat and is very protective of. And speaking of Scottie dogs, his smut is a copy of Terrier Fancy, which he will never admit to owning. Really.
History: Centuries in the past, Spades Slick was Jack Noir in the Alternia (aka "the troll kids'") session of Sgrub. He was Archagent second only to the Dersite Black Queen, and, of course, hated her with every fiber of his being. Eventually, he joined forces with the troll kids to help them and also most importantly carry out Operation: Regisurp. They managed to dethrone the Queen and exile her, but due to time travel bullshit the Future Black Queen (aka Snowman) used at least one of the troll kids to keep Jack from getting his hands on the extremely powerful Queen's ring and have him and his Agents exiled as well.
When Jack found his Agents again in the desert wasteland that was once Alternia, he apparently decided that posing sticking together as a team was more important than not. He, or they, single-handedly rebuilt civilization, including a 1920's film noir-looking city, despite there being nothing around but desert and some crappy ruins; at some point they formed the Midnight Crew, a soon-to-be notorious band of scofflaws who would proceed to be the major source of crime in the city they'd built.
At some point, and it will be pretty obvious that it probably doesn't even matter what point, the Midnight Crew made bitter enemies with a rival gang called the Felt -- including the former Black Queen, a now functionally immortal being (seeing as how if you kill her, you end the universe) called Snowman -- who had the ability to manipulate time in assorted assholish ways and apparently decided to use this skill to fuck around with the Midnight Crew. After they knocked over one of the crew's favorite casinos, Slick decided it was time to get revenge by a)breaking into the vault belonging to Lord English, the Felt's boss (the business end of things), and b)killing all of the green bastards brutally (which would only be their pleasure).
The four Midnight Crew members split up to take care of things, and a ridiculous amount of time travel proceeded to result. After playing pretend in his war chest for a few minutes, Slick proceeded to kill the shit out of everyone he ran into, including alternate universe versions of several of the Felt and a whole lot of clocks. He managed to catch the super-fast Itchy by tripping him (ie, just holding out one leg until Itchy tripped over it himself) and summarily beating his head in, and helped Die live up to his name by slitting his throat. Swiping Die's voodoo doll and messing around with it sent him into a timeline where the Felt's former apparently-acting-leader was still alive and the group was actually fairly competent for once, and proceeded to get into a gunfight that only ground to a halt when Snowman sauntered in and stabbed his eye out with her cigarette holder, apparently for kicks. After killing alternate Stitch (which, to his aggravation, didn't count as actually killing Stitch), he proceeded to travel through time some more via stabbing Sawbuck repeatedly, each blow sending them hopping off elsewhere; he managed to run into himself twice, the first time as an exile (who thought he was a ruffian but approved of his plain and serviceable black hat) and the second time right after killing Die, where both Slicks discussed potential time-based puns.
Eventually he wound up back around the right time, dispatched alternate timeline Crowbar, alternate timeline Sawbuck, and real Sawbuck in one fell but not exceptionally witty swoop of his Rapier Wit, and contacted Droog in order to get his eye fixed up by the real, not-dead Stitch (who had been captured). He then proceeded to make his way down to the vaults, where Boxcars was having trouble with several dozen copies of the moronic Eggs and Biscuits; by the time he got there Boxcars, Deuce, and Droog had all managed to get caught in the ever-expanding crowd, so he burst in jousting, killing Stitch and putting an end to Eggs and Biscuits' unstable time loop shenanigans by whacking at Eggs' time-abusing egg timer with Crowbar's crowbar, thereby nullifying it. Boxcars ate Eggs' head and Deuce blew up Biscuits, and then there was just the problem of the vault.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, one of the last surviving Felt, Clover, popped up about then, and they tried to get some goddamn information out of him, only being met by puns and annoying music in return. Then Cans burst through the wall like the Kool-Aid man and punched Droog into next week, and Boxcars into an entirely different calendar year, and Slick decided that the Intermission was just getting ridiculous and he was just gonna pry open the safe with Crowbar's crowbar. This may or may not have broken time a little bit, but hell, it's not like Slick will know that; it's at this point that he promptly found himself standing in the Facility.
Name: Kit
Age: 23
AIM: joyful poison
MSN: N/A
Y!M: N/A
E-MAIL: madscientific@gmail.com
IC Information:
Name: Spades Slick
Fandom: Homestuck
Timeline: Near the end of the Intermission, after he sort of fucks up time and tries prying Lord English's safe open with Crowbar's crowbar.
Age: N/A and not important. He's centuries old at the very least and apparently doesn't age over time, so.
Appearance: Normal Dersite: actually pretty short (sprite-wise, he is about as tall as 13-year-old human kids and 6-year-old troll), pitch-black carapace, incredibly sharp teeth, pure white eyes that are always narrowed and seem to be glaring ALL THE TIME, and some sort of constant default scowl. He wears an equally pitch-black trenchcoat, (plain and serviceable) fedora, and shoes, and presumably shirt and pants as well. He has a white barcode on his left (right-left?) wrist, that seems to be useful for getting deep into a universe-ending demon's vault. He recently got one eye stabbed out by Snowman (his left-right eye!) and patched up (reluctantly) by Stitch, so he has a scar there.
Here is a reference picture.
Abilities: Spades Slick is the leader of the Midnight Crew, and like all the other members, he may or may not have some powerful "shadow-based magic" that only ever showed up in a non-canon AU of an entirely different MSPA comic, but that's okay because outside of making some kingpin a member of the Midnight Crew in said non-canon AU he never actually uses it anyway. Instead, he prefers to use bladed weapons. Occasionally guns, but mostly bladed weapons of any kind, which he has a lot of skill with, to the point of being able to behead three people with one swing of his Rapier Wit. Despite his skill with blades, his weapon of choice seems to be a Cast Iron Horse Hitcher that he uses to beat people's heads in manually, and occasionally chooses to ride around like a mechanical horse. Hitcher.
Through his hammerspace inventory, he can access a deck of cards that also happens to be a War Chest, or maybe a War Chest that also happens to be a deck of cards, because it has that incredibly stupid object duality glitch. All of his weapons are (or were) specific cards in his deck. He also currently has Snowman's Cigarette Holder/Lance, which has the same object duality and so will presumably be stuck as a cigarette holder forever, and Crowbar's crowbar, which doesn't, and so which will probably just be gone.
Uniquely, Slick also has the ability to flip his sprite, changing what damage is on which side of his body; for example, if he does this, his right eye (or left-right eye) will "stop" being scarred, and his left eye (or right-left eye) will be scarred instead. It's like those old video-game characters where they just flip images instead of having multiple sprites. Exactly like that, in fact.
And, again like the rest of his crew, Slick is a pretty awesome jazz pianist. He can apparently use this as an attack against his enemies, to Fill'em With Midnight, playing the piano epically enough that it's able to be ridden like a mechanical bull, though I doubt he wants you to.
Personality: What most people would probably notice first and foremost is that Spades has a temper that's even shorter than himself, which when triggered sends him into a deep rage in which he quickly turns to his "unnecessarily elaborate assortment of fancy blades" (and Horse Hitcher), and this is definitely true. He is, according to Karkat (who would probably know by the time he says this), the kind of person who stabs you as a form of "hello."
But he is also very straightforward, as black and white as his character design (though, as with his character design, probably quite a bit more black). He's impulsive and while he can plan heists and vendettas and various criminal activities, he tends to act without forethought and solve any problems that crop up as a result without hesitation or much more forethought. Mixed with the fact that he seems to want to play around with anything he gets his hand on, including enemies (despite knowing what they do and what bullshit will result, he both stabs Sawbuck and messes with Die's voodoo doll, both of which send him hopping through timelines for a while before he manages to get himself back), he still somehow manages to get himself out of trouble with his impulsive planning just as often as into it. He also apparently has enough determination to build an entire city out of desert, so there's that; as well, he has some sort of idea of fair play and honor to him, at least in certain situations, and can occasionally be "reassuring" as long as your definition of reassuring includes him slapping the shit out of you to get you to stop being a blubbering pansy.
He tends to be surly, vulgar, and violent, albeit fairly quiet when not fighting; he tends to stab things or just not get involved with them. Despite this, he seems really concerned with how other people see him and even his crew, trying to utter cold-blooded one-liners during fights (and failing horribly at them, though that doesn't seem to bother him too much in the end), getting disgusted when Snowman catches him doing something embarrassing (and throwing his hat down in said disgust), and berating Boxcars for leaving his smut out in the open where anyone can see it while internally reassuring himself (and the audience) that no one will EVER see his, and even if anyone does, they totally can't prove its his. Even being conscious about how other people see him won't keep him from being a complete dork, though; against all probable expectations, Slick has an apparent habit of playing make-believe at entirely inappropriate times, both sitting in his War Chest and pretending it's an awesome car and pretending to ride around on his Cast Iron Horse Hitcher and joust with Snowman's Lance. Though as mentioned he still doesn't like getting caught at that shit.
Like the rest of his crew, Slick has a fondness for candy, particularly licorice Scottie dogs, two of which he keeps in his hat and is very protective of. And speaking of Scottie dogs, his smut is a copy of Terrier Fancy, which he will never admit to owning. Really.
History: Centuries in the past, Spades Slick was Jack Noir in the Alternia (aka "the troll kids'") session of Sgrub. He was Archagent second only to the Dersite Black Queen, and, of course, hated her with every fiber of his being. Eventually, he joined forces with the troll kids to help them and also most importantly carry out Operation: Regisurp. They managed to dethrone the Queen and exile her, but due to time travel bullshit the Future Black Queen (aka Snowman) used at least one of the troll kids to keep Jack from getting his hands on the extremely powerful Queen's ring and have him and his Agents exiled as well.
When Jack found his Agents again in the desert wasteland that was once Alternia, he apparently decided that posing sticking together as a team was more important than not. He, or they, single-handedly rebuilt civilization, including a 1920's film noir-looking city, despite there being nothing around but desert and some crappy ruins; at some point they formed the Midnight Crew, a soon-to-be notorious band of scofflaws who would proceed to be the major source of crime in the city they'd built.
At some point, and it will be pretty obvious that it probably doesn't even matter what point, the Midnight Crew made bitter enemies with a rival gang called the Felt -- including the former Black Queen, a now functionally immortal being (seeing as how if you kill her, you end the universe) called Snowman -- who had the ability to manipulate time in assorted assholish ways and apparently decided to use this skill to fuck around with the Midnight Crew. After they knocked over one of the crew's favorite casinos, Slick decided it was time to get revenge by a)breaking into the vault belonging to Lord English, the Felt's boss (the business end of things), and b)killing all of the green bastards brutally (which would only be their pleasure).
The four Midnight Crew members split up to take care of things, and a ridiculous amount of time travel proceeded to result. After playing pretend in his war chest for a few minutes, Slick proceeded to kill the shit out of everyone he ran into, including alternate universe versions of several of the Felt and a whole lot of clocks. He managed to catch the super-fast Itchy by tripping him (ie, just holding out one leg until Itchy tripped over it himself) and summarily beating his head in, and helped Die live up to his name by slitting his throat. Swiping Die's voodoo doll and messing around with it sent him into a timeline where the Felt's former apparently-acting-leader was still alive and the group was actually fairly competent for once, and proceeded to get into a gunfight that only ground to a halt when Snowman sauntered in and stabbed his eye out with her cigarette holder, apparently for kicks. After killing alternate Stitch (which, to his aggravation, didn't count as actually killing Stitch), he proceeded to travel through time some more via stabbing Sawbuck repeatedly, each blow sending them hopping off elsewhere; he managed to run into himself twice, the first time as an exile (who thought he was a ruffian but approved of his plain and serviceable black hat) and the second time right after killing Die, where both Slicks discussed potential time-based puns.
Eventually he wound up back around the right time, dispatched alternate timeline Crowbar, alternate timeline Sawbuck, and real Sawbuck in one fell but not exceptionally witty swoop of his Rapier Wit, and contacted Droog in order to get his eye fixed up by the real, not-dead Stitch (who had been captured). He then proceeded to make his way down to the vaults, where Boxcars was having trouble with several dozen copies of the moronic Eggs and Biscuits; by the time he got there Boxcars, Deuce, and Droog had all managed to get caught in the ever-expanding crowd, so he burst in jousting, killing Stitch and putting an end to Eggs and Biscuits' unstable time loop shenanigans by whacking at Eggs' time-abusing egg timer with Crowbar's crowbar, thereby nullifying it. Boxcars ate Eggs' head and Deuce blew up Biscuits, and then there was just the problem of the vault.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, one of the last surviving Felt, Clover, popped up about then, and they tried to get some goddamn information out of him, only being met by puns and annoying music in return. Then Cans burst through the wall like the Kool-Aid man and punched Droog into next week, and Boxcars into an entirely different calendar year, and Slick decided that the Intermission was just getting ridiculous and he was just gonna pry open the safe with Crowbar's crowbar. This may or may not have broken time a little bit, but hell, it's not like Slick will know that; it's at this point that he promptly found himself standing in the Facility.