Dormez vous?

[if_she_hollers]

So I, like, hid in the basement when like, that Korean death plague was going around and I think I, like, fell asleep.  It was like, a really good nap, but I think it might've been on the long side since I guess, like, two weeks have passed.  It's like, totally hard to keep track of time when you're in the dark all the time and sleeping, but I

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[xerxesalchemist]

[Old? I'm younger than you are.

And he's staring at her. From right behind her. As she's talking on the phone. Yeah. Just standing there.]

[if_she_hollers]

And like, if you don't stop staring at me when I'm on the phone, I'm going to like, pretend not to see you when I turn around and elbow you in like, the face totally by accident.

[xerxesalchemist]

's there a reason you're trying to talk to me on that thing?

[He doesn't move. He's far enough away from her that she wouldn't be able to "accidently" hit him if she tried. It's one of those long distance stares.]

[if_she_hollers]

I like, totally thought you were out getting murdered by a vampire.

[She finally puts the phone down and turns around with her well-practiced vacant stare fixed in place.]

So like, welcome to the family. I'm like, Ini Miney, and like, the boy is named, umm. Hurricane. There's another kid, but it's totally like, a fake, and you can just like, ignore it.

[be_on_your]

You tell him, dude.

[if_she_hollers]

Like, it would be incredibly icky.

[be_on_your]

What, you don't like dudes, dude?

[if_she_hollers]

. . . Huh? Like, not when we don't even know each other. He has this like, awful stare that he keeps using on me.

[dynamic_may_lee]

KOREAN DEATH PLAGUE?!?!?!

[if_she_hollers]

AAAAAHHHHHH! WHERE!?!??!

[dynamic_may_lee]

HOW DARE ANYONE CLAIM A "DEATH PLAGUE" WOULD COME FROM THE GREAT NATION OF KOREA! WE STAND FOR JUSTICE, NOT BIOLOGICAL WARFARE!

[if_she_hollers]

YOU'RE, LIKE, USING THE DEATH PLAGUE FOR WAR? THAT'S TERRIBLE.