I cant do it anymore.

[ifeartheclaus]

I know Im going nowhere in life. Everyone knows that. Fuck hillview, looks like I'll be doing the last thing I really wanted to do, go back to the factory. I hate it there so much, it just makes me feel like even more of a failure because I have to start working there again. I have no choice

Comments

[darius731]

Hey Jessie,

I know it's been about 6.5 million years since we last talked, but I'm really sad to see you this upset. I'm sorry your job will be sucky, but I don't think you should abandon hope yet. You're not stupid Jessie--if you really were, you wouldn't know it. Honestly! People who are really stupid just wander about feeling pleased, unaware of the fact that they are dumb, because they are not smart enough to realize it.

Drugs aren't going to help you turn your life around, but you already realize this. I think if you can stay clean and hold down a job okay, you could start thinking about school. Just take it bit by bit, starting small and building up. And don't believe that you're dumb--we all fuck up and make mistakes. Not to make this a cheesy Lifetime moment, but(I think) part of growing up is facing your mistakes and doing your best to make them better.

<333,

Brian

[ifeartheclaus]

Thankyou Brian. I have missed you alot. I find myself just going for a drive sometimes and ending up on your old street(at least I dont think you live there anymore). It means alot to me to see this comment you left for me. Im trying to clean up my life, its hard. But I did quit doing all the old shit I used to do. I wanted to clean up and prove to myself that I could quit. It just times like this where I wanna go back to it and its real hard to fight that off.

Stay in contact, we should hang out sometime too.

<3

[xxcarouselxx]

Brian is right you know.

I'd be lying if I said you were the same Jessie...from 2 years ago. But the other night we actually had an awesome conversation...something we hadn't done in a while...so I think old Jessie is coming back.

You aren't braindead...so theres always hope. I'm proud of you for recognizing your problem. Though I still want to rip Jaye Dempsey's arm off and beat him to death with it.

Just stay away from dumb assholes(maybe I should take my own advice..)

<3 amy

[drowningemerald]

hey, you're miserable, i'm miserable too. you should call me.

[bam77ber]

u know the only reason chad told u that was bc he was worried about where u were heading. and obviously it had something to do with u turning a lot of shit around. he told me that u turning shit around was something that was so important to him that he was willing to risk ur friendship. he was only trying to help in his own twisted way. and ur doin soo much better now, dont let stuff get to u too much, dont turn back now you've gone so far already