Talking to the Moon
Title: Talking to the Moon
Author: onkeyloves
Pairing: Onew/Key, Onew/Taemin, Minho/Taemin
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, Angst
Summary: At night when the stars light up my room, I sit by myself talking to the moon. Try to get to you in hopes you're on the other side, talking to me too. Or am I a fool who sits alone, talking to the moon.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away;
Jinki sat at the windows and gazed at the glowingly lonely crescent. The memories of them two kept replaying in his head. He really couldn’t forget any part of the six years of friendship. To the world, it was friendship but to them, they know what they shared was something more, something deeper and something special. Something they called love.
The past two years had been really harsh to Jinki. The same old feeling haunts him every night. His dark eye circles were so bad; one can easily believe that he has been awake for a week. No one knew though, no one really cared enough to find out why.
To everyone, Jinki is just an unfortunate young boy who went crazy after his friend went away and never came back. A friend, they say. A lover, that’s what he called him. It was a taboo around this town to fall in love with someone of the same gender. That is why they always kept their intimacy behind closed doors. It didn’t matter, as long as they know they have one another.
His neighbours advised him to get some sleep, go out, and meet new friends. That’s what young people like him should do. He simply shook his head. They don’t understand.
***
Its 10pm again, Jinki made his way to the balcony swing. The creaky sound from the swing is a constant reminder to Jinki. It’s been that long.
He began mouthing something, as if trying to say something. He was speaking to the moon, as usual. (It’s the other reason why his neighbors think he has already gone mad). He spoke like he was giving a heartfelt speech to the moon. If you’ve seen the look on his face, it was almost like the moon was responding to him. The stars that came along with the night lit up his room and the long lost smile was back on his face again.
You’re on the other side, aren’t you?
You’re there.
(They used to gaze at the moon together. And they’re always told that they’re from different worlds. But the world that they’re living in is not that different when they’re gazing at the same moon. That was what he always told Jinki to reassure that he will never leave Jinki.)
***
Taemin walked into the room with a packed bento. (He has the key to Jinki’s apartment). He placed the food on the dining table and tidied the place. He caught a glimpse at his hyung who was swinging gently. He walked over to the balcony and join Jinki. He didn’t sit on the swing though; he knew Jinki didn’t really like it when people took his seat. But Taemin was perhaps the only other person who is allowed to sit on the swing. Taemin grabbed the stool and crossed his arms on the balcony railings. He rested his head on his crossed arms and gazed into the dark sky.
“Hyung, I brought you supper.”
“Taemin ah, thank you.”
“Hyung, you know you don’t have to thank me every night.”
“Silly, I’m not thanking you for buying me supper. I just want to thank you for believing in me. I want to thank you for just being you.”
Taemin stood up and went over to the swing. He sat next to Jinki this time round and just smiled at Jinki.
“How’s school?”
“Pretty good. The teacher praised me during dance class today. She’s signing me up for a national competition. I’m pretty nervous though.”
“You’ll do well Taemin ah. I know you will.”
“Thanks hyung.”
They smiled while still gazing at the moon.
That’s how the night passed. It was almost a routine. But Jinki likes it like that. He’s the only person that he could actually speak to. But it’s not enough, Taemin’s not him.
***
“Taemin ah, you know if you want to help Jinki, the only way is to get him to seek help from the psychiatrist. Did you see his wrist? He’s slitting himself. He needs serious help before he kills himself anytime soon.”
“Minho hyung, I-I don’t know. Jinki hyung is actually fine. I spoke to him last night. He sounded…normal.”
“So you do realize that apart from last night, he is not himself every of the other nights? He needs help. Talk to him. Tell him the truth. He needs to get out of denial.”
“I’ll try. Will you come with me hyung? I’m just afraid that he’ll lose control like the other time.”
“Of course I will Taemin ah, we’ll talk to him tonight, alright?”
Taemin nodded, reluctantly.
***
It’s 10pm again. Taemin went into the apartment and see the usual. “Hyung, I’m here with Minho hyung tonight.”
“Hi, Jinki hyung.” Minho said with his deep, mellow voice.
Jinki nodded to show acknowledgement. He didn’t like to talk to anyone else. He only spoke to Taemin.
The couple walked to the balcony and joined Jinki. The latter looked uncomfortable. Jinki knew Minho since junior school. They were in the same music class. But ever since Jinki went bonkers, it was almost like they were acquaintance. Minho mustered the courage and broke the screaming silence. (Jinki was mouthing something once again.)
“Hyung, you should stop it. He’s not around anymore.”
Jinki ignored Minho and continued swinging.
“Hyung listen to me. You’ve got to let him go. He is dead. No more. You need to let him go.”
Jinki stopped. He stood up and walked to his bed. He crawled under the sheets and he covered his head with the fluffy pillow to shut away from everyone, to shut reality out.
Minho, who was getting impatient, walked over and pulled the pillows out. Taemin followed after and tried to stop Minho. But Minho was too strong for Taemin.
“HYUNG STOP IT. KIBUM IS DEAD. YOU NEED TO STOP THIS AND SEEK HELP. YOU’RE HARMING YOURSELF.”
Jinki, who seemed to have possessed an unknown flow of strength managed to hold on to the pillows (which Minho kept trying to grab), finally let go. But he was not his usual gentle self. The anger from his eyes scared Taemin who hid at a corner. Jinki started screaming like he’d never done.
“HE IS NOT DEAD. KIBUM IS NOT DEAD.”
Angry tears rolled down his flushed red cheeks. Taemin went over and wrapped Jinki in his arms. “Minho hyung stop it, stop it already. Wait for me downstairs. I’d like to speak to Jinki hyung, alone.”
Minho nodded and left.
“Hyung, you know Minho and I didn’t mean it the bad way. We’re just really worried about you. I’ll come back tomorrow. Go to sleep early and don’t think too much alright? Promise me that you’ll take care.”
Taemin tucked Jinki into bed and made sure his hyung fell asleep before he left.
***
Minho and Taemin went over to Jinki’s house the next morning. Little did they know, that was the last time they’re going to see Jinki.
Jinki was lying on the bed with white foam spilling out of his mouth. He had a photo (of Kibum and him) grabbed tightly in one hand while the other arm was hanging at the side of the bed. Minho picked up an empty bottle from the floor which was littered with some white pills.
“He swallowed them all.” Minho said as he walked over to hug Taemin. They were both tearing a little because they knew Jinki would’ve chosen this path no matter what. He loved Kibum too much to let him go. Taemin walked over to the dining table and picked up a piece of note.
“Take care, Taemin ah.
Hyung loves you.
Thank you Minho, I know you meant well.
Take care of Taemin, promise me you will.
It’s time for closure.
Love, Jinki.”
Or am I a fool
who sits alone
Talking to the moon;
***
A/N: Long time no see y’all! Hope you’ve enjoyed it! Hello new readers! I love you guys but I won’t be too free to write a lot for now! :( But I will when I do find time! Thank you for taking time to read once again! It’s appreciated! Comments are really loved! By the way this is inspired by Talking to the Moon by Bruno Mars ♥
Author: onkeyloves
Pairing: Onew/Key, Onew/Taemin, Minho/Taemin
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, Angst
Summary: At night when the stars light up my room, I sit by myself talking to the moon. Try to get to you in hopes you're on the other side, talking to me too. Or am I a fool who sits alone, talking to the moon.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away;
Jinki sat at the windows and gazed at the glowingly lonely crescent. The memories of them two kept replaying in his head. He really couldn’t forget any part of the six years of friendship. To the world, it was friendship but to them, they know what they shared was something more, something deeper and something special. Something they called love.
The past two years had been really harsh to Jinki. The same old feeling haunts him every night. His dark eye circles were so bad; one can easily believe that he has been awake for a week. No one knew though, no one really cared enough to find out why.
To everyone, Jinki is just an unfortunate young boy who went crazy after his friend went away and never came back. A friend, they say. A lover, that’s what he called him. It was a taboo around this town to fall in love with someone of the same gender. That is why they always kept their intimacy behind closed doors. It didn’t matter, as long as they know they have one another.
His neighbours advised him to get some sleep, go out, and meet new friends. That’s what young people like him should do. He simply shook his head. They don’t understand.
***
Its 10pm again, Jinki made his way to the balcony swing. The creaky sound from the swing is a constant reminder to Jinki. It’s been that long.
He began mouthing something, as if trying to say something. He was speaking to the moon, as usual. (It’s the other reason why his neighbors think he has already gone mad). He spoke like he was giving a heartfelt speech to the moon. If you’ve seen the look on his face, it was almost like the moon was responding to him. The stars that came along with the night lit up his room and the long lost smile was back on his face again.
You’re on the other side, aren’t you?
You’re there.
(They used to gaze at the moon together. And they’re always told that they’re from different worlds. But the world that they’re living in is not that different when they’re gazing at the same moon. That was what he always told Jinki to reassure that he will never leave Jinki.)
***
Taemin walked into the room with a packed bento. (He has the key to Jinki’s apartment). He placed the food on the dining table and tidied the place. He caught a glimpse at his hyung who was swinging gently. He walked over to the balcony and join Jinki. He didn’t sit on the swing though; he knew Jinki didn’t really like it when people took his seat. But Taemin was perhaps the only other person who is allowed to sit on the swing. Taemin grabbed the stool and crossed his arms on the balcony railings. He rested his head on his crossed arms and gazed into the dark sky.
“Hyung, I brought you supper.”
“Taemin ah, thank you.”
“Hyung, you know you don’t have to thank me every night.”
“Silly, I’m not thanking you for buying me supper. I just want to thank you for believing in me. I want to thank you for just being you.”
Taemin stood up and went over to the swing. He sat next to Jinki this time round and just smiled at Jinki.
“How’s school?”
“Pretty good. The teacher praised me during dance class today. She’s signing me up for a national competition. I’m pretty nervous though.”
“You’ll do well Taemin ah. I know you will.”
“Thanks hyung.”
They smiled while still gazing at the moon.
That’s how the night passed. It was almost a routine. But Jinki likes it like that. He’s the only person that he could actually speak to. But it’s not enough, Taemin’s not him.
***
“Taemin ah, you know if you want to help Jinki, the only way is to get him to seek help from the psychiatrist. Did you see his wrist? He’s slitting himself. He needs serious help before he kills himself anytime soon.”
“Minho hyung, I-I don’t know. Jinki hyung is actually fine. I spoke to him last night. He sounded…normal.”
“So you do realize that apart from last night, he is not himself every of the other nights? He needs help. Talk to him. Tell him the truth. He needs to get out of denial.”
“I’ll try. Will you come with me hyung? I’m just afraid that he’ll lose control like the other time.”
“Of course I will Taemin ah, we’ll talk to him tonight, alright?”
Taemin nodded, reluctantly.
***
It’s 10pm again. Taemin went into the apartment and see the usual. “Hyung, I’m here with Minho hyung tonight.”
“Hi, Jinki hyung.” Minho said with his deep, mellow voice.
Jinki nodded to show acknowledgement. He didn’t like to talk to anyone else. He only spoke to Taemin.
The couple walked to the balcony and joined Jinki. The latter looked uncomfortable. Jinki knew Minho since junior school. They were in the same music class. But ever since Jinki went bonkers, it was almost like they were acquaintance. Minho mustered the courage and broke the screaming silence. (Jinki was mouthing something once again.)
“Hyung, you should stop it. He’s not around anymore.”
Jinki ignored Minho and continued swinging.
“Hyung listen to me. You’ve got to let him go. He is dead. No more. You need to let him go.”
Jinki stopped. He stood up and walked to his bed. He crawled under the sheets and he covered his head with the fluffy pillow to shut away from everyone, to shut reality out.
Minho, who was getting impatient, walked over and pulled the pillows out. Taemin followed after and tried to stop Minho. But Minho was too strong for Taemin.
“HYUNG STOP IT. KIBUM IS DEAD. YOU NEED TO STOP THIS AND SEEK HELP. YOU’RE HARMING YOURSELF.”
Jinki, who seemed to have possessed an unknown flow of strength managed to hold on to the pillows (which Minho kept trying to grab), finally let go. But he was not his usual gentle self. The anger from his eyes scared Taemin who hid at a corner. Jinki started screaming like he’d never done.
“HE IS NOT DEAD. KIBUM IS NOT DEAD.”
Angry tears rolled down his flushed red cheeks. Taemin went over and wrapped Jinki in his arms. “Minho hyung stop it, stop it already. Wait for me downstairs. I’d like to speak to Jinki hyung, alone.”
Minho nodded and left.
“Hyung, you know Minho and I didn’t mean it the bad way. We’re just really worried about you. I’ll come back tomorrow. Go to sleep early and don’t think too much alright? Promise me that you’ll take care.”
Taemin tucked Jinki into bed and made sure his hyung fell asleep before he left.
***
Minho and Taemin went over to Jinki’s house the next morning. Little did they know, that was the last time they’re going to see Jinki.
Jinki was lying on the bed with white foam spilling out of his mouth. He had a photo (of Kibum and him) grabbed tightly in one hand while the other arm was hanging at the side of the bed. Minho picked up an empty bottle from the floor which was littered with some white pills.
“He swallowed them all.” Minho said as he walked over to hug Taemin. They were both tearing a little because they knew Jinki would’ve chosen this path no matter what. He loved Kibum too much to let him go. Taemin walked over to the dining table and picked up a piece of note.
“Take care, Taemin ah.
Hyung loves you.
Thank you Minho, I know you meant well.
Take care of Taemin, promise me you will.
It’s time for closure.
Love, Jinki.”
Or am I a fool
who sits alone
Talking to the moon;
***
A/N: Long time no see y’all! Hope you’ve enjoyed it! Hello new readers! I love you guys but I won’t be too free to write a lot for now! :( But I will when I do find time! Thank you for taking time to read once again! It’s appreciated! Comments are really loved! By the way this is inspired by Talking to the Moon by Bruno Mars ♥