I am really glad I was so educated on the cascade of interventions and prepared. I think declining the c-section was a really hard decision but I knew she was fine and the testing was proving that.
The midwife only helped with counter pressure once or twice. S tried but couldn't get it right and the mood I was in, I could only have it perfect but I had no idea what perfect was.
I don't know why my back labour was so bad because she was perfectly positioned, no head/chin tilt and she was anterior. Maybe it was partially that I had injured my sacrum. My postpartum doula said it was a normal physiological thing though. If I do have another baby I think I will get a TENS machine and learn more techniques to help it. But I think I am the type of person who actually likes to labour on her own in the dark, maybe in water with regular reassurance that the baby is fine. Being touched was mostly annoying.
Yeah, counterpressure... my midwife could do it perfectly. The doula tried but didn't have quite the magic touch. I wonder what makes it perfect...
I don't know what to think about the next labor since it has to be a hospital one and then don't have water tubs. I guess I'll do a LOT of spinningbabies, maybe some chiropracty, and hope the baby ends up optimally positioned.
I want/need to learn techniques to be used for back labour before we have our next baby.
I wish I was able to at least labour in the water.
I did osteopathy, acupuncture, massage and spinning babies stuff and she was perfectly positioned. I think all that helped. Really I did have a really good labour and delivery and the only interventions were the monitoring, if monitoring is even an intervention and the pain relief which didn't really lessen the pain at all, they just made me care less about the pain and more able to relax through it.
I do want another baby from me which I didn't want before I had her! S is going to have one and then we'll see if I can go again. I am 29 so it depends on a lot of things. I might be 35 before we're ready and that's almost pushing it time-wise. I don't want to be labeled high risk due to 'advanced maternal age' which some providers do, it's ridiculous. I am having a home-birth. S is going to go to the birth centre for hers (if we are low risk).
I think that ultimately the important thing is you're happy now and even more than that- that you have a healthy, happy child. I will admit that I worry about women planning out details of their births, you can't know what is going to happen. I think the key is yes, to be prepared, but to understand there may be medical reasons it can't happen, and not to become too invested, as I have read about women experiencing PTSD because child birth wasn't how they imagined it.
It's interesting to think of the medical imperatives in childbirth vs. the choice, capabilities and understandings of women, having studied it briefly.
I'm glad you've been able to make peace with what happened, and even more so, that you have a beautiful baby now! I suppose at the end of the day, the birth is just the beginning, it's the rest of your lives that really matter ;)
I think I'm more disappointed that I was transferred for a non-reason and how I was spoken to and not listened to when I said over and over that she was genetically small. There should have been more markers on the ultrasound if she was IUGR and she would have been showing other signs. I didn't want to have to fight to have a vaginal birth, and they didn't give me more information. But I was prepared as I am really educated about birth and OBs and cascade of interventions thankfully. Even though it sucked, I'm glad I fought for it, I would have been devastated if I had said yes to a c-section for no reason. But if she had shown signs that she wasn't doing well, I would have done everything
( ... )
I completely agree, especially where women are encouraged to have c-sections because it's easier for the doctors. Personally I don't think it should be a choice, I think it should only happen if it needs to. Treating women as if it is an illness is another huge problem, it just isn't. I suppose the trick is managing the fact that it's an utterly necessary and normal part of life with the medical imperatives. Very difficult. And very expensive.
I don't know whether I want to be childfree or not. I think I probably do want babies, but not for about 10 years!
I was up and about cleaning the birth centre room the night of the birth. I think the birth hormones must be amazing. I started to get tired near the end of birth and I would have struggled with a long labour but thankfully my labour was actually really short. I only had hard labour for 3.5hrs and the pushing felt good.
I'm doing more now than I was doing before I was pregnant and feeling good, but I am going to scale things back and do less though. My CFS/ME is not around right now, but I'm reluctant to write that because putting that into words is a worry. I do know that could be very temporary so I will just be very thankful. If it's the breast-feeding I am going to breast-feed as long as possible.
What an emotional read! With O, I had the same reaction to morphine, passing out between contractions. Unfortunately, that meant that while I heard the midwife being concerned that they'd lost the FHM trace and wishing she'd put one on his scalp, I didn't hear her say that she'd found it again because I was asleep - panic! And with Daph, I had to try and fight the need to push for a while (I had a wonderful midwife with me and trusted her implicitly)... it was nigh on asking the impossible.
I hated the monitors so much. The internal one was better for me. Intermittent monitoring would have been so much better.
I don't think the midwife realised I was progressing so quickly. The previous day I was fingertip dilated (Bishop score 3) and then my active labour was 3.5hrs. I went from 0-10 in 6hrs. I wish I had known I was so close to delivering as far as pain relief goes. In hindsight it's so obvious I was in transition when I was begging for that epidural. So glad I didn't have it as I would have missed the pushing. It was amazing feeling my body do that on it's own.
It's pretty amazing that I went into labour that very day.
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Ugh on those doctors, but I'm glad you got so much of what you wanted by the end. Did the midwives eventually help you more with counterpressure?
Back labor really is something isn't it?
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The midwife only helped with counter pressure once or twice. S tried but couldn't get it right and the mood I was in, I could only have it perfect but I had no idea what perfect was.
I don't know why my back labour was so bad because she was perfectly positioned, no head/chin tilt and she was anterior. Maybe it was partially that I had injured my sacrum. My postpartum doula said it was a normal physiological thing though. If I do have another baby I think I will get a TENS machine and learn more techniques to help it. But I think I am the type of person who actually likes to labour on her own in the dark, maybe in water with regular reassurance that the baby is fine. Being touched was mostly annoying.
Reply
I don't know what to think about the next labor since it has to be a hospital one and then don't have water tubs. I guess I'll do a LOT of spinningbabies, maybe some chiropracty, and hope the baby ends up optimally positioned.
Reply
I wish I was able to at least labour in the water.
I did osteopathy, acupuncture, massage and spinning babies stuff and she was perfectly positioned. I think all that helped. Really I did have a really good labour and delivery and the only interventions were the monitoring, if monitoring is even an intervention and the pain relief which didn't really lessen the pain at all, they just made me care less about the pain and more able to relax through it.
I do want another baby from me which I didn't want before I had her! S is going to have one and then we'll see if I can go again. I am 29 so it depends on a lot of things. I might be 35 before we're ready and that's almost pushing it time-wise. I don't want to be labeled high risk due to 'advanced maternal age' which some providers do, it's ridiculous. I am having a home-birth. S is going to go to the birth centre for hers (if we are low risk).
Reply
I will admit that I worry about women planning out details of their births, you can't know what is going to happen. I think the key is yes, to be prepared, but to understand there may be medical reasons it can't happen, and not to become too invested, as I have read about women experiencing PTSD because child birth wasn't how they imagined it.
It's interesting to think of the medical imperatives in childbirth vs. the choice, capabilities and understandings of women, having studied it briefly.
I'm glad you've been able to make peace with what happened, and even more so, that you have a beautiful baby now! I suppose at the end of the day, the birth is just the beginning, it's the rest of your lives that really matter ;)
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I don't know whether I want to be childfree or not. I think I probably do want babies, but not for about 10 years!
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I have to say, I am exhausted just reading this.
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I'm doing more now than I was doing before I was pregnant and feeling good, but I am going to scale things back and do less though. My CFS/ME is not around right now, but I'm reluctant to write that because putting that into words is a worry. I do know that could be very temporary so I will just be very thankful. If it's the breast-feeding I am going to breast-feed as long as possible.
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You did so well!
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I don't think the midwife realised I was progressing so quickly. The previous day I was fingertip dilated (Bishop score 3) and then my active labour was 3.5hrs. I went from 0-10 in 6hrs. I wish I had known I was so close to delivering as far as pain relief goes. In hindsight it's so obvious I was in transition when I was begging for that epidural. So glad I didn't have it as I would have missed the pushing. It was amazing feeling my body do that on it's own.
It's pretty amazing that I went into labour that very day.
I did throw up twice too, yuck.
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