''I KEEP A PART OF YOU WITH ME''
TITLE: ''I KEEP A PART OF YOU WITH ME''
Pairing: Adam/Kris
Beta: none. All mistakes are mine.
Word count: 1200
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. Completely fabricated.
Summary: ''Destiny… Fate, I believe, with all my heart, I believe.''
Note: This is a sequel to IN MY HEART, THERE WILL ALWAYS BE A PLACE FOR YOU FOR ALL MY LIFE. Thank you all for reading:)
I am sitting outside of the restaurant, looking at the waves splashing to the air as it finally hit the giant rocks settled at the shore. It calms my mind, it gives me peace and makes me feel like I could go on for another day or two without feeling that emptiness again, that hole resides in me. This place is my favorite, our favorite actually. I met Adam in this place, and from that day, we were inseparable. We fell in love here, I gave him my promised that I would love him until my last breath . I promised him that I would never hurt him.. . but I did.
It’s been 26 months and 4 days since that night, the night I last made love to him. The night, where I decided to end things with him. And the same night that killed me inside. I haven’t seen or heard from him since then, I don’t even know if he’s still herein LA or not. But what I’m certain of, I didn’t stop loving him. I never stop loving him, even when I thought I was falling for another man, I know that he will always have a part of me. he always has my heart, the whole of it. I was blinded by fame and overwhelmed by people’s attention, I left him behind and began doing some things that I would regret for the rest of my life… and I do.
The thing is, for over 2 years, I never looked up for him. When my manager, Bill, found me in our house, 3 days after that night. I was all so fucked up, so dirty and never showered. I laid on our bed for straight 3 days without any food, I just stood up to pissed, then cry and slept again. Until I couldn't cry anymore, no more tears to flow and I was so numbed that I thought I could sliced my heart out without even feeling it. My phone continuously rang, the doorbell had never stopped buzzing, but I ignored them all. Until whoever was calling, whoever was buzzing, apparently got tired and left me alone.
If it wasn’t for Bill, I probably ended up dead. I didn’t even care at that time, all I know, I can’t continue living my life without him, without Adam.
I heard him came inside my house, I pretended to be asleep. He directly went to the bathroom and ran the tub, then he sat beside me. He looked at me for a while and told me to get the fuck up and shower. Just like that, I did what I was told. When I was putting on some fresh clothes, he came and took my wrist and sat me on my dining table with coffee and pancakes in front of me.
‘’eat’’ he said, and I did. I am so tired and all messed up even to argue, so, I just did.
After I finished, he sat me on my living room couch. I prepared myself for a lengthy sermon that I felt I started to get dizzy just thinking about it. But to my surprised, he didn’t. instead, he opened my eyes to those things that I had never understood before. He made me realized that what had happened, happened, and I couldn’t change it. But I can do better at the present and my future lies on what I do now.
‘’you believe in Destiny, Kris?’’ Bill asked. His green eyes looking at me with brotherly affection.
‘’no, yes… I don’t know.’’ I answered, looking back at him, unsure of what Bill was leading on.
‘’you should, if you feel that Adam is your destiny, then it will happen. No matter what had happened between you two, and no matter where you are right now… if it is you and him, you will be at the end. I promise you that.’’
‘’how would I know that it’s him?.. that we are destined to be with each other?’’
‘’believe me, you just know.’’
So, I got my act done and started to picked up the pieces. I straightened everything that was crumpled and tried to focus. I wanted to prepare myself, I wanted to be strong. So, when we finally bumped into each other, I could be that man for him again.
I continue making music and entertain people, I try to live my life each day and be hopeful enough that THAT day would come sooner rather than later.
The day that we will be together again,
The day that we are destined to meet again.
The day that I can see his smile,
I can hold his hands,
I can look into that piercing eyes.
The day that I can kiss that lips again,
smell the familiar scent,
and make love over and over again.
I would give everything up, just to say how much I love him, how much I need him. The only one that completes me. The only one who could make me whole again.
Yes, I never looked for him. I waited and waited for our fate to bring us back into each others' arms. Sometimes, I feel that I couldn’t wait any longer. That I needed him so bad that I thought I’d go crazy, but I always replays on my mind what Bill had told me. ‘’patience’’, ‘’have faith’’, ‘’believe’’… and I'm trying, God knows how hard I'm trying to be strong. But the tears won’t stop streaming down my face at night, when I turn to his side and… he wasn’t there. How the night is so cold and so empty. I broke into sob each time I read his letter to me, reminding me how stupid I was for letting go of what we had. For letting go of someone like Adam, someone who loved me unconditionally.
As I always do for 26 months now, coming to this restaurant, would somehow helped me feel that Adam is just around. I could feel him here, that everywhere I turned my eyes to, I could see him.
How we bumped into each other when first met,
how he first smiled at me,
how we had our first date,
our first kiss.
The first time I held his hand,
the first time I said ‘I love you’.
Even our first fight was here at this same spot that I am sitting right now, I cannot even remember the reason but the sweet memories still lives on. That’s the reason I come here so often, to somehow gives me courage by reminding myself of what could we have in the future. That we could be like that again, that we could be that happy again.
As I am sitting here now, wondering what Adam is doing right at this moment.
Does he still think about me?
Does he misses me, like I miss him?
Does he still loves me, like I always love him?
But I’m still waiting… and I would never get tired of waiting. One day, all of my questions will be answered, and I couldn’t wait for that day to happen. But I need to. Destiny… Fate, I believe, with all my heart, I believe.
SEQUEL: THERE YOU'LL BE
Pairing: Adam/Kris
Beta: none. All mistakes are mine.
Word count: 1200
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. Completely fabricated.
Summary: ''Destiny… Fate, I believe, with all my heart, I believe.''
Note: This is a sequel to IN MY HEART, THERE WILL ALWAYS BE A PLACE FOR YOU FOR ALL MY LIFE. Thank you all for reading:)
I am sitting outside of the restaurant, looking at the waves splashing to the air as it finally hit the giant rocks settled at the shore. It calms my mind, it gives me peace and makes me feel like I could go on for another day or two without feeling that emptiness again, that hole resides in me. This place is my favorite, our favorite actually. I met Adam in this place, and from that day, we were inseparable. We fell in love here, I gave him my promised that I would love him until my last breath . I promised him that I would never hurt him.. . but I did.
It’s been 26 months and 4 days since that night, the night I last made love to him. The night, where I decided to end things with him. And the same night that killed me inside. I haven’t seen or heard from him since then, I don’t even know if he’s still herein LA or not. But what I’m certain of, I didn’t stop loving him. I never stop loving him, even when I thought I was falling for another man, I know that he will always have a part of me. he always has my heart, the whole of it. I was blinded by fame and overwhelmed by people’s attention, I left him behind and began doing some things that I would regret for the rest of my life… and I do.
The thing is, for over 2 years, I never looked up for him. When my manager, Bill, found me in our house, 3 days after that night. I was all so fucked up, so dirty and never showered. I laid on our bed for straight 3 days without any food, I just stood up to pissed, then cry and slept again. Until I couldn't cry anymore, no more tears to flow and I was so numbed that I thought I could sliced my heart out without even feeling it. My phone continuously rang, the doorbell had never stopped buzzing, but I ignored them all. Until whoever was calling, whoever was buzzing, apparently got tired and left me alone.
If it wasn’t for Bill, I probably ended up dead. I didn’t even care at that time, all I know, I can’t continue living my life without him, without Adam.
I heard him came inside my house, I pretended to be asleep. He directly went to the bathroom and ran the tub, then he sat beside me. He looked at me for a while and told me to get the fuck up and shower. Just like that, I did what I was told. When I was putting on some fresh clothes, he came and took my wrist and sat me on my dining table with coffee and pancakes in front of me.
‘’eat’’ he said, and I did. I am so tired and all messed up even to argue, so, I just did.
After I finished, he sat me on my living room couch. I prepared myself for a lengthy sermon that I felt I started to get dizzy just thinking about it. But to my surprised, he didn’t. instead, he opened my eyes to those things that I had never understood before. He made me realized that what had happened, happened, and I couldn’t change it. But I can do better at the present and my future lies on what I do now.
‘’you believe in Destiny, Kris?’’ Bill asked. His green eyes looking at me with brotherly affection.
‘’no, yes… I don’t know.’’ I answered, looking back at him, unsure of what Bill was leading on.
‘’you should, if you feel that Adam is your destiny, then it will happen. No matter what had happened between you two, and no matter where you are right now… if it is you and him, you will be at the end. I promise you that.’’
‘’how would I know that it’s him?.. that we are destined to be with each other?’’
‘’believe me, you just know.’’
So, I got my act done and started to picked up the pieces. I straightened everything that was crumpled and tried to focus. I wanted to prepare myself, I wanted to be strong. So, when we finally bumped into each other, I could be that man for him again.
I continue making music and entertain people, I try to live my life each day and be hopeful enough that THAT day would come sooner rather than later.
The day that we will be together again,
The day that we are destined to meet again.
The day that I can see his smile,
I can hold his hands,
I can look into that piercing eyes.
The day that I can kiss that lips again,
smell the familiar scent,
and make love over and over again.
I would give everything up, just to say how much I love him, how much I need him. The only one that completes me. The only one who could make me whole again.
Yes, I never looked for him. I waited and waited for our fate to bring us back into each others' arms. Sometimes, I feel that I couldn’t wait any longer. That I needed him so bad that I thought I’d go crazy, but I always replays on my mind what Bill had told me. ‘’patience’’, ‘’have faith’’, ‘’believe’’… and I'm trying, God knows how hard I'm trying to be strong. But the tears won’t stop streaming down my face at night, when I turn to his side and… he wasn’t there. How the night is so cold and so empty. I broke into sob each time I read his letter to me, reminding me how stupid I was for letting go of what we had. For letting go of someone like Adam, someone who loved me unconditionally.
As I always do for 26 months now, coming to this restaurant, would somehow helped me feel that Adam is just around. I could feel him here, that everywhere I turned my eyes to, I could see him.
How we bumped into each other when first met,
how he first smiled at me,
how we had our first date,
our first kiss.
The first time I held his hand,
the first time I said ‘I love you’.
Even our first fight was here at this same spot that I am sitting right now, I cannot even remember the reason but the sweet memories still lives on. That’s the reason I come here so often, to somehow gives me courage by reminding myself of what could we have in the future. That we could be like that again, that we could be that happy again.
As I am sitting here now, wondering what Adam is doing right at this moment.
Does he still think about me?
Does he misses me, like I miss him?
Does he still loves me, like I always love him?
But I’m still waiting… and I would never get tired of waiting. One day, all of my questions will be answered, and I couldn’t wait for that day to happen. But I need to. Destiny… Fate, I believe, with all my heart, I believe.
SEQUEL: THERE YOU'LL BE