The Ultimate Accessory Part 3
Part 3 of my boosh fic. yay!
“Vince! Come ‘ere!”
“Alright?” Vince grinned at his friend. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to some of your friends?”
“Ha! For once it’s you saying that to me!” Howard whirled arouud drunkenly.
“Oi, watch it! Who helped you out with that girl at your birthday party?”
“That’s in the past Vince. This is now. Howard Moon? He’s a new man.”
“Alright, just get someone to get me a drink would ya?”
A passing server shoved another flirtini into his hands.
“Anyway, where were you all this time?”
“Oh, nice to see you noticed I was gone!”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“What was with that ignoring me thing before? I’ve never felt so dropped in my whole life!”
Howard’s tail snatched a drink off a tray.
“See? What did I tell ya about a tail! Tails are genius.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
“You’re just bitter that I know how to accessorise a tail and you don’t!”
“Vince- you’re forgetting who’s the one with the tail here!”
“Alright, keep your little monkey boots on!”
“You like parties! Just have fun, ok?”
“I’d be able to have fun if there were some real people here!”
“Real people? Bin men are real people! They’re more real than you! You’re like fairy floss! You just melt in your mouth!”
“Yeah? At least I’m not grisly!”
Vince sauntered morosely off and tried to distract himself by dancing wildly in the centre of the room.
Howard tried to distract himself by doing more and more outrageous party tricks with his tail, but every time anyone clapped or cheered Vince’s beaming face would sidle across his mind.
Eventually the party disbanded.
Howard and Vince both stumbled to their room separately, but by some quirk of fate, arrived together.
Howard pushed the door open.
The room they’d been given, had had a complete makeover.
Before when they’d first been shown the room it had been drab and brown. A mediocre sort of room, with no spirit or life. Now festooned around the place were colourful drapes, a clothes rack, though Vince had no clothes to put on it, it made him feel more at home.
Also spread around were knickknacks he’d picked up that reminded him of the Nabootique.
Crazily coloured cushions covered the couch that was set in the corner and sprouted from the bed.
“Did you do all this?”
“Yeah.” Vince’s tone was defiant.
“It’s pretty good actually....”
“Thanks Howard!” Vince smiled at his friend and toed the ground slightly, like he was shy.
“I got you a present.”
“You did?” Vince’s eyes were wide and blue.
Howard produced a cape from somewhere,
“I had the bin men knock it up especially.” Howard waved his hand in the air in a vaguely dismissive gesture.
Vince put the cape on, and danced around, swirling the cape around himself.
“This is well fashion! Cape’s never get old! Thanks ‘Oward!”
“No problem, little man.”
Vince gave a final turn about the room, coming to rest in front of the bed.
He stared at it.
Howard looked at it.
Vince giggled and bounced onto the bed, the only bed.
“Come on Howard!”
Vince untied the cape from around his neck, and stripped his mirror ball suit off (his shoes magically disappearing in the process). In his underwear, he crawled under the covers, pulling them up to his chin. He sat beaming cunningly at Howard.
Howard coughed. His eyes narrowed, darting about the room.
“I’ll be fine on the couch, thank you very much, sir.”
Howard sat down on the couch and rearranged the cushions so that they supported him.
He lay down uncomfortably, spreading the cape around himself.
Vince giggled at him from the comfort of the bed. He stretched extravagantly.
“D’you remember the time we ate pizza?”
As one Vince and Howard sat up in their beds.
“Pizza, Pizza, Everybody eats ya,
Sitting in my tummy space,
Nothing like the moon’s face,
Tomayto, Tomahto, Potayto, Potahto,
Basil crunchy crispy bits,
....Sssssssssss *sizzling noise* sssssssssss....”
Howard smiled, “Good times.”
Vince smiled as well.
“G’night ‘Oward.”
“Sleep tight little man.”
Howard was woken in the middle of the night by a warm body snuggling onto the couch with him.
He rolled over.
“What are you doin’?”
“I got lonely, over there, by myself, in that big bed. I’m not used to having so much space.”
Luckily the couch was fairly large, and Howard was too comfortable and warm to move.
“Go to sleep Vince,” he said wearily and rolled back over.
Vince wriggled up to Howard and yawned, before drifting off to sleep.
“Vince! Come ‘ere!”
“Alright?” Vince grinned at his friend. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to some of your friends?”
“Ha! For once it’s you saying that to me!” Howard whirled arouud drunkenly.
“Oi, watch it! Who helped you out with that girl at your birthday party?”
“That’s in the past Vince. This is now. Howard Moon? He’s a new man.”
“Alright, just get someone to get me a drink would ya?”
A passing server shoved another flirtini into his hands.
“Anyway, where were you all this time?”
“Oh, nice to see you noticed I was gone!”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“What was with that ignoring me thing before? I’ve never felt so dropped in my whole life!”
Howard’s tail snatched a drink off a tray.
“See? What did I tell ya about a tail! Tails are genius.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
“You’re just bitter that I know how to accessorise a tail and you don’t!”
“Vince- you’re forgetting who’s the one with the tail here!”
“Alright, keep your little monkey boots on!”
“You like parties! Just have fun, ok?”
“I’d be able to have fun if there were some real people here!”
“Real people? Bin men are real people! They’re more real than you! You’re like fairy floss! You just melt in your mouth!”
“Yeah? At least I’m not grisly!”
Vince sauntered morosely off and tried to distract himself by dancing wildly in the centre of the room.
Howard tried to distract himself by doing more and more outrageous party tricks with his tail, but every time anyone clapped or cheered Vince’s beaming face would sidle across his mind.
Eventually the party disbanded.
Howard and Vince both stumbled to their room separately, but by some quirk of fate, arrived together.
Howard pushed the door open.
The room they’d been given, had had a complete makeover.
Before when they’d first been shown the room it had been drab and brown. A mediocre sort of room, with no spirit or life. Now festooned around the place were colourful drapes, a clothes rack, though Vince had no clothes to put on it, it made him feel more at home.
Also spread around were knickknacks he’d picked up that reminded him of the Nabootique.
Crazily coloured cushions covered the couch that was set in the corner and sprouted from the bed.
“Did you do all this?”
“Yeah.” Vince’s tone was defiant.
“It’s pretty good actually....”
“Thanks Howard!” Vince smiled at his friend and toed the ground slightly, like he was shy.
“I got you a present.”
“You did?” Vince’s eyes were wide and blue.
Howard produced a cape from somewhere,
“I had the bin men knock it up especially.” Howard waved his hand in the air in a vaguely dismissive gesture.
Vince put the cape on, and danced around, swirling the cape around himself.
“This is well fashion! Cape’s never get old! Thanks ‘Oward!”
“No problem, little man.”
Vince gave a final turn about the room, coming to rest in front of the bed.
He stared at it.
Howard looked at it.
Vince giggled and bounced onto the bed, the only bed.
“Come on Howard!”
Vince untied the cape from around his neck, and stripped his mirror ball suit off (his shoes magically disappearing in the process). In his underwear, he crawled under the covers, pulling them up to his chin. He sat beaming cunningly at Howard.
Howard coughed. His eyes narrowed, darting about the room.
“I’ll be fine on the couch, thank you very much, sir.”
Howard sat down on the couch and rearranged the cushions so that they supported him.
He lay down uncomfortably, spreading the cape around himself.
Vince giggled at him from the comfort of the bed. He stretched extravagantly.
“D’you remember the time we ate pizza?”
As one Vince and Howard sat up in their beds.
“Pizza, Pizza, Everybody eats ya,
Sitting in my tummy space,
Nothing like the moon’s face,
Tomayto, Tomahto, Potayto, Potahto,
Basil crunchy crispy bits,
....Sssssssssss *sizzling noise* sssssssssss....”
Howard smiled, “Good times.”
Vince smiled as well.
“G’night ‘Oward.”
“Sleep tight little man.”
Howard was woken in the middle of the night by a warm body snuggling onto the couch with him.
He rolled over.
“What are you doin’?”
“I got lonely, over there, by myself, in that big bed. I’m not used to having so much space.”
Luckily the couch was fairly large, and Howard was too comfortable and warm to move.
“Go to sleep Vince,” he said wearily and rolled back over.
Vince wriggled up to Howard and yawned, before drifting off to sleep.