Comments | imvus: (без темы)

imvus

(Untitled)

Jul 21, 2011 19:49

Title: Almost Pairing/Focus: Ontae Rating: NC-17 (a little smut and cussing) Summary: Second attempt at writing and first attempt at something like smut. Just plain frustrated smut, no real plot other then never getting what they really want. (runs and hides) ( Read more... )

ontae, smut, shinee

Comments 11

ontaejongminkey July 22 2011, 01:19:16 UTC

O____O
ALMOST sagjshdfgksdgfksd

imvus July 22 2011, 01:32:24 UTC

was it okay? I wrote in about really fast after watching some movie that had nothing to do with this.. so weird. But it just poured out..lol

ontaejongminkey July 22 2011, 01:46:14 UTC

It's a-okay! :)
lol Jinki and Taemin sexually frustrated is one of the best things in the fanfic fandom tbh :P

imvus July 22 2011, 02:15:07 UTC

Thanks, I appreciate you reading it. :)

jinkibumiminho July 22 2011, 02:29:43 UTC

Ahhh! It's the attack of the cockblocking author!!!

But seriously, this was hawwt and realistic. Nice!

min7girl July 22 2011, 13:31:20 UTC

Yeah! Almost! I totally agree. Ontae getting hot and bother and trying not to get caught.

Sexy!

imvus July 22 2011, 14:53:44 UTC

eventually I will finally get into a real one but my vocabluary and writing needs improvement and ability to describe in words what is in my head is harder then I thought. Still stuggling with being shy about writing a few of the "words" too.. lol. I don't know how you guys do it everyday and so beautifully.

min7girl July 22 2011, 15:03:56 UTC

As far as describing what is in your head. go slow, step by step to whatever destination you have. I skip steps all the time cause I get bored with myself And I think my writing suffered for it.

As for shy with using the naughty words. Don't use them! Write how you would talk and think. Don't force words into a story just because others use them.

Skillfully playing with Taemin's balls and cock, Jinki slurped and sucked his way past the younger man's asshole and started to tongue his way inside.

vs.

Skillfully playing with Taemin's soft downy hair around his member, Jinki laved his way to the Younger man's entrance and nudged his way inside.

Ehhh. hot is hot! Write what you want to be comfortable!

imvus July 22 2011, 15:41:12 UTC

Thank You So Much. That was my concern along with my only knowledge of boy on boy is from reading fics so it makes it harder and more uncomfortable. But you are so right both are hot. Thank you for that comparison. that helps a whole lot!

Thread 6