My sanity is ebbing.
Everything makes it worse.
I don't want to feel this way anymore.

Retracted ( Read more... )

I can't go back to school in Manhattan unless I can afford to live on my own--which I can't. Mom INSISTS that I apply for housing. Hunter is a commuter college. They house 615 students... She said if I can't get housing, I have to go somewhere else. I didn't apply anywhere else ( Read more... )

At what point in your life do people stop trying to tell you what you should and shouldn't do?

Just curious. Because I'm thinking now would be a good time for that to happen...

I'm feeling extremely insecure lately. I don't know what it is. I just do not feel good about myself. Or my situation. I feel like a social, financial, and emotional drain. I feel like a slave to my mother and a bad role model for my sister. I feel like a complete failure and I haven't even had a chance to do anything ( Read more... )

BLARRRRRGGGGG I'M THE GUILT MONSTER BAARARRRARGALGALG I'M VOMITTING GUILT ALL OVER YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE GUILT FREEEE RARRRRRRAFADFASDF ( Read more... )

There's something about the coldest part of winter that really gives me optimism. I don't know where it comes from. Perhaps it's riding. How all the stress and stagnancy of the fall gets to manifest itself when I go riding. Slicing up some snow always puts me in the best mood. Mmm. I need to find more people who snowboard ( Read more... )

So ( Read more... )

I want to vent to something besides my computer and this fucking livejournal account.

But considering the fact that I can count the people in my life who give a shit and a half on one hand (you could even hack off a couple fingers), that's becoming less and less plausible.

Jess said I look sad. I am sad.

I've decided I need to start working out again.
My stress levels are ridiculous. And it's the only way I know how to get rid of it.