Fic: Shift (Kirk/McCoy)

May 18, 2009 10:19

Title: Shift
Pairing: Kirk/McCoy
Fandom: Star Trek XI (spoilers)
Summary: It almost feels normal
Rating: Adult
Word Count: 3800
A/N: Sequel to Push. Yeah, this seems to have become a series before I realized it. *glares at Jim* It's all his fault. ETA: #3 in the Two Men & a Motorbike Series

It almost feels normal.

Jim didn’t realize just how off everything has been since returning to Earth until this afternoon. Things have been changing, sure, but it takes getting away for a few hours for him to really see it. Even with the itch he feels to get up and move, to do something, he’s felt more at home in his skin. There’s this whole blanket of melancholy that seems to cover Starfleet now, and he isn’t immune to it. Restless and angry seem to be how he spends a majority of his time these days, since returning. Well, when he isn’t aching and confused, but that’s entirely different.

“Should I check out the window for airborne swine?”

“Hmm?” Jim looks over at the doorway and sees Captain Pike smirking at him.

“Jim Kirk lost in thought is something that I never expected to see. I assumed that must mean that pigs were flying,” Pike quips as he is wheeled back into the room. A nurse helps him get back into bed, which is the only reason Jim doesn’t snark back at him. He doesn’t want a witness accusing of being mean to an invalid.

However, once the nurse leaves the room, blushing and twittering after Jim winks at her, he looks at Pike. “Don’t think that your new wheels give you a free pass to be an asshole, old man. It also doesn’t suddenly make you into a comedian, so keep your jokes to yourself.”

Pike settles back against more fluffy pillows than Jim can count at this angle. “Good. I knew that I could count on you not to look at me with pity and sigh like I’m dying.”

Jim snorts. “Affirmative, Captain. Pity’s pointless.”

“Not for long.” Pike looks at the closed door and frowns before looking back at Jim. “I can’t captain a ship with that thing.”

“You’re too stubborn to let that stop you,” Jim says simply. He’s been here for half the day, yet this is the first time that Pike’s started talking about anything except bad hospital food and obscure space facts. It was the thought of this kind of conversation that has kept him from visiting, so he feels a little queasy now that it seems Pike’s ready to have serious talks about shit Jim isn’t good at talking about.

“Being stubborn isn’t always complimentary, Jim. You should listen to that and learn, while you’re young enough for it to possibly have some sort of impact,” Pike tells him. He reaches for a glass of water that’s sitting on a tray by his bed. “They won’t let me captain my ship.”

Jim shifts uncomfortably and looks at the wheelchair. He can’t imagine being stuck in that thing, dependent on it for movement, but he’s really doing his best not to let Pike see that distaste. After all, he’s partially to blame for Pike being like this. If he’d just been faster, better, smarter, well, things might have been different.

“It’s alright, Jim. I’ve had nearly two weeks to get used to it.” Pike sucks on the straw before he puts the glass back. “I’m alive, even if I’m not entirely in one piece anymore. Losing my ship is a small price to pay for keeping my life.”

“How can it be alright, Sir? I can’t even imagine losing that much. I’d rather be dead,” Jim says before he can stop himself. It’s honest, but probably too honest.

Pike chuckles. “You’re still young, Jim. You’ll understand one day, I hope.”

He grimaces. “Doubt it. Getting old won’t change me that much, I figure.”

Pike looks as if he’s about to go into lecture mode, an expression that Jim’s learned well since their first meeting, but it’s a relief when he doesn’t. Instead, he looks at Jim and asks, “How are you doing?”

“You’ve asked me that four times already. I’m starting to get offended since you must think I’m lying,” Jim tells him. “I’m doing okay. Highs and lows. You know how it is.”

“Yeah, I do. That’s why I keep asking.” Pike smiles wryly. “Your face looks like you’ve been hitting the bars again or, more accurately, as if the bars have been hitting you.”

“You don’t have to worry about me, Captain. It’s just some bruises. Besides, women seem to like them.” He grins and does his best to look smug despite the fact that he hasn’t been with a woman since before going into space. Has it really been that long? Oddly enough, he hasn’t noticed. Not with Bones around.

Pike is silent and just stares until Jim starts to worry that maybe they teach mind-reading somehow in super secret captain classes. He hopes not because he’s thinking about Bones, and he doubts that Pike wants to have visions of him on his knees sucking Bones’ cock, even if it’d be really hot. How could it not be?

“My recommendation is that the Federation should appoint you as my successor.” Pike studies him, as if waiting for a reply. Jim isn’t entirely sure that he understands what was just said, so he doesn’t say anything. “I have no guarantees that they’ll take my suggestion into consideration, but I’ve done what I can to insure that my ship will be in capable hands.”

“Thank you, Captain.” It isn’t the right thing to say, he’s sure, but he isn’t entirely sure that there is a right thing to say in this situation. This gives some validity to the rumors that he’s heard around the Academy, but he still can’t believe it. He’s not even finished with school, technically, and there’s the cheating allegation hanging over his head, not to mention the more qualified people who should be ahead of him in whatever ‘to be a captain’ line there is around Starfleet.

“Don’t thank me, son. You’ve earned it.” Pike smirks. “Now, get out of here so I can get some rest without having to listen to you flirt with my nurses.”

“Yes, Sir.” He stands up and shakes Pike’s hand firmly before he leaves the hospital room. He winks at Pike’s nurse as he walks past and is satisfied to see her blush and giggle. He hasn’t lost his touch, even if he hasn’t been practicing much lately.

When he gets to the parking lot, he just sits for a few minutes. “Think it’s time for a good, hard ride, Jess,” he murmurs before he starts the bike. He roars out of the parking lot and starts driving in the opposite direction of the Academy. He isn’t ready to go back yet. His meeting with Pike has his mind bouncing all over the place, and the slightly comforting feeling of having a somewhat normal afternoon is totally gone.

By the time he gets back to campus, it’s already the next morning. He had to stop to get gas a few hours ago, and he grabbed a sandwich from a cooler at the station. Except for that, he hasn’t eaten anything else since breakfast. He didn’t really think much about hunger while driving, but he’s starving now that he’s home. Fortunately, there’s some leftover pizza waiting for him.

By the time he gets up to his room, he isn’t thinking about anything except crawling into bed. His head hurts, and he’s been thinking too damn much. He enters his room and shuts the door. He jumps when his light suddenly switches on. “Bones?”

“Where the hell have you been, Jim?” Bones is sitting on his bed and looks angry.

“I went for a ride. Needed to clear my head,” he says, trying to determine if he should be annoyed that Bones is in his room questioning him like he’s some kid out after curfew. “What are you doing here?”

“A ride until one in the morning?” Bones stands up and glares. “I’ve been worried about you, asshole. When you didn’t show up at my place tonight, I came here and you were gone.”

It’s been a couple of days since their fight and the aftermath. Jim has tried to give Bones space, which hasn’t been easy at all, yet he’s trying not to make things weird between them. The friendship is what matters most, more than fucking, hard as that is to imagine. Having Bones hiding in the dark and practically attacking him for not reporting his location, however, is really damn annoying. The lines keep getting blurred until Jim doesn’t think they even exist anymore, which makes it all the more messed up.

Jim leans against his door and frowns. “What do you mean when I didn’t show up? I didn’t know that I was supposed to report to you.”

“It’s Monday. You always show up at my place with a six pack and bitch at me about Mondays sucking until I end up making you food to shut you up.” Bones frowns. “You rarely miss a free meal Monday, you asshole, so, yeah, I was worried.”

“Wait. You’re here skulking in the dark and scaring the hell out of me because I didn’t come over for an unplanned dinner? Seriously?” Jim considers it. “I didn’t come by last week, either. Remember? You had work or meetings or some other excuse anytime I tried to see you.”

“Damn it, Jim. I thought we’d decided to move past all that,” Bones says. “Best friends and all that shit, remember?”

“I can’t believe that you’re trying to pick a fight over something that wasn’t even planned,” Jim admits. “I’ve had a long day, and I’m really not in the mood to try to have a conversation with you right now. We can do this tomorrow.” He pulls his shirt over his head and throws it on the floor. “I’m going to bed. You can see yourself out.”

As he walks past Bones, he isn’t surprised when a hand reaches out and grabs his arm. He tells himself that he didn’t walk so close purposely, but he’s lying and knows it. Even with everything going on in his head, he can’t stay away from Bones. He looks to the side and can see that Bones is angry. For once, he doesn’t give a fuck because he’s tired of feeling like the only one making any effort.

“I’m not going anywhere, Jim. Where have you been?” Bones tightens his grip on Jim’s arm. “Out fucking some whore you picked up at the bar?”

“What if I have been?” Jim asks, deliberately provoking now that he realizes Bones sounds jealous. That has to mean something, doesn’t it? Bones was never jealous before. He licks his lips. “Might even still have the taste on my tongue.”

“You bastard,” Bones growls before he shoves Jim onto the bed. “I was worried about you, and you’re out getting laid?” Bones stares down at him and narrows his eyes. “No, you weren’t, you asshole. You’re lying.”

“Why does it matter, Bones? We’re just friends who got off together a couple of times,” he says, annoyed at himself for not being able to sound blasé about it all.

“It just does, you brat.” Bones is breathing hard, and he’s flushed, probably with anger but Jim hopes it’s something else. “That’s all it is to you then? Well, fuck you, Jim.”

“No, fuck you, Leonard.” He doesn’t look away from Bones’ face. There’s something there that he can’t identify, and it’s mesmerizing even if he has no idea what it is exactly.

“Fuck you,” Bones snarls as he lowers himself to the bed. He kisses Jim hard, pulling his hair as he deepens the kiss. When he pulls back, he bites Jim’s lip hard before sucking it into his mouth. “Fuck you.”

“Then do it,” he challenges, reaching up to push Bones’ shirt up. “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? To fuck me?”

Bones slaps his hands away and pulls his shirt off, throwing it to the side before he leans down again. “Stop trying to provoke me, kid,” he warns before he kisses Jim again. It’s the first time that they’ve been like this, lying together half naked, and it’s amazing.

“I like provoking you, Doc.” He smirks and moves his hand down Bones’ back. “You’re so damn hot.” He leans up and licks a nipple, scraping his teeth over it as he keeps stroking Bones’ back.

“You’re just jealous that I’m prettier than you,” Bones mutters before he shifts and pins Jim to the mattress. He stares at Jim’s chest and moves his hand along the bare skin. His touch is almost hesitant, which is a contradiction to how forceful he’s been in their other encounters.

“You only wish you were as pretty as I am,” Jim murmurs, arching up towards Bones’ hand to seek more contact. “Don’t be scared, Bones. You’re the one who likes to bite.”

Bones’ gaze snaps up to look at him. “Fuck you, Jim. I’m not scared, especially not of you.” He brushes his thumb against Jim’s nipple firmly, as if trying to prove that he isn’t uncertain about doing this with a man. Jim considers admitting his own lack of experience, but he doesn’t really want to waste time talking.

“Prove it,” he says instead, which probably isn’t the wisest thing to say to a pissed off Bones but, well, he’s never been smart when it comes to his own well-being so why start now?

“You’re not going to win this, Jim,” Bones says stubbornly. If this leads to more sex, Jim doesn’t really get how he can possibly lose, but he lets Bones think whatever he wants. Bones leans down and licks his nipple. It’s strange to be doing this indoors, with lights on, where they can see each other. Jim likes it, though, even if he thinks it’s hot to fuck outside, too.

“I’m not some fragile woman, Bones. I’m not gonna break, and I don’t need foreplay,” he points out, trying to sound smug but mostly sounding a little desperate. He thrusts his hips up against Bones to indicate just how unnecessary foreplay is.

“I think I like it better when you shut the hell up,” Bones mutters, looking up with a glare. “Don’t make me gag you, Jim.”

“What? You gonna gag me with your co--ow!” His smart ass remark turns into a cry of surprise when Bones suddenly squeezes his cock. Hard.

“Warned you,” Bones says with a smug smile before he goes back to driving Jim insane with licks and nibbles all over his bare skin.

Since he has no intention of letting Bones think that he’s some submissive kid, Jim bucks up and catches his off-balance enough to roll them over. “My turn,” he announces before he leans over and starts to suck on Bones’ neck.

“Fuck.”

“Very observant, Bones.”

“Go to hell.” Bones grips his shoulders and rolls them back over. Kirk’s leg almost falls off the bed, but he manages to keep his balance. Bones doesn’t notice the close call, or doesn’t care, because he’s back to nibbling on Jim’s neck. Bones moves his hands lower, fumbling with the button on Jim’s jeans until he finally gets them unfastened.

“Bones, you don’t have to…” Jim is hard and ready for more, but he doesn’t know if Bones is ready for this. Sure, he got to his knees and started sucking that first night without any fear, but he’s always been pretty brash and reckless. Bones is cautious and worries too much about every thing under the sun.

“I don’t have to do anything, Jim,” Bones says simply before he pushes Jim’s jeans down. Jim thinks he might come now, just from the thought of what Bones is doing, but he doesn’t want to embarrass himself too badly. He curls his fingers into the blanket beneath him and keeps staring down at Bones, who is staring at his cock.

“Damn it, Bones. Do something,” he finally whines when Bones just keeps staring. His cock twitches when he feels warm breath against it, and he has to bite his lip to keep from laughing when Bones jerks back.

“Shut the fuck up, Jim,” Bones growls despite the fact that Jim didn’t even say anything. Surly bastard. Jim’s glare disappears when Bones suddenly engulfs his cock, taking too much at once. He arches his hips up instinctively, which causes Bones to pull back and cough. “Are you trying to kill me, you asshole?”

“Think you’re trying to kill me,” Jim mutters, fully aware that he’s pouting as he rolls his hips up. “More. Now.”

“Demanding bastard. Stop talking.” Bones grips his cock and lowers his head again. This time, he doesn’t take so much into his mouth. Plus, he puts his free hand on Jim’s hip and holds it tightly to keep him from bucking up. Bones always has been a quick learner.

Jim’s eyes roll back as he thrusts up slightly and fucks Bones’ mouth. It’s not even in the top twenty blow jobs that he’s received, but it’s the best one because Bones is doing it for him. Bones is here because he was worried, and he’s sucking his cock somewhere that isn’t a dark back alley or shoulder of a road and that means a lot more than technique and skill. It doesn’t take him long before he’s coming. He tries to warn Bones, but there isn’t time. Bones pulls back, come dripping from his lip, and he stares up at Jim looking so sexy that it’s almost disgusting.

“God, you’re sexy,” Jim whispers before he can stop himself. Bones ducks his head but Jim can see the slight smile, which means it’s okay. He didn’t sound like some emotional woman like he feared. Or, if he did, Bones didn’t care.

“Of course I am,” Bone drawls as he crawls up Jim’s body. The accent is more pronounced after sex, Jim’s noticed. He wants to hear it more often, especially since it might mean sex. When Bones kisses him, he can taste himself, which is really hot. Women who suck him off either don’t swallow or never kiss him after. Bones doesn’t seem to care about it.

He moves his hand down and slides it into Bones’ pants, stroking his cock as they kiss. It doesn’t take long before Bones is grunting and spilling all over his hand. He keeps stroking until Bones grips his wrist and tugs. He smiles lazily and removes his hand, bringing it up so he can suck his fingers while staring at Bones.

“Fucking incorrigible,” Bones mutters, licking his lips before he rolls over onto his back.

Jim lies down beside him and looks at the ceiling. He isn’t really sure what to do now. The other two times, they’ve had these brief moments where they might get caught, so it’s been rushed without any awkward ‘after’ shit to deal with. When he’s fucked women, he never does it at his place, so he can leave after. He doesn’t feel that instinctive need to leave now, though, which scares him.

“I didn’t come here for this,” Bones admits in a gruff tone. “I’m trying to keep our friendship separate, like you asked, so I was just worried.”

“I wasn’t out fucking anyone else,” Jim tells him, even though he figures Bones already knows that. “Haven’t wanted to, with anyone else.”

He can feel Bones staring at him when the mattress moves slightly. “Yeah?” Bones asks.

“Yeah,” he confirms, rolling his head to the side so that he can look at Bones. He’s probably blushing since this whole ‘after sex’ talk is making him sound pathetic. “Went to the hospital where they’ve got the captain. Needed to take Jessica out for a ride after.”

“Damn.” Bones seems to understand without Jim even having to explain how the hospital made him feel and how it was seeing Pike stuck depending on a bunch of strangers and stuck in that chair. Jim closes his eyes slightly when Bones moves his fingers across his forehead, brushing his damp hair back.

“It is what it is,” Jim murmurs. “Can talk about it more tomorrow.”

“You? Talk?” Bones pulls his hand away and rolls over onto his back again. “That’s something new, unless it’s just talking out of your ass.”

“Fuck you.” Jim rolls his eyes and reaches onto the floor by the bed. He opens the pizza box from last night and grabs one of the remaining slices, not caring that it’s cold. He takes a bite and moans in appreciation of the food.

“Did you just get that off the floor? Damn it, Jim. You don’t know what could have gotten into that box when it’s down there. It’s not sanitary at all.”

“Don’t care. Tastes good. ‘sides, I’ve got you if I need a doctor.” He smirks before taking another bite. He doesn’t look at Bones as he says, “Can stay, if you want.”

He can hear Bones inhale, which probably means he’s said the wrong thing. Too much, too fast. Hell, this is the first time they’ve even got partially naked, and they’re still mostly clothed, and here he is offering to let Bones spend the night like they’re together or something. Way to screw things up again.

“I have to be at the hospital early tomorrow. Real early. Probably better get home so I can sleep, actually.” Bones is practically stammering, which would make Jim laugh if it didn’t hurt quite so much. He can suck his cock but he can’t share a bed. If things go back to like they were because of his pathetic offer, he’s going to scream.

“Right. Need your beauty sleep, if you ever want to be as pretty as I am,” Jim says, trying to keep his tone light and teasing.

Bones snorts. “You’re not as pretty as you think you are, Jim.” He rolls off the bed and picks up his shirt from the floor. Jim looks away before Bones can notice that he’s watching him. “We’ll talk tomorrow. Okay?”

“Yeah, sure. If you’re nice, you can even cook me dinner.” He shifts and gives Bones his most unaffected smirk. He even adds a wink in his attempts to act like he’s fine and everything’s just great.

“Well, there goes that idea. Nice is for little kids and Chekov. Might make you dinner anyway, though,” Bones says as he pulls his shirt over his head. He looks down at his damp and rumpled pants and makes a face. “I, uh, I’ll just use the bathroom then I’ll go.”

“Alright.” Jim watches him enter the bathroom and reaches down for another slice of cold pizza. He lies back and does his best to not to think about anything, especially Bones and sex and scary fucking changes to relationships.

End

#2: Push | #4: Run

rating: adult, two men & a motorbike series, all my fanfiction, pairing: kirk/mccoy, 2009 fanfic, fandom: star trek xi

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