am i a bad person?

[infernal_allure]

i chose not to go to my uncles funeral today. the last few funerals i went to ...those memories are engrained in my mind forever. i think ive come to the point where i dont need that kind of closure, i really just want to hold on to the precious memories i do have and keep those and not have that hanging over my head. now im starting to wonder if

Comments

[benmonkey]

You're not a bad person. I've been to too many funerals that only made things more depressing and desperate for me.. but there have been others where I was really glad I went.

I had a friend in high school who I'd met only a week before he killed himself. I didn't know him very well by that point, but I had a feeling we were going to be really great friends. I had almost decided not to go to his funeral, but friends convinced me that I would regret it if I hadn't gone. They turned out to be right.. I saw a lot of other friends who I didn't even know had been friends with this guy. That was the last time I cried in front of a crowd of strangers, but it really helped me cope with things.

On the other hand, there have been other funerals that I knew I would get no real closure from. I'm glad I didn't attend those.