Comments | infp_v2: Am I the only one that does this? Is this weird?

heart_over_head in infp_v2

Am I the only one that does this? Is this weird?

Feb 03, 2008 00:06

Even if I'm not easily read, I try to convince myself that I am easily read for moral improvement. I try to tell myself that people can see through my true feelings. This gets me to be more genuine ( Read more... )

Comments 7

jeroentiggelman February 3 2008, 11:47:20 UTC

I think I get it.

I am probably less "nice" in general, but I do understand giving a surface indication of acceptance while not really liking someone('s opinions) that much. I don't think I actually try to let that come across as a matter of genuine like, so I am absolutely fine when someone notices that the acceptance is only on a superficial level. Doing this consciously, I don't feel fake unless people try to manipulate me into saying things that are not at all heart-felt. (I am rather allergic to that, and probably won't play along very far.)

On another note, I think both seeing the good in people and being generally nicer for that reason is in general a good thing (in reasonable moderation). I do try to some extent.

--Jeroen (INTJ)

reasonjo February 4 2008, 00:06:50 UTC

I think I used to do that when I was younger (teens & early 20's). I don't do it anymore. If I don't like someone I don't like them. I don't scream "I don't like you!" from the treetops, but I don't go out of my way to be anything more than civilly polite to them.

rajenath February 4 2008, 07:24:57 UTC

*shrug* I'm polite to just about everyone, but I only try to act like I like someone if I actually like them. It's not my fault if someone can't figure out that I'm being polite, not friendly.

I do the nod-and-smile semi-agreement thing sometimes, but it's an extension of the politeness. It's not actually a fake friendship.

andrewjvb February 4 2008, 19:47:01 UTC

I definitely get it. Sometimes I feel I have been left an empty, dull, shell of a person because of it.

I believe that everyone is lovable, or admirable, interesting, in some way. So it seems like it's a failure on my part, or its small of me, if I can't love everyone, or at least not hate anyone. Now it's hard to tell anymore what hate is, or at least I don't want to let it in. Repression!

katexas February 20 2008, 06:10:40 UTC

I have definitely behaved in a friendly way with people I didn't actually get along with very well.

People who thought that we should be friends but made me feel uncomfortable. People whose opinion I didn't really value and who didn't really seem to respect me and who thought they could insult me, boss me around, and then take me out for coffee. I could do a decent job of just talking to them for a few minutes and trying to talk about the kinds of things we could "get along" about, but ultimately I did not feel good or genuine about it. Like you said, I felt like a fake. But I do think that most people have at least a few good qualities and most of the time would rather try to get along than fight. Especially if we have to work together.