Stupid no LJ app for Apple anymore bullshit ( Read more... )

That one proper conversation has my brain addled. Still. Maybe always. All the “what if?” rolling around my mind. The future threads and possibilities. That and a gnawing desire to speak again. Stopping myself hour after hour from reaching out. Really? So dramatic I know. That’s how it is when it’s the thing that everyone goes on about it seems.

Today I make waffles for the first time. I’ve looked forward to this day for a long while. Silly, but true. R wouldn’t let me get a waffle maker … I finally defied and am going to embrace my happiness one waffle at a time.

Adulting is hard. How the fuck am I nearly 40?! Writing proposals and contacting commercial real estate people and just generally having to be on top of shit, I thought I would feel more prepared by the time I was old. I still feel like a bit of an imposter. Just the usual.

I will do this. I can do this.

Here I am.

That’s it, all that really matters. Found again. Not lost anymore.

Connection is everything. Those few I have it with, the ones from the past especially, are work to maintain. Even connections that I know will always be there do require attention. The different directions and experiences shape us differently but it’s all about finding common ground. The same shit is said by different people time after time. Very ( Read more... )

It’s utterly bizarre to be brought back to this site so many years later and read the frequently miserable as fuck outpourings I’ve left here. Makes me feel pretty uncomfortable at points, but thankfully I got reminded that “we were so young”. It’s ok to be dumb as fuck when you’re learning your way. Maybe not everyone has to go through that to get ( Read more... )

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http://blog.myspace.com/sooomi

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