OMG!!! OMG!!! 1) It's fantastic. I'm falling in love with your characters and I'm sad there are only 5 parts. :( 2)you say "I know that Craig’s a police officer and he works in narcotics mostly," and am I reading it wrong or should there be a word like "father" in there? I know Craig and Ryan are Teens. 3) ::puppy eyes:: More?
GAH. hi, i haven't commented on the last three cos i just discovered this today and read it one-shot! 1. it's awesome! ryan's voice speaks very much like a friend of mine. he even talks to himself the same way, too. :p 2. i like the way that it's very believable. i read some comments that said ryan thinks way too much, but. i didn't even notice that because heck, i think that's quite normal. for me, that is.
i'm not a very good critic, especially when i'm all dazzled by the story- so i'll just be waiting for the final part, :D
It's alright! I'm glad you like the story so far and yeah Ryan's thoughts can get a bit overwhelming but one thing I've tried to do is keep it realistic. I have these little monologues going through my head ALL the time, srsly.
My friend Ryan, whom this is actually based on is slightly less crazier and hecka possessive so yeah, he'd've ripped out Sophie's eyes if she so much as looked in Craig's direction but then we wouldn't have a story XP.
Last part will be a long part in coming simply cos I have yet to write it and I have no idea how I'll finish this.
Heh thanks. The only reason I did was cos this chapter was floating along in my hard disk. Next update will take donkey years, I predict. I'm glad you like it :).
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1) It's fantastic. I'm falling in love with your characters and I'm sad there are only 5 parts. :(
2)you say "I know that Craig’s a police officer and he works in narcotics mostly," and am I reading it wrong or should there be a word like "father" in there? I know Craig and Ryan are Teens.
3) ::puppy eyes:: More?
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And omg yes! Thanks for pointing it out XD!
More.... maaaybe when I get the time to write it >.>.
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1. it's awesome! ryan's voice speaks very much like a friend of mine. he even talks to himself the same way, too. :p
2. i like the way that it's very believable. i read some comments that said ryan thinks way too much, but. i didn't even notice that because heck, i think that's quite normal. for me, that is.
i'm not a very good critic, especially when i'm all dazzled by the story- so i'll just be waiting for the final part, :D
Reply
My friend Ryan, whom this is actually based on is slightly less crazier and hecka possessive so yeah, he'd've ripped out Sophie's eyes if she so much as looked in Craig's direction but then we wouldn't have a story XP.
Last part will be a long part in coming simply cos I have yet to write it and I have no idea how I'll finish this.
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i love ryan's snarky voice...makes me giggle
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