There are in life just a handful of souls that we will meet that will force us to the very edge of reason and understanding. John was one of those for me. A great and dear friend. I talked to him last night and finally had some closure on my whole Ohio experience. If nothing but one thing came of that horrible year it was John. I can't ( Read more... )

So, today I'm going to say it. I'm sorry. I f#&$ed up. and I'm really sorry. I'm sorry to Mandy for betraying her trust. Sorry to Josh for hurting him so deeply. Sorry for failing and giving in to a weaker emotion. I'm sorry. This isn't my official apology. You know I wouldn't do that on here. I will apologize to you in person. I just ( Read more... )

Well, I went to the air show with my family yesterday. Can't even begin to say how big of a mistake that was. Between the rumbling through the ground into my brain, the sun beating down on us, and the noise I thought I was gonna start throwing up everywhere. I was sweating and shaking I was in so much pain. But my aunt and uncle were in with my ( Read more... )

Josh says that I have to start writing about this disease I have otherwise I'm going to kill someone, so I did, and I'm going to put it in here. Originally I wrote it in my pain journal, a journal that sounds exactly as it is, I keep daily track on a scale of 1-10 (1 being tolerable and 10 being pain beyond anything I can imagine) and whether it ( Read more... )

Tonight I had dinner with Josh and Mandy. It was the first time in a long time that my head ache took a back seat and stayed put. I laughed and laughed and we had a good time. These two people who know me best I've let slip the farthest away and tonight I just realized how much I've missed them being close to me. Even if it's just a ten minute ( Read more... )