Improving Writing Style

[instigator_ash]

So. I'm a girl character written by a boy. All my posts are written first-person, too, which means what you're reading is my inner voice. Well, my inner voice sounds like a boy, and that's bad 'cause it ruins the suspension of disbelief. I'm going to be working on that in the next few weeks, assuming I get any screen time. *pokes Zach*

Here's the "

Comments

[chiave_trust]

On the flip side, guys notice more things; technical details, for example, though Ash being a Largoist would be learning how to remember said details more too.

[instigator_ash]

... If I ever spend four paragraphs describing a weapon or vehicle, just shoot me.

[chiave_trust]

Trust me, I will. Or Kit will.

Yes. Kit will kill it with fire.

[instigator_ash]

Or a martial arts technique.

Or a secret organization made entirely of NPCs.

Or a set of magic powers.

[sareth]

The Kit is wise. Listen to the Kit.

A big thing to remember is that these are statistical tendencies. They *can* be overdone, and as you say, Ash is a FANATIC. She has license/excuse/reason to NOT stick with these SUGGESTIONS. Yes, she could be more girly, but she manages a fairly decent job of being a tom-boy-ish Girl.

Hell of a much better job than Saeko. (Of course, Saeko has an excuse, too...)

Oh, and Saeko insists I pass on her comment to Erden's thoughts about you...

"Pfft! Viiiiiiiirgin!"