The Ashleigh Legacy | Gen. 3.1.
Archive | ✖ Bad words, occasional naked pixels, and general disregard for the status quo.
Last time: Scarlett and Sasha forced and emotionally manipulated their way moved in with Von and Dai. Scarlett became a mighty firestarter and Sasha became a lusty caveman. Scarlett started sneaking into Von's bed after he'd gone to sleep and Sasha met Gold, a girl who was maybe even more awful than she was. It was love at first sight. The girls had their Young Adult birthdays, and then Sasha and Gold eloped in the kitchen before moving out and taking Wonton with them. When they finally had some privacy, Von knocked up Scarlett in the shower like the true romancer he is.
Aww, yeah. For the ladies and the gentlemen of that persuasion.
Von: I'm just going to brood out this window for a few- what the hell, Dai? I JUST RAKED THOSE. #hardknocklife
Dai: I'm just organizing them.
He also had a puking girlfriend to deal with.
Graduation stuff happened.
Naturally she wins at smart.
Naturally she wins at being a horrible beast. ♥
Nice jacket, Kash. You look like a doucheface. Oh, also, you are a doucheface for breaking up with Kristin.
Kash: Eat me.
MY WORD. Your dad would be so proud of you.
I honestly have no idea what they were arguing about. I think I was watching the sky or something and came back to this display of maturity and adult-ness.
Scarlett: Oh dear! Is something happening to the sky? I've noticed the colors leaking. Is the moon cracking? Are the colorful oceans seeping out and coming to drown us all?
Scarlett: I'll fight the moon. Don't worry!
Von: Yes you will, sweetheart.
That's a supportive man you have there, Scarlett.
Scarlett needed to check the sky for herself, and after tasting the water and determining it to just be rain, she dragged Von to the bookstore for what she called "secret supplies for the upcoming event."
Von: I want to taste the sky, too.
Scarlett: It's all over, baby.
Von opted to stay outside and nose into the middle of an argument between a vampire named Avery and this nice young lady, Bailey.
Von: Maybe she doesn't mind if you're different. Maybe she loves you, anyway.
Avery: Um... thank you?
Bailey: [exaggerated sigh]
Kaz. ♥
Kaz: I'm not euphoric. I'm dirt poor and can't afford a shower. This is great.
Avery: Hey, man, there's this cute little blonde slice running around showing people your picture on her cellphone. I think she thinks you're missing.
Von: What-?
Scarlett: Oh, thank the stars! I didn't recognize your from behind! I only have a photograph of your front.
Von: Right-.
Scarlett: The books in the bookstore told me the truth of the secret I've been carrying in my belly. We're going to have a baby!
Von: I-... uh-... we... whoa.
Avery: Good aim, bro.
Scarlett: It's amazing!
Von: I've always wanted children. I just never expected it to happen so quickly.
Scarlett: I did. I've been keeping track of my ovulation since the first time we met. I had faith that one day I would catch you in an amorous enough mood that you'd do me without protection, and you did!
Bailey: Why can't you be romantic like her?! God!
Avery: ...
Von: I'm choosing to take that as a compliment.
Scarlett: Of course it is. You know I've loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you...
Von: I love you, too.
Scarlett: !!!
The fact that everyone in this scene is dripping wet just makes it so much better idk.
Von: I've been waiting for the right time... I know I've been really difficult lately, seemingly of two minds on things, but in reality I've just been fighting myself so hard, forcing myself to wait until you were old enough...
Scarlett: For what? Cunnilingus?
Von: Well, yes, that, as well, but that's not why I'm down here right now right now.
Von: Scarlett Ashleigh, will you do me the honor of marrying me and being my wife?
Von: I picked the shiniest one for you. I know how much you love-
Scarlett: I love shiny things! Oh, Von!
Scarlett: Yes! Yes! A thousand times, yes!
The obsession runs deep.
And then Abigal, here? Avery's sister? She ruined it. Way to go, Abby.
And then my Simself ruined it even more by going into labor. What a ho. Seriously. She's had, like, half a dozen boyfriends. I don't even know who her babydaddy is.
Scarlett: OMG.
Dai: OMG.
Collie: OMG.
Anya: I'm still thinking the red wine with the pork, tho. Not the white. It has a berry reduction- oh, shit, I mean OMG.
Reece: Don't worry, ladies. If that baby pops out here I'll punch it right back in.
Jay: Dude, what if you splatter baby-sack on us?
Scarlett: WHAT IF YOU SPLATTER BABY-SACK ON US!
Oh, Chris. He's her no. 1 stalker. Nice one.
Dai's decided to bust her mad skillz on finding a suitor. She's a total sexbomb flirt-machine. Watch out, fellas.
Dai: Um. Hello.
Reece: Hey.
SMOKIN' CHEMISTRY AMIRITE?
Reece: You're not about to flirt with me, are you? Because I'm taken. Like, balls-in-a-vice, taken.
Dai: Oh. Well, that sounds... awful.
Reece: Hey! Don't judge me or my alternative lifestyle. It's the lifestyle that I've chosen!
Dai: I wasn't-! I just thought...
Dai: Words don't work in my mouth right now. Sorry. Nevermind. Bye.
Reece: Prissy bitch.
Scarlett decided to have her fortune told by her sister, because setting up in a fake gypsy caravan in the alley back behind a bookstore is totally legit. It's not at all legit.
Scarlett: Sasha.
Sasha: Scarlett.
Sasha: "Welcome to my parlor," said the spider to the fly-
Scarlett: You're dumb.
Sasha: No you.
And then Sasha ripped her own pregnant sister off for this piece of shit bunk fortune. We're all so proud of you, Sasha bb.
OH LOOK WHO IT IS.
Kristin: Uuhh... hi. Shit.
And this must be... Kash's... daughter..? Jacqueline, or something. Damn, kid. You're not even remotely cute, are you?
Kristin: I did everything you asked! I even left my husband as a sacrifice to the weather horse gods! So why?! Why is my child so hideously pudding-faced?!
Wild Horses: THIS IS MY DESIGN.
Meanwhile, Dai broke the TV and had an unholy fit about it.
She took her rage out on the gnomes.
Manchu: Man, she's coming! She's coming!
David: Just be cool, dude. Just chill.
Dai: *kick*
Manchu: Be cool, he says! Chill, he says!
David: Get your crotch out of my face. I'm trying to look up her skirt.
She just really wants a man, okay? So she swallowed her pride and went to some weird equestrian lovers meet-up thing even though she's terrified of horses and hates the smell of all things horse-related.
Kash was there with his hideous spawn, but he manages to make her look cute.
Kash: I decided to join the military in an attempt to look more manly.
It failed, boo.
TARGET: ACQUIRED. - set sights on: victim.
Adam Armstrong.
Adam: Please tell me I'm not the only one that came here expecting a little more metaphor and a little less literal 'pony play'? Heh heh.
Dai: (Oh my god is everyone in this city kinky?) Oh... ha ha yeah.
Adam: You want to grab that rope and test out the lasso with me?
Dai: I.... think.... I might want to, yes......
And then vampire Richie (Avery and Abigal's other sibling) had to go and get struck by lightning like the diva attention whore he is.
Richie: Can I just walk like an Egyptian now?
Of course you can, brain scramble.
So classy, Dai. Losing your virginity to a manwhore in an army tent in a stable yard in the rain.
Oh! And right while one of his flings was having his baby. (He was also dating my Simself at the same time Dai hit that, homewrecker.)
Richie: BOO YOU WHORE.
Dai: I am! I'm such a whore! Oh no, I'm going to be branded forever. And you weren't even that good! You're all such awful perverts... I can't believe I came here!
Adam: Oh no you did not.
And then he slapped the shit out of her. And it was hilarious. But I forgot to cap it because my face was seriously 8DDD
Dai: ...wow. That... actually felt kind of amazing. Exhilarating, even. I felt a little tingle down south, if you know what I mean. Want to go again?
Adam: Wut.
Adam: Number one turn-off on the list; weird hypocrite virgins. I'm out of here.
Dai: But I'm not a virgin anymore, thanks to you!
Adam: Nope. Done. Bye bye.
And so Dai went home and flirted with her new-found masochism by feeding LuLu.
Scarlett was practicing her charisma in the mirror.
As well as, apparently, her David Blaine-esque levitation.
Scarlett: The Guardian lets me stand on his back so I can see myself in the mirror.
OH, OKAY THEN.
Scarlett: Oooohhh, ooowwwie. Maybe I shouldn't have eaten leftover cake at every meal for the past four days in a row.
Von: That's the baby. THAT'S THE BABY, LOVE. THAT'S- THAT'S-... I think I need a Valium.
So Von went to lie down, curled up in the fetal position on the bed, whimpering about how they don't have any baby furniture yet and how the pregnancy was a day shorter than it should have been, because it was and it was fucking weird, but oh well. I've got your back, Von.
Scarlett: Alas, only one. Does that mean I have to be pregnant again?
Yep.
Scarlett: That's fine. As long as my next baby looks just like this one.
OH OKAY HOW ABOUT NO.
That thing got aged up asap because wtf. Anyway, meet Winter Ashleigh (named after the Tori Amos song). She has Scarlett's eyes and hair, but the rest of her is all Von.
Genius . Excitable | Mac & Cheese . Chinese . Purple
You have to go down some time, Von. Go and meet her.
Von: ...
Guest Sims:
Dáiríne Cormyth by hopeless_sims
Gold Iridescence by awesimz
Adam Armstrong by pocketfulofpixels