[Fic] You Stole My Heart Chapter 5- Part 2
Title: You Stole My Heart Ch5/? Part 2
Part 1
Shit, Ueda thinks with a sigh he knew Kame couldn’t handle the alcohol.
“Ueda, a little help here?” Jin wheezes out from under Kame as he takes all of his weight. Ueda helps Jin with Kame pushing him gently backwards so he’s sitting in his own chair again. His head lolling to the side.
This is not the first time Ueda has seen Kame in this position, when they were younger Kame used to pass out all the time from snorting cocaine. Ueda would find him unconscious at Koki’s place, where they used to hang out with a bunch of their friends. Koki who was too high himself to notice that Kame was well and truly gone, would just leave the boy lying there on the floor. Ueda was the one who always looked after Kame, who always took him back home to face Kame’s father’s wrath.
Jin looks really concerned as he comes around the table and sits down next to Kame and brushing Kame’s hair back from his face.
“Is he going to be okay?” Jin asks not taking his eyes of the boy
“He will be fine” Ueda replys sounding resigned
“How can you say he will be fine! Look at him he’s passed out cold” Jin accuses
“Well it’s not my fault this happened. What did you say to him to make him so upset?” Ueda fires back, clearly suggesting that this is all Jin’s fault.
“You didn’t mention anything about us did you?” Ueda doesn’t know what he’ll do if Kame finds out he’s been sleeping around.
“Of course not” Jin says taken aback. “Why would I mention anything like that to him”
In that moment Ueda knows that Jin is ashamed of what they did too, that he would never have slept with Ueda if he had of known that he was friends with Kame. Ueda thinks again about what type of relationship Jin and Kame actually have. It seems to Ueda that Jin has stronger feelings than friendship towards Kame.
“We were talking about some things that happened in the past and he just got really angry all of a sudden. I didn’t expect it at all” Jin explains leaving out the details. He doesn’t think that he should be the one to explain this to Ueda. If Kame wants him to know Kame can tell him himself. Ueda looks at Jin who is still stoking the boy’s hair.
“Oh” is all the response Jin gets
“we need to take him home” Jin states
Ueda shakes his head. “No, we can’t take him home not like this….his father would skin us alive….and I’m not exaggerating” Ueda says in a serious voice that makes Jin believe him immediately. After what Jin just found out about Kame’s father it doesn’t surprise him at all that Ueda is not welcome in the house. It seems that Kame’s father dislikes all of Kame’s friends.
“Ok” Jin agrees “let’s take him back to my place then”
“No, mine. He will feel better if he wakes up in familiar surroundings”
Jin agrees to get Kame up off his seat while Ueda goes and finds the girls they had been with earlier. He has to tell them they are leaving.
“Kame…Kame” Jin says lightly shaking him, trying to rouse Kame from unconsciousness.
“ummmmm…….” Kame gives an inaudible groan
“Kame, you need to let me help you get up”
“ummmm…..”Kame mumbles again opening his eyes slightly “Jin, I don’t think you should touch me…..it’s not a good idea”
Jin has no idea what Kame is mumbling about as he places his arm around Kame’s waist supporting him.
“Don’t be silly, you can hardly stand” Jin says, grunting under Kame’s weight.
“ummm…..” Kame moans again sounding resigned. Well at least he’s semi-conscious Jin thinks with a sigh.
By the time Ueda comes back, Kame has gone back to being a dead weight as he lets Jin support him.
Kame is so far gone that Jin has a hard time understanding him as he tries to say something again “hmmm....Jin………………..I don’t want to go home, I don’t want to see my father.”
“Its okay Kame, I’ll look after you” Jin reassures not entirely sure what Kame is mumbling about.
Ueda comes bouncing back over, Jin notices he’s not with the girls.
“Did you tell them we’re leaving?”
“Yeh, don’t worry they seem to be entertaining themselves” Ueda shrugs clearly not caring what the girls think about them leaving.
Ueda seems to remember something as he takes in Jin and Kame in front of him.
“What?” Jin asks exasperated, as much as he wants to stand here talking Kame is actually really heavy.
“He is letting you touch him?” Ueda lets out like he can’t believe what he is seeing. God, Jin thinks is now really the time?…Kame is heavy.
“Of course he is, he can’t exactly stand on his own two feet you know” Jin replies not understanding Ueda at all. Ueda just stares at him and Kame.
By the time they finally make it back to Ueda’s apartment Kame is beginning to mumble again.
“Don’t take me home, don’t take me home” and then “they’re coming again….tell them to stop, …..tell them not to hurt me, tell them not to hurt me anymore….” Jin is becoming more and more concerned as Kame’s rambling gets more and more wild.
“It’s beginning” Ueda states gloomily as he unlocks the door to his apartment.
“What’s beginning?” Jin asks as he tries to drag Kame into the apartment….damn why is he so heavy?
‘You’ll see” Ueda says cryptically a frown on his face “just take him into the bedroom, I’ll go get some stuff”
Jin stares off after Ueda as he heads into the kitchen. Jin has no idea what Ueda is going on about but he is beginning to feel a little anxious as Kame’s rambling doesn’t stop. Jin all but drags Kame into the bedroom flopping him down on the bed. Ueda’s room is similar to Jin’s. There is enough room for the double bed to fit comfortably and an ensuite bathroom to the right.
Kame begins mumbling again as Jin moves to take off Kame’s shoes.
“Jin………don’t let them hurt me…” Kame pleads thrashing his body from side to side like he is trying to shake something or someone off of him. Jin is reminded of the time when he and Kame feel down the stairs. He had begged him to protect him from someone then too.
All of a sudden Jin feels a mixture of emotions course through his body. He feels sadness as he tries to fathom the horrendous things could have happened to his best friend, anger at the bastards who made him this way, guilt at not being here to protect him and something else…………something else that he can’t quite pin point.
What has happened to you Kazu?
“Kame its okay” he says instead “its okay” he says over and over as the younger one continues to thrash on the bed trying to escape from his own mind.
Jin places his hands on Kame’s shoulders in an attempt to smooth him, to stop him from moving around on the bed. Kame opens his eyes immediately as soon as Jin touches him. For one split second he thinks Kame is going to push him away, but instead Kame grabs him and pulls him closer. Kame wraps his arms around Jin, not letting him move. Jin’s heart leaps into his mouth as Kame starts to sob.
“please I just want this to end, please please please please” Jin can’t bare it anymore as he fights to hold back his own tears. How could someone hurt his Kazu, his best friend, how could they destroy someone’s life like this. It is clear to Jin now. Kame’s distance…..all his fear. He isn’t afraid of Jin…….he’s just afraid of life…………afraid of himself.
“It’s okay……..it’s okay” Jin repeats over and over like a mantra, not only for Kame’s benefit but his own.
After what feels like an eternity, Kame finally releases him, his body going slack. Jin sits up wiping his own tears with the back of his hand. He feels lost…..he has no idea how to help Kame. His feelings of hopelessness are almost worse than his regret.
Now this is how Kame should be he thinks as he watches the boy sleeping next to him. Peaceful and beautiful.
“Ah, he’s fallen asleep” Ueda says from the doorway. Jin wonders how long he’s been standing there.
“Here, give this to him when he wakes up” Ueda says handing Jin a glass of water and two advils, a pained expression in his face
“Because he won’t sleep for long”
“How long is he going to be like this” Jin asks his stomach in knots, realising this is what Ueda was talking about when he said ‘it’s beginning’.
“A while” Ueda says nonchalantly, “A few more hours at least. I’ve only seen him drink this much once before in the last two years….he was screaming the whole night, waking up every 30mins from one of his nightmares….”
‘one of his nightmares’ Jin thinks….does that mean he has nightmares even when he’s not drunk. Jin is reminded of Kame’s pleas a few moments ago, the fear and pain clear in his voice.
“what happened to him?” Jin asks helplessness taking over again
“sorry, it’s not my place to say”
That’s exactly what Kame’s sister had said as well Jin thinks as he looks back at Kame’s sleeping form. Whatever happened to his best friend it’s not something others want to talk about.
Jin watches Kame as his breathing begins to fasten again, his chest rising and falling quicker with every breath.
Whatever is going on in his dreams he is clearly fighting his demons, Jin thinks.
If he ever wants to know the truth about what happened to Kame he is going to have to ask him himself.
“Sorry, I need to go and make a call” Ueda says motioning to the phone in his hand “Kame’s father is going to go ballistic when he finds out Kame is not at home, he wasn’t even supposed to come out with us tonight” Ueda finishes.
Jin looks up at Ueda when he hears this…Kame’s father doesn’t let him go out….Jin finds himself resenting the man even more and more. After what he found out tonight Jin will never forgive Kame’s father for lying to him…for making him believe that Kame hated him…..all those months of pain and suffering could have been avoided if Kame’s father hadn’t interfered.
How did he possibly have the nerve to sit there the other night at that dinner and speak to Jin like he had done nothing……..Jin is suddenly filled with rage, his blood running hot through his veins. He is sure this is how Kame had felt earlier when he realised what his father had done. No wonder Kame had decided to get drunk.
“How much trouble is he in?” Jin asks wanting to know how far he will have to go to protect Kazuya from his own father.
“I can’t really say…Kazuya only gives me the edited version of what goes on in his house…he won’t hit him or anything though if that’s what you’re worried about”
Jin knows that Kame doesn’t have to be hit for him to get hurt.
Jin just nods his head in Ueda’s direction as the other leaves the room.
Ueda walks out, his heart in a million pieces.
When Ueda had walked into the room only a few moments ago with the glass of water from the kitchen, what he saw had shattered him. Ueda felt like his heart was splintering into thousands of pieces and spilling out of his chest onto the floor. Kame had his arms around Jin…..Kame had his arms around Jin……Kame had his arms around Jin….Kame had his arms around Jin…..this was the only thing that was going through his mind as he stood by the door, the shattered pieces of his heart crunching under his feet.
Ueda had stood there watching, as Jin comforted Kame, whispering soothing words into his ear. Kame didn’t let go of him. How come Jin can touch you? Ueda wants to know….how come he can and I can’t? Ueda doesn’t know how long he stood there for watching them silently. He only knew that he couldn’t be there anymore, couldn’t stand to see Jin sitting next to Kame….his Kame……………….well it’s not his Kame anymore, Ueda thinks as loss surrounds him, pulling him under.
Ueda moves into the lounge room he needs to make a call.
“Hi Amaya” Ueda says after she picks up on the third ring.
“Ueda?” She asks clearly shocked to be receiving a call from him.
“Um, Kame kind of got drunk and his pretty out of it……” Ueda explains trailing off.
“Fuck!.......Ueda you where supposed to look after him” Amaya exclaims
“He’s okay” Ueda reassures her “He’s at my place right now, Jin’s looking after him” Ueda feels his chest tighten at the thought of Jin and Kame.
“Jin?!” Amaya says in surprise “as in Akanishi Jin”
“errr…” Ueda mumbles, only now realising that he doesn’t even know Jin’s last name.
“Is he okay?” Amaya continues. “Shit what are we going to do?” she babbles not even giving Ueda a chance to talk. “You can’t bring him home that will be even worse than having him stay out all night.”
“That’s what I was thinking too, maybe he should just stay here for the night” Ueda suggests.
“Look, I’ll see what I can do. He’s already in trouble for what happened the other week at your apartment, you know when he feel down the stairs. If Dad finds out about this……….I’m not really sure what will happen this time”
“I know…but there nothing else I can do”
“I know too……..just leave it with me okay. I’ll see what I can do”
“okay bye, thanks Amaya”
“okay bye………………make sure you look after him….or I’ll be the one who wants your head on a plate”
Geeze, Ueda thinks as he hangs up. He never realised that Amaya cared so much about Kame. He had always believed her to be conniving and cunning, manipulating people into getting what she wants, just like her father. He had always assumed that she thought Kame was a burden on the family, that he was only going to cause disgrace to their name. But hearing her say this it sounds like she does love Kazuya after all. Maybe Ueda’s perceptions had always been wrong. Anyway…..he hopes she can put her manipulative skills into good use and come up with something good to cover for Kame. Ueda is really scared for the boy’s safety.
‘I can’t go back in there’ Ueda thinks as pain and loss come crashing back into him, ‘there is no way I can watch Kame touching another man’.
Ueda heads for the front door, wanting to be anywhere but here. This just hurts too much.
∞Kame is waiting for Koki to arrive.
‘He’s late’ Kame thinks just as his boyfriend appears outside the coffee shop.
“Hey baby” Koki says when he comes within earshot.
“Hi” Kame replies as he takes in his boyfriend’s appearance while reaching up to give him a quick kiss. Kame takes in the small bruise under his eye and the darker bruises running up his arms.
“Have you been fighting again?” Kame accuses, glaring at the older
“No, of course not” he lies. Kame gives him another glare. One that clearly says he knows his boyfriend is lying.
“It’s nothing. Ijima and his men where hassling me again. They caught me outside my apartment” the man says with a sigh
“Koki….I thought you paid back all the money already….you told me you paid it back”
“I did…it’s just that now I owe them more” the man confesses
“Koki!” Kame exclaims outraged that his boyfriend borrowed money again without telling him “What did you need it for this time?…..drugs? I told you I don’t need them anymore….and neither should you. It only leads to trouble”
“Not drugs.” the man states
“Then what?” Kame demands. His boyfriend has definitely been doing something behind his back again.
“It’s nothing” Koki says
“Tell me!” Kame all but yells
“Don’t worry it’s nothing bad….it was just for rent money. I told you I’m getting my life together right? For us. So we can be together. Don’t you believe me?”
Kame’s heart softens at this, Koki is trying really hard he thinks. Now that he’s run away from home and he’s living with Koki. His boyfriend is making an extra effort to keep his life on track this time.
“Of course I believe you” he says affectionately, love and trust shinning in his eyes.
“Well then in that case, lets do something for your birthday. It’s soon right?” the older man asks….a suggestive smile pulling at his lips. When he acts like this Kame has no choice but to cave in to this man’s wants. Kame would do anything for him….he has already given him everything………except……Kame has a feeling he knows where this is going.
“What did you have in mind?” Kame suggests playing along
“Well, seeing as you’ll be turning 18 and that makes you legal…..I thought maybe you might want to……you know” Koki says with a small smile.
Koki has been the best about all of this. When they first started going out a few months back, Kame hadn’t been ready to give this man everything yet. Now that it was his birthday soon…..well it just felt right.
Kame beams up at the older man trying to pour all of his feelings into just one look.
“We could go to a hotel….make it special……I want your first time to be special Kame-chan……..because you are special to me”
Kame can’t say anything. This man just continues to sweep him of his feet. Kame nods his head, smiling at Koki like he is the only light in his world.∞
11.53pm
Kame wakes up screaming, his voice ripping through his throat. His whole body is drenched in sweat as he sits bolt upright in the bed. He can feel his heart pounding loudly in his chest as it to tries to rip through his body. He can’t hold back the tears as the remanent from his nightmare back to haunt him.
“Kazuya……………….Kazuya”
He turns his head to find someone sitting beside him, their face etched with concern.
“It’s okay Kazuya, it’s just a dream” the man says softly brushing the dripping wet hair out of his eyes.
“It’s okay…………everything’s fine………….I’ll protect you”
∞Kame is lying on an unfamiliar bed when he finally comes to his senses.
“What……….what is going on” he demands trying to sit up so he can see where he is. Pain shoots through his body as he manages to sit up almost threatening to make him pass out again.
What happened to me?................where am I? He can remember nothing. How did I get here?.................why does my body hurt. So many questions run through his mind as he tries to take stock of his surroundings.
There is a funny taste in his mouth and he feels parched like he hasn’t drunk anything in days. The room around him is dark, only a sliver of light passing through a window on the opposite side of the room. As his eyes adjust to the light, he becomes aware of someone else in the room. He is not alone.
“Yes. He’s awake. Call the boss” he hears someone saying into a phone.
For the first time since waking up Kame is scared. Fear pure and undiluted runs through his body as the man comes closer.
“Where am I?” Kazuya demands much brave than he feels.
The man gives a small chuckle.
“Don’t worry. I won’t hurt you. I’m not allowed. You are only for them” he says sounding like he doesn’t agree with whoever ‘them’ are.
Fear courses through his again at the man’s words. Where is Koki? He thinks……………where is Koki?.............where is Koki? Did they get him too? Suddenly fear surges through him stronger than before. What if they got Koki too? Are they going to hurt him too?
“Where is Koki?” Kazuya demands. The man had walked closer to the bed as he was taking in Kazuya’s pathetic form.
“Who?” he sneers “you mean that guy who is supposed to be your lover? The one who is supposed to protect you?”
“Where is he?” Kazuya demands again determined to get an answer. Even though he is here trapped on the bed helpless, he needs to know!
The last thing Kame can remember is going to the hotel with Koki, they had paid for the room and headed for the elevator. After the he can remember nothing.
The man doesn’t reply as he continues to chuckle.
“Don’t worry. Your boyfriend is just fine. Trust me” But Kame doesn’t trust him. Who is this man? Kame has no idea where he is or what these people want from him? But all he knows is that if something happens to Koki, he doesn’t think he will be able to go on living. ∞
12.25am
Kame bolts right up as his screams are released from his body. Panic gripping his whole body. He is frozen. He can’t move. He can’t breathe.
“Breath Kame, breath” that soothing voice says again. Kame can’t even move his body to look at who is speaking.
“Breath, God damn it”
∞ “Here, tie him to the bed. Arms and legs,” the man states forcefully, “we don’t want another incident. Do we now?”
Even though he is saying this calmly, Kame can’t but help but feel it’s a threat. Kame says nothing as the man continues to bark orders. This is the man that he had been waiting for. The one who they said was going to give him answers. So far all Kame had managed to get out of him was a slap to the face, as Kame fought against the men he had ordered to tie him up.
He doesn’t know how long he has been waiting in this room. Since he woke up, no one has even come to the room besides than man that was here originally. He received some water but that’s all.
Fear has been coursing through his body for so long now, that he hardly even registers its presence. He has been waiting for hours. He’s cold and hungry and he just wants to go home.
‘But I can’t’ he thinks ‘even if I could go home, I can’t leave Koki here to die’.
“What do you want from me?!” Kame shouts at the man who is clearly in charge.
“All in due time, all in due time” the man replies with a smile that makes Kame’s blood run cold.
“Ah, now that better. We can have a proper conversation.” he says after the men have finished tying Kame to the bed. He wriggles testing the cuffs. They are not too tight. He could manage to get his hands out if he really has to.
“Now where were we?” the man continues
“Just tell me where I am?!” Kazuya demands again.
“You are a feisty one aren’t you” the man says coming closer to the bed. “I can’t say we’ve had one of your types in a long time.”
The man is beside him now, stroking his face gently, like he’s a precious baby. Kazuya flinches at his touch, as bile rises in his throat. What is this man talking about?
“They are definitely going to like you.” He leers. “You have a very pretty face. Just like a girl. And your body………….is exquisite” he continues as he trials his fingers down the side of Kazuya’s body.
Kazuya stills as his hand travels further down. Going where it shouldn’t.
“And you have hardly even been touched. You are practically a virgin.”
“Don’t touch me!” Kazuya yells out as the man’s words begin to sink in.
“And you are beautiful in your innocence” the man continues not removing his hands, “though we may have to do something about your mouth. They won’t like hearing those kinds of things…..Don’t worry we will teach you well……they will be coming soon.” ∞
1.14am
Kame withers in disgust as he can still feel the lingering touch of the man’s hands on his body.
“Kame………..Kame……..it’s okay…….no-one is here…………..no one is going to touch you………….your safe”
∞ ‘They have to be looking for me right?............someone will find me? They have to right?’ Kame keeps telling himself this over and over. He’s not sure how long he has been here now. All he knows is that they said the first one would be coming today. What do they mean the first one?...............Kame has a faint idea with what they want from him but he can’t comprehend it.
“Are you ready?” the man asks like he actually cares about what Kazuya thinks.
“NO, NO, NO, NO!!!!!! I will never be ready! I don’t know what you want with me but I will never let anyone touch me!”
“Geez….you are feisty today” the man states “you had better behave yourself, the more willing you are the less they will hurt you”
“Sir, he is here”
“thank you, tell him I will be there soon to finalise the transaction.” the man says to one of his men who was waiting by the door.
Kazuya has nothing to say as something more than fear forms in his stomach. He is petrified. What do they want from him? Who are they? Won’t they just let him go home?
“Undress him and then leave. You can un-do the cuffs though. Mr.Nagawagi likes them fighting.” he orders to two of his men before leaving the room.
Kazuya is left naked and exposed on the bed as he waits for Mr.Nagawagi to arrive. The longer he waits the more his panic sets in. His breathing becomes erratic as his heart beat pounds in his chest.
He doesn’t have to wait too much longer before the door opens. A short bald man standing in the door way.
Kazuya can’t move a muscle as fear takes hold. It is only him and this man in the room.∞
2.34am
Kame can hear someone screaming. The scream is so full of fear and pain Kame wants to reach out and help them. Tell them it’s okay….that they can stop screaming. The blood curdling scream continues for a while longer before he realises that the sound is coming out of his own mouth. Kame feels pain slice through his whole body, deep and dark. He hasn’t felt this type of pain in a long time. The screaming starts again as the pain doesn’t stop. Only intensifying as the screaming does.
“Shhhhhhh…………….shhhhhhh……………Kame it’s okay…………your safe……………no-one is going to hurt you.” Kame can feel someone placing their hands on his shoulder’s as they try to stop his violent thrashing. For some reason the hands feel soothing and warm. The pain slowly starts to subside as the hands rubs small circles on his arms.
∞The man was right. Fighting back only made things worse. This time they have him tied to the bed. Hands and legs. He is also blind folded. Pain sears through his body as the unknown man takes him. Kazuya can do nothing but scream as this man violates him again and again. After the first time Kazuya couldn’t even move. Now it feels like his body is going to explode from pain.
“Don’t you dare fucking pass out…..you dirty little whore”
“Please, please” Kame begs “please, no more……….please stop………….please………..please………..please………….please……..please………..
please……………please” All he can do is beg. There is nothing else left in him.∞
3.45am
“Please…………….please……………please…………..please…………..please…..stop…………stop…………..stop…………stop……………stop………….don’t hurt me
……….stop………….please.”
This time all Kame feels is someone hugging him, keeping him warm and close as he continues to sob.
∞ “You have done well boy…all three liked you very much.”
“Are you going to let me go home know?” Kazuya asks all his hope and fight having left him long ago.
“Not quite just yet. Someone has made me an offer that I can’t resist”
At this Kame lifts his head. This is not what they had agreed.
“…but you said that I could go after this. You said it would be just three of them.”
The man just laughs.∞
4.00am
Kame wakes suddenly as if he has been electrocuted. Fire burning through his veins. His body is drenched in sweet again as he sits up. The familiar taste of bile rises in his throat…before he can even think about vomiting, he dashes up and runs to the bathroom. He has no time to register that his whole body is aching, that his head has a splitting head ache before he is on the floor bent over the toilet emptying his stomach.
“Kame…….are you okay?” someone asks as they rush into the bathroom after him. Kazuya can see only their feet as he leans over the bowl again. Whoever the person is, they lean over him pulling his hair out of the way as his stomach makes another attempt at defying him.
Kazuya is helpless as sobs rack his body, succumbing to the power of his nightmares.
“Kame……….it’s okay…………it’s okay” the man repeats over and over. Normally Kame would find this repulsive, letting someone else touch him. Help him. But right now he wants nothing more than to crawl into this man’s arms. To let him hold him, to let him protect him. So this is what he does. Turning around from the toilet he finds the man’s chest and wraps his arms around him. Using all his strength to never let him go.
Jin is shocked when Kame turns around and hugs him like nothing else in the world can sooth his pain. He doesn’t even care that Kame has just been throwing up….he just wants to hold him, to make everything alright again. Jin wraps his arms around the boy as well, while he starts to rock backwards and forwards soothingly like he is trying to comfort a baby. Jin has never felt more helpless in his life than he does right now. Then he has all night. Every time Kame woke up screaming he wanted to scream with him. He wanted to erase this boys pain to make it all go away, but he doesn’t know how.
Jin doesn’t know how long they have been sitting on the bathroom floor for but eventually it is apparent that the boy has finally fallen asleep. Jin picks him up like he is cradling a precious baby in his arms and takes him back to the bed. He thinks the worst of this nightmare is over, both his and Kame’s. Maybe now the boy will finally get some sleep, Jin thinks as he watches the younger man sleeping.
Part 1
Shit, Ueda thinks with a sigh he knew Kame couldn’t handle the alcohol.
“Ueda, a little help here?” Jin wheezes out from under Kame as he takes all of his weight. Ueda helps Jin with Kame pushing him gently backwards so he’s sitting in his own chair again. His head lolling to the side.
This is not the first time Ueda has seen Kame in this position, when they were younger Kame used to pass out all the time from snorting cocaine. Ueda would find him unconscious at Koki’s place, where they used to hang out with a bunch of their friends. Koki who was too high himself to notice that Kame was well and truly gone, would just leave the boy lying there on the floor. Ueda was the one who always looked after Kame, who always took him back home to face Kame’s father’s wrath.
Jin looks really concerned as he comes around the table and sits down next to Kame and brushing Kame’s hair back from his face.
“Is he going to be okay?” Jin asks not taking his eyes of the boy
“He will be fine” Ueda replys sounding resigned
“How can you say he will be fine! Look at him he’s passed out cold” Jin accuses
“Well it’s not my fault this happened. What did you say to him to make him so upset?” Ueda fires back, clearly suggesting that this is all Jin’s fault.
“You didn’t mention anything about us did you?” Ueda doesn’t know what he’ll do if Kame finds out he’s been sleeping around.
“Of course not” Jin says taken aback. “Why would I mention anything like that to him”
In that moment Ueda knows that Jin is ashamed of what they did too, that he would never have slept with Ueda if he had of known that he was friends with Kame. Ueda thinks again about what type of relationship Jin and Kame actually have. It seems to Ueda that Jin has stronger feelings than friendship towards Kame.
“We were talking about some things that happened in the past and he just got really angry all of a sudden. I didn’t expect it at all” Jin explains leaving out the details. He doesn’t think that he should be the one to explain this to Ueda. If Kame wants him to know Kame can tell him himself. Ueda looks at Jin who is still stoking the boy’s hair.
“Oh” is all the response Jin gets
“we need to take him home” Jin states
Ueda shakes his head. “No, we can’t take him home not like this….his father would skin us alive….and I’m not exaggerating” Ueda says in a serious voice that makes Jin believe him immediately. After what Jin just found out about Kame’s father it doesn’t surprise him at all that Ueda is not welcome in the house. It seems that Kame’s father dislikes all of Kame’s friends.
“Ok” Jin agrees “let’s take him back to my place then”
“No, mine. He will feel better if he wakes up in familiar surroundings”
Jin agrees to get Kame up off his seat while Ueda goes and finds the girls they had been with earlier. He has to tell them they are leaving.
“Kame…Kame” Jin says lightly shaking him, trying to rouse Kame from unconsciousness.
“ummmmm…….” Kame gives an inaudible groan
“Kame, you need to let me help you get up”
“ummmm…..”Kame mumbles again opening his eyes slightly “Jin, I don’t think you should touch me…..it’s not a good idea”
Jin has no idea what Kame is mumbling about as he places his arm around Kame’s waist supporting him.
“Don’t be silly, you can hardly stand” Jin says, grunting under Kame’s weight.
“ummm…..” Kame moans again sounding resigned. Well at least he’s semi-conscious Jin thinks with a sigh.
By the time Ueda comes back, Kame has gone back to being a dead weight as he lets Jin support him.
Kame is so far gone that Jin has a hard time understanding him as he tries to say something again “hmmm....Jin………………..I don’t want to go home, I don’t want to see my father.”
“Its okay Kame, I’ll look after you” Jin reassures not entirely sure what Kame is mumbling about.
Ueda comes bouncing back over, Jin notices he’s not with the girls.
“Did you tell them we’re leaving?”
“Yeh, don’t worry they seem to be entertaining themselves” Ueda shrugs clearly not caring what the girls think about them leaving.
Ueda seems to remember something as he takes in Jin and Kame in front of him.
“What?” Jin asks exasperated, as much as he wants to stand here talking Kame is actually really heavy.
“He is letting you touch him?” Ueda lets out like he can’t believe what he is seeing. God, Jin thinks is now really the time?…Kame is heavy.
“Of course he is, he can’t exactly stand on his own two feet you know” Jin replies not understanding Ueda at all. Ueda just stares at him and Kame.
By the time they finally make it back to Ueda’s apartment Kame is beginning to mumble again.
“Don’t take me home, don’t take me home” and then “they’re coming again….tell them to stop, …..tell them not to hurt me, tell them not to hurt me anymore….” Jin is becoming more and more concerned as Kame’s rambling gets more and more wild.
“It’s beginning” Ueda states gloomily as he unlocks the door to his apartment.
“What’s beginning?” Jin asks as he tries to drag Kame into the apartment….damn why is he so heavy?
‘You’ll see” Ueda says cryptically a frown on his face “just take him into the bedroom, I’ll go get some stuff”
Jin stares off after Ueda as he heads into the kitchen. Jin has no idea what Ueda is going on about but he is beginning to feel a little anxious as Kame’s rambling doesn’t stop. Jin all but drags Kame into the bedroom flopping him down on the bed. Ueda’s room is similar to Jin’s. There is enough room for the double bed to fit comfortably and an ensuite bathroom to the right.
Kame begins mumbling again as Jin moves to take off Kame’s shoes.
“Jin………don’t let them hurt me…” Kame pleads thrashing his body from side to side like he is trying to shake something or someone off of him. Jin is reminded of the time when he and Kame feel down the stairs. He had begged him to protect him from someone then too.
All of a sudden Jin feels a mixture of emotions course through his body. He feels sadness as he tries to fathom the horrendous things could have happened to his best friend, anger at the bastards who made him this way, guilt at not being here to protect him and something else…………something else that he can’t quite pin point.
What has happened to you Kazu?
“Kame its okay” he says instead “its okay” he says over and over as the younger one continues to thrash on the bed trying to escape from his own mind.
Jin places his hands on Kame’s shoulders in an attempt to smooth him, to stop him from moving around on the bed. Kame opens his eyes immediately as soon as Jin touches him. For one split second he thinks Kame is going to push him away, but instead Kame grabs him and pulls him closer. Kame wraps his arms around Jin, not letting him move. Jin’s heart leaps into his mouth as Kame starts to sob.
“please I just want this to end, please please please please” Jin can’t bare it anymore as he fights to hold back his own tears. How could someone hurt his Kazu, his best friend, how could they destroy someone’s life like this. It is clear to Jin now. Kame’s distance…..all his fear. He isn’t afraid of Jin…….he’s just afraid of life…………afraid of himself.
“It’s okay……..it’s okay” Jin repeats over and over like a mantra, not only for Kame’s benefit but his own.
After what feels like an eternity, Kame finally releases him, his body going slack. Jin sits up wiping his own tears with the back of his hand. He feels lost…..he has no idea how to help Kame. His feelings of hopelessness are almost worse than his regret.
Now this is how Kame should be he thinks as he watches the boy sleeping next to him. Peaceful and beautiful.
“Ah, he’s fallen asleep” Ueda says from the doorway. Jin wonders how long he’s been standing there.
“Here, give this to him when he wakes up” Ueda says handing Jin a glass of water and two advils, a pained expression in his face
“Because he won’t sleep for long”
“How long is he going to be like this” Jin asks his stomach in knots, realising this is what Ueda was talking about when he said ‘it’s beginning’.
“A while” Ueda says nonchalantly, “A few more hours at least. I’ve only seen him drink this much once before in the last two years….he was screaming the whole night, waking up every 30mins from one of his nightmares….”
‘one of his nightmares’ Jin thinks….does that mean he has nightmares even when he’s not drunk. Jin is reminded of Kame’s pleas a few moments ago, the fear and pain clear in his voice.
“what happened to him?” Jin asks helplessness taking over again
“sorry, it’s not my place to say”
That’s exactly what Kame’s sister had said as well Jin thinks as he looks back at Kame’s sleeping form. Whatever happened to his best friend it’s not something others want to talk about.
Jin watches Kame as his breathing begins to fasten again, his chest rising and falling quicker with every breath.
Whatever is going on in his dreams he is clearly fighting his demons, Jin thinks.
If he ever wants to know the truth about what happened to Kame he is going to have to ask him himself.
“Sorry, I need to go and make a call” Ueda says motioning to the phone in his hand “Kame’s father is going to go ballistic when he finds out Kame is not at home, he wasn’t even supposed to come out with us tonight” Ueda finishes.
Jin looks up at Ueda when he hears this…Kame’s father doesn’t let him go out….Jin finds himself resenting the man even more and more. After what he found out tonight Jin will never forgive Kame’s father for lying to him…for making him believe that Kame hated him…..all those months of pain and suffering could have been avoided if Kame’s father hadn’t interfered.
How did he possibly have the nerve to sit there the other night at that dinner and speak to Jin like he had done nothing……..Jin is suddenly filled with rage, his blood running hot through his veins. He is sure this is how Kame had felt earlier when he realised what his father had done. No wonder Kame had decided to get drunk.
“How much trouble is he in?” Jin asks wanting to know how far he will have to go to protect Kazuya from his own father.
“I can’t really say…Kazuya only gives me the edited version of what goes on in his house…he won’t hit him or anything though if that’s what you’re worried about”
Jin knows that Kame doesn’t have to be hit for him to get hurt.
Jin just nods his head in Ueda’s direction as the other leaves the room.
Ueda walks out, his heart in a million pieces.
When Ueda had walked into the room only a few moments ago with the glass of water from the kitchen, what he saw had shattered him. Ueda felt like his heart was splintering into thousands of pieces and spilling out of his chest onto the floor. Kame had his arms around Jin…..Kame had his arms around Jin……Kame had his arms around Jin….Kame had his arms around Jin…..this was the only thing that was going through his mind as he stood by the door, the shattered pieces of his heart crunching under his feet.
Ueda had stood there watching, as Jin comforted Kame, whispering soothing words into his ear. Kame didn’t let go of him. How come Jin can touch you? Ueda wants to know….how come he can and I can’t? Ueda doesn’t know how long he stood there for watching them silently. He only knew that he couldn’t be there anymore, couldn’t stand to see Jin sitting next to Kame….his Kame……………….well it’s not his Kame anymore, Ueda thinks as loss surrounds him, pulling him under.
Ueda moves into the lounge room he needs to make a call.
“Hi Amaya” Ueda says after she picks up on the third ring.
“Ueda?” She asks clearly shocked to be receiving a call from him.
“Um, Kame kind of got drunk and his pretty out of it……” Ueda explains trailing off.
“Fuck!.......Ueda you where supposed to look after him” Amaya exclaims
“He’s okay” Ueda reassures her “He’s at my place right now, Jin’s looking after him” Ueda feels his chest tighten at the thought of Jin and Kame.
“Jin?!” Amaya says in surprise “as in Akanishi Jin”
“errr…” Ueda mumbles, only now realising that he doesn’t even know Jin’s last name.
“Is he okay?” Amaya continues. “Shit what are we going to do?” she babbles not even giving Ueda a chance to talk. “You can’t bring him home that will be even worse than having him stay out all night.”
“That’s what I was thinking too, maybe he should just stay here for the night” Ueda suggests.
“Look, I’ll see what I can do. He’s already in trouble for what happened the other week at your apartment, you know when he feel down the stairs. If Dad finds out about this……….I’m not really sure what will happen this time”
“I know…but there nothing else I can do”
“I know too……..just leave it with me okay. I’ll see what I can do”
“okay bye, thanks Amaya”
“okay bye………………make sure you look after him….or I’ll be the one who wants your head on a plate”
Geeze, Ueda thinks as he hangs up. He never realised that Amaya cared so much about Kame. He had always believed her to be conniving and cunning, manipulating people into getting what she wants, just like her father. He had always assumed that she thought Kame was a burden on the family, that he was only going to cause disgrace to their name. But hearing her say this it sounds like she does love Kazuya after all. Maybe Ueda’s perceptions had always been wrong. Anyway…..he hopes she can put her manipulative skills into good use and come up with something good to cover for Kame. Ueda is really scared for the boy’s safety.
‘I can’t go back in there’ Ueda thinks as pain and loss come crashing back into him, ‘there is no way I can watch Kame touching another man’.
Ueda heads for the front door, wanting to be anywhere but here. This just hurts too much.
∞Kame is waiting for Koki to arrive.
‘He’s late’ Kame thinks just as his boyfriend appears outside the coffee shop.
“Hey baby” Koki says when he comes within earshot.
“Hi” Kame replies as he takes in his boyfriend’s appearance while reaching up to give him a quick kiss. Kame takes in the small bruise under his eye and the darker bruises running up his arms.
“Have you been fighting again?” Kame accuses, glaring at the older
“No, of course not” he lies. Kame gives him another glare. One that clearly says he knows his boyfriend is lying.
“It’s nothing. Ijima and his men where hassling me again. They caught me outside my apartment” the man says with a sigh
“Koki….I thought you paid back all the money already….you told me you paid it back”
“I did…it’s just that now I owe them more” the man confesses
“Koki!” Kame exclaims outraged that his boyfriend borrowed money again without telling him “What did you need it for this time?…..drugs? I told you I don’t need them anymore….and neither should you. It only leads to trouble”
“Not drugs.” the man states
“Then what?” Kame demands. His boyfriend has definitely been doing something behind his back again.
“It’s nothing” Koki says
“Tell me!” Kame all but yells
“Don’t worry it’s nothing bad….it was just for rent money. I told you I’m getting my life together right? For us. So we can be together. Don’t you believe me?”
Kame’s heart softens at this, Koki is trying really hard he thinks. Now that he’s run away from home and he’s living with Koki. His boyfriend is making an extra effort to keep his life on track this time.
“Of course I believe you” he says affectionately, love and trust shinning in his eyes.
“Well then in that case, lets do something for your birthday. It’s soon right?” the older man asks….a suggestive smile pulling at his lips. When he acts like this Kame has no choice but to cave in to this man’s wants. Kame would do anything for him….he has already given him everything………except……Kame has a feeling he knows where this is going.
“What did you have in mind?” Kame suggests playing along
“Well, seeing as you’ll be turning 18 and that makes you legal…..I thought maybe you might want to……you know” Koki says with a small smile.
Koki has been the best about all of this. When they first started going out a few months back, Kame hadn’t been ready to give this man everything yet. Now that it was his birthday soon…..well it just felt right.
Kame beams up at the older man trying to pour all of his feelings into just one look.
“We could go to a hotel….make it special……I want your first time to be special Kame-chan……..because you are special to me”
Kame can’t say anything. This man just continues to sweep him of his feet. Kame nods his head, smiling at Koki like he is the only light in his world.∞
11.53pm
Kame wakes up screaming, his voice ripping through his throat. His whole body is drenched in sweat as he sits bolt upright in the bed. He can feel his heart pounding loudly in his chest as it to tries to rip through his body. He can’t hold back the tears as the remanent from his nightmare back to haunt him.
“Kazuya……………….Kazuya”
He turns his head to find someone sitting beside him, their face etched with concern.
“It’s okay Kazuya, it’s just a dream” the man says softly brushing the dripping wet hair out of his eyes.
“It’s okay…………everything’s fine………….I’ll protect you”
∞Kame is lying on an unfamiliar bed when he finally comes to his senses.
“What……….what is going on” he demands trying to sit up so he can see where he is. Pain shoots through his body as he manages to sit up almost threatening to make him pass out again.
What happened to me?................where am I? He can remember nothing. How did I get here?.................why does my body hurt. So many questions run through his mind as he tries to take stock of his surroundings.
There is a funny taste in his mouth and he feels parched like he hasn’t drunk anything in days. The room around him is dark, only a sliver of light passing through a window on the opposite side of the room. As his eyes adjust to the light, he becomes aware of someone else in the room. He is not alone.
“Yes. He’s awake. Call the boss” he hears someone saying into a phone.
For the first time since waking up Kame is scared. Fear pure and undiluted runs through his body as the man comes closer.
“Where am I?” Kazuya demands much brave than he feels.
The man gives a small chuckle.
“Don’t worry. I won’t hurt you. I’m not allowed. You are only for them” he says sounding like he doesn’t agree with whoever ‘them’ are.
Fear courses through his again at the man’s words. Where is Koki? He thinks……………where is Koki?.............where is Koki? Did they get him too? Suddenly fear surges through him stronger than before. What if they got Koki too? Are they going to hurt him too?
“Where is Koki?” Kazuya demands. The man had walked closer to the bed as he was taking in Kazuya’s pathetic form.
“Who?” he sneers “you mean that guy who is supposed to be your lover? The one who is supposed to protect you?”
“Where is he?” Kazuya demands again determined to get an answer. Even though he is here trapped on the bed helpless, he needs to know!
The last thing Kame can remember is going to the hotel with Koki, they had paid for the room and headed for the elevator. After the he can remember nothing.
The man doesn’t reply as he continues to chuckle.
“Don’t worry. Your boyfriend is just fine. Trust me” But Kame doesn’t trust him. Who is this man? Kame has no idea where he is or what these people want from him? But all he knows is that if something happens to Koki, he doesn’t think he will be able to go on living. ∞
12.25am
Kame bolts right up as his screams are released from his body. Panic gripping his whole body. He is frozen. He can’t move. He can’t breathe.
“Breath Kame, breath” that soothing voice says again. Kame can’t even move his body to look at who is speaking.
“Breath, God damn it”
∞ “Here, tie him to the bed. Arms and legs,” the man states forcefully, “we don’t want another incident. Do we now?”
Even though he is saying this calmly, Kame can’t but help but feel it’s a threat. Kame says nothing as the man continues to bark orders. This is the man that he had been waiting for. The one who they said was going to give him answers. So far all Kame had managed to get out of him was a slap to the face, as Kame fought against the men he had ordered to tie him up.
He doesn’t know how long he has been waiting in this room. Since he woke up, no one has even come to the room besides than man that was here originally. He received some water but that’s all.
Fear has been coursing through his body for so long now, that he hardly even registers its presence. He has been waiting for hours. He’s cold and hungry and he just wants to go home.
‘But I can’t’ he thinks ‘even if I could go home, I can’t leave Koki here to die’.
“What do you want from me?!” Kame shouts at the man who is clearly in charge.
“All in due time, all in due time” the man replies with a smile that makes Kame’s blood run cold.
“Ah, now that better. We can have a proper conversation.” he says after the men have finished tying Kame to the bed. He wriggles testing the cuffs. They are not too tight. He could manage to get his hands out if he really has to.
“Now where were we?” the man continues
“Just tell me where I am?!” Kazuya demands again.
“You are a feisty one aren’t you” the man says coming closer to the bed. “I can’t say we’ve had one of your types in a long time.”
The man is beside him now, stroking his face gently, like he’s a precious baby. Kazuya flinches at his touch, as bile rises in his throat. What is this man talking about?
“They are definitely going to like you.” He leers. “You have a very pretty face. Just like a girl. And your body………….is exquisite” he continues as he trials his fingers down the side of Kazuya’s body.
Kazuya stills as his hand travels further down. Going where it shouldn’t.
“And you have hardly even been touched. You are practically a virgin.”
“Don’t touch me!” Kazuya yells out as the man’s words begin to sink in.
“And you are beautiful in your innocence” the man continues not removing his hands, “though we may have to do something about your mouth. They won’t like hearing those kinds of things…..Don’t worry we will teach you well……they will be coming soon.” ∞
1.14am
Kame withers in disgust as he can still feel the lingering touch of the man’s hands on his body.
“Kame………..Kame……..it’s okay…….no-one is here…………..no one is going to touch you………….your safe”
∞ ‘They have to be looking for me right?............someone will find me? They have to right?’ Kame keeps telling himself this over and over. He’s not sure how long he has been here now. All he knows is that they said the first one would be coming today. What do they mean the first one?...............Kame has a faint idea with what they want from him but he can’t comprehend it.
“Are you ready?” the man asks like he actually cares about what Kazuya thinks.
“NO, NO, NO, NO!!!!!! I will never be ready! I don’t know what you want with me but I will never let anyone touch me!”
“Geez….you are feisty today” the man states “you had better behave yourself, the more willing you are the less they will hurt you”
“Sir, he is here”
“thank you, tell him I will be there soon to finalise the transaction.” the man says to one of his men who was waiting by the door.
Kazuya has nothing to say as something more than fear forms in his stomach. He is petrified. What do they want from him? Who are they? Won’t they just let him go home?
“Undress him and then leave. You can un-do the cuffs though. Mr.Nagawagi likes them fighting.” he orders to two of his men before leaving the room.
Kazuya is left naked and exposed on the bed as he waits for Mr.Nagawagi to arrive. The longer he waits the more his panic sets in. His breathing becomes erratic as his heart beat pounds in his chest.
He doesn’t have to wait too much longer before the door opens. A short bald man standing in the door way.
Kazuya can’t move a muscle as fear takes hold. It is only him and this man in the room.∞
2.34am
Kame can hear someone screaming. The scream is so full of fear and pain Kame wants to reach out and help them. Tell them it’s okay….that they can stop screaming. The blood curdling scream continues for a while longer before he realises that the sound is coming out of his own mouth. Kame feels pain slice through his whole body, deep and dark. He hasn’t felt this type of pain in a long time. The screaming starts again as the pain doesn’t stop. Only intensifying as the screaming does.
“Shhhhhhh…………….shhhhhhh……………Kame it’s okay…………your safe……………no-one is going to hurt you.” Kame can feel someone placing their hands on his shoulder’s as they try to stop his violent thrashing. For some reason the hands feel soothing and warm. The pain slowly starts to subside as the hands rubs small circles on his arms.
∞The man was right. Fighting back only made things worse. This time they have him tied to the bed. Hands and legs. He is also blind folded. Pain sears through his body as the unknown man takes him. Kazuya can do nothing but scream as this man violates him again and again. After the first time Kazuya couldn’t even move. Now it feels like his body is going to explode from pain.
“Don’t you dare fucking pass out…..you dirty little whore”
“Please, please” Kame begs “please, no more……….please stop………….please………..please………..please………….please……..please………..
please……………please” All he can do is beg. There is nothing else left in him.∞
3.45am
“Please…………….please……………please…………..please…………..please…..stop…………stop…………..stop…………stop……………stop………….don’t hurt me
……….stop………….please.”
This time all Kame feels is someone hugging him, keeping him warm and close as he continues to sob.
∞ “You have done well boy…all three liked you very much.”
“Are you going to let me go home know?” Kazuya asks all his hope and fight having left him long ago.
“Not quite just yet. Someone has made me an offer that I can’t resist”
At this Kame lifts his head. This is not what they had agreed.
“…but you said that I could go after this. You said it would be just three of them.”
The man just laughs.∞
4.00am
Kame wakes suddenly as if he has been electrocuted. Fire burning through his veins. His body is drenched in sweet again as he sits up. The familiar taste of bile rises in his throat…before he can even think about vomiting, he dashes up and runs to the bathroom. He has no time to register that his whole body is aching, that his head has a splitting head ache before he is on the floor bent over the toilet emptying his stomach.
“Kame…….are you okay?” someone asks as they rush into the bathroom after him. Kazuya can see only their feet as he leans over the bowl again. Whoever the person is, they lean over him pulling his hair out of the way as his stomach makes another attempt at defying him.
Kazuya is helpless as sobs rack his body, succumbing to the power of his nightmares.
“Kame……….it’s okay…………it’s okay” the man repeats over and over. Normally Kame would find this repulsive, letting someone else touch him. Help him. But right now he wants nothing more than to crawl into this man’s arms. To let him hold him, to let him protect him. So this is what he does. Turning around from the toilet he finds the man’s chest and wraps his arms around him. Using all his strength to never let him go.
Jin is shocked when Kame turns around and hugs him like nothing else in the world can sooth his pain. He doesn’t even care that Kame has just been throwing up….he just wants to hold him, to make everything alright again. Jin wraps his arms around the boy as well, while he starts to rock backwards and forwards soothingly like he is trying to comfort a baby. Jin has never felt more helpless in his life than he does right now. Then he has all night. Every time Kame woke up screaming he wanted to scream with him. He wanted to erase this boys pain to make it all go away, but he doesn’t know how.
Jin doesn’t know how long they have been sitting on the bathroom floor for but eventually it is apparent that the boy has finally fallen asleep. Jin picks him up like he is cradling a precious baby in his arms and takes him back to the bed. He thinks the worst of this nightmare is over, both his and Kame’s. Maybe now the boy will finally get some sleep, Jin thinks as he watches the younger man sleeping.